- beer pal
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pretty good banana today. maybe just slightly underripe - texture pretty good but a bit of a starchy mouthfeel. flavour a little bland. tomorrow's banana should be right in the sweet spot
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Jan 5, 2021 21:02
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Mar 29, 2024 00:10
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- nut
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sounds a lot like beer pal's banana review tbqh
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Jan 5, 2021 22:18
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- mailorder bees
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FLUFFERNUTTER
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maybe there'll be more fruit later?
thanks Manifisto!
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Jan 5, 2021 22:33
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- beer pal
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just u wait til mid afternoon
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Jan 5, 2021 22:33
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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banana is a fruit that resembles a penis
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Jan 5, 2021 22:34
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- mailorder bees
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FLUFFERNUTTER
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can you say that on the internet
thanks Manifisto!
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Jan 5, 2021 22:38
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- beer pal
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Bartlett pear, a little on the small side, and a bit of impact damage in one spot. Texture was optimal - very good crunch. Flavour a bit mild, but as any fruit eater will know there's a tradeoff to be had wrt ripeness between firm texture and flavour intensity. there's a lot of controversy on this point, but personally I put greater value on good texture
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Jan 5, 2021 23:02
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- FutonForensic
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this guy knows what they're talking about. pear texture is everything. wisdom
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Jan 5, 2021 23:07
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- nut
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me and the other judges have decided that it is now oka to call it a fruit review
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Jan 5, 2021 23:20
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- frump truck
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hello... again!
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where is fruit pal to do some beer reviews
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Jan 6, 2021 00:10
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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it doesn't feel right unless there's a lengthy preamble about your experiences with the fruit as a child, maybe a story about your family or some information about how the fruit was procured before you get to the actual fruit review. At least that's what I've learned from online recipes and reviews.
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Jan 6, 2021 00:13
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- beer pal
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luvcow's fruit review review
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Jan 6, 2021 00:15
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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I remember as a small child when my neighbor, billy atton, fell from old Mr. brown's apple tree. we'd been stealing apples, as we often did during those halcyon days of our youth, and then eating them behind his barn where years later I'd have my first kiss with molly boehler. from inside the barn we'd hear the hems and jaws of the milk donkeys intermittently broken by the crunching of the crisp McIntosh apples we'd just pilfered, and as the juice dropped down our faces we'd chuckle at our shenanigans feeling like we were tiny robin hoods and will Scarlett's liberating treasures from the wicked king Jon. it was that day that billy fell, his arm torn open by his tibia, blood soaking into the lush green grass beneath him, that I grew to fear farmers and their wrath, as he lay shrieking in pain and terror old farmer brown came racing from his house with a pitchfork and chased us off, and then viciously stabbed poor Billy over and over again until he was spread about the field like shredded pork. we ran home and cried ourselves to sleep, little tommy Johnson never spoke again, his last sound being the shouts at the old man to stop evicerating our friend. Years later they found several corpses buried in the brown's pasturesand it became apparent that Billy wasn't the first or the last child that the farmer had murdered. whenever I bite into an apple these memories come flooding back, haunting me and forcing me to relive the terror yet again.
the apple I have now is from stop and shop, it was $.79 and has a nice heft to it as I raise it to my mouth. tasty but not too sweet I give this apple a 8/10 on my fruit scale which means I would recommend it.
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Jan 6, 2021 00:25
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- blaise rascal
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"Duke, Duke, Duke, Duke of Pearl...."
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I remember as a small child when my neighbor, billy atton, fell from old Mr. brown's apple tree. we'd been stealing apples, as we often did during those halcyon days of our youth, and then eating them behind his barn where years later I'd have my first kiss with molly boehler. from inside the barn we'd hear the hems and jaws of the milk donkeys intermittently broken by the crunching of the crisp McIntosh apples we'd just pilfered, and as the juice dropped down our faces we'd chuckle at our shenanigans feeling like we were tiny robin hoods and will Scarlett's liberating treasures from the wicked king Jon. it was that day that billy fell, his arm torn open by his tibia, blood soaking into the lush green grass beneath him, that I grew to fear farmers and their wrath, as he lay shrieking in pain and terror old farmer brown came racing from his house with a pitchfork and chased us off, and then viciously stabbed poor Billy over and over again until he was spread about the field like shredded pork. we ran home and cried ourselves to sleep, little tommy Johnson never spoke again, his last sound being the shouts at the old man to stop evicerating our friend. Years later they found several corpses buried in the brown's pasturesand it became apparent that Billy wasn't the first or the last child that the farmer had murdered. whenever I bite into an apple these memories come flooding back, haunting me and forcing me to relive the terror yet again.
the apple I have now is from stop and shop, it was $.79 and has a nice heft to it as I raise it to my mouth. tasty but not too sweet I give this apple a 8/10 on my fruit scale which means I would recommend it.
lmbo
ty vanisher, ty khanstant
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Jan 6, 2021 00:27
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- Manifisto
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I remember as a small child when my neighbor, billy atton, fell from old Mr. brown's apple tree. we'd been stealing apples, as we often did during those halcyon days of our youth, and then eating them behind his barn where years later I'd have my first kiss with molly boehler. from inside the barn we'd hear the hems and jaws of the milk donkeys intermittently broken by the crunching of the crisp McIntosh apples we'd just pilfered, and as the juice dropped down our faces we'd chuckle at our shenanigans feeling like we were tiny robin hoods and will Scarlett's liberating treasures from the wicked king Jon. it was that day that billy fell, his arm torn open by his tibia, blood soaking into the lush green grass beneath him, that I grew to fear farmers and their wrath, as he lay shrieking in pain and terror old farmer brown came racing from his house with a pitchfork and chased us off, and then viciously stabbed poor Billy over and over again until he was spread about the field like shredded pork. we ran home and cried ourselves to sleep, little tommy Johnson never spoke again, his last sound being the shouts at the old man to stop evicerating our friend. Years later they found several corpses buried in the brown's pasturesand it became apparent that Billy wasn't the first or the last child that the farmer had murdered. whenever I bite into an apple these memories come flooding back, haunting me and forcing me to relive the terror yet again.
the apple I have now is from stop and shop, it was $.79 and has a nice heft to it as I raise it to my mouth. tasty but not too sweet I give this apple a 8/10 on my fruit scale which means I would recommend it.
holy lol
ty nesamdoom!
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Jan 6, 2021 00:34
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- beer pal
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just had a couple mandarin oranges. both pretty average I'd say, more on the tart side than sweet. segments fairly juicy but not the most plump I've ever had
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Jan 6, 2021 00:37
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- Areola Grande
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it's a free country u pervs
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I remember as a small child when my neighbor, billy atton, fell from old Mr. brown's apple tree. we'd been stealing apples, as we often did during those halcyon days of our youth, and then eating them behind his barn where years later I'd have my first kiss with molly boehler. from inside the barn we'd hear the hems and jaws of the milk donkeys intermittently broken by the crunching of the crisp McIntosh apples we'd just pilfered, and as the juice dropped down our faces we'd chuckle at our shenanigans feeling like we were tiny robin hoods and will Scarlett's liberating treasures from the wicked king Jon. it was that day that billy fell, his arm torn open by his tibia, blood soaking into the lush green grass beneath him, that I grew to fear farmers and their wrath, as he lay shrieking in pain and terror old farmer brown came racing from his house with a pitchfork and chased us off, and then viciously stabbed poor Billy over and over again until he was spread about the field like shredded pork. we ran home and cried ourselves to sleep, little tommy Johnson never spoke again, his last sound being the shouts at the old man to stop evicerating our friend. Years later they found several corpses buried in the brown's pasturesand it became apparent that Billy wasn't the first or the last child that the farmer had murdered. whenever I bite into an apple these memories come flooding back, haunting me and forcing me to relive the terror yet again.
the apple I have now is from stop and shop, it was $.79 and has a nice heft to it as I raise it to my mouth. tasty but not too sweet I give this apple a 8/10 on my fruit scale which means I would recommend it.
slopping my milk donkeys rn
chow time girls, giddyup
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Jan 6, 2021 01:00
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- HugeGrossBurrito
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a good ripe mango man, nothin better
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Jan 6, 2021 02:30
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- beer pal
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how was the peeling experience? (i also wanted to ask this about the banana but was shy)
thanks for your question. The peeling was pretty good - as we all know, this is one of the strengths of a mandarin over larger orange varietals such as navels. The peel of the second fruit left a bit of extra pith on the outside face of some of the segments, but not enough to affect flavour noticeably.
As for the banana, there was a bit of peel splitting, as one expects with a banana still showing some green
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Jan 6, 2021 02:40
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- beer pal
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a good ripe mango man, nothin better
i dont want to spoil anything but i might happen to have a certain tropical fruit ripening in my kitchen as we speak
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Jan 6, 2021 02:41
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- Luvcow
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One day nearer spring
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do you ever eat the banana peels? they can be very dangerous if not disposed of properly. also: how do you dispose of your banana peels?
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Jan 6, 2021 02:42
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- beer pal
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i thought byob was a no politics zone
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Jan 6, 2021 02:44
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- Allie
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what a weird coincidence. pretty good banana today is what my husband calls me
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Jan 6, 2021 03:06
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- Stoner Sloth
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what a weird coincidence. pretty good banana today is what my husband calls me
well clearly he finds you very a-peeling!
sigs by the awesome Manifisto, Vanisher, City of Glompton, Pot Smoke Phoenix, Nut, Heather Papps,Prof Crocodile, knuthgrush, Ohtori Akio, Teapot, Saosyhant, Dumb Sex Parrot, w4ddl3d33, and nesamdoom!! - ty friends!
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Jan 6, 2021 03:44
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- Prof. Crocodile
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I remember as a small child when my neighbor, billy atton, fell from old Mr. brown's apple tree. we'd been stealing apples, as we often did during those halcyon days of our youth, and then eating them behind his barn where years later I'd have my first kiss with molly boehler. from inside the barn we'd hear the hems and jaws of the milk donkeys intermittently broken by the crunching of the crisp McIntosh apples we'd just pilfered, and as the juice dropped down our faces we'd chuckle at our shenanigans feeling like we were tiny robin hoods and will Scarlett's liberating treasures from the wicked king Jon. it was that day that billy fell, his arm torn open by his tibia, blood soaking into the lush green grass beneath him, that I grew to fear farmers and their wrath, as he lay shrieking in pain and terror old farmer brown came racing from his house with a pitchfork and chased us off, and then viciously stabbed poor Billy over and over again until he was spread about the field like shredded pork. we ran home and cried ourselves to sleep, little tommy Johnson never spoke again, his last sound being the shouts at the old man to stop evicerating our friend. Years later they found several corpses buried in the brown's pasturesand it became apparent that Billy wasn't the first or the last child that the farmer had murdered. whenever I bite into an apple these memories come flooding back, haunting me and forcing me to relive the terror yet again.
the apple I have now is from stop and shop, it was $.79 and has a nice heft to it as I raise it to my mouth. tasty but not too sweet I give this apple a 8/10 on my fruit scale which means I would recommend it.
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Jan 6, 2021 03:45
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- Prof. Crocodile
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fun fruit fact: bananas be berries.
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Jan 6, 2021 03:47
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- Allie
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oh look it’s the “alliteration” “alligator”
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Jan 6, 2021 03:48
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- Randy Travesty
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PHANTOM QUEEN
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I remember as a small child when my neighbor, billy atton, fell from old Mr. brown's apple tree. we'd been stealing apples, as we often did during those halcyon days of our youth, and then eating them behind his barn where years later I'd have my first kiss with molly boehler. from inside the barn we'd hear the hems and jaws of the milk donkeys intermittently broken by the crunching of the crisp McIntosh apples we'd just pilfered, and as the juice dropped down our faces we'd chuckle at our shenanigans feeling like we were tiny robin hoods and will Scarlett's liberating treasures from the wicked king Jon. it was that day that billy fell, his arm torn open by his tibia, blood soaking into the lush green grass beneath him, that I grew to fear farmers and their wrath, as he lay shrieking in pain and terror old farmer brown came racing from his house with a pitchfork and chased us off, and then viciously stabbed poor Billy over and over again until he was spread about the field like shredded pork. we ran home and cried ourselves to sleep, little tommy Johnson never spoke again, his last sound being the shouts at the old man to stop evicerating our friend. Years later they found several corpses buried in the brown's pasturesand it became apparent that Billy wasn't the first or the last child that the farmer had murdered. whenever I bite into an apple these memories come flooding back, haunting me and forcing me to relive the terror yet again.
the apple I have now is from stop and shop, it was $.79 and has a nice heft to it as I raise it to my mouth. tasty but not too sweet I give this apple a 8/10 on my fruit scale which means I would recommend it.
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Jan 6, 2021 04:33
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- beer pal
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if you recall, reader, my banana review of yesterday, jan. 5, you'll know i predicted today's banana would be of optimal ripeness. I'm glad to day my prediction was accurate. The texture was still quite firm and the flavour heightened. an early contender for banana of the year.
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Jan 6, 2021 20:38
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- beer pal
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ok I'll do my best. Imagine, if you will, that you're biting into an optimally ripe banana. it was very much like that.
https://i.imgur.com/xQxnooW.png
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Jan 6, 2021 20:54
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- Prof. Crocodile
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ok I'll do my best. Imagine, if you will, that you're biting into an optimally ripe banana. it was very much like that.
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Jan 6, 2021 22:13
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Mar 29, 2024 00:10
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- RickRogers
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Woh, is that a thing I like??
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Please review kumquats, never personally had one, thanxs
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Jan 6, 2021 22:43
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