Let's Read Animorphs! The Whole Series! Ch-ch-ch-chaaanges

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Ytlaya: Nov 13, 2005

Why is Ax talking about the telephone being modern? Andalites can't even use a telephone.

nine-gear crow posted:

For a crushing example of how time, technology and the internet have moved on since this book was written, here�s a tweet from Michael Grant getting pissed off at Dropbox like a weird old boomer

https://twitter.com/MichaelGrantBks/status/1348704337954967552

I also dislike Dropbox and get confused by it, even though I work as a web programmer. I work a university where many of the researchers use Dropbox, and on the occasions where I also need to use it (which isn't that common, but sometimes someone is using it to make a file available or something) it always takes me some time to figure out.

Ytlaya fucked around with this message at 02:16 on Jan 27, 2021

# ? Jan 27, 2021 02:11

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# ? Apr 28, 2024 11:08

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Ytlaya posted:

Why is Ax talking about the telephone being modern? Andalites can't even use a telephone.

Maybe that's why Ax thinks it's so much more modern. They had to invent the telepathic telephone or something.

# ? Jan 27, 2021 02:32

Ytlaya: Nov 13, 2005

This Jake getting swatted stuff is the worst body horror yet. Like that actually made me kind of light-headed to read. I'm thinking that maybe I never reached this book as a kid, because this is way worse than the ant thing but I don't remember it.

Epicurius posted:

He made the decision. I think in a lot of ways, this is the most painful book so far for me. It feels like Jake is trying to act like he feels like a leader should act instead of being a leader...and of course, the whole time, he's just psychologically a mess here.

This is why I like Jake and disagree with the people who think he's boring. The books are very good about conveying the reader Jake's stress/tension.

# ? Jan 27, 2021 04:03

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Ytlaya posted:

This is why I like Jake and disagree with the people who think he's boring. The books are very good about conveying the reader Jake's stress/tension.

The books are good about that. I do think Jake's characterization suffers, though, because its hard to get a clear idea what he's like other than the leader of the Animorphs. The rest of them have strong enough personalities that, if the Yeerks hadn't invaded, I could tell you what they're like. Jake, on the other hand, his strongest traits outside of his role in the Animorphs is that he likes sports and idolizes his brother.

# ? Jan 27, 2021 04:39

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Animorphs-Book 16:The Warning-Chapter 15

quote:

You think you�ve seen big houses? You haven�t seen anything till you�ve seen the home of Joe Bob Fenestre, WAA founder and megabillionaire.

From the air it looked like a junior college or something. Like a shopping center. There were a dozen separate buildings. Two guest houses, each twice the size of my home. A pool house with changing rooms and a bar that extended to the edge of the pool, which was itself in the shape of the WAA logo. A boathouse down on the riverfront with a sleek cigarette boat docked alongside. A stable big enough to house a dozen horses. What looked like an observatory. A greenhouse bursting with bright green lettuce and herbs and entire orange trees. A garage, easily big enough to store thirty or forty cars. A security building with armed guards next to a quarter-mile-long driveway. And finally, on a hill surrounded by a lawn you could have held the Superbowl on, was the house itself.

<This guy knows how to live,> Marco said with satisfaction. <Someday that�ll be me.>

<Who�ll be you? The guy mowing the lawn down there?> Rachel said.

<What do you think he�s got in that garage?> Tobias wondered. <Ferraris? Porsches? Jaguars? Vipers?>

<Not minivans and Volvo station wagons,> Marco said. <That�s for sure. Maybe a few Rolls- Royces.>

We were floating about a quarter mile above the Fenestre compound. Tobias was Tobias. Ax was in his northern harrier morph, Rachel was a bald eagle, Cassie and Marco were both ospreys. And I was in one of my favorite morphs: peregrine falcon. One of the fastest things alive. And with eyes that could see a flea on a dog from a hundred feet away.

I�d had a slightly bad feeling going into this mission. But I was feeling pretty good now. I usually feel pretty good when I�m flying.

When you are floating on a pillar of warm, up-welling air with your wings spread wide and no sound but the breeze in your feathers, you pretty much have to feel good. It is as free a feeling as you could ever imagine.

I think if you take anything from the Animorph books, it's that flying is awesome.

quote:

But at the same time I was noticing details with my laser-focus falcon�s eyes: three separate fences. One around the perimeter of the entire compound, woods, gardens, pool, tennis courts, and all. Then a second fence about twenty yards inside the first fence. And finally, a third fence just around the house and its lawn.

<This guy is a little paranoid, isn�t he?> Rachel said. <You guys see the little observation posts on the corners of the house? There are guys in there. Guys with guns.>

<And don�t forget the Rottweilers,> Cassie pointed out. <Two teams of two dogs each patrolling between the outer fence and the second fence. Each team with an armed man.>

<Colonel Hogan would never get out of this place,> I said. I was pleased when Marco and Tobias laughed. 

Cassie, with her osprey eyes that were designed to spot fish down below the water, said, <There�s some sort of underwater fence, too. I can�t see it all, but there�s a definite line beneath the water.>

<Is this human in great danger?> Ax wondered.

<Nah, that�s just the way rich people are,> Marco said.

<Okay, so how do we get into this place?> I asked. <Anyone have any brilliant ideas?>

<Fly right in through an open window,> Tobias suggested. <There�s one on the back side of the house.>

<Then what?> Cassie asked. <We need to be able to move around inside the house. Find Mr. Fenestre�s office maybe. And be able to overhear what�s going on.>

<We could do flies again,> Marco suggested.

<We could do ants, too,> Cassie said, taking an uncharacteristic shot at Marco, who had sworn never to morph an ant again.

It was time for me to decide. <Okay, first of all, we go in like Tobias said. Only Tobias stays outside and uses his eyes and ears to report what he sees through the windows. Inside half of us morph to fly, the others to cockroach. We spread out and keep in touch by thought-speak. Anyone finds
Fenestre, he calls the others. Okay?>

<Let�s do it!> Rachel said as she spilled air from her wings and plummeted toward the open window.

Down she went, huge wings swept back, talons up, her blazing white eagle�s head up to keep her eyes focused on the window.

Cassie was about twenty feet behind her, then me, then Marco and Ax. Tobias caught an updraft and soared higher, up to a level where he could see everything happening on the estate.

Down Rachel went. Down I went, fast as a bullet.

Rachel flared at the last minute to kill some of her speed, brought her talons forward, and sailed through the open -

TSAPPPPP!

<Break off! Cassie, break off!>

Cassie was already reacting. She opened her wings, yanked a hard right, and skimmed within inches of the rough stucco wall of the mansion.

<Rachel!> I yelled. <Rachel!>

She had gone through the window. She was inside. But she wasn�t answering. And with my falcon�s eyes I could just make out a dim shape lying sprawled on the floor of the room inside.

Rachel was unconscious.

At least, I hoped she was only unconscious.

Even for somebody paranoid, that seems paranoid.

Chapter 16

quote:

Rachel! Trapped!

<Sheer off! Everyone back! Get altitude!>

BRRRRRRINNNNNNNGGGG!

ScreeeeEEEE! ScreeeeEEEE! ScreeeeEEEE!

Alarms were ringing. A siren shrieked. I heard men�s voices shouting.

I saw Cassie shoot high up, passing the top of the wall to keep her momentum. But Marco and Ax were struggling with dead air. So was I. I flapped hard, but the air down that close to the ground was still and cool. I flapped harder and rose, but slowly. Too slowly.

�Shoot them!�

�What, the birds?�

�Yes! The birds! Those are the orders!�

<Prince Jake!> Ax cried out, 

I saw the northern harrier stagger in the air and start to fall. Could I reach him before he hit the ground?

<Hold on, Ax-man, I�m coming,> Tobias said. He was the only one of us with any altitude.

Down he came in a mad, suicidal stoop, plunging toward the ground.

Ax had been thirty feet in the air when he started falling. Tobias was fifty feet up. It was impossible!

But down Tobias went, like a reddish bullet. He caught up with Ax when Ax�s fluttering body was three feet from hitting the ground.

<This is gonna hurt!> Tobias yelled. He sank his talons into Ax�s shoulder and chest, opened his wings, and swept down along the falling slope of the lawn, never more than an inch from disaster.

Cassie was rushing to help. She grabbed one of Ax�s wings and she and Tobias managed to drag and haul the injured Andalite over the inner fence and the second fence. But they dropped him in the dog run.

A team of Rottweilers came tearing for him.

The dogs were racing, salivating, their big jowls shaking. Their trainer followed more slowly, unlimbering a submachine gun.

<Cassie! Tobias! Now or never!> I yelled as I went into a shallow dive. Too shallow, too slow.

The dogs were sure to see me coming. But I aimed right for them. Right for the eyes of the nearest animal. I swept my talons forward.

The dog caught sight of me out of the corner of his eye. He turned! I struck!

Snap! A massive, crushing jaw closed over my left wing tip. But the teeth found nothing but feathers. I hit the grass, rolling. The dog came after me. In three bounds he�d have me. I was helpless.

Then something rocketed down, just behind me: a second osprey! Marco!

Marco raked the dog from behind, tearing a red line up the back of the dog�s neck.

ROOWWWRR!

The dog spun, Marco flapped away, and I worked like a madman to get off the ground.

But the second dog had kept his focus on Tobias, Cassie, and Ax. Tobias and Cassie were flapping madly, dragging Ax�s tattered bird body along the grass. They would almost get off the ground, then slip back. The dog was on them.

<Leave him!> I yelled.

<No way!> Tobias cried.

<Do it! Do it or you�re all dead!>

Tobias and Cassie released Ax�s body. They fluttered away and the dog ran straight to the injured Ax and snatched him up in his jaws.

�Keep! Keep, Achilles!� the dog handler yelled.

With my keen vision I saw the dog freeze his jaw. He held Ax but did not bite down.

<What do we do?> Cassie cried.

<Get out of here! Move! Move!> I yelled.

I caught a slight breeze and soared up and away. Armed men and more dogs encircled Ax.

Through the supposedly open window of the house, I saw other men running to surround Rachel.

Two of us captured. And I was to blame.

Eh, I don't know that he's entirely to blame, It's very Jake to be thinking that, though.

# ? Jan 27, 2021 04:57

Ytlaya: Nov 13, 2005

Epicurius posted:

The books are good about that. I do think Jake's characterization suffers, though, because its hard to get a clear idea what he's like other than the leader of the Animorphs. The rest of them have strong enough personalities that, if the Yeerks hadn't invaded, I could tell you what they're like. Jake, on the other hand, his strongest traits outside of his role in the Animorphs is that he likes sports and idolizes his brother.

Yeah, but I think this is kind of deliberate and speaks to the way he's influenced by the burden of being the leader - he basically can't be himself and have much in the way of honest one-on-one interactions with other characters, since he feels like all the burden of having to "manage the group" falls on him. The rest of the team has the "freedom" to experience their own emotions/opinions towards the things they're doing because they can rely on Jake to make the decisions and carry the responsibility for their outcomes. Like in a non-Jake book it's usually about the character in question talking about their experience doing whatever the mission is and how they feel about it, while Jake is constantly occupied with making choices and managing the rest of the group.

Even when he jokes with Marco, it always feels kind of forced, like he's trying to play-act normalcy or something (which we basically see to an exaggerated extent in this book where he's basically traumatized after the fly thing).

# ? Jan 27, 2021 05:24

freebooter: Jul 7, 2009

quote:

<Leave him!> I yelled.

<No way!> Tobias cried.

<Do it! Do it or you�re all dead!>

Goddamn. Is that the coldest leadership decision so far?

# ? Jan 27, 2021 05:45

Shishkahuben: Mar 5, 2009

quote:

<Jake, do it! Do it now! Right now! Become human.>

Human?

Sure. Why not?

Jake has this reaction somewhat frequently, doesn't he? Off the top of my head I remember one of the last books in the series where a controller shoots him point-blank in the head with a handgun and miraculously doesn't kill him instantly, but Marco is screaming at him to demorph. His reaction is more or less the same. <Demorph? Oh, yeah... Yeah, right.>

# ? Jan 27, 2021 20:48

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Shishkahuben posted:

Jake has this reaction somewhat frequently, doesn't he? Off the top of my head I remember one of the last books in the series where a controller shoots him point-blank in the head with a handgun and miraculously doesn't kill him instantly, but Marco is screaming at him to demorph. His reaction is more or less the same. <Demorph? Oh, yeah... Yeah, right.>

I think the idea is that the trauma left him in shock and disassociating. So he can follow orders if he's given them, but he doesn't have the initiative to come up with it himself.

# ? Jan 27, 2021 21:20

Homora Gaykemi: Apr 30, 2020; by Fluffdaddy

quote:

�No way,� Marco said. �That guy hangs out in chat rooms? If I were him, I�d spend my day rolling around in big stacks of hundred-dollar bills, paying Michael Jordan to come over and teach me how to improve my three-point shot -�

i have bad news for Marco about how it turns out billionaires really spend their time once Twitter is invented

# ? Jan 28, 2021 05:08

freebooter: Jul 7, 2009

The thing that really stands out here (very end of series spoilers!) is that Marco genuinely does become a billionaire playboy with a sick-rear end mansion

# ? Jan 28, 2021 05:13

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Animorphs-Book 16:The Warning-Chapter 17

quote:

We joined up, those of us who were left, on the roof of a Wendy�s a quarter mile away. We hid there behind rooftop air conditioners and exhaust fans, amid the smell of grease and the rippling heat.

<How long have we been in morph?> I asked.

 Marco yelled. <How am I supposed to know?>

<We could have gotten Ax out of there!> Tobias accused.

<They have Rachel and Ax,> Cassie said frantically. <We have to get them back!>

It was panic. No one thinking clearly.

I tried to focus. But the air conditioners were roaring. The stink of frying burgers and onions and ketchup was overpowering.

 I said. <We have an hour and a half.>

<To do what?> Tobias demanded. <That place is a fortress! Fences, dogs, and some kind of force field in the windows.>

<Controllers,> Marco said. <Fenestre is a Controller. It was a trap. Has to be. Who else would shoot at birds?>

<Rachel and Ax will have to demorph in less than an hour and a half or be trapped,> Cassie said. <An hour and a half. That�s how long we have. If they demorph surrounded by Controllers � I mean, they�ll know Rachel is human, which means they�ll figure out that we�re all human. All except Ax.>

 I said. Actually, it was worse than that. See, Rachel knew she couldn�t demorph where she could be seen by Controllers. If I knew Rachel, she�d rather be trapped forever in her eagle�s body than let the truth out. She knew that if the Yeerks ever learned we were humans, not some bunch of renegade Andalites, our days were numbered. In low numbers.

<Being trapped in eagle form may not be the worst thing facing Rachel,> Tobias said.

<Oh, yeah, you�d think that!> Marco sneered with savage sarcasm. <Maybe Rachel doesn�t want to spend the rest of her life eating mice and living in trees like you, Tobias.>

<That�s not what I meant,> Tobias snapped back. 

<Ax was alive, I�m sure of that,> Cassie said, a bit calmer than the other two.

<Didn�t any of this show up when you researched this lunatic�s mansion?> Marco demanded of me.

I didn�t answer. I had to think. Time was running out. Tobias and Marco were at each other�s throats. Cassie was starting to moan about how they�d find her parents, sooner or later. How once they had Rachel it was only a matter of time.

I had to make a plan. But who was I to be making plans? I�d led everyone into a disaster. Rachel � Ax � all of us, maybe.

 It came out as a sob. I hadn�t planned it. Hadn�t meant to say it.

<What?> Tobias said.

<Ticktock, ticktock,> Marco said angrily. <We need a plan. Time is running out!>

 I yelled.

<Don�t give me that,> Marco shouted in my head. <You got us into this, now get us out!>

<Leave him alone,> Cassie said, coming to my defense.

But Marco�s words had been spears aimed right at my heart. And Cassie defending me just made things worse.

My mind was split in two. Part of it was racing like an Indy car whose engine is ready to explode. Another part of it was swimming through molasses, stuck on the awful fact that Marco was right. I had failed my friends.

<We � we could use cockroach morphs,> Cassie said. <Crawl into the mansion and ->

<No time,> Marco said. <We�d have to morph way outside the outer fence, then get all the way up the hill, hundreds of yards. Besides, they�re Controllers in there. They�ll be ready for us now.>

<No,> I said suddenly.

<No, what?> Tobias said.

<They aren�t Controllers,> I said, suddenly absolutely sure. <Any time we�ve ever gone after the Yeerks they may have used a lot of human-Controllers. But backing them up were always Hork-Bajir. No Hork-Bajir. And everyone used guns. Plain old, everyday guns. And dogs. The Yeerks wouldn�t use dogs.>

<What kind of a human being would tell his guards to shoot birds?> Marco demanded.



<They still have guns,> Cassie pointed out. <They may not have Dracon beams or squadrons of Hork-Bajir, but they still have guns and fences and dogs and probably some big, thick doors.>

<Yeah, they do,> I agreed. <And we don�t have any morphs between us that are fast enough, and tough enough to bust into that place without getting shot up. But I have an idea. How far are we from The Gardens?>

I mean, stuff has gone wrong and they're panicking, especially Jake, who knows he's over his head.

Chapter 18

quote:

I flew as fast as my falcon body could carry me, which was pretty fast. But the wind was against me. I tried to tell myself it would all work out because on the way back the wind would be with me. But who can tell with the wind?

I left Marco and Cassie behind to keep an eye on things. I gave them instructions to do nothing. I didn�t want us to get back and find they were captured, too.

But who was I to be giving anyone orders? I�d led my friends into a trap. A trap I might have expected if I�d taken the time to do some research. But no, I�d spent the night wasting time with my family.

See, that''s also sad that he's thinking that. It's his guilt speaking.

quote:

Cassie had been right all along. We should have tried to save Gump. That would have been the easy thing to do. Instead I had to try and play the big general and decide to go after Fenestre, even without any preparation.

Tobias flew with me to The Gardens. I wanted to be alone, really, but Tobias is a hundred times more experienced than any of us in the air. He knew the winds and clouds and thermals. He could help me fly faster.

We�d had less than an hour and a half. By the time we were flying above the animal habitats of The Gardens, we would have less than an hour. Half an hour to get back. That left half an hour to do what I had come to do, and to rescue Rachel and Ax back at the mansion. There was no time to waste.

<Are you going to tell me what we�re here for?> Tobias grumbled.

<Right down there,> I said.

Below us was an outdoor habitat of mixed grasses, a muddy wallow, and a water hole. Four shapes were visible in the habitat. Four large shapes that looked like fugitives from the age of dinosaurs.

<Rhinos?> Tobias asked incredulously.

<Yeah. I need a morph that can go straight through those fences, through the doors, and take a couple of bullets if need be. You have a better idea?>

<Nope. Not me. But how are you going to get close enough to acquire one of those things?>

<Two of the rhinos are off at the far end of the habitat. The crowds may not able to see them all that well.>

<You�re just going to go right in?>

<There�s no time for anything else.>

<Oh, man. Look, at least let me provide a distraction>

I hesitated. Tobias was waiting for me to say yes or no. What if I was wrong? Again? Still, I could use a distraction. <Yeah, okay. But don�t get hurt. You hear? Do not get hurt.>

Tobias peeled off and I floated down, down, like going down a spiral staircase. I aimed right for the broad back of the biggest rhinoceros. I flared my wings, reached out with my talons, and landed as gently as I could.

The big beast barely twitched.

I stood there, balanced on his back, my talons holding lightly to the thick old gray leather. So far, so good. But you can�t acquire new DNA when you�re in a morph. I had to be human to do it. And that was going to be tricky.

I looked off toward the high railing where people were watching the rhinos meander. With my falcon vision, they seemed shockingly close. I could see the color of their eyes. I could see a loose button on one guy�s shirt. Of course, they only had human eyes. They couldn�t see nearly as well as I
could.

It doesn�t matter, I told myself grimly. No time to worry. Do it.

I began to demorph. On the rhino�s back. My falcon feathers began to melt and run together, confusing their neat geometric patterns. My talons grew less sharp, thicker, clumsier, with extra toes beginning to grow. I heard a deep, internal grinding sound as my human bones began to stretch out of
the hollow bird bones.

I was already twice as heavy on the rhinoceros�s back. Would he throw me off and trample me?

No time to worry. Would the people notice what was happening? No time to worry. I had to trust Tobias.

And that�s when I saw him swoop down from the sky and snatch a cotton candy from a little girl�s hand as easily as he snatched mice from the grass.

Swooop! And off he went with the bright pink fluff ball. The girl yelled, the people around all gaped and laughed and pointed. Tobias began to put on an aerial display worthy of the Blue Angels at an air show.

No one was watching me as my lumpy human shape emerged from the sleek falcon�s body. But I was still on the back of the rhino. On the back of a two-thousand-pound behemoth with a three-footlong horn.

The rhino moved! But he was just ambling over to greener grass.

I continued to demorph. Then, all of a sudden, the rhino noticed.

�Ffmraha!� he snorted. He broke into a trot. I had no hands yet. No talons anymore, either. I rolled off and lay face down in the dust.

Come on, Jake, morph!

The rhinoceros towered above me. It was like lying down on the ground beside a truck. He blinked one eye at me. And then he lowered his massive horn.
Sniff. Sniff.

That face, that horn, hovered inches from me, as the rhinoceros sniffed me and I prayed he wouldn�t impale me. He was growing more agitated. He was upset by what he was watching. No surprise. It would have upset me, too, watching a boy squirm and mutate his way out of a bird.

And then I had a hand. I stuck it out, half-blind, and touched the horn. I wrapped my stillemerging fingers halfway round it, and I focused with all my mind.

When you acquire animals, they go into a sort of trance. Except sometimes they don�t. And if this was one of those times, the rhino would trample me and use me for target practice with his horn.

I focused on the beast. I focused and felt him become a part of me.

So, isn't morphing supposed to be exhausting? That's a big part of the reason they can't usually switch back and forth from morph to morph quickly? It seems really, I dunno, fortunate of Jake here.

# ? Jan 28, 2021 05:58

freebooter: Jul 7, 2009

You can push through exhaustion with adrenaline, I guess. I remember this book mostly for its extremely dated internet chat room, but this is actually a really impressively tense, serious situation that I'd forgotten all about.

(Minor quibble here is that it would make way more sense for Tobias to acquire the rhino but hey, it's a Jake book).

# ? Jan 28, 2021 06:37

Gun Jam: Apr 11, 2015

quote:

<Yeah. I need a morph that can go straight through those fences, through the doors, and take a couple of bullets if need be. You have a better idea?>

Elephant?
(of course, Rachel got dibs on the elephant, so he can't do that. Gotta be new!)

# ? Jan 28, 2021 09:06

disaster pastor: May 1, 2007

Gun Jam posted:

Elephant?
(of course, Rachel got dibs on the elephant, so he can't do that. Gotta be new!)

If you're feeling charitable, you could assume that the elephant exhibit is a lot more exposed and more popular, and they had a better shot with the rhino. Rachel acquired her elephant through the employee entrance, after all.

(but, yes, the real reason is almost certainly that the big morph Jake gets for the climax of this book can't be one we've seen before)

# ? Jan 28, 2021 14:24

feetnotes: Jan 29, 2008

Yeah, they constantly talk about how morphing several times in a row makes you exhausted, but they are also consistently doing it and just fighting through the exhaustion.

They seem to do that a lot with the rules of morphing - establish a rule which is mostly consistent, but then show it actually can be broken. But then keep having the animorphs obey the rule as if it�s ironclad.

You can�t morph rapidly or you�ll be too exhausted! Well actually, you can just push through.

Acquiring an animal puts them into a trance! Well, sometimes. No reason for why it sometimes doesn�t.

Morphing just reconfigures your mass and puts the rest into z space! Well, except when you morph something bigger than yourself, or if you�re allergic to alligators so you pop one out of your own body, in which case the extra mass comes from ????

You can�t morph from one animal to another without turning back into a human! Well, again, except if you have the alligator allergy thing.

If you�re trapped in a morph you can never morph or regain your old body again! Well, unless a magic space wizard does it. (Fair enough on this one I guess)

And from upcoming books...

If you stay in morph for two hours you�ll be trapped! Well, except for the couple of times they accidentally go beyond the deadline by a bit but can still morph back because they try really hard.

You can�t mix animal dna to make a chimera morph! Well, unless you�re really stressed out. And not just like, the amount of stress you get from fighting a losing guerilla war of attrition against an advanced alien species while they take over the planet, including your loved ones, but no one except your enemies knows about it. More stress than that.

Morphing just changes your body�s mass into another form - it doesn�t create new living beings! Well except if you morph into a starfish and then get cut in half, and then demorph. Then there will be two of you... and they�ll split elements of your personality in between them.

You can definitely come up with plausible explanations for some of these if you�re willing to speculate beyond what�s written. It�s just kind of funny, and you�d figure as the war goes on and they get increasingly desperate they might try to figure out a way to game the system to gain some kind of advantage.

But, they are young kids, and andalite tech is pretty far advanced beyond what even the smartest humans could figure out, and most importantly, it�s clear they usually break the rules only to set up an interesting premise for the adventure of the month.

# ? Jan 28, 2021 16:29

Bobulus: Jan 28, 2007

How long, have Andalites had morphing technology? Obviously at least a few decades, per the Andalite Chronicles. But I'm not clear on if it's a technology they've been tinkering with or one they consider 'solved'. It seems like a lot of the rules of morphing are a side-effect of not perfecting the technology yet. If the two-hour time-limit being a bit muddy or not calming the animal during Aquiring are 'glitches', it would make sense that they're not really common knowledge, even among the Andalites.

# ? Jan 28, 2021 18:49

disaster pastor: May 1, 2007

It always made sense to me that it wasn't exactly two hours, because there's no reason it would naturally line up like that. If it's actually two hours and seven or so minutes, it makes sense for Elfangor to round it down and say "remember two hours." Especially since, like we saw in book 3, if you're right up against that deadline, it's much more difficult to make the morph actually happen.

# ? Jan 28, 2021 20:00

wizzardstaff: Apr 6, 2018; Zorch! Splat! Pow!

^^^ this, but I am also amused at the thought of Andalite engineers being unable to design the morphing process so that it conveniently lines up with any of their native time units, but as soon as Elfangor lands on Earth he's like "oh sweet, what a cool coincidence".

# ? Jan 28, 2021 20:11

Grammarchist: Jan 28, 2013

I want more Ax commenting on human culture. A post-war Ax with an online blog reviewing Shaggydog would be kinda hilarious.

# ? Jan 28, 2021 22:25

wizzardstaff: Apr 6, 2018; Zorch! Splat! Pow!

Imagine Ax with a youtube channel doing reaction videos where he eats and reviews human food.

Don't let him get wind of the tide pod challenge

# ? Jan 28, 2021 22:43

FlocksOfMice: Feb 3, 2009

it's fine, he could morph out before it got bad!

# ? Jan 28, 2021 22:45

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Animorphs-Book 16:The Warning-Chapter 19

quote:

We raced back from The Gardens. I was exhausted. Tobias was exhausted. We had no choice. Time was running out.

The wind had shifted. It wasn�t in our faces, but it was strong from the south and we were flying west. We kept having to fight our way back on course.

Marco and Cassie were waiting in the trees across the road from Fenestre�s front gate. Their time in morph was short, too. As short as Rachel�s and Ax�s time.

<Marco! Cassie!> I yelled down. <Anything happen?>

<Yeah, the clock kept ticking,> Marco said.

<We noticed one thing,> Cassie said. <Thank goodness for these eyes. We saw you were right not to try and sneak inside in some kind of insect morph. There�s a band of poison around each door. And some kind of bug zapper in the windows. That must be what shocked Rachel. I think Mr. Fenestre
has some psychological problems.>

<He can afford them,> Marco said. <Now what are we doing to get Rachel and Ax out of there?>

<I�m going to knock down the fences, kick in the door, and stomp anything or anyone that gets in my way,> I said.

<Cool.> Marco laughed with a touch of his now-strained humor. <Rachel would approve. But how?>

I landed on the ground at the base of the tree. <You guys get ready. I�m hoping Mr. Fenestre built that place with high ceilings and wide hallways>

I demorphed as quickly as I could. I stayed in human form for only a few seconds, then focused my thoughts on the rhinoceros.

It is unbelievably tiring to morph rapidly like that. You feel like your body is running on one half-dead double-A battery. But I could be tired later, not now.

The first change was my skin. It went from delicate human of the pink variety, to something like inch-thick leather that�s been out in the sun for ten years. It thickened and rippled all over. I was still human, but gray and massive. It was like wearing living armor.

My legs thickened and shortened. My fingers withered away. Only the fingernails remained and they became hard and big as irons. I fell forward onto all fours, a growing mass of gray, like molten steel bubbling and reforming.

I felt my ears crawl up the side of my head. They elongated, then curled to form open tubes.

And then, last of all, my face. My entire face simply began to stretch. Out and out and out. The bones of my face and skull grew, multiplied, thickened. It was as if some busy crew of engineers were rebuilding my face, always saying, �We need more here, more support there, more armor, more strength.�

My head was gigantic!

<What the � what are you morphing?!> Marco asked.

And then, growing from the far end of my monstrously big head, the horns began to emerge.

A smaller one toward the back that grew, then stopped. And the larger horn. The one that grew and grew and grew. My eyesight was dim and badly focused, but I could see the horn sprout. Up and up it went. Thicker, larger, longer.

<Oh,> Marco said. <That�s what you�re morphing.>

<How much time?> I asked.

<Maybe ten minutes,> Tobias said.

I felt the rhino�s mind emerge beneath my own human consciousness. It was not what I�d expected. This mind was not violent. In fact, the dominant instinct seemed to be simple hunger. The rhino wanted to graze.

But beneath that placid herbivore consciousness there was something else. Not aggression, but defensiveness. Not fear, but concern. The rhino had to be careful, lest it was challenged by another rhinoceros.

The incredibly dim and almost useless eyes searched for a shape vaguely like its own. The ears twisted and turned, aiming at each new sound, looking for the sounds of another rhino. The excellent nose sniffed the air.

No challengers. No enemies. Just some birds. The rhino was calm.

I would have to supply the aggression. Which was fine, because I had plenty. I had to save Rachel and Ax. And I had to do it right now.

<Okay, you guys stay with me, but stay back. Wait till I�ve cleared away defenses before you advance. Now, let�s see what this horn can do.>

Ok, so we've got a rhino on scene. Also, again, the morphing exhausts you....sometimes.

Chapter 20

quote:

My new body moved surprisingly well. I felt almost like I was tiptoeing. But I was a tiptoeing giant.

I trotted out from beneath the cover of the trees. I knew the gate of Fenestre�s compound was right across the street. But I could not see the gate. I couldn�t see anything beyond maybe thirty yards, and then, only if it moved. In order to see, I had to look first with one eye, then the other, because the two eyes were too far apart, with too much massive jaw and snout and horn separating them. It was like having your eyes in different rooms.

<You guys will have to aim me,> I said.

<A little left,> Marco said. <That�s it. Now, forward!>

I trotted. I broke into a run. I felt hard pavement beneath my surprisingly sensitive feet.

<Gate!> Marco yelled.

I lowered my horn. I increased my speed. The gate was metal bars. I saw them clearly about two seconds before I hit them.

More than two thousand pounds of rhino hit tempered steel.

WHAM!

I felt the impact in my massive, bony face and back into my shoulders. It was like getting hit in the face with a sledgehammer! But it was like getting hit and not caring. I felt the impact. But my rhinoceros body was used to impact. It was built for impact.

<What happened to the gate?> I asked, too blind to be sure.

<What gate?> Marco said. <Okay, now straight on, veering slightly right, big guy!>

I trotted on my four Greek column legs. I felt the twisted remains of the gate as I ran across them.

ScrrrEEEET! ScrrrEEEET!

<Man, does this guy have a lot of different alarms, or what?> Tobias said.

<Okay, fence number two,> Marco announced.

I kept running. This time it was just chain link. I felt something sort of tug at my horn.

<Where�s the fence?> I asked.

<You just went through it,> Cassie said.

<All right. This may work,> Marco said.

�Rowrrrowrrrowrr!� I heard the dogs very clearly. Smelled them even more clearly.

<Doggies!> Tobias warned.

I caught a vague glimpse of two dark shapes hurtling through the air toward me. I think maybe they tried to bite me. I�m not sure. I did feel a sort of scraping sensation on one side.

�Yow! Yow! Yow! Yowyowyowyow!�

<What happened to the dogs?> I asked.

<Doggies go bye-bye,> Marco said with a laugh. <The doggies are hauling doggie butt.>

 I said. <What�s next?>

<Final fence, then the door.>

<Look out! Guards! The guys with the shotguns.>

�Holy crap!� I heard someone yell. �What is that?�

�Shoot it!�

I spotted them moving. It was like watching a very old, very fuzzy black-and-white movie on a bad TV. They were shadows, ghosts moving swiftly against a blurry background. Just enough for me to see.

I turned toward them, all rhino instinct now. They were possible danger. They were challenging
me. That was a mistake.

BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!

Rhinos get shot at all the time. Unfortunately, there are people stupid enough to think rhino horn is a medicine, and people creepy enough to slaughter endangered rhinos to get it.

But they don�t go hunting rhinoceros with shotguns. You want to shoot a rhino, you need a highpower, high-caliber rifle. Not a shotgun that fires a bunch of small pellets.

BLAM! BLAM!

I felt something sting my face and shoulders. It made me mad. I charged. Not a trot, an out-and out run, with head down and horn out.

�Run!�

They ran. I ran after them. It took about three seconds for me to catch the first one. I plowed right into him, felt the contact with his soft, mushy body, tossed my head, and �

� Let�s just say that particular man won�t be sitting down for a long, long time.

I had lost the other guard. But that was okay. They weren�t my goal.

<Get me to the door!> I yelled to the others.

<Left � okay, now right � okay now � jeez, what are you, blind? Left, right, okay, CHARGE!>

I charged.

WHAMMMM!

I felt like I�d hit a truck. I backed up and slammed forward again.

WHAMMMM! Crunch.

<Man, that was a tough door!> I said.

<Um, Jake? You missed the door. That was the wall. You okay?> Cassie asked.

<I�m fine. One more push and we�ll be in.> I reared back and slammed forward. I felt scraping along my back. Then I was in much cooler air.

<We�re inside, aren�t we?> I asked.

<Yes,> Tobias answered, sounding tense. <And we are out of time.>

I mean, you have to admit, that was effective.

# ? Jan 29, 2021 04:31

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

FlocksOfMice posted:

it's fine, he could morph out before it got bad!

The cinnamon challenge, on the other hand, maybe not. :v:

# ? Jan 29, 2021 14:09

Skypie: Sep 28, 2008

wizzardstaff posted:

^^^ this, but I am also amused at the thought of Andalite engineers being unable to design the morphing process so that it conveniently lines up with any of their native time units, but as soon as Elfangor lands on Earth he's like "oh sweet, what a cool coincidence".

Given how much the Ellimist is messing with things, it's entirely possible he guided the design process specifically so the Animorphs would have an easily-understood time frame to operate in when their time comes

# ? Jan 29, 2021 18:41

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Animorphs-Book 16:The Warning-Chapter 21

quote:

I�m sure it was a beautiful house. But I didn�t really see it. All I saw with my dim rhino-vision were walls and doorways. But at least we�d been right to guess that there were wide hallways. Wide enough for me to barrel down like a � well, like a rhinoceros.

And the ceilings were high enough that Tobias, Cassie, and Marco could fly down them, searching madly from room to room. Searching with vision greater than human vision and hearing that could pick up the sound of a gopher belching from a distance the length of a football field.

They used me to open doors.

<Jake, open this door,> Marco would say. I�d turn where he showed me, shove my massive bony face forward, and the door would explode in splinters.

Crrrr-UNCH-Bang!

<We are trashing this man�s home,> Cassie said. 

<He can afford to have his doors fixed,> Marco said.

<That�s not the point,> Cassie said. Then, <Jake, open this door, please.>

Crrrr-UNCH-bang!

<Nothing,> Tobias complained. <Nothing, nothing, nothing! Nothing in any of these rooms, and there may be a hundred rooms in this place.>

<Tobias is right. We are out of time,> Cassie said.

<This isn�t the way to do it,> I said. <We can�t just search room-to-room. It could take hours. We need to figure this out. How do we find Ax and Rachel? Where would they be?>

<In the last place we look,> Marco grumbled. <Or at least � wait a minute! Wherever they are, they�ll be guarded.>

<Yes!> I said. <Of course. We just rampage till we see something well guarded.>

<I�ll head upstairs,> Tobias said.

He zoomed away and up a large staircase. I lumbered along into a vast open living room area. I stomped on through. I tried not to crush too much furniture, but I was big and half-blind, so I kept hearing the crunch of wood and the shatter of glass and pottery in my wake.

<Up here!> Tobias yelled.

Then, not as loud as before, but still loud enough � BLAM! BLAM!

<Tobias!>

<I�m okay! But I found an area with two big guys with big guns. It�s upstairs.>

I tried to turn around and head back to the stairs, but then Marco yelled.

<Uh-oh! Guys coming up behind us. Man, how many gunmen does this lunatic hire? Jake, we have to go through these guys to get back to the stairs!>

 Tobias yelled down from upstairs.

I spun around and wiped out a couch in the process. <This way?!>

<No, a little left!>

I turned and annihilated a coffee table. Then I charged. I couldn�t tell the difference between the men and various pole lamps and bookcases, except when they moved. The blur drew my eye, and I smelled humans.

So, do rhinos actually have bad vision? We don't know. Conventional wisdom says yes. Some recent studies, though, say that they should have better vision than most people think.

quote:

I lowered my head and charged.

Shotgun pellets stung but didn�t penetrate beneath my outer skin.

POP! POP! POP! POP!

I was hit. I staggered. I felt the bullet from the handgun tear into my right shoulder. A second slug lodged in the bone of my face.

I hit the guy with the gun. I was mad. I lowered my horn and I tossed my head back. He went flying back over my shoulder.

�Ya-ah-AHHHHHH!�

The other man jumped aside. I think he was fumbling to reload his shotgun. I sideswiped him and knocked him into the wall. Then I was out of the room, back into the hallway, tearing along back to the staircase.

I was bleeding. And I was weakening on my right side. My right front leg was moving slower.

The bullet in my face must have ricocheted off. I felt pain there, but not the heaviness I felt in my shoulder.

I came to the stairs and tried to charge straight up. But rhinos were never meant for climbing stairs. My legs wouldn�t lift high enough. My weight and momentum were too much. The wooden stairs splintered.

BLAM! BLAM!

<Tobias! What�s going on up there?>

<I�m leading these guys around in circles and they�re blowing the crap out the wall and ceiling trying to shoot me.>



A bird trapped in a house, being chased by two guys with shotguns. Had I just sentenced Tobias to death?

I started to demorph as fast as I could. But while my thought-speak was still functioning,

something occurred to me. <Rachel! Ax! Can you guys hear me? Rachel! Ax!>

<� unh � what?>

<Who is that?>

<� unh � it is me, Aximili,> Ax said.

He sounded dazed. I wasn�t surprised. <Ax! Demorph! Time�s up!>

<But there are humans here watching me, Prince Jake.>

Another decision. <Just do it, Ax, we�re coming for you! Do you -> My thought-speak went dead as I became more human than rhinoceros.

<Yes, Prince Ja -> Ax fell silent.

I was shrinking. My armored flesh became tender human skin. My face was flat and delicate. But my legs could handle stairs. I still heard the sounds of gunfire from upstairs. And the sad thing was, I was glad. As long as they were still shooting, it meant Tobias wasn�t dead yet.

Marco and Cassie were just becoming human again. They were three-foot-tall lumps of feathers and shrinking beaks and emerging skin.

One wrong move and Tobias was gone. Ax might be demorphing in front of people who might be Controllers. Rachel � no one knew whether Rachel was even conscious and capable of demorphing.

Or alive at all. And now the three of us were utterly vulnerable, weak, pathetic.

I just kept thinking: This wasn�t even supposed to be a very dangerous mission. And now, we were as close to being wiped out as we�d ever been.

�Cshom on!� I said, slurring my words with a mouth that was not yet human. �No chime kleft!�

I started up the stairs, staggering on my shifting, changing legs. The joints weren�t right. The toes weren�t toes, and my ankles seemed to have no flexibility. But time was up. I dragged myself up those stairs, hoping desperately that I had not killed us all.

So all sorts of things have gone wrong.

Chapter 22

quote:

I was human by the time I had reached the top of the stairs. But human isn�t a great morph when you�re thinking about going against guys with guns.

As I ran I saw, to my horror, something emerge from the flesh of my shoulder. About as big as a fingertip, smashed, the color of mud. It was the bullet that had lodged in my shoulder. By good luck it had ended up outside my body as it morphed into a smaller form.

The bullet dropped to the carpet.

A hawk zipped by overhead, scraping the walls with its wings. A loose feather drifted down.

<What are you guys doing, looking like that?> Tobias demanded.

�Are they still after you?�

<Yeah, but I lost them temporarily. The room they were guarding is down the hall, then through this big, massive bedroom. You�ll see a doorway. Last time I went past, there were still a couple of guys guarding it.>
�What do we do?� Marco asked.

I swear, I almost punched him. If one more person asked me what to do �

�Morph again. Combat mode. Tobias? Try and reach Rachel and Ax with thought-speak. If you get Rachel, tell her to demorph right now, no arguing. If you get Ax, tell him to -�

 Tobias interrupted. <Into that side room! It�s unlocked. I�ll lead them away!>

Marco, Cassie, and I all dodged into the side room. I heard the sound of heavy, weary feet tramping by.

�Where is that lousy bird?�

�What I can�t figure is why we�re chasing it and blowing holes in the walls and ceiling.�

��Cause we want to keep our jobs, that�s why,� the first man muttered.

By the time they were gone, I was in tiger morph. The rhino was great for busting things down. But I wanted eyes and ears and reflexes to go along with my power. And nothing I�d ever morphed could do as much damage as the tiger.

Cassie had morphed a wolf, Marco a gorilla. In a fight they were our standard morphs.

<Rachel!> I yelled, as soon as my thought-speak was back. <Rachel! If you can hear me, demorph! Demorph now!> To Marco and Cassie I said, <Come on! Let�s do this!>

Marco opened the door with his almost-human fingers and we ran. Down the hall, through a bedroom that I swear, without exaggeration, was as big as a basketball court, and up to the doorway, where two very scared-looking guys stood cradling weapons.

One carried a shotgun. The other a small submachine gun. They were thirty feet away. For a frozen moment, no one moved.

I could cover thirty feet in two seconds.

In those same two seconds, the guy with the machine gun could fire ten rounds. He could easily kill me. If he failed, the force of my leap, my desperate need to defend myself, would ensure that he died.

It was time to gamble. <Look, you two men �>

They stared at me like they were going nuts. They could guess that it was me they were hearing in their heads. But they had never even imagined talking to a tiger before.

Then again, they�d never expected to be face-to-face with a small, angry zoo, either.

<Yes, it�s me, the tiger. Don�t worry about how or why. Here�s all you need to know: I don�t want to hurt you. But I have to go past you. You may shoot me, but you won�t kill me fast enough to keep me from taking you down. See this paw?>

I lifted one paw. My tiger paws are about as big around as a frying pan. I extended the cruel, yellowed claws.

<With this paw, I can literally knock your heads from your shoulders and send them rolling like bowling balls. Now, I don�t know what you�re getting paid for this job ->

�Not enough,� said the man with the machine gun. �I can�t believe I�m talking to animals. But that tiger makes sense.�

�We�re not getting paid nearly enough,� his partner agreed. �We put down our weapons and walk away. Agreed, Mr. Tiger?�

<Agreed. Cassie? Keep an eye on them.>

Cassie trained her acute wolf senses on the men. If they had even thought about trying anything tricky, she�d have known it before they did.

<Marco? Now it�s your turn to open a door. Open that door.>

Marco raised his huge gorilla arms back over his head, preparing to swing them down with shattering force.

<Marco? Try the knob first.>

<Oh.>

He opened the door. And I leaped through.

When a tiger wants to deescalate, you deescalate.

Epicurius fucked around with this message at 05:50 on Jan 30, 2021

# ? Jan 30, 2021 05:01

wizzardstaff: Apr 6, 2018; Zorch! Splat! Pow!

For all the dated cheesiness of the opening act, this book has turned into quite a tense action blockbuster.

# ? Jan 30, 2021 05:10

FlocksOfMice: Feb 3, 2009

All I remember of this one was the chatroom and how it was neat to see that represented mostly faithfully in a book. I had, uh, wow, forgotten how DIRE this is. I love that it is expressly a throw-away filler episode and they nearly loving get totally wiped and they're AWARE of that.

# ? Jan 30, 2021 07:33

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Animorphs-Book 16:The Warning-Chapter 23

quote:

I bounded into the room. It was dark, but my tiger�s eyes could see through the gloom as easily as if it had been lit with stadium lights.

There seemed to be a sky overhead. Green, mostly, with vivid flashes of lightning. Scruffy plants grew from what seemed to be soil beneath my feet. And in the center of the room, perhaps fifteen feet across, was a shallow pond of liquid the color and consistency of molten lead.

If you remember from the Andalite Chronicles, this is what the Yeerk homeworld looks like.

quote:

There were two cages beside the pool. Ax was in one. He was halfway between his northern harrier morph and his own Andalite body. He was frozen stiff. Unmoving. Not even breathing, like some nightmare statue composed of gray feathers and a scorpion tail and talons and a mouth-less face. In the other cage was Rachel. Still a bald eagle.

My tiger eyes were very good. My tiger ears were good, too. I heard no heartbeat from her. I saw no slight movement of her chest rising and falling with breathing.

I felt my heart stop beating for several long seconds. Dead. Both dead. I�d been too late. There was a man there, too. I recognized the face. Joe Bob Fenestre, the second richest man on earth. Head of Web Access America.

I recognized what he had in his hand, too: a Yeerk Dracon beam. He was not pointing it at me.

He was pointing it at Ax.

Wrong again, Jake. This man was a Controller. Had to be.

Marco and Cassie came in behind me. After a few moments Tobias joined us. But Fenestre just kept staring at me.

At last he spoke. �So. Not Yeerks, after all. I�m to be destroyed by Andalites. Well, I suppose there is some honor in that, at least.�

<Let my friends go,> I said harshly.

He shrugged, �You can take them. I don�t care. Killing Andalites is not my life anymore.�

<Yeah? My friends look dead,> I said.

He frowned. �Nonsense. Don�t you recognize bio-stasis when you see it? They are simply frozen in time. I thought you Andalites were supposed to be so advanced when it comes to technology.�

My heart quickened. Bio-stasis? What was that?

<Get them out of there,> I said.

�Or what?� he mocked. �You�ll kill me? You�ll kill me anyway.�

I was panting. My mind was racing madly. What game was this man playing? How could I win?

<Why would I kill you?>

�I�m a Yeerk,� he said. �A Controller. Although my host and I are on very good terms. I made him rich. I wrote his famous Web browser. We�ve been partners all these years.�

<Yeerks don�t have partners,> I said.

He laughed. �No,� he drawled, �we don�t.� He looked at me with a sharp, shrewd look. �Who sent you after me? Have you made some kind of deal with my brother?�

<Your brother?>

�You are obviously Andalites,� he said patiently. �No one else has your amazing morphing technology. But I have to ask myself, why would Andalites go to so much trouble to kill me? Me, of all Yeerks?�

I was totally confused. I hesitated.

<This is weird,> Marco said, sending me a private thought-speak message.

<This guy is cornered,> Cassie said. <He thinks he�s toast. You can see it in his eyes. We need to find out more.>

I paced a little. Tigers get restless just standing. Should I take a chance? Should I tell him at least some of the truth?

<We traced you here from the Web page. The one about Yeerks.>

He nodded. �Yes, but why come after � ?� His face lit up. �Of course! You were looking for allies! You weren�t sure, were you? You thought perhaps it was all real, that humans were forming a resistance to the Yeerk invasion of their planet! You came here to see if I was for you, or against you!�

Then he began to laugh. He laughed in that sick way people do when they�re laughing but nothing is funny.

�Shall I tell you who and what I am, Andalite? Shall I?�

I didn�t answer. I waited.

�My Yeerk designation is Esplin-Nine-Four-Double-Six. Note the �double six.� Do you know what it means?�

<No.>

�A �double� designation means that I am a twin. That two Yeerks grew from the same grub. When there are twins, one is considered the prime, and one the lesser. I am the lesser. My brother, my twin, is the prime. To him go the best assignments, the best hosts, the rank, the power, the glory. And to me, only what I can take.�

He made a fist on the word �take.�

�In some cases, brothers can share. In some cases, twins can even become allies. But not with my brother. My brother is power mad. Or maybe just mad now. He left me nothing. He assigned me to a poor, unimportant human host. This Joe Bob Fenestre, a lowly programmer working in the bowels of a telephone company.

�Well, that wasn�t good enough. I wanted more. And if I couldn�t have it as a Yeerk, I�d have it as a human. I ended up making an alliance with my host. We were two of a kind. Two losers in the shadow of our betters. I used Yeerk technical knowledge to make Fenestre rich. And in the process, I created Web Access America, which made me the greatest source of information on humans there was. I knew secrets my brother could only guess at.�

<You sift E-mail. You spy on chat rooms.>

�You know human computer terminology,� he said.

I swallowed hard. I�d been careless. I had sounded �human.� Bluff it out. <We Andalites are a small, hunted band on this planet. Knowledge is survival>

He seemed satisfied with that.

�I became an invaluable asset to the invasion. All by myself I had become a powerful human with vast information. But of course, my brother couldn�t tolerate that. He had me declared a traitor. He cut me off from the Kandrona. He would have killed me. For the crime of being as great as he, he�d have murdered me.�

Joe Bob Fenestre�s eyes bored into me. And I felt a chill of premonition. See, right then I knew who this twin brother was. Who he had to be.

<Oh, my God,> Cassie whispered. She�d guessed, too.

�Yes, only one twin can be great,� Fenestre said bitterly. �Only one of us could be the mighty Visser Three.�

Surprise!

Jake's doing a pretty good job pretending to be an Andalite here. And, I suppose, Fenestre is trying to keep talking to stay alive. We'll find out more about Yeerk reproduction later in the books.

Chapter 24

quote:

We first encountered Visser Three within minutes of finding the Andalite prince, Elfangor.

Visser Three showed up and murdered the helpless Elfangor. Since that time we have fought him many times. He is the only Yeerk in all the universe ever to have successfully taken over an Andalite body, long ago in another war on another planet. When he took the Andalite body as a host, he acquired the Andalite�s ability to morph. He is the only morph-capable Yeerk.

And now I understood why his brother, this Yeerk living in the head of Joe Bob Fenestre, would instruct his men to shoot at birds and any other animal they saw. Any one of them might be Visser Three in morph.

�I gather, from your silence, that you know my brother,� Fenestre said.

<We have fought him,> I said simply.

�And yet, you�re still alive. Not many can say that. My compliments.�

<How do you survive without having access to the Yeerk pool? I see you have created a replica here in this room, but surely you haven�t managed to create your own Kandrona to supply the vital Kandrona rays.>

Fenestre nodded. �Well, well. So you know a Yeerk pool when you see one. And you know about the Kandrona.� He shrugged. �I have found a way to stay alive without a Kandrona. That�s not important. What�s important is � what now?�

<He�s lying,> Cassie whispered instantly. <Or at least he�s not telling the whole truth. The Kandrona. He doesn�t want to talk about that.>

I nodded my tiger head. It probably looked funny, such a human gesture coming from the huge cat.

<Your brother must know where you are. He could kill you anytime he wants. He could hit you from orbit and leave this place a big, smoky ruin.>

�No, no, that would be too noisy. Some idiot human with a camcorder could manage to record it.�

<He could send in Hork-Bajir. They�d cut through your guards just like we did. Or he could come himself. If he wanted to kill you, he would. He could. He hasn�t. So why not?>

Fenestre smiled a wintry smile. �Clever, clever Andalites. So good with your computers and your magnificent Dome ships. You still think you�re the lords of the galaxy, don�t you? We spread from planet to planet and you keep falling back. And yet your arrogance is so unbelievable you never pause to consider that maybe you�re not so clever, after all.�

<Cassie�s right,> Marco chimed in. <He�s weaseling. He�s trying to distract you.>

<Yeah, you�re both right,> I said. Then to Fenestre I said, <If you want to live, answer my questions. Answer me, and you�ll live. Lie �> I let the threat hang in the air.

Fenestre looked at me long and hard. �I suppose I�ll have to rely on Andalite honor,� he said in a mocking tone. �All right. My brother has not killed me because I have information he wants and needs. He doesn�t want me dead, he wants me in his torture chamber aboard his Blade ship. You see, I have found a way to survive without the Kandrona. And Visser Three would give anything to know how.�

Fenestre lowered the Dracon beam he�d been pointing at Ax. �There�s a way to process and refine Kandrona rays from another source. It can be made into an edible product. A food, so to speak, that I can consume with my human mouth and digest.�

I felt a cold chill. If that was true, there would be no stopping the Yeerks. Their reliance on Yeerk pools and Kandrona rays was one of their greatest weaknesses.

<You�re lying,> I said. <If there was a way to keep Yeerks alive without Kandrona rays and Yeerk pools, that information would make you invulnerable, even to your brother>

This time the wintry smile was even colder. If that�s possible. �Oh, maybe not. For one thing, there is a long, involved process. But that�s not the problem. The problem is the raw material. The raw material is my brother Yeerks. I must destroy and process and consume a Yeerk every three days to survive. I have become a cannibal.�

<Whoa,> Marco said.

�My brother would use this process for himself. But, as you can imagine, it would never become popular around the Yeerk Empire.�

<You really are Visser Three�s twin,> I said. I felt sick. Then I felt sicker. <How do you get the Yeerks?>

He shrugged. �What do you think that silly Yeerk forum is about, that silly mix of fact and fiction? I control Web Access America. I know the identity of all the screen names. The chat room is full of different types: people who are actually Controllers, trying to throw suspicious humans off track; humans who have discovered our little invasion and are trying to rally opposition to us; and then, there�s me. I spot the Controllers. I spot the humans who think they have found family members who are Yeerks. I monitor the real gung ho Yeerk-fighters who identify potential Controllers. I track down the screen names. I find the Yeerks. One every three days. Ten a month.�

<Cool by me,> Marco whispered. <Give the man a pat on the back, and let�s get Ax and Rachel outta here.>

I had the same feeling. Fenestre was a sickening creature, but as vile as he might be, he was wiping out a hundred or more Yeerks per year. So much the better.

But then Cassie exploded. <How are you getting the Yeerks from the human hosts?!>

Fenestre cocked an eyebrow at her. He seemed surprised. I saw a shadow of suspicion in his eyes. Cassie�s question had not been whispered. It had been shouted angrily. Why, he was asking himself, would an Andalite care?

�How am I getting the Yeerks from their human hosts?� His face was dark. His eyes empty. �How do you think I get them?�

Well, this has gotten dark. Honestly, I like this entire conversation.

# ? Jan 31, 2021 02:48

nine-gear crow: Aug 10, 2013

Esplin-9466 the Lesser, the Liquid Snake of Yeerks in oh so many ways.

# ? Jan 31, 2021 03:03

Comrade Blyatlov: Aug 4, 2007; should have picked four fingers

ASK HIM ABOUT YRKH8ER

# ? Jan 31, 2021 03:30

freebooter: Jul 7, 2009

That's a great line and yeah, I continue to be impressed by how a joke of a book has actually become really genuinely good.

Epicurius posted:

�In some cases, brothers can share. In some cases, twins can even become allies. But not with my brother. My brother is power mad. Or maybe just mad now. He left me nothing. He assigned me to a poor, unimportant human host. This Joe Bob Fenestre, a lowly programmer working in the bowels of a telephone company.

�Well, that wasn�t good enough. I wanted more. And if I couldn�t have it as a Yeerk, I�d have it as a human. I ended up making an alliance with my host. We were two of a kind. Two losers in the shadow of our betters. I used Yeerk technical knowledge to make Fenestre rich. And in the process, I created Web Access America, which made me the greatest source of information on humans there was. I knew secrets my brother could only guess at.�

It'll be interesting to compare this timeline when we get around to Visser - I don't quite remember it but I know Visser One only arrives on Earth during Desert Storm and then I think it's quite a few years before the Yeerks establish a proper secret invasion, and now it's... '96 or '97? Though I suppose rags-to-riches in the space of a handful of years isn't really that crazy when you look at modern day Silicon Valley, or even 2000s Silicon Valley.

# ? Jan 31, 2021 04:12

Bobulus: Jan 28, 2007

It occurs to me that this book opens with Jake talking about a number in a name important to him (bball23 or whatever), and now we meet an antagonist whose whole life has apparently been shaped by a number in a name.

# ? Jan 31, 2021 05:25

SirSamVimes: Jul 21, 2008; ~* Challenge *~

Bobulus posted:

It occurs to me that this book opens with Jake talking about a number in a name important to him (bball23 or whatever), and now we meet an antagonist whose whole life has apparently been shaped by a number in a name.

# ? Jan 31, 2021 05:27

Ytlaya: Nov 13, 2005

A Yeerk eating other Yeerks to avoid needing Kandrona rays is definitely up there among the more hosed up things we've encountered. At least Visser 3 changes into various beasts before devouring his kin.

Also Marco has kind of been a prick in the last couple chapters.

# ? Jan 31, 2021 09:52

Comrade Blyatlov: Aug 4, 2007; should have picked four fingers

Ytlaya posted:

A Yeerk eating other Yeerks to avoid needing Kandrona rays is definitely up there among the more hosed up things we've encountered. At least Visser 3 changes into various beasts before devouring his kin.

Also Marco has kind of been a prick in the last couple chapters.

There's a very high probability he killed his mother recently. I think Marco gets a break.

# ? Jan 31, 2021 09:53

FlocksOfMice: Feb 3, 2009

Nthing the after so many silly books this silly gimmick plot ending up being one of the heaviest storylines yet is pretty intense. I can't believe I forgot everything after the chatroom.

# ? Jan 31, 2021 22:27

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Animorphs-Book 16:The Warning-Chapter 25

quote:

Cassie let loose a growl and was racing toward Fenestre before I could say a word. He raised his Dracon beam. I leaped through the air.

I landed, paws outstretched but claws retracted, on Cassie. I knocked her wolf body sprawling across the floor.

<What are you doing?!> she yelled.

<We aren�t here to annihilate this guy,> I said. 

<Do you know what he�s doing? Do you understand?> Cassie cried.

 I screamed in frustration. <But I told him he was safe. I promised. Besides �>

<No! Don�t say it, Jake. If you say that I won�t be able to deal with you anymore. So don�t say it.>

I felt like she�d punched me. In my own, real face. What had I been about to say? Was I really going to say it was okay for this creature to go on doing what he did, as long as he got the Yeerks?

Was I going to say that? Me?

 I said lamely.

Cassie didn�t answer. She�s good at spotting lies. Too good.

 I stammered.

<That kid, Gump. That kid who was worried about his dad,> Cassie said. <That lonely little kid. That�s who this monster goes after, Jake. Not some abstract person with no face and no name. He�ll wait until Gump does something stupid. Till he confesses his fears to his Controller father, and his father makes him a Controller, too. Then Fenestre will go after them.>

<What do you expect me to do?> I asked her. <You want to get rid of this man because he�s evil? Do you want to do it yourself, Cassie?>

<You � your morph would do it better,> she said.

<You want me to get rid of him for you?> I asked. <That�s what you want?>

Fenestre just stood there, waiting, as a wolf and a tiger bristled, face-to-face. He was trying to figure something out. But I could see from his eyes that the truth had not come to him, yet.

I backed away from Cassie. I turned back to Fenestre. <My friend has lost friends in battle against your people. She is emotional.>

He nodded, unimpressed. �We�ve all lost friends in this unpleasantness.�

<Release my two friends,> I said. <We�ll let you live. We�ll walk away. As long as you are in this house, we won�t harm you. But I�ll tell you so you�ll know: If we ever catch up with you in the outside world, that protection will not exist.>

It was a stupid little threat. I said it to make myself feel better.

Ax and Rachel were released. The instant Fenestre turned off the bio-stasis fields, Ax continued to morph back into his normal Andalite shape.

I stared hard at Rachel. Was she breathing? Yes!

Was there still time to get her back into her own body?

<Rachel! Can you hear me?>

<Huh? What? Oh, man! What am I doing here?>

<Rachel, listen to me. Start demorphing. Right now.>

<There�s some guy! Who�s that guy?> she asked, glaring at Fenestre with eagle�s eyes.

<Rachel, for once, don�t argue. Forget the guy, we�re getting out of here. Demorph! Do it!

Marco. Get Rachel. Carry her out of here.>

<I�m not letting him carry me!>

But she was too weak to do much, so Marco went over and lifted her gently in his massive gorilla hands.

�Perhaps we�ll meet again,� Fenestre said cockily as we backed away.

I said nothing. What was there to say? I was letting a monster live. I was letting a killer go free.

By the time we hit the stairs Rachel was demorphing. Ax was almost fully Andalite. He still had two bird-shot pellets in his body, but they weren�t enough to harm him.

Tobias flew, as well as he could, overhead. We stumbled and trotted down the stairs, through the wreckage of the house and outside into the fenced, defended yard.

By the time we reached the trees, Rachel was Rachel again. We all demorphed, and soon we were five tired, wary kids and one Andalite hidden in the deep shadows of the trees.

We could still see the house. Fenestre�s billionaire mansion.

�What happened in there?� Rachel demanded. �Someone ripped that place. Was there some big fight and I missed it? Oh, man! I can�t believe I missed a big fight. So what happened?�

�Someone will tell you later,� I said shortly.

�Was the guy a Controller or not?� Rachel demanded. �Was he a good guy or a bad guy?�

I laughed a little. My eyes locked with Cassie�s and then we both looked away, unwilling to make contact. �Rachel, I don�t even know which I am anymore.�

I mean, Christ. Like, what do you even say about this chapter, really. I guess it's the "Do the ends justify the means?" question.

Chapter 26

quote:

I guess someone eventually told Rachel and Ax what had happened. It wasn�t me.

I got home and went up to my room and just stared at nothing for a long time. My mom called me to dinner and I mumbled my way through.

And then I went out in the backyard and sat on my rusted-out old swing set from when I was four and I stared at the sky as it turned dark. The stars came out and man, I hated them. They weren�t beautiful, they were deadly. It was from the stars that all my problems had come.

My mom came out after a while. She pretended like she was checking to see if the grass needed watering. But of course she was checking on me.

�Whatcha doing out here? Thinking great thoughts?�

�Nah. Just hanging.�

She locked her arms over her chest and looked up at the sky like I was doing. �It�s a beautiful night. Look at the stars.�

�Yeah.�

�Is anything bothering you, Jake?�

�Nope.�

�Well, if anything was bothering you, you could probably tell me without my embarrassing you too much.�

�I know, Mom. It�s nothing.�

She sighed. �Well, I guess it had to happen sooner or later. You�ve turned into a real teenager. Mom�s too out of it to talk to.�

She didn�t say it in a mean way. More like a joke.

I made a smile for her. �That must be it,� I said. �It must be that whole teenage thing.�

She shrugged. �You know, when I was your age and feeling upset, my mother, your gram, would always just say, �You don�t know what unhappy is, you�re just a kid.� Like anything a kid would feel would be less difficult or painful than what an adult would feel.�

�That�s probably true,� I said, not really listening.

�No, it isn�t,� my mother said firmly. �In a lot of ways being a kid is worse than being an adult. You have the same things to deal with: friends, temptations, love and hate, and all that. Only you don�t have the two great weapons that adults have to help them.�

I cocked an eye at her. �What two great weapons?�

�Well, the first is experience. Experience maybe doesn�t make you smarter, but it means you can think, �Hey, I had something like this happen once before, and I survived.��

�Okay, I�ll ask: What�s the second great weapon?�

She looked right at me. �You are, Jake. Because as your mom, I can look at you and think, �Oh, man, as bad as I feel right now, as bad as things may be, at least it isn�t as bad as being a teenager.��

I laughed. It was a tired, weak laugh, but it was something.

�You know, X-Files is on. You used to love that show.�

Honestly, that's a sweet scene. Jake's family does love him. And I think it's true, too. I think a lot of time people dismiss kids' concerns, but, you know, they have them just as much as adults, and like Jake's mom points out, they don't have the experience to deal with them.

quote:

The next day at school I was still feeling bad. It�s nice that my mom and dad care about me. It�s nice that they sympathize. But they don�t understand, and they can�t understand because for them everything is about my age.

How can they help me make life-and-death decisions? How can they help me keep making those decisions when I�ve made mistakes?

How can they help me make decisions no human being can ever make correctly - like deciding what to do with Fenestre?

I looked around for Cassie. We�d left it on pretty bad terms. But after a while I realized she wasn�t there. Wasn�t in school.

I suddenly knew where she was.

I made my way to the roof of the school building, cursing under my breath because I knew I was going to get busted for skipping second period. Then I morphed to my falcon and flew away.

I wasted some time going to Gump�s house, which was stupid. Cassie would have waited till he was away from the house. So I searched around for the nearest elementary school and headed there.

The kids were at recess. One little boy was way off by himself at the far end of the playfield.

There was a dog with him. At least, the average person walking by would think it was a dog. I knew it was a wolf.

As I watched, the little boy patted the wolf and then walked back to his classmates.

The wolf watched him go, then jumped the fence and faded toward some nearby trees.

<Cassie,> I said.

She looked up, surprised. I landed on the ground and began to demorph. She resumed her human shape, too.

�That was Gump, I guess.�

�Yeah.�

�What did you tell him?�

�I told him I was a magic, talking wolf. He didn�t exactly buy that. I guess by his age they�re pretty much past the point where they believe in magic.�

�Yeah, I guess so.�

�I told him not to go to that chat room again. I told him �� Her lip quivered suddenly. �I told him not to talk to his father about Yeerks. Told him not to �� Her voice was strangled. She gritted her teeth and squeezed out the last few words. �I told that little boy not to trust his father.�

There were tears running down her face. I guess they were running down my face, too. One of the things Cassie and I share is that we trust our parents, unlike some people, I guess.

�What a terrible thing for me to do,� Cassie said. �What a filthy, disgusting thing for me to do.�

�It was the best you could do,� I said. �It was all you could do. I guess it�s hard to fight evil without doing some along the way.� Maybe there was a little �I told you so� in my voice.

Cassie just walked away. I let her go. Not everything can be settled. Not everything can be smoothed over.

A few days later they showed a fire on the TV news. It was a very big story because it was this huge mansion.

The mansion belonged to billionaire Joe Bob Fenestre. Fenestre was safe. No one was hurt.

I remembered warning him that he was safe only as long as he stayed in that house. Now it was no longer possible for him to stay in the house.

Did the mansion burn down on its own? Or did someone start the fire that deprived that evil creature of sanctuary?

If someone set the fire, there was a long list of suspects. Visser Three. Cassie. One of the others. Me.

I guess you�ll never know.

I make mistakes. I fail sometimes. Sometimes I�m just plain stupid. Sometimes there is no right answer to the problems we face, but what can you do but keep trying to figure the answer out, anyway? What else can you do?

About a week went by after the fire before I went to Cassie�s house. She was in the barn, taking care of the sick animals.

I didn�t ask her any questions, and she didn�t ask me. I helped her put a splint on a deer with a broken leg. It was nice because, you know, it was just a good thing to do, no second-guessing, no doubts.

And after a while Cassie and I started talking and even laughing. The others came over and we talked about flying. But instead of flying, we stayed there and shoveled the manure out of the barn.

The six of us shoveled dirty hay, and Marco made dumb jokes, and Ax tried to eat a cow pie, and Rachel moaned about Cassie�s pathetic taste in clothing, and we were us again.

For now.

So wow. I mean, for a book that started off kind of silly with crazy internet adventures, it got pretty dark. It dealt with a lot of stuff....fear, and Jake's concerns about his leadership, and expedience vs morality, and a bunch of stuff.

So the next book is The Underground, which is a Rachel book. It's got celebrity cameos! It's got sanity hearings! It's got delicious breakfasts! It's got bat poop! It's kind of silly, kind of serious, and I think you'll like it. But that's tomorrow, For tonight and into tomorrow, what did you all think of this book?

# ? Feb 1, 2021 04:31

Comrade Blyatlov: Aug 4, 2007; should have picked four fingers

Jesus, I didn't remember that 'I don't know which I am' line. I remembered the bit about the wolf but not the fire.

Who does everyone think did it? I'm guessing the fire was Jake.

# ? Feb 1, 2021 05:50

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# ? Apr 28, 2024 11:08

freebooter: Jul 7, 2009

It was absolutely Jake. Cassie I just can't see independently doing something violent/dangerous even as a utilitarian means to an end (at least not this early in the series) and also if she was doing that there'd be no need to warn Gump, none of the others give enough of a poo poo to do it, and if it was Visser Three it's a hell of a coincidence for it to just happen now.

quote:

I make mistakes. I fail sometimes. Sometimes I�m just plain stupid. Sometimes there is no right answer to the problems we face, but what can you do but keep trying to figure the answer out, anyway? What else can you do?

YES I make mistakes

YES I fail sometimes

YES I'm lighting this Molotov cocktail and hurling it through Bill Gates' window

Epicurius posted:

So wow. I mean, for a book that started off kind of silly with crazy internet adventures, it got pretty dark. It dealt with a lot of stuff....fear, and Jake's concerns about his leadership, and expedience vs morality, and a bunch of stuff.

100%, I think for a lot of us the silly chatroom is what stuck out in our memories and I remember it being as goofy and dumb a book as 14, but that second half is absolutely solid.

17 I remember also being goofy and dumb but not as much as this one, and my memory of this one was wrong, so looking forward to it!

# ? Feb 1, 2021 05:59

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Let's Read Animorphs! The Whole Series! Ch-ch-ch-chaaanges

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