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MakaVillian
Aug 16, 2003

Well, in Whoville they say - that his tiny hands grew three sizes that day.

Eclipse12 posted:

Raw Report April 19, 1993

Provided without context: "You were knocked unconconscious at that Wrestlemania Brunch."


Note to self, don't go to any Wrestlemania brunch

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Code Jockey
Jan 24, 2006

69420 basic bytes free
really enjoying the raw reports thank you

Extra Large Marge
Jan 21, 2004

Fun Shoe
Raw reports own, love those jobber screenshots

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


Something great about the Raw reports is that a few years ago, Rarity had a wonderful thread in the wrestling forum where she watched every WWF PPV from the beginning and reviewed them. She ended it right at WrestleMania 8 (Hogan's last appearance as a regular part of the roster, ergo the end of that era), which was just before WWF phased out Saturday Night's Main event for Monday Night Raw. So it's not exact, but Eclipse12 is picking up right after she left off.

I just hope Eclipse12 can last long enough to get to King of the Ring 1994. Then we'll all find out, once and for all, "How much does dis guy weigh?"

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"

Gavok posted:

I just hope Eclipse12 can last long enough to get to King of the Ring 1994. Then we'll all find out, once and for all, "How much does dis guy weigh?"

Lmao, I had to look this up and realized something. I've been listening to WhatCulture Wrestling lists while playing video games, and I heard them talking about how having guest celeb announcers was pretty terrible. When they mentioned Donovan, I just assumed it was the Mellow Yellow singer, lol.



I had no idea who Art Donovan was, but it makes more sense that they would have the Baltimore Colts legend involved rather than a '60s pop star.

Eclipse12
Feb 20, 2008

Gavok posted:

Something great about the Raw reports is that a few years ago, Rarity had a wonderful thread in the wrestling forum where she watched every WWF PPV from the beginning and reviewed them. She ended it right at WrestleMania 8 (Hogan's last appearance as a regular part of the roster, ergo the end of that era), which was just before WWF phased out Saturday Night's Main event for Monday Night Raw. So it's not exact, but Eclipse12 is picking up right after she left off.

I just hope Eclipse12 can last long enough to get to King of the Ring 1994. Then we'll all find out, once and for all, "How much does dis guy weigh?"

That's a convenient coincidence!

I'm planning on going for as long as I can. I enjoy doing this because normally I'd end up putting this on in the background on my TV while I do other things, but I've already got a bunch of other shows for that. Having to review it means I actually pay attention (most of the time). Even dumb matches sometimes have funny moments or a great announcer quote.

Plus, I always have to have a hobby in my life that can't just be fun, it also has to kinda be work, because my brain is weird. :downs:

Anyhow, I do notice that they're getting longer, so I might have to adjust that. I'll always include pictures, but maybe have fewer. Like limited to 10. Or not. Adding more photos doesn't add that much time to the process, although I haven't been sticking to my rule of only one screenshot attempt per photo

Eclipse12
Feb 20, 2008

Well, now I HAVE to keep going, because I was just scrolling through the thumbnails to see when they upgrade the venue and came across this gem:



Life won't be complete until I see that episode


Bonus pic: Kid Rock is in the WWE Hall of Fame :rolleyes: but here's his photo

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!

Eclipse12 posted:




Bonus pic: Kid Rock is in the WWE Hall of Fame :rolleyes: but here's his photo



wtf why? Can you just buy your way in by donating to Linda's senate run?

happyhippy
Feb 21, 2005

Playing games, watching movies, owning goons. 'sup
Pillbug
Story about my cousins in the late 90s and wrestling.
All kids were mad about wrestling in the 90s, and being in Ireland here it was hard to get to watch any, or even see them live.
My cousins though, who lived other side of Ireland, saw that The Undertaker, Ultimate Warrior, Jake the Snake, and others were appearing near them!
Holy poo poo!

So they went, with placards they spent ages creating themselves.
At the gates, they were told they couldn't take in the placards, but were told they can collect some 'allowed' ones inside.
So they did, and they were smaller and shittier, but also spelled wrongly as they thought then.
But then the actual wrestlers came out. Jack the Snakeman! The Undertakers! The Ultimate Warriors!
All fake wrestlers, dressed similarly but just slightly different, trying to pretend to be the real ones.
Cousins were totally pissed angry at the time.

Anyone else see this happen, I wonder if it was common back then.

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"

Bonzo posted:

wtf why? Can you just buy your way in by donating to Linda's senate run?

He has a song that Undertaker used during his Biker gimmick

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020

Why are we acting like it's strange that Kid Rock is in the WWE hall of fame? It makes perfect sense.

It's like seeing vermin in a dumpster. Sure a raccoon isn't *technically* garbage, but it is part of the garbage ecosystem.

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~
The WWE has a celebrity wing including other noted WWE performers like Drew Carey and Donald Trump :eng101:

Eclipse12
Feb 20, 2008

Rarity posted:

The WWE has a celebrity wing including other noted WWE performers like Drew Carey and Donald Trump :eng101:







Edit:

Eclipse12 fucked around with this message at 19:10 on Feb 28, 2021

frankenfreak
Feb 16, 2007

I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

Rarity posted:

The WWE has a celebrity wing including other noted WWE performers like Drew Carey and Donald Trump :eng101:
Drew Carey was in a Royal Rumble and Donald Trump can at least claim he has taken a stunner. What did Kid Rock do?

MakaVillian
Aug 16, 2003

Well, in Whoville they say - that his tiny hands grew three sizes that day.

frankenfreak posted:

Drew Carey was in a Royal Rumble and Donald Trump can at least claim he has taken a stunner. What did Kid Rock do?

Trump loving no-sold that stunner if I recall

Trying
Sep 26, 2019

Rarity posted:

This is a lie and you know it

The Game Day threads are fun :colbert:. I will not defend the eternal litigation of Coward Tony's crimes against women.

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


frankenfreak posted:

Drew Carey was in a Royal Rumble and Donald Trump can at least claim he has taken a stunner. What did Kid Rock do?

Kid Rock performed a medley at WrestleMania 25. It went on for ten minutes and it meant not only pushing a match onto the pre-show (only viewable on the DVD), but it coincided with all the entrances from the Ms. WrestleMania Battle Royal. They built it up as women from WWE past and present showing up, but since everyone was coming out at the same time, you had them going, "Who was just eliminated... Sunny? Huh. Sunny was in this."

Then they had a comedy jobber in drag win the match.

As for Trump, he also got HOF points for hosting the venue for WM4 and 5.

Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

frankenfreak
Feb 16, 2007

I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade

Gavok posted:

Kid Rock performed a medley at WrestleMania 25.
That's stretching the definition of "WWE performer" and you know it. :colbert:

It did made me think though that once Vince is out of the picture, Triple H is going to move heaven and earth to get Motörhead into the HOF.

My Lovely Horse
Aug 21, 2010

At least the Misfits took part in matches and stuff, there's more of a point to be made for them.

... up to now all I knew about that was a vague "yup they sure were in WCW" but I read up on it and it's actually hilarious. Jerry Only had championship ambitions (to be fair: not that out of the way in WCW) and had his first ever match against Steve Williams in a cage, and Doyle stole and later married Macho Man's girlfriend.

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020

Iirc jay Leno once did the wrestling. Is he in the hof as well?

Rarity
Oct 21, 2010

~*4 LIFE*~

Prof. Crocodile posted:

Iirc jay Leno once did the wrestling. Is he in the hof as well?

He worked with WCW so no

Gavok
Oct 10, 2005

Brock! Oh, man, I'm sorry about your...

...tooth?


frankenfreak posted:

That's stretching the definition of "WWE performer" and you know it. :colbert:

It's not like I'm defending the decision.

Though now I'm remembering that the first time they had a celebrity induction, it was Pete Rose, who was there because 1) he got beat up by Kane at three WrestleManias and 2) it was a baseball HOF joke. Mr. T did not get the joke and was genuinely pissed off about this, refusing to be inducted for ten years. Then when he did get inducted, he spent about a half hour doing an acceptance speech that had nothing to do with wrestling whatsoever and was just about how much we should love and respect our mothers. This kept going until Kane had to walk out and awkwardly tell him to wrap it up.

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

Vince Mcmahon is desperate for mainstream validation, so if you're a celebrity and you so much as appear on WWE you're likely to be inducted into their hall of fame

bradzilla
Oct 15, 2004

That reminded me of the time Mcmahon sent the Undertaker to meet with Lebron James, unannounced, and got snubbed.

https://ftw.usatoday.com/2016/11/lebron-james-the-undertaker-snub

Shaman Tank Spec
Dec 26, 2003

*blep*



frankenfreak posted:

Drew Carey was in a Royal Rumble and Donald Trump can at least claim he has taken a stunner. What did Kid Rock do?

It was one of the worst jobs of taking the stunner ever.

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the former President was dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin

bradzilla posted:

That reminded me of the time Mcmahon sent the Undertaker to meet with Lebron James, unannounced, and got snubbed.

https://ftw.usatoday.com/2016/11/lebron-james-the-undertaker-snub



This is giving off powerful "I'm the only kid wearing a costume at school on Halloween" energy.

This also summarizes one of the major problems with modern WWE - they have this obsession with being "mainstream" and have tried to become this super generic "entertainment program" to do so. But, ultimately, it's about dudes and ladies in tights beating each other up, so you'll always be weird and should just embrace that.

Meanwhile AEW has a wrestling dinosaur and it owns.

Gaz2k21
Sep 1, 2006

MEGALA---WHO??!!??
Enjoying this thread very much, Pro Wrestling is beautiful light entertainment that occasionally catches you off guard with a powerful and engaging storyline, I’ve been struggling to maintain my love of wrestling through lockdown with how bad WWE is and I just can’t get into AEW (I despise the young bucks with a passion)

I live in the UK and for a while the scene was hijacked by a hipster punk rock crowd but it’s pretty much been destroyed thanks to Covid/a lot of talent being outed as sex offenders etc it’s been pretty horrible.
I actually do a bit of wrestling myself and look forward to getting back to training I’m a late 30s fat short guy though so I literally do it for fun and probably do about 10 matches a year for my local promotion it’s a blast but I’ll probably drop I when I hit 40, I primarily do comedy stuff and have a gimmick that is easy to get over with the crowd and have been lucky enough to work with some amazing British wrestlers anyway here is a picture of me having my head knocked off during a rumble by a large man called Ruffneck (who very briefly was seen in fighting with my family)

Archer666
Dec 27, 2008
Wrestling is great for all the goofy poo poo you can clip into gifs

YeahTubaMike
Mar 24, 2005

*hic* Gotta finish thish . . .
Doctor Rope

Shaman Tank Spec posted:

It was one of the worst jobs of taking the stunner ever.



Stone Cold should have just done it for real

Prof. Crocodile
Jun 27, 2020

YeahTubaMike posted:

Stone Cold should have just done it for real

There is still time! Stone Cold Steve Austin if you are reading this thread, there is still time!

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

I'm gonna get poo poo on for this.
*sigh*

I loving hate Trump. I hate the man and wish I'd never heard of him in my entire life and pray every day he's gone.

He was in his late 50's, 60's? or whatever? when being asked to sell a stunner in a business suit and has never done anything more athletic than swing a golf club, ever in his entire life.
I've thought he's been given a bad shake on that. I'd like to see you, average goon, sell it right now and look any better. Sure it looks like poo poo, but you're expecting an old, out of shape moron to flop and sell a multi-stage wrestling move. At least he tried to sell out. It's like the only thing I'll ever in my loving life give the man any semblance of credit for.

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"

Archer666 posted:

Wrestling is great for all the goofy poo poo you can clip into gifs



This is my favorite gif from that match

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

Bogus Adventure posted:

This is my favorite gif from that match



I thought I've asked you before not to post pics from our wedding night

Trying
Sep 26, 2019

Back in my schoolyard days we were obsessed with giving each other sharpshooters and figure-fours so I'm pretty solid on those

Shaman Tank Spec
Dec 26, 2003

*blep*



Big Beef City posted:

I've thought he's been given a bad shake on that. I'd like to see you, average goon, sell it right now and look any better. Sure it looks like poo poo, but you're expecting an old, out of shape moron to flop and sell a multi-stage wrestling move. At least he tried to sell out. It's like the only thing I'll ever in my loving life give the man any semblance of credit for.

Lol that motherfucker kind of tried to bend down at the hips but did such a lovely job that he slipped out of Austin's grip halfway through.

Nobody's asking him to do some Rock cartwheels but for gently caress's sake you'd have to try to do a worse job.

ItohRespectArmy
Sep 11, 2019

Cutest In The World, Six Time DDT Ironheavymetalweight champion, Two Time International Princess champion, winner of two tournaments, a Princess Tag Team champion, And a pretty good singer too!
"When I was an idol, I felt nothing every day but now that I'm a pro wrestler I'm in pain constantly!"

Big Beef City posted:

I'm gonna get poo poo on for this.
*sigh*

I loving hate Trump. I hate the man and wish I'd never heard of him in my entire life and pray every day he's gone.

He was in his late 50's, 60's? or whatever? when being asked to sell a stunner in a business suit and has never done anything more athletic than swing a golf club, ever in his entire life.
I've thought he's been given a bad shake on that. I'd like to see you, average goon, sell it right now and look any better. Sure it looks like poo poo, but you're expecting an old, out of shape moron to flop and sell a multi-stage wrestling move. At least he tried to sell out. It's like the only thing I'll ever in my loving life give the man any semblance of credit for.

selling a stunner is insanely easy, as an average goon who also trains to be a pro wrestler sometimes, I could probably teach people it pretty easily with my limited knowledge, the idea that nobody could get trump to practice enough to do better than that is insanely funny.

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

ItohRespectArmy posted:

selling a stunner is insanely easy, as an average goon who also trains to be a pro wrestler sometimes

Ok, mate, I think you fall out of who "Donald Trump" is as a person. or what I meant.


...told you I'd get poo poo.

He was your stiff as poo poo dad/uncle in costume doing something he'd never done without practice. Boom. There. How's that? He still tried, is what I meant.

Big Beef City fucked around with this message at 19:10 on Mar 1, 2021

ItohRespectArmy
Sep 11, 2019

Cutest In The World, Six Time DDT Ironheavymetalweight champion, Two Time International Princess champion, winner of two tournaments, a Princess Tag Team champion, And a pretty good singer too!
"When I was an idol, I felt nothing every day but now that I'm a pro wrestler I'm in pain constantly!"

Big Beef City posted:




...told you I'd get poo poo.

that tends to happen when you post something real dumb, OP.

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Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

ItohRespectArmy posted:

that tends to happen when you post something real dumb, OP.

He wasn't a real character and just an old man playing pretend and that was my point.

No one expected Trump to bend at the hips and knees and take the bump, Holmes.

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