|
Outrail posted:My new hire starts today, what dumb poo poo should I have her do to make her hate me as quickly as possible? I don't think I can top the "forward email" one, but my suggestion is to try and respond to any question with either "Oh, I expected that you would already have known this, but I can answer it sure!" or "We already covered this, but I don't mind going over it again!". Bonus points if you have NOT already covered that topic!
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 17:24
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 16, 2024 13:02 |
|
|
Brain Curry posted:I’m sure that’s their sincere intention, and not a joke post on a comedy site. Given the people I've worked with in the present and past, there are entirely too many people who actually think that way to assume a joke. If it is a joke: documentation for everything, depending on what the work is. Paper trails are good and necessary but there is no quicker way to resentment than putting a paperwork barrier in the way of literally everything.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 17:26
|
|
|
Brain Curry posted:I’m sure that’s their sincere intention, and not a joke post on a comedy site. No no, Skye is correct. I am a supermassive shithead and am actively trying to ruin the company, my career and the lives of my employees for absolutely no reason. Duh. Outrail fucked around with this message at 17:29 on Mar 2, 2021 |
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 17:26
|
|
|
Outrail posted:No no, Skye is correct. I am a supermassive shithead and am actively trying to ruin the company, my career and the lives of my employees for absolutely no reason. Duh. I can only assume now that the thread author is your alt account and the entire time you were just fishing for ideas 
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 17:31
|
|
|
I find talking about anime helps build the loathing immediately. Especially here in Japan where I mispronounce every word and name.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 17:32
|
|
|
Outrail posted:No no, Skye is correct. I am a supermassive shithead and am actively trying to ruin the company, my career and the lives of my employees. Duh. See, I read this and then look at my email window where the consequences of "saving a few bucks" are coming back to roost and we have to scramble to find a new building, because the supermassive shithead at the top sold our building, leased part of it back to stay in temporarily, and then hosed around and never found a new place as the non-renewable lease is a few months from ending and putting our entire data center in rented storage units for a while. Just because the cost of rental would have saved a couple percent over continued ownership (and of course new real estate would eat that entire savings). Primed to believe the "actively out to sabotage" signals when they're being proven right daily.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 17:34
|
|
|
SkyeAuroline posted:Primed to believe the "actively out to sabotage" signals when they're being proven right daily. Woah. The world really is a gently caress.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 17:36
|
|
|
One thing that I dislike about the application process for jobs (in america at least) is having to fill out the stuff about have I ever lived under a different name. I get to out myself as trans on every job application!
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 17:55
|
|
|
George H.W. oval office posted:Thats the good stuff. My annoying coworker did this to one of my other coworkers. She was working from home and he called her to ask where a form was, and then when she ignored his call he emailed her. She got back 20 minutes later by emailing me instead with him ccd, telling me where the form was in her desk so I could show him (I didn't know where it was because its not related to my position). He can read so he got it himself. He then had a question about the form and emailed her asking. Again, she emailed me, ccing him, answering his question but directing it to me. He used to like her as a coworker and after that the cracks began to show.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 18:01
|
|
|
Zarin posted:I don't think I can top the "forward email" one, but my suggestion is to try and respond to any question with either "Oh, I expected that you would already have known this, but I can answer it sure!" or "We already covered this, but I don't mind going over it again!". Bonus points if you have NOT already covered that topic! I get the opposite from my annoying coworker, where its more like them asking me to send them something/do some mundane task that I've already done. I'll tell them I sent it already and they'll say they didn't get it. I then go find the sent message in my inbox and forward it to them again. Ive asked them if they know how to search in Gmail, and they say yes but I don't think they do. Instead of using search + sorting things into folders via Gmail they set up Google rooms for each individual person in our office, where they will then ask you poo poo + ask you to submit poo poo in that room. So our office has one big room, then every worker has there own room, and we also have another room for PO's with our procurement and finance departments, who ignore it entirely and do everything via scans and email anyway.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 18:06
|
|
|
Outrail posted:My new hire starts today, what dumb poo poo should I have her do to make her hate me as quickly as possible? Explain your Robosexual av and the history behind it. Ensure she knows exactly why you wanted us to pity gently caress a morose and spiteful robot.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 18:14
|
|
|
titty_baby_ posted:Passive aggressively establish a hierarchy. If she asks you something via email, forward that email to another coworker and say "hey so and so can you help new hire with this?" And then answer the question in the email. This but delegate the task
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 18:24
|
|
|
Outrail posted:No no, Skye is correct. I am a supermassive shithead and am actively trying to ruin the company, my career and the lives of my employees for absolutely no reason. Duh. Just be yourself! You got this!
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 18:29
|
|
|
duddits posted:One thing that I dislike about the application process for jobs (in america at least) is having to fill out the stuff about have I ever lived under a different name. From a philosophical standpoint, the real you is the you you are right now, so I would say telling them your dead name is not necessary. (I apologise if I have the wrong terminology for the concepts I mentioned, please correct me if I have made a mistake).
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 18:30
|
|
|
Steakandchips posted:From a philosophical standpoint, the real you is the you you are right now, so I would say telling them your dead name is not necessary. No, you're spot on, and thats how I look at it, but once that turns up on any kind of background check or financial stuff, you're either not hired for lying on the application, or fired for lying on the application. I do get the concept, but it's an easy way to out me and toss me right in the trash can. The glittery trash can of course.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 18:42
|
|
|
duddits posted:No, you're spot on, and thats how I look at it, but once that turns up on any kind of background check or financial stuff, you're either not hired for lying on the application, or fired for lying on the application. I thankfully haven't been asked that yet (same boat as you). Are you in finance or something similar? (or some public sector work digs pretty deep on applicants, I guess)
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 18:48
|
|
|
SkyeAuroline posted:I thankfully haven't been asked that yet (same boat as you). Are you in finance or something similar? (or some public sector work digs pretty deep on applicants, I guess) Nope, but a lot of corporate type jobs still do that level of background checks though. I think it also gets flagged on the I9 stuff to help prevent identity theft. Even if it's not found til later, thats still 'well you lied on the application process, seeya. I really do understand the concept, it just gives people an out to not go forward with my application well before it'd be able to prove it was because of any sort of bias.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 18:52
|
|
|
duddits posted:No, you're spot on, and thats how I look at it, but once that turns up on any kind of background check or financial stuff, you're either not hired for lying on the application, or fired for lying on the application. A potential solution I see would having background checks be "blind". Applicants submit all their personal information to the background check people directly and they just report to the hiring manager whether anything bad comes up. I guess its finance jobs that actually do this level of checking? I've never dealt with it myself. Edit: Actually I believe that's how its done here when hiring teachers, social workers and similar. They get a no-joke background check with fingerprinting and everything by the state government. I think the school district just gets a simple pass/fail back from the agency. Pekinduck fucked around with this message at 19:21 on Mar 2, 2021 |
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 19:14
|
|
|
Even if you're gonna be the mail room drone, if you're direct hiring to a Fortune 500 they're gonna at least run credit check and criminal history background on you and your past names because???? Data driven hiring decisions I guess. Often require the same for contractors even.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 19:33
|
|
|
It's a liability issue. If someone is hired without a background check, assaults another employee, and it turns out the background check would've turned up risk factors for that, then that's going to be evidence in the lawsuit against the company. Remember, HR exists to protect the company from being sued by its employees. Everything they do is a matter of managing that risk. Some of them aren't very good at it, but that's what they're there for.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 19:40
|
|
|
False. HR exists to make everyone angry with each other and HR instead of focusing on the company itself.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 19:54
|
|
|
Outrail posted:My new hire starts today, what dumb poo poo should I have her do to make her hate me as quickly as possible? Ask her if she has stairs in her house, and if she knows the terrible secret of space.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 20:12
|
|
|
How dare you nerds not appreciate a love story between a wizard lady and her Gundam! 
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 20:12
|
|
|
Outrail posted:False. HR exists to make everyone angry with each other and HR instead of focusing on the company itself. The Office undersold irritation with HR, as Toby didn't do anything to deserve it. This week had to request an HR Director tell senior management to send in request forms the same way every other user does, and to stop having them email our team directly expecting preferential treatment. The director got annoyed that we would dare expect a VP to click a link.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 20:21
|
|
|
Jeza posted:As someone with a very ethnic name attached to a decidedly non-ethnic body, ~10 years ago I got very used to a very particular look of visible confusion and disappointment when arriving for an interview, so it's not like it doesn't imply anything about you. Nowadays, they just look you up on LinkedIn first (and maybe Facebook if they're psychos) in advance anyway so no photos means nothing if the position is in any way considered important. my grandfather is adopted and the family is pretty gringo-fied anyway but people assumed I was spanish fluent at every job I've ever had so far lol. when I reported to my first duty station after tech school they had no idea who I was at first because they expected the brown looking dude from the class photo and not the 6 foot red head
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 20:29
|
|
|
Larry Parrish posted:my grandfather is adopted and the family is pretty gringo-fied anyway but people assumed I was spanish fluent at every job I've ever had so far lol. when I reported to my first duty station after tech school they had no idea who I was at first because they expected the brown looking dude from the class photo and not the 6 foot red head Ah, los siento Miguel Sanchez. Mucho apologises
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 20:32
|
|
|
TITTIEKISSER69 posted:Ask her if she has stairs in her house, and if she knows the terrible secret of space. Screening out goons as part of the hiring process is a good call.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 20:34
|
|
|
I figured out my coworker was a goon, after working with him for a year, when he said "cliffyb".
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 20:46
|
|
|
gently caress SNEEP posted:I figured out my coworker was a goon, after working with him for a year, when he said "cliffyb". I repost a lot of cursed images from the gbs thread here, and I had to admit to a coworker I go on SA because they were.convinced I was a channer
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 20:49
|
|
|
titty_baby_ posted:I repost a lot of cursed images from the gbs thread here, and I had to admit to a coworker I go on SA because they were.convinced I was a channer Yeah that's pretty much the only way I can see myself agreeing to disclose such information
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 21:26
|
|
|
gently caress SNEEP posted:I figured out my coworker was a goon, after working with him for a year, when he said "cliffyb". There are a significant amount of SA emoticons on my department's slack. I know somebody out there must be, if they've not moved on already.
|
|
#
?
Mar 2, 2021 22:18
|
|
|
Devs are fairly in-demand in the UK, so my CV is now just my name, phone number, job history that is relevant to the job that I'm applying for (so about ten year's worth), a sidebar with a list of things I have experience with (e.g: programming languages and frameworks, databases, web services etc) a mention of the fact that I have a bachelor's degree, plus 'Employment references and further work and education history available on request'. One side of A4. This is largely because in my previous job I was responsible for hiring and I realised that I absolutely do not give a drat what someone in their late 30s got for their GCSEs or A Levels 20 years ago and I definitely do not need to know that they had a Saturday job in a supermarket when they were a teenager, because the only thing that mattered to me is what they've been doing in the field they're looking to work in. I hadn't heard of this trend of people attaching photos to CVs or dumb poo poo like styling them like the front of a newspaper, thank god.
|
|
#
?
Mar 3, 2021 00:12
|
|
|
Sardonik posted:There are a significant amount of SA emoticons on my department's slack. I know somebody out there must be, if they've not moved on already. Same, though I had to add  because it is frequently useful.
|
|
#
?
Mar 3, 2021 01:17
|
|
|
Inzombiac posted:Not my current job but I applied for a case advocate job for the IRS (essentially a person that works with people who are struggling to pay their taxes by trying to secure extra money/grants for them, a decently noble cause) and at the end of the very brief application process it automatically tells me that I'm not qualified. Yeah the tracking systems are fuckin weird. My current job is a Senior level job title. But when I was hunting I applied for the non senior version of my same title at the same company. Few months later I got a rejection email but I saw there was now a posting for a Sr, applied to that one for shits and got the job. Might’ve just been a case of “the candidates were getting dont quite have what we want, so let’s cancel the non sr posting and remake it” and mine was lovely enough to be rejected early on but good enough to get the job when they really needed me.
|
|
#
?
Mar 3, 2021 01:55
|
|
|
Pekinduck posted:A potential solution I see would having background checks be "blind". Applicants submit all their personal information to the background check people directly and they just report to the hiring manager whether anything bad comes up. I've had that asked working in the insurance industry, when I applied for comcast, working in a warehouse, etc. Honestly I think it might be standard on I9 stuff now too, but I've been doing gig work and small business work for long enough now that i don't honestly know.
|
|
#
?
Mar 3, 2021 08:23
|
|
|
I've been on a management course this week and they basically kicked it off by showing a Ted talk of some guy who loves Apple almost as much as huffing his own farts. Did you know everyone loves Apple and buys all their stuff because of their amazing values? Also imagine I'm doing William Shatner style pauses before every key word for the full effect. Quote-Unquote posted:
I've supported our hiring process over the years and I've seen the two ends of the scale on CVs: boomers emphasising the fact that they're divorced with no kids, and graduates listing a half dozen jobs from McDonald's to multiple positions they were furloughed from last year. Which is fine, it'll be good for our new starter when she can remove McDonald's from her CV and add her first job on a pharmaceutical company with us.
|
|
#
?
Mar 3, 2021 11:29
|
|
|
Marmaduke! posted:I've supported our hiring process over the years and I've seen the two ends of the scale on CVs: boomers emphasising the fact that they're divorced with no kids, and graduates listing a half dozen jobs from McDonald's to multiple positions they were furloughed from last year. Which is fine, it'll be good for our new starter when she can remove McDonald's from her CV and add her first job on a pharmaceutical company with us. As I've found out recently, Boomers who never had to create a resume in their lives are also the same people who won't Google "how to format a resume" and just assume you need to know they maintain a wood stove when they apply to sales jobs. They will also then fight anyone to tells them to remove it for inexplicable reasons.
|
|
#
?
Mar 3, 2021 16:59
|
|
|
Marmaduke! posted:I've been on a management course this week and they basically kicked it off by showing a Ted talk of some guy who loves Apple almost as much as huffing his own farts. Did you know everyone loves Apple and buys all their stuff because of their amazing values? Also imagine I'm doing William Shatner style pauses before every key word for the full effect. I am pretty sure that is my sleep paralysis demon when I don't take my anti-depressants.
|
|
#
?
Mar 3, 2021 17:14
|
|
|
Mojo Jojo posted:Although I'm seeing more and more grads from UK universities putting photos on. Which we have to autoreject without reading. I assume there's some reason for this but we can't even reach out and explain they need to stop it because the company is terrified of getting sued. Weird, where did they get the idea that this was a thing? I’ve never seen it. I can understand the rejection, but given you can guess race to about about 90% by name, higher after a phonecall, the photos aren’t gonna make much difference to the opportunity to discriminate. Unless you’re trying to not subconsciously hire cuties.
|
|
#
?
Mar 3, 2021 17:24
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 16, 2024 13:02 |
|
|
wooger posted:Unless you’re trying to not subconsciously hire cuties. A manager dials into his zoom call with hr "Jim I hear you have a proposition to help address the sexual harassment claims in your team" "Yeah, what if we only hire uggos?"
|
|
#
?
Mar 3, 2021 18:12
|
|
