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I haven't seen an OP self own this hard since the Simpsons meme thread
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Mar 7, 2021 17:35
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Rarity posted:I haven't seen an OP self own this hard since the Simpsons meme thread I love it  Owned from literally the first response
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Mar 7, 2021 17:40
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Rarity posted:I haven't seen an OP self own this hard since the Simpsons meme thread 1 post in he own thread, a shameful OP
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Mar 7, 2021 17:41
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Raw Report May 10, 1993 .................       Chaos in the streets! Tonight, on RAW!!! .................  We could hear the announcers better if they would TURN. OFF. THE. OBNOXIOUS. SIREN. .................  Bam Bam Birgilia is in a King of the Ring qualifying match against Typhoon. "Talk about the beef, look at it here in the WWF!"  "Um, dude, your boob's out."    Credit to Bigelow for lifting Typhoon on several occasions. BBB surives the Typhoon to get the win .................   Cowpokes continue inching ever closer to the WWF ...............  Yokozuna versus P.J. Walker so, you know.. go grab a snack or check your emails or something. ................  Today on the King of the Ring Report, Mean Gene narcs on Lex Luger for using Ico Pro. Mean indeed!  Wow, I would actually watch WWF Superstars just to watch Tatanka chop Gonzalez into a normal sized human. ................. Just FYI, this era of Raw does a weird continuing gag where they put a plus-sized ring girl in between matches and make jokes at her expense. These are mean-spirited and unfunny so I tend not to mention them.   "Iron Mike" Sharp is up against Mr. Perfect. They get into a literal slap fight.  Bobby Heenan watches Bobby Heenan watching TV.   Anyhow, the fight between Perfect and Sharp ends, and credit due for a filler fight, because it wasn't half bad. ....................  Okay, call me confused, but now Mr Hughes is fighting Cannonball Kid. Who last week was called Kamikaze Kid. Who is wearing the uniform of Lightning Kid. Who will later be 1-2-3 Kid. You can't build brand recognition that way, Kid! Lol, Vince just called him the Kamikaze Kid. Even the announcers don't know who the hell he is.  Just lifting a dude up by his own head, nbd  This game is glitchy... Sure looks easy to win a fight when you got 200lbs on your opponent. ............  Alright, this is what we've been waiting for! Lumberjack match! Michaels against Hacksaw Jim Duggan!  The setup for this match is that a handful of other "lumberjack" wrestlers will surround the ring and if you try to escape, they'll sock you right in the gob and chuck you back in. So Shawn Michaels can't try his normal strategy of "keep my belt if I run away and get counted out."  Oh dip! Things heat up early when Duggan does a side quest and attacks Lumberjack Yokozuna!  What's this? Michaels staggers out on crutches but of course he was OBVIOUSLY FAKING and the match finally gets started.   For no reason I've decided to immortalize this random fan. 28 years ago he went to a Raw event and now he's on SomethingAwful until the end of time (or the forums die, whichever comes first). You didn't even know what the Internet was 28 years ago and now you're ON IT!    Anyhow, Jim Duggan imposes his meaty vengeance on Michaels. This guy is just so gosh-darned likeable. I'm in my recliner yelling "Hooooo!!!!" right along with the crowd. Duggan is absolutely dominating, which tells me he will 100% lose this fight.  Michaels loves this moment where he gets clobbered and does a little pirouette.  Ha ha ha. Bob Backlund is Porky-Pigging it outside of the ring. Ha. Gross.  Michaels tries to run but the lumberjacks kindly ask him to return to his rear end kicking.  Shawn takes off his cowboy boot and bops Duggan with it, and apparently that floppy boot did more damage to Duggan than all of Duggan's suplexes, body slams, punches, and stomps combined did to Michaels.  Michaels might have a contract where he gets to win a lot, but he sure gets absolutely pounded in every match right up until the moment he wins. He's SUCH a ham, though. Every atrack has him bouncing and flailing like he was hit by a truck.  Previously on today's Raw Report:   Okay, we all knew the match would end due to some nonsense from the lumberjacks and that's exactly what happens. I'm not even going to explain it all. Michaels keeps his belt. Booooooo!!!! Entertaining all the same. Fun episode. Eclipse12 fucked around with this message at 19:32 on Mar 7, 2021 |
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Mar 7, 2021 19:22
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Eclipse12 posted:[b]Raw Report May 10, 1993
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Mar 7, 2021 20:39
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MakaVillian posted:Guaranteed his next time on Raw he'll be called Kamikaze Kid just to try and cover up Vince's mistake A logical guess, but they go a different direction   Edit: that's just the thumbnail, though, so who knows what they'll actually call him Find out next time, on Raw! Report!
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Mar 7, 2021 20:45
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I thought the whole 1 2 3 kid gimmick was that he was just someone who they plucked out of the audience and won surprisingly. Never knew Xpac had like 4 personas before that.
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Mar 7, 2021 20:53
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MrMidnight posted:I thought the whole 1 2 3 kid gimmick was that he was just someone who they plucked out of the audience and won surprisingly. Never knew Xpac had like 4 personas before that. He was "the .... Kid" for a while and was a jobber. He got the 1-2-3 moniker after upsetting razor Ramone on raw.
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Mar 7, 2021 21:05
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Spoilers!! (On a 28-year-old TV show episide that only I will ever watch)
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Mar 7, 2021 21:11
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It doesn't matter anyway because the app already spoiled it for me. When I grabbed the screenshot a few posts up, here's what was right underneath it: 
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Mar 7, 2021 21:13
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I'd be upset too if someone mooned me from the top rope.
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Mar 7, 2021 21:28
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Vince MechMahon posted:He was "the .... Kid" for a while and was a jobber. He got the 1-2-3 moniker after upsetting razor Ramone on raw. You're not supposed to spoil your own show Vince!
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Mar 7, 2021 22:03
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Shaman Tank Spec posted:I'd be upset too if someone mooned me from the top rope. 
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Mar 7, 2021 22:05
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I was incredibly into it in the late 90's, to the extent that we were doing backyard idiocy (several of my friends still have permanent injuries. Ah, youth.) But this thread got me poking around again, I hadn't watched anything since the WWE turned into the John Cena show (just never cared for him.) But I did check out a bunch of AEW clips and it's... pretty great.
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Mar 7, 2021 22:08
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I've been watching it for 4-5 weeks now, it owns and I'm super psyched for Revolution
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Mar 7, 2021 22:10
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My Lovely Horse posted:I've been watching it for 4-5 weeks now, it owns and I'm super psyched for Revolution
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Mar 7, 2021 22:11
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The Breakfast Sampler posted:I did check out a bunch of AEW clips and it's... pretty great. Come join us in PSP for Dynamite on Wednesday, it's always a fun time 
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Mar 7, 2021 22:28
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Rarity posted:Come join us in PSP for Dynamite on Wednesday, it's always a fun time Or Tuesdays for Dark, which streams on YouTube for free if you don't have TNT. Or the ppv TONIGHT.
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Mar 7, 2021 22:32
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Sweet! I need something to like, be into again. But this is scratching the itch. I hope nobody dies today (I guess.) Also Sting's back, evidently! WTF, the guy's a consummate pro but how can he keep going like this?
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Mar 7, 2021 22:50
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The Breakfast Sampler posted:Sweet! I need something to like, be into again. But this is scratching the itch. I hope nobody dies today (I guess.) Also Sting's back, evidently! WTF, the guy's a consummate pro but how can he keep going like this? On the ppv tonight Sting is teaming up with Darby Allin (young punk who paints half his face) in a street fight against Team Taz: Brian Cage, muscle golem, and Ricky Starks, who is the next Rock.
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Mar 7, 2021 22:52
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genuinely distraught I can't watch it live and will have to steer well clear of this thread until I get the chance
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Mar 7, 2021 22:54
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The Breakfast Sampler posted:how can he keep going like this? The match is a pre-tape so they can work around his conditioning 
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Mar 7, 2021 22:57
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Rarity posted:The match is a pre-tape so they can work around his conditioning And apparently it was a huge success Edit: Going to watch Revolution tonight and I'm pumped (first ppv I've watched since Rock-Cena at Wrestlemania 29 I think)
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Mar 7, 2021 23:01
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So did we ever figure out who the hell enjoys wrestling 
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Mar 7, 2021 23:03
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Guy leaves a young Andre the Giant hanging, receives receipts soon enough. 
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Mar 7, 2021 23:12
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Sydney Bottocks posted:So did we ever figure out who the hell enjoys wrestling Everybody, apparently
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Mar 7, 2021 23:12
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Sydney Bottocks posted:So did we ever figure out who the hell enjoys wrestling seems like everyone but the OP
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Mar 7, 2021 23:41
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me in diapproval of OP Itoh simps and those that repost arbys ads without getting paid.  but that pic of lord alfred is really good.
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Mar 8, 2021 00:42
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Here's the basics on what's going down with the AEW PPV tonight: Kenny Omega (c) vs. Jon Moxley in an Exploding Barbed Wire Death Match for the AEW World Championship When AEW started, Omega and Moxley had a dream match feud that Moxley won. Moxley went on to win the AEW Championship while Omega found success in the tag division with Hangman Adam Page as his partner. By the time he and Hangman lost the tag titles, Omega had grown to resent his partner and went back to being a singles star. Moxley kept defeating all comers as champ while Omega won a tournament to be crowned #1 contender (last beating Hangman). During the title match, Omega won via cheating with the help of his friend Don Callis, who runs the promotion Impact. Since then, Omega has been palling around with Callis and the Impact tag champs the Good Brothers. He offered Moxley a rematch for the title, but in the form of a completely over-the-top hardcore death match that you'd only usually see in Japan. Hikaru Shida (c) vs. Ryo Mizunami for the AEW Women's World Championship Hikaru Shida has been Women's Champion for seemingly forever to the point that there just didn't seem to be any challengers left for her. AEW held a big 16-woman tournament where half of the bracket took place in the US and the other in Japan. Ryo Mizunami won the Japanese bracket and then the full tournament by defeating former champion Nyla Rose in the finals. The Young Bucks (Matt Jackson and Nick Jackson) (c) vs. The Inner Circle (Chris Jericho and MJF) for the AEW World Tag Team Championship The Young Bucks are the face of the tag team division in AEW and won the tag titles at the last PPV. A tag team battle royal was put together to name their #1 contenders and that ended up being Chris Jericho and MJF of the Inner Circle. Lately, the Inner Circle's deal is that MJF earned his spot on the team, but has very obviously been trying to work his way towards usurping leadership from his mentor Chris Jericho. This caused Jericho's other protege Sammy Guevara to get fed up and leave the group. Casino Tag Team Royale A 15-team Royal Rumble where the winning team gets a future title shot. Sting and Darby Allin vs. Team Taz (Brian Cage and Ricky Starks) in a Street Fight A while back, skater daredevil loner guy Darby Allin lost a big match and commentator Taz offered to mentor him. Darby told him to go gently caress off. Insulted, Taz gradually put together a stable of meaty men and sent them after Darby. At one point, Sting showed up in AEW and admitted that he saw a lot of himself in Darby Allin. He ended up falling into the role of Darby's mentor by helping him fend off Taz and his army. Now they're going to fight it out in a pre-taped "cinematic match" to hide the fact that Sting is loving ancient. Cody Rhodes vs. Scorpio Sky vs. Penta El Zero Miedo vs. Lance Archer vs. Max Caster vs. TBA in a Face of the Revolution Ladder Match It's a big ladder match where the winner gets a shot at the TNT Championship, currently held by Darby Allin. If Allin is too beat up from his own match, he'll have to forfeit the belt. Hangman Adam Page vs. Matt Hardy in a Big Money Match Getting into Hangman's struggles would take too long, but he's an alcoholic dealing with the broken friendships that he helped ruin. He started hanging out with the Dark Order (a cult full of lovable idiots), but refused to join them. Meanwhile, Matt Hardy has been able to get his claws into the tag team Private Party and signed them to a contract where he manages them, but he gets 30% of their earnings. Since he and Hangman are buddies, he tried to take advantage of him and convince him to sign the same kind of contract. Hangman is a functional alcoholic and saw through Matt. He tricked him into signing a different contract: one for a match where if Matt lost, Hangman would get all of his first quarter earnings. Matt convinced him to make it go both ways, so if Matt wins, he gets all of Hangman's first quarter earnings. Miro and Kip Sabian vs. Best Friends (Orange Cassidy and Chuck Taylor) Kip Sabian and the love of his life Penelope Ford announced they were getting married and the best man was revealed to be Miro (WWE's Rusev). The tag team bonded over their love of video games. The trio Best Friends accidentally busted up Kip's favorite arcade machine during a match, making them targets of revenge. Best Friend Trent was injured in a brawl while Chuck Taylor lost a match that forced him into being Miro's butler. As Miro's butler, Chuck was able to sabotage the Kip/Penelope wedding. So... wrestling match. Riho and Thunder Rosa vs. Dr. Britt Baker and TBA AEW doesn't have enough women's matches on the reg, so here's one for the pre-show.
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Mar 8, 2021 00:42
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Ryo Mizunami's match with Maki Itoh was one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. The two of them had a lot of fun with that match and mugging into the camera. Go break Hikaru's nose, Ryo!
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Mar 8, 2021 01:01
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Happy to have anyone watching the PPV tonight join us in PSP! https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3961395
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Mar 8, 2021 01:09
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I don't know anything about the guy but a wrestler who takes his name from Darby Crash and G.G. Allin probably has sepsis and needs to go to the hospital
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Mar 8, 2021 01:31
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A Pack of Kobolds posted:I don't know anything about the guy but a wrestler who takes his name from Darby Crash and G.G. Allin probably has sepsis and needs to go to the hospital You have no idea who right you are.
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Mar 8, 2021 02:02
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The best thing to ever happen in wrestling just happened
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Mar 8, 2021 02:05
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Rarity posted:The best thing to ever happen in wrestling just happened The Rock and Sock Connection joined AEW?
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Mar 8, 2021 02:17
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Vince died?
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Mar 8, 2021 03:46
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Ppv is really great so far
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Mar 8, 2021 03:51
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I'm still laughing at the ring exploding.
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Mar 8, 2021 05:47
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It was so cute. https://twitter.com/WAWN_Wrestling/status/1368785375003619329?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
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Mar 8, 2021 05:49
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mallratcal posted:It was so cute. lmao
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Mar 8, 2021 05:56
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