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Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:Were u hurt I got a lil turdburn on my chest, but otherwise just my pride
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Mar 2, 2021 20:35
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| # ? May 5, 2024 21:24 |
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Alright guys who bought my wife an account
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Mar 2, 2021 20:40
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Ventral EggSac posted:I got a lil turdburn on my chest, but otherwise just my pride God bless that u were not harmed
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Mar 2, 2021 20:41
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Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:God bless that u were not harmed Thank you, truly it's in these times that it seems like God has abandoned me to pull turds out without Holy Assistance
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Mar 2, 2021 20:55
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You know how the mathematician solved his constipation? He worked it out wigh a pencil! 
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Mar 2, 2021 21:52
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Phew, I hope the sewage company can cope because that's gonna be a danger to shipping if it hits the open water.
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Mar 7, 2021 05:15
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I don't poop. Only girls poop because girls are DISGUSTING
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Mar 7, 2021 05:16
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Aardvark! posted:I don't poop. Only girls poop because girls are DISGUSTING Goil
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Mar 7, 2021 05:17
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Ugh just did a lot 19 incher I need a Gatorade and a nap.
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Mar 7, 2021 05:18
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if it doesnt get in your hair youre not doing it right.
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Mar 7, 2021 06:31
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I did such a big poo poo yesterday I ordered a new toilet brush, I know I've broken a seal and from now on we need the proper stuff
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Mar 7, 2021 08:52
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Jove Tone posted:You know how the mathematician solved his constipation? He worked it out wigh a pencil! Post of the year IMO.
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Mar 7, 2021 09:45
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You ever push a poop so hard you go light headed for a second?
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Mar 7, 2021 10:36
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*chestburster scene but with poop* mama mia!!!
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Mar 7, 2021 10:54
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Chrs posted:You ever push a poop so hard you go light headed for a second? ever since I stopped drinking beer, my poops have been quite solid and a bit scary in some ways
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Mar 7, 2021 11:05
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*groans* Oh god. *Slaps thighs as face turns red* gently caress. *Bites knuckle* What did I eat?!? *Pants for breath between begging sobs* Please, no more. *Colon feels like it's on fire* AAAAAARGH-uh *A single nugget the size of a marble hits the porcelain* That was it?
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Mar 7, 2021 13:45
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Welp looks my enormous butthole (5 inches) wasn't even large enough and I had to tear a new one
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Mar 7, 2021 14:36
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When is poo poo going to stop, I've been sitting there for 20 minutes and all this time I was making moist brown cake with my rear end and there is no sign of the end of this It's the beets I've been eating for four days straight? Or the new green tea I bought? It just keeps going on goddamn
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Mar 8, 2021 22:36
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You know you’re in trouble when you flush and all the toilet roll goes down but the poop just stays where it was
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Mar 8, 2021 23:02
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I freeze my gross protien shake turds and mail them in old omaha steak coolers to anyone dumb enough to give me their physical address
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Mar 8, 2021 23:57
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i had food poisoning one time and as soon as i finished taking a poo poo i got off the toilet real fast cause i had to throw up so i got on my hands and knees and was throwing up but on an especially violent heave i had a bunch of diarrhea also squirt out of my rear end and all over my calves and ankles and my pants and underwear i still had around my ankles. then the gf opened the door to check on me and got a face full of my poop legs and butt and me in a puddle of my own filth on the bathroom cause my butt was pointed right at the door. i was cleaning out the bathroom tiles with an old toothbrush for like a week to this day whenever i think i have to throw up like if im sick or hungover or whatever, i sit on the toilet like im going to poop and hold a trash can in my lap and throw up into that instead.
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Mar 9, 2021 02:08
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its_my_birthday posted:i had food poisoning one time and as soon as i finished taking a poo poo i got off the toilet real fast cause i had to throw up so i got on my hands and knees and was throwing up but on an especially violent heave i had a bunch of diarrhea also squirt out of my rear end and all over my calves and ankles and my pants and underwear i still had around my ankles. then the gf opened the door to check on me and got a face full of my poop legs and butt and me in a puddle of my own filth on the bathroom cause my butt was pointed right at the door. Post of the Year 2021
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Mar 9, 2021 02:10
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i think it was from the car pizza. i was supposed to be dieting with my gf so i didnt want her to know i ordered a large pizza while she was working on one of my days off so i didnt want to put it in the fridge or trash--places she could see it--and it was super cold outside so i was like well i bet the inside of my car will keep it cold like a refrigerator and then i got it from my car the next day to finish eating it
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Mar 9, 2021 02:24
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 Goddamn
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Mar 9, 2021 02:27
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poo poo so big I gotta stand up te get offer it
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Mar 9, 2021 02:27
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its_my_birthday posted:i think it was from the car pizza. i was supposed to be dieting with my gf so i didnt want her to know i ordered a large pizza while she was working on one of my days off so i didnt want to put it in the fridge or trash--places she could see it--and it was super cold outside so i was like well i bet the inside of my car will keep it cold like a refrigerator and then i got it from my car the next day to finish eating it 
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Mar 9, 2021 02:32
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its_my_birthday posted:i think it was from the car pizza. i was supposed to be dieting with my gf so i didnt want her to know i ordered a large pizza while she was working on one of my days off so i didnt want to put it in the fridge or trash--places she could see it--and it was super cold outside so i was like well i bet the inside of my car will keep it cold like a refrigerator and then i got it from my car the next day to finish eating it Lmao hell yeah dude
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Mar 9, 2021 02:34
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its_my_birthday posted:i think it was from the car pizza. i was supposed to be dieting with my gf so i didnt want her to know i ordered a large pizza while she was working on one of my days off so i didnt want to put it in the fridge or trash--places she could see it--and it was super cold outside so i was like well i bet the inside of my car will keep it cold like a refrigerator and then i got it from my car the next day to finish eating it Auto e. coli’c rear end ripsiation
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Mar 9, 2021 02:37
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Blueberries are the superfruit my commode needs.
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Mar 9, 2021 02:37
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I like to pre-tear lengths of toilet paper, the number of them based on my assessment of the poop in progress and then see if I got it right.
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Mar 9, 2021 02:46
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| # ? May 5, 2024 21:24 |
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Gotta eat a kale salad just to have an uncompromising need to poo poo 20 minutes later.
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Mar 9, 2021 02:53
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