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Ccs posted:I’ll always have a lot of nostalgia for this series. At least half the movies were great fun and the books are a wonderful read. My second grade teacher read the first one to our class before the series had really taken off so it was quite something to watch it grow into this world encompassing franchise over the years. And tragic to watch the creator own herself repeatedly in Graham Linehan esque fashion. It’s almost a gift that everything Wizarding World since then has been underwhelming or straight up bad. That's some absolutely sick as gently caress artwork.
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Mar 10, 2021 05:19
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Guy A. Person posted:The 6th movie does recast Lavender as a white girl as soon as she has to make out with one of the leads which is pretty hosed. No telling if Jo had any part of either the original or recasting tho. by all accounts this is just a very big 'oops' where they didn't give a poo poo about the casting of background characters and they didn't get an actual actor until lavender mattered at all to the story.
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Mar 10, 2021 09:15
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White Lavender was actually the daughter of Chris Columbus, director of the first two (and also of Home Alone lol). I'll give a movie six a lot of leeway for giving us Alan Rickman in eyeliner and Dan Radcliffe doing spider mandibles tho. But listening to the podcast and re-reading along, in general, I'm reminded of the actual good parts of these dumb books. The whimsical boy wizard poo poo is great. I think Dumbledore exemplifies the dichotomy the most. I love the guy in chapters like Mirror of Erised when he's just our funny wizard grandpa in a big pointy purple hat, and he loving sucks when he's spymaster/terrorist leader/god-king of wizarddom. By seven we literally get Harry up on the cross going "father oh father why have you forsaken me" and Hermione telling him "Harry, Dumbledore has a plan. He loves you I know he does!" Edgar Allen Ho fucked around with this message at 14:44 on Mar 10, 2021 |
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Mar 10, 2021 14:29
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:By seven we literally get Harry up on the cross going "father oh father why have you forsaken me" and Hermione telling him "Harry, Dumbledore has a plan. He loves you I know he does!" For real though. My last favorite part of book seven is how much of it relies on this insane series of assumptions and assessments made by an old stinky asshat who was too loving dumb not to immediately put a cursed ring on his own finger even though he could take that poo poo back to his magic castle full of ancient wizard knowledge and some of the most educated and powerful magic users in England and literally any of them would give it a once over for him even if "the smartest wizard of his age" was feeling too loving self centered and lazy to do even the most basic due diligence.
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Mar 10, 2021 14:49
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the absolute worst part of book 7 is how it hinges on a bunch of wand loyalty bullshit that was never discussed previously. not even a hint that wands changing owners is a thing, in fact, strong evidence to the contrary is present through the rest of the series! you'd think ollivander might hand his customers a pamphlet about the topic if your wand might decide it likes somebody else better for a variety of obscure reasons
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Mar 10, 2021 16:40
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Jazerus posted:the absolute worst part of book 7 is how it hinges on a bunch of wand loyalty bullshit that was never discussed previously. not even a hint that wands changing owners is a thing, in fact, strong evidence to the contrary is present through the rest of the series! Pff how's he gonna ever sell somebody a second wand if he goes and gives away his whole business model?
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Mar 10, 2021 17:05
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The wand plan ties in perfectly with how ridiculous Dumbledore becomes. Because here's the thing: at the end, Harry learns all of Dumbedore's scheming. And he thinks "drat, Dumbledore's master plan was so genius." And in purgatory, ghost Dumbledore tells us "the one flaw was I meant Severus to have the god-tier wand, I hosed that up, poor greasy fucker." Except wait. That means if Dumbledore's plan went off without a hitch, Voldemort would have won. The wand went Grindelwald-Dumbledore-Draco-Harry. Voldemort's miscalculation is he wasn't there to see that it was Draco, not Snape, who defeated Dumbledore in honourable combat or whatever the wand cares about. He's actually on the same page as Dumbledore, he never considered that Draco would have the guts to actually shoot wizard-god. The plan was Grindelwald-Dumbledore-Snape. Voldemort has actually successfully puzzled out Dumbledore's master plan, and, assuming Snape had been the one to beat Dumbledore, Voldemort would have become master of the wand and successfully shot Harry in their final battle.
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Mar 10, 2021 17:14
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I feel like there's a few reasons it wouldn't be common knowledge. One big one going into Hogwarts is that it's probably a bad idea to tell a bunch of kids that they can gently caress up each other's ability to use their wands by stealing them (although, this doesn't explain why someone like Lucius never told Draco since it's the exact type of poo poo he does in earlier books so Draco constantly has the upper hand against his peers). Another is that -- outside the Order and the death eaters -- the vast majority of wizards are non-combatants and/or totally gormless so it's not something that's likely ever to come up, and would likely just lead to a bunch of annoying questions for wizard IT (e.g. "if I forget my wand on the bus and a stranger hands it to me, do they own it now??"). But yeah it absolutely should have come up sooner particularly in both books 2 and 5 where kids are practicing Expeliarmus and wands are flying all over the goddamn place.
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Mar 10, 2021 17:20
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When I first started reading Harry Potter when I was a wee lad, I always had a habit of not reading the description of characters 100% properly in books for some reason. In my minds eye Dumbledore looked like the Sultan from disneys Aladdin, and Snape looked like Jafar, and honestly I think child me nailed it. 
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Mar 10, 2021 17:37
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Guy A. Person posted:I feel like there's a few reasons it wouldn't be common knowledge. One big one going into Hogwarts is that it's probably a bad idea to tell a bunch of kids that they can gently caress up each other's ability to use their wands by stealing them (although, this doesn't explain why someone like Lucius never told Draco since it's the exact type of poo poo he does in earlier books so Draco constantly has the upper hand against his peers). Another is that -- outside the Order and the death eaters -- the vast majority of wizards are non-combatants and/or totally gormless so it's not something that's likely ever to come up, and would likely just lead to a bunch of annoying questions for wizard IT (e.g. "if I forget my wand on the bus and a stranger hands it to me, do they own it now??"). personally i choose to presume that you can never lose ownership of a wand (other than the elder wand, which seems more sentient than the rest), but a wand can choose to accept additional masters and seizing the wand in combat virtually guarantees its allegiance. the elder wand detected that another wand owned by its master was being wielded by harry and said "oh, okay, dude beat the gently caress out of my master so gently caress that guy" and accepted harry, not in some metaphysical way at the moment that harry disarmed draco, but during the final battle. it's the only way any of it can make sense in the context of expelliarmus being a trivial, basic spell
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Mar 10, 2021 17:47
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Wasn't wand allegiance just a thing for that elder wand? I don't think it was a thing for wands in general correct?
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Mar 10, 2021 18:10
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do wands have more agency/rights than elves?
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Mar 10, 2021 18:11
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Nitrousoxide posted:Wasn't wand allegiance just a thing for that elder wand? I don't think it was a thing for wands in general correct? Nope, the intro for the whole wandlore thing is Draco's former wand working for Harry and Bellatrix's working for Hermione, after the Malfoy Manor kerfuffle and Dobby's death
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Mar 10, 2021 18:18
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Tulip posted:do wands have more agency/rights than elves? Without a doubt.
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Mar 10, 2021 18:20
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Come to think of it Chamber of Secrets would've been a great time to drop all the wand information. There's a running plot point of Ron's wand sucking because the willow broke it and his family is poor, there's the wonderful Snape duel scene with the introduction of expelliarmus, and there's Lockhart's backfiring memory charm right before the climax. Dump the "lol Ron is poor" poo poo, have Lockhart be wandless because Snape demolished him and that wand prefers Snape now, and then in the toilet tunnels, have Lockhart's charm gently caress up because he just stole Ron's wand instead of defeating Ron in glorious single combat Hire me for the gritty reboot HBO Edgar Allen Ho fucked around with this message at 18:29 on Mar 10, 2021 |
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Mar 10, 2021 18:27
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"Hey kids, sign up here for the dueling club!" "Aw man, that sounds awesome! I'm going to... wait, what's this incredibly small print at the bottom of the signup sheet? ...Eh, probably nothing to worry about." All participants of dueling club activities acknowledge the risk of losing the loyalty of their wand should they be disarmed, defeated, humiliated, or in any way bested by another duelist. Hogwarts and Gilderoy Lockhart are not responsible for any accidents or failing grades caused by poor wand performance as a result of loss of wand loyalty.
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Mar 10, 2021 18:32
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The end would work a lot better if she'd just stuck with their souls being bound together and Harry not having a maimed Nazi soul as the reason instead of wussing out at the last and pulling bullshit wandlore out of her rear end. Like at the end Voldemort literally can't kill Harry but he asks the unbeatable wand to do just that so it dumps him to save face. Algol Star fucked around with this message at 19:23 on Mar 10, 2021 |
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Mar 10, 2021 19:21
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In Rowling's world, fascism is defeated through understanding the minutia of obscure legal technicalities. It's got a lot of the same energy as all the "here's how Hillary can actually become president" stuff that floated around after 2016.
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Mar 10, 2021 21:01
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Mar 10, 2021 21:33
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:The wand plan ties in perfectly with how ridiculous Dumbledore becomes. Because here's the thing: at the end, Harry learns all of Dumbedore's scheming. And he thinks "drat, Dumbledore's master plan was so genius." And in purgatory, ghost Dumbledore tells us "the one flaw was I meant Severus to have the god-tier wand, I hosed that up, poor greasy fucker." Dumbledore's plan hinged on Snape killing Dumbledore on Dumbledore's orders, which would have meant that Dumbledore would have died undefeated, and the power of the Elder Wand would have been broken by that. Draco disarming Dumbledore before Snape reached them screwed that up since it caused the Elder Wand to recognize Draco as its new master.
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Mar 10, 2021 22:12
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Remember when Harry decided to join the wizard cops because his beloved professor Alastair "Mad-Eye" Moody told him he should, and then when Harry learned that that wasn't Moody at all but rather a cackling, cartoonishly evil shapeshifting servant of snake hitler, the former person who shot Harry's parents before his eyes, neither Harry nor any of his friends, teachers, or supporters ever stopped and thought for a single moment about whether maybe the wizard cops should be reformed a bit? Edgar Allen Ho fucked around with this message at 22:20 on Mar 10, 2021 |
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Mar 10, 2021 22:15
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I'm imagining Dumbledore explaining at length to his wand how he is explicitly instructing Snape to murder him tomorrow and that more importantly Snape is bitchmade and so the wand shouldn't respect him no matter how things might look.
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Mar 10, 2021 22:16
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I've thought, written, and read the word "Dumbledore" way too many times today and now I'm trying really hard not to giggle about it in public (under a mask of course) dumbledore It is a funny name
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Mar 10, 2021 22:32
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realized i accidentally paid for a month of peacock before cancelling it. think i might watch the movies again, it's been years/since release deciding if ill do it with rifftrax or not 
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Mar 10, 2021 22:36
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Remember when Harry decided to join the wizard cops because his beloved professor Alastair "Mad-Eye" Moody told him he should, and then when Harry learned that that wasn't Moody at all but rather a cackling, cartoonishly evil shapeshifting servant of snake hitler, the former person who shot Harry's parents before his eyes, neither Harry nor any of his friends, teachers, or supporters ever stopped and thought for a single moment about whether maybe the wizard cops should be reformed a bit? The best part is that he's told that right after Crouch finds out Harry has all the information he needs to solve the mystery and completely ruin his plan, but has taken it and run in the exact opposite direction. "You'd make a great detective kid."
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Mar 10, 2021 22:38
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:running plot point of Ron's wand sucking because the willow broke it It would be awesome if the whomping willow had a wand of its own.
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Mar 10, 2021 23:04
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Buttchocks posted:It would be awesome if the whomping willow had a wand of its own. lmao
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Mar 10, 2021 23:05
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:Remember when Harry decided to join the wizard cops because his beloved professor Alastair "Mad-Eye" Moody told him he should, and then when Harry learned that that wasn't Moody at all but rather a cackling, cartoonishly evil shapeshifting servant of snake hitler, the former person who shot Harry's parents before his eyes, neither Harry nor any of his friends, teachers, or supporters ever stopped and thought for a single moment about whether maybe the wizard cops should be reformed a bit? Well, he wasn't actually employed as a wizard cop, he was just using his (fraudulent) record as having been one as the previous work experience on his resume to get a job teaching high school. I think the existence of multiple evil wizards who schemed and plotted to get ultimate power to take over the world and kill a lot of people justifies the existence of having people to track down and stop those wizards, but what's more questionable is how I don't think ever through the course of the books is there an actual named wizard cop actively employed and working as a wizard cop, and instead the governmental response to evil wizards with turbo evil wizard powers seems to be first denial and then total capitulation. There's a private group (militia?) dedicated to fighting the evil wizard that includes former wizard cops who aren't actively working for the government in any official capacity, but so far as I know, the only people actively enforcing wizard law in the books as agents of the wizard government are the literal soulsucking demons.
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Mar 10, 2021 23:13
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SlothfulCobra posted:Well, he wasn't actually employed as a wizard cop, he was just using his (fraudulent) record as having been one as the previous work experience on his resume to get a job teaching high school. Kingsley, the dude who gets field promoted to Minister of Magic after Voldemort's defeat because thats a thing I guess? Is an active Auror and member of the private militia group simultaneously. Tonks was as well up until she died. Also Arthur Weasley is apparently enough of a cop to go on multiple raids against people enchanting muggle artifacts and arrest them. There's mention of him doing 7 in one night in one of the books.
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Mar 10, 2021 23:18
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Arthur is essentially wizard ATF
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Mar 10, 2021 23:25
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Iirc some of the other order folks are still actively employed as wizard cops, like Tonks and Kingsley Shacklebolt. That's kinda the whole failure of JK's worldview: everything almost gets there, but it turns out, there was no problem with the status quo. Once the good wizard cops shoot the evil snake guy (or rather trick him into shooting himself) and install one of their own as leader, it's all fine, and there need not be any reflection about how easily the evil snake nazis infiltrated everything and took control. The story would be a lot better if the Dumbledore side had been driven underground and had to work outside the law, instead of them just being the good half of the government.
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Mar 10, 2021 23:25
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It's time we admit that Arthur Weasley has a crippling addiction to gambling.
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Mar 10, 2021 23:36
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reignofevil posted:It's time we admit that Arthur Weasley has a crippling addiction to gambling. arthur spends half his paycheck on valuable muggle artifacts that some bozo picked up for 5 pounds at the grocery store and then resold for 50 galleons
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Mar 10, 2021 23:40
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His name is Mundungus Fletcher, tyvm
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Mar 10, 2021 23:42
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Arthur’s addiction got passed to his sons though, and Fred and George scammed the hell out of Ludo Bagman
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Mar 10, 2021 23:46
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Love it when my rapscallion brothers are blackmailing a bankrupt government official.
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Mar 10, 2021 23:48
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i'm arthur weasley and i pay 20 galleons for a toilet plunger that i don't understand and will never use
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Mar 10, 2021 23:48
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I love that in the canon sequel play you find out that Lucius Malfoy got to stay rich and fund the creation of a better time turner to bring back Voldemort. Like why wouldn’t you seize that guy’s assets and throw him in prison? There apparently wasn’t even a wizard version of the Nuremberg trials after Voldemort’s defeat
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Mar 11, 2021 02:11
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It doesn't even make sense why Lucius would do that. Like, the whole thing we learn in Book 7 in that Voldemort walked all over Lucius, stole his house to set up his evil lair, and is keeping his wife and child as thinly veiled hostages because Lucius has been such a colossal fuckup. I get that he's a nazi, but you'd think if he actually got to keep all his wealth and power after all the Voldemort poo poo blew over, he'd just count himself lucky and go back to trying to keep non purebloods out of higher government positions. But nah gotta throw all my wealth towards resurrecting Hitler, even after Hitler literally held my family at gunpoint while squatting in my house and flipping me the bird.
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Mar 11, 2021 02:21
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Somewhere Lucius has a 76 step plan where like ten steps in he resurrects Voldemort and then somewhere around step 58 he overthrows Voldemort. After that he probably achieves his ultimate goal of displacing Hagrid and he takes a senior position on the schoolboard with veto power on letting anybody else join.
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Mar 11, 2021 02:25
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