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ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/Reductress/status/1380973940290560001

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zoux
Apr 28, 2006

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1381597985180647426

Baron von Eevl
Jan 24, 2005

WHITE NOISE
GENERATOR

🔊😴

This is going to be like that "gently caress it, we're doing 5 blades" one and end up being true.

doctorfrog
Mar 14, 2007

Great.

https://www.theonion.com/nation-s-gimps-crawl-on-washington-demanding-unfair-tre-1846599479

quote:

“Tread on me!”

Only registered members can see post attachments!

doctorfrog has a new favorite as of 20:40 on Apr 12, 2021

One Nut Wonder
Mar 17, 2009

Baron von Eevl posted:

This is going to be like that "gently caress it, we're doing 5 blades" one and end up being true.

Deal of the Week at Walgreens! 2/$1

Offer valid only with myWalgreens account.

One Nut Wonder
Mar 17, 2009
Double post.

New Arkansas Bill Would Require Teen Residents To Keep Genitals On Full Display At All Times

https://www.theonion.com/new-arkansas-bill-would-require-teen-residents-to-keep-1846651631

Gizmo Chicken
Feb 17, 2011

Yep.
Kelly strikes again:

The MSJ
May 17, 2010

Oh God. Jerry Lee Lewis with a child in heaven.

Baron von Eevl
Jan 24, 2005

WHITE NOISE
GENERATOR

🔊😴
Yeah, I assume that's his wife that was his 14 year old first cousin when they got married, not the wife that he murdered.

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1382121489680494593

Arist
Feb 13, 2012

who, me?


An old favorite recently appeared in my timeline:

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1382872628763971585

zoux
Apr 28, 2006

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1383110871707230209

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1383125607224053767

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1383065039058391049

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1383067671332327427

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang




:drat:

Untrustable
Mar 17, 2009





The MSJ posted:

Oh God. Jerry Lee Lewis with a child in heaven.

Jerry Lee Lewis is somehow, against all odds, still alive.

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1384220386406014989

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1384518737085276162

The MSJ
May 17, 2010

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKRn_pltdDc

Last Chance
Dec 31, 2004


Lol

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1387085418953379842

StandardVC10
Feb 6, 2007

This avatar now 50% more dark mode compliant
Nation's Bald Citizens Demand Their Heads Stop Being Used as Bongos

Omnomnomnivore
Nov 14, 2010

I'm swiftly moving toward a solution which pleases nobody! YEAGGH!

Jet Jaguar
Feb 12, 2006

Don't touch my bags if you please, Mr Customs Man.



https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1388187700130455559

They could have gone with just the headline, but the story is great, too. I like how Major is the new Diamond Joe of the administration.

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1388146311690588169

https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1388207792645939205

Napoleon Nelson
Nov 8, 2012


https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1389950233455570946?s=19

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1125095563332993024

Aramek
Dec 22, 2007

Cutest tumor in all of Oncology!
It's good every year.

Lysidas
Jul 26, 2002

John Diefenbaker is a madman who thinks he's John Diefenbaker.
Pillbug

oof

also: :hmmyes: Masterful Dealmaking: This Man Went Silent For A Week After Rejecting McDonald’s Initial Proposal Of $3.99 For A Big Mac To Put Himself In A Stronger Position For Negotiation

zoux
Apr 28, 2006

https://twitter.com/realpunknews/status/1390094436152008710?s=21

This one took me a sec

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/ClickHole/status/1391785100833005573

Zugzwang
Jan 2, 2005

You have a kind of sick desperation in your laugh.


Ramrod XTreme
https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1392540521583759363?s=20

StandardVC10
Feb 6, 2007

This avatar now 50% more dark mode compliant
No One At Laser Tag Prepared For How Hard Dad Was Going To Bring It

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang




:stare:

Arist
Feb 13, 2012

who, me?


https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1394390186147160068?s=19

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



drat

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012

as a person who never leaves my house i've done pretty well for myself.

Leaf Erickson Day

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.


https://twitter.com/ClickHole/status/1395049440700993542

Good Citizen
Aug 12, 2008

trump trump trump trump trump trump trump trump trump trump

Coulda been worse. Coulda picked Italian

Aramek
Dec 22, 2007

Cutest tumor in all of Oncology!
But Italian is the most delicious sounding language.

jojoinnit
Dec 13, 2010

Strength and speed, that's why you're a special agent.

This got posted in my Expats group today and boy howdy do some people have opinions on what "satire" should be.

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Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012

as a person who never leaves my house i've done pretty well for myself.

The Dutch will never financially recover from this, just like they never recovered from the Franco–Dutch War of 1672.

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