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Grevling
Dec 18, 2016

https://edition.cnn.com/2021/04/20/...aleontologists.

quote:

(CNN)Tyrannosaurus rex was a fearsome predator, but it sure wasn't a particularly fast mover. In fact, most humans could easily keep up with the dinosaur without breaking a sweat.

T. rex would have covered just under 3 miles in an hour -- a speed similar to that of humans and many other animals -- at its preferred walking speed, according to new calculations by Dutch paleontologists. However, this pace is slower than other estimates of the tyrant lizard king's walking speed.


Even the fattest rear end latina would be able to easily escape the prehistoric monster, according to new scientific finds.

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sigher
Apr 22, 2008

My guiding Moonlight...



First feathers, now this.

Meme Poker Party
Sep 1, 2006

by Azathoth
Slow rear end big lizard.

Cubone
May 26, 2011

Because it never leaves its bedroom, no one has ever seen this poster's real face.

Grevling posted:

Even the fattest rear end latina

what

Mr. Meagles
Apr 30, 2004

Out here, everything hurts


lil' movie trivia the jeep in Jurassic Park was actually only going 4 mph so this checks out

rain dogs
Apr 19, 2020

Grevling posted:




Even the fattest rear end latina would be able to easily escape the prehistoric monster, according to new scientific finds.

what if the trex had a hoverboard?what then

Meme Poker Party
Sep 1, 2006

by Azathoth

The big rear end Latina teen chased by a lesbian loving t-Rex on a hoverboard??

Then gently caress???

HELLO!???

ben shapino
Nov 22, 2020

Meme Poker Party posted:

The big rear end Latina teen chased by a lesbian loving t-Rex on a hoverboard??

Then gently caress???

HELLO!???

Guy doesn't know about big rear end latina teen chased by lesbian living T-Rex then gently caress


Shameful

Grevling
Dec 18, 2016

rain dogs posted:

what if the trex had a hoverboard?what then

Even if it did the hoverboard would probably get stuck in its late cretaceous habitat

Robo Reagan
Feb 12, 2012

by Fluffdaddy
i dont believe it. first feathers and now this? these "scientists" are just making things up for more grant money. next theyre going to try and tell us that velociraptors didn't discover space flight and aren't watching us from the moon

Elukka
Feb 18, 2011

For All Mankind
It doesn't say it was slow as poo poo. It says its most efficient chill walking speed was likely around 3 mph, and similar to many current animals.

Also it most probably didn't have feathers.

Grevling
Dec 18, 2016

Elukka posted:

It doesn't say it was slow as poo poo. It says its most efficient chill walking speed was likely around 3 mph, and similar to many current animals.

Also it most probably didn't have feathers.

Further down it says

quote:

Other studies have investigated the dinosaur's running abilities and suggested it could have a top speed of between 12 miles per hour (20 kilometers per hour) and 18 miles per hour (29 kilometers per hour) -- any faster and the bones may have shattered.

That's not very fast for its size and it doesn't say anything about how long it could keep it up, probably not for long before it had to stop and go "ow my bones!"

Poohs Packin
Jan 13, 2019


Because contrary to the racist notions promoted by cartoons such as "speedy gonzales", Latinas are actually quite a slow moving group of people, mostly due to their fat asses.

Charles Bukowski
Aug 26, 2003

Taskmaster 2023 Second Place Winner

Grimey Drawer
Nothing is a match for the endurance hunter that is humans. We ran everything to death and then we hosed it and ate it.

Often Abbreviated
Dec 19, 2017

1st Severia Tank Brigade
"Ghosts of Honcharivske"

Charles Bukowski posted:

Nothing is a match for the endurance hunter that is humans. We ran everything to death and then we hosed it and ate it.

the big rear end latina was chasing the T-Rex??

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER
Nov 11, 2020

H O R S E - S L A U G H T E R E R
dinosaurs sound pretty poo poo tbqh

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER
Nov 11, 2020

H O R S E - S L A U G H T E R E R


i mean look at this stupid piece of poo poo

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER
Nov 11, 2020

H O R S E - S L A U G H T E R E R
hows it suppose dto crawl underneatrh a fallen tree or something with all that poo poo on its back

500excf type r
Mar 7, 2013

I'm as annoying as the high-pitched whine of my motorcycle, desperately compensating for the lack of substance in my life.

Grevling posted:

Further down it says


That's not very fast for its size and it doesn't say anything about how long it could keep it up, probably not for long before it had to stop and go "ow my bones!"

Faster than a person and that's the real problem

Regarde Aduck
Oct 19, 2012

Grimey Drawer

Often Abbreviated posted:

the big rear end latina was chasing the T-Rex??

That’s what it says

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the former President was dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin

"Preferred walking speed".

T-Rex could run, but why should it? Much like Jason Vorhees, the T-Rex will wait for you to trip over a fallen log or trap yourself in a corner or go skinny dipping in a lake. Then it's T-Rex's moment to shine.

Machai
Feb 21, 2013

Often Abbreviated posted:

the big rear end latina was chasing the T-Rex??

How else would they have such a big rear end?

Spazzle
Jul 5, 2003

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER posted:



i mean look at this stupid piece of poo poo

It only has 3 legs!

Mr. Creakle
Apr 27, 2007

Protecting your virginity



It's funny because T-rex went from slow as poo poo back when it was thought to be upright to super fast (40 mph) to sorta slow (10 mph) back to slow as poo poo

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
The next Jurassic Park sequel isn’t going to be nearly as exciting I can tell you that much.

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER
THEY CAN'T PROVE THAT. Take it back!

Poohs Packin
Jan 13, 2019

I read in another study that T-rex had a whiny lil bitch voice and also his mom works at the glue factory.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER posted:



i mean look at this stupid piece of poo poo

That’s not a dinosaur though

Bronze Fonz
Feb 14, 2019




Trex was a chud who slowly stormed the Capitol because he was angry at his tiny hands.

Poohs Packin
Jan 13, 2019

I saw trex at lunch and he dropped his strawberry milk and then slipped on it and his pants ripped and he farded and some poop came out and it got on his gray velcro shoes

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER
You nerds are brave behind your keyboards and trackballs but I bet you wouldn't talk any of this poo poo to Trex's face.

Grevling
Dec 18, 2016

500excf type r posted:

Faster than a person and that's the real problem

According to the website reference.com an average human can sprint at 15 miles per hour so it would be about the same as the t-rex. If you're been spending a lot of time doing aerobics and spinning like big rear end latinas often do you'll have an easy time of it.

Aegis Bear posted:

It's funny because T-rex went from slow as poo poo back when it was thought to be upright to super fast (40 mph) to sorta slow (10 mph) back to slow as poo poo

Going full circle back to the lumbering blobs envisioned when dinosaurs were first discovered.

A Fancy Hat
Nov 18, 2016

Always remember that the former President was dumber than the dumbest person you've ever met by a wide margin

Everybody who is making fun T-Rex needs to GET A LIFE, T-Rex could kick your butt EASILY but chooses not to. His Dad said if he gets into one more fight they're going to send him to military school. That's actually bad news for you because then he's going to learn all the martial arts and how to use weapons like a bo staff or a katana. So even if he was slow, WHICH HE IS NOT, he'd be even more deadly thanks to the power of the blade.

I am not T-Rex but I'm friends with him and he's actually a really cool guy when you get to know him, but you don't wanna gently caress with him or else your life is OVER.

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER

A Fancy Hat posted:

Everybody who is making fun T-Rex needs to GET A LIFE, T-Rex could kick your butt EASILY but chooses not to. His Dad said if he gets into one more fight they're going to send him to military school. That's actually bad news for you because then he's going to learn all the martial arts and how to use weapons like a bo staff or a katana. So even if he was slow, WHICH HE IS NOT, he'd be even more deadly thanks to the power of the blade.

I am not T-Rex but I'm friends with him and he's actually a really cool guy when you get to know him, but you don't wanna gently caress with him or else your life is OVER.

:cheersbird:

Carwash Cunt
Aug 21, 2007

Charles Bukowski posted:

Nothing is a match for the endurance hunter that is humans. We ran everything to death and then we hosed it and ate it.

We haven’t quite killed everything yet, but soon

Poohs Packin
Jan 13, 2019

A Fancy Hat posted:

Everybody who is making fun T-Rex needs to GET A LIFE, T-Rex could kick your butt EASILY but chooses not to. His Dad said if he gets into one more fight they're going to send him to military school. That's actually bad news for you because then he's going to learn all the martial arts and how to use weapons like a bo staff or a katana. So even if he was slow, WHICH HE IS NOT, he'd be even more deadly thanks to the power of the blade.

I am not T-Rex but I'm friends with him and he's actually a really cool guy when you get to know him, but you don't wanna gently caress with him or else your life is OVER.

Why dont you marry trex if you think hes so great

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost

HORSE-SLAUGHTERER posted:



i mean look at this stupid piece of poo poo

uh... wtf are u hatin on my dimo dudes and dudettes????

Lord Decimus Barnacle
Jun 25, 2005


Hell Gem
Scientists? Who cares what they say. What does the Bible day about trex. I’m sure something awesome

500excf type r
Mar 7, 2013

I'm as annoying as the high-pitched whine of my motorcycle, desperately compensating for the lack of substance in my life.

Grevling posted:

According to the website reference.com an average human can sprint at 15 miles per hour so it would be about the same as the t-rex. If you're been spending a lot of time doing aerobics and spinning like big rear end latinas often do you'll have an easy time of it.


Going full circle back to the lumbering blobs envisioned when dinosaurs were first discovered.

I guess if you intend on running forever, literally never stopping, the t rex might not ever catch you

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EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
I'll call him PVT TRex because this guy just held his hands like a trex every time he ran and just kind of hunched it the whole way.
I first met him the night I arrived to DLI and came to the reception platoon where he was at too. He was the platoon guide, which for that platoon means you're the worst screw up and they're punishing you. Somebody leaned over and said "That's PVT Trex, he's PG because he hates black people." and that's how it all began.

Of course we end up getting the same language and same class. He ends up falling asleep every single day, fails every test, and sleeps in late about 2 times every week for formation. When he did show up he'd have ketchup on his face no matter what he had been eating. It could have been cereal in the morning but by formation there he was running up with ketchup on his face.

Eventually they pull him out of class and look at his record and decide that he shouldn't be in the Army at all, so they start kicking him out, only some lady at medical thinks he's not "rehabilitated" enough to leave for the civilian world so he hangs around DLI doing nothing for about 7 months. My friend found him the day it happened. He was crying behind the barraks and the conversation went something like this:

Friend: hey, man, what's wrong?
Trex: They're kicking me out of class
Friend: That sucks
Trex: Plus, I've got like 4 article 15s
Friend: That sucks
Trex: Plus I don't have any friends
Friend: That sucks
Trex: Plus they're kicking me out of the Army
Friend:...That sucks
Then he went to the company and told them to put Trex on suicide watch.


They tried giving him menial work, but he couldn't do anything right. I remember they had him shredding files once and somebody walked in on him taking pictures of peoples' filed with his phone, so finally they just had him sit there collecting a paycheck. Fucker would loom around the company, asking if anybody else failed out so they could join him in the pit.

Somebody asked him once why he always feel asleep in class and his response was "I look at porn all night."
What kind of porn you might ask? Well PVT Trex borrowed somebody's laptop once for a CQ shift and then forgot to erase the history the next day when he returned it. Of course it was filled with furry porn and dragon erotica, as well as lactation fetish stuff. He borrowed another person's laptop and got that taken away by a sgt because he hooked up a private computer to the company network line. When he asked a third person if he could borrow their computer, the third person told him to gently caress off and use a public computer. Trex's only response was "BUT I NEED TO DOWNLOAD FILES." while flailing his claw hands around.


They finally kicked him out 2 months ago and I had to add him on FB just to see what happened to him. Of course every status is him complaining "I'm such a nice guy, why won't girls talk to me?" and "If I wasn't so nice girls would be all over me."
God speed, Trex, God speed.

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