r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

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AreWeDrunkYet: Jul 8, 2006

sebmojo posted:

Honestly, if I read that on a resume it would make me laugh and probably be more interested in an interview

Is anyone even going to get that far down on the resume for the entry level or retail jobs this person is probably applying to?

But yeah, if the employer does get that far and actually reads instead of skimming thats a chuckle and worth an interview.

# ? May 5, 2021 22:31

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 08:54

ghost emoji: Mar 11, 2016; oooOooOOOooh

edit: somebody beat me to it

ghost emoji fucked around with this message at 22:50 on May 5, 2021

# ? May 5, 2021 22:36

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

AreWeDrunkYet posted:

Is anyone even going to get that far down on the resume for the entry level or retail jobs this person is probably applying to?

But yeah, if the employer does get that far and actually reads instead of skimming thats a chuckle and worth an interview.

Unfortunately it turns out she's a vampire with gluten sensitivity, leading to an increasingly convoluted series of sitcom hijinks as she tries to maintain the charade of being a devoted garlic bread fan to avoid disappointing her boss.

# ? May 5, 2021 22:40

Play: Apr 25, 2006; Strong stroll for a mangy stray

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

in the comments she reveals that husband's father was already pitched to for investing - but not by her, by the friend on their own... for some reason

Lol so she's trying to get him to throw good money after bad where his father already invested and is likely to see none of it back, no wonder he doesn't want to listen

SneezeOfTheDecade posted:

AITA because I ate more than "my share" of a 6 foot party sub last night?

that's an evergreen right there. his total bafflement as to why he could be getting blamed for anything really pushes it into classic territory

# ? May 5, 2021 22:45

ranbo das: Oct 16, 2013

SneezeOfTheDecade posted:

AITA because I ate more than "my share" of a 6 foot party sub last night?

I mean YTA for eating a full quarter of the sandwich after already having at least one other serving and OH GOD HE WENT BACK FOR MORE

# ? May 5, 2021 22:54

Ugly In The Morning: Jul 1, 2010; Pillbug

ranbo das posted:

I mean YTA for eating a full quarter of the sandwich after already having at least one other serving and OH GOD HE WENT BACK FOR MORE

It�s easily, easily 5,000 calories.

I used to have to eat 4,000 calories a day when I was super active and it was grueling, I can�t imagine casually eating half a loving party sub.

# ? May 5, 2021 23:00

William Henry Hairytaint: Oct 29, 2011

That dude's obviously got an eating disorder so I find it kinda hard to laugh at him.

# ? May 5, 2021 23:02

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

Play posted:

Lol so she's trying to get him to throw good money after bad where his father already invested and is likely to see none of it back, no wonder he doesn't want to listen

that's an evergreen right there. his total bafflement as to why he could be getting blamed for anything really pushes it into classic territory

The intense focus on his special wings was a sticking point. I wonder how many he made and brought, because unless he made like 10 dozen and a party of 10 people cleaned it all out, that's not even a point in his favor to complain.

It was never clear what a "6 foot party sub" was either. It's not like 3 subway foot-longs, those things are made for parties of 20-25 people so each foot must've been 3-4 servings. Like at best he ate 3 meals equivalent, at worst 8-10.

# ? May 5, 2021 23:03

Owlspiracy: Nov 4, 2020

can anyone help me find two classic posts?

one post is from a husband who's angry at his wife because she tried to ruin her best friend's life (seducing her husband, lying about her business, harassing her boss) and got sued and now owes the friend $50k

another is a series of posts (maybe ATM?) from a manager who is struggling with jealousy of a subordinate and is mean to her, and over a series of posts its increasingly insane consequences like 'i got demoted', 'i got fired', 'i am being criminally charged'

# ? May 5, 2021 23:05

Strawman: Feb 9, 2008; Tortuga means turtle, and that's me. I take my time but I always win.

ranbo das posted:

I mean YTA for eating a full quarter of the sandwich after already having at least one other serving and OH GOD HE WENT BACK FOR MORE

The word 'basically' before 'one serving' speaks volumes. He ate at least 3/4 of that sub.

# ? May 5, 2021 23:12

oh jay: Oct 15, 2012

pentyne posted:

The intense focus on his special wings was a sticking point. I wonder how many he made and brought, because unless he made like 10 dozen and a party of 10 people cleaned it all out, that's not even a point in his favor to complain.

It was never clear what a "6 foot party sub" was either. It's not like 3 subway foot-longs, those things are made for parties of 20-25 people so each foot must've been 3-4 servings. Like at best he ate 3 meals equivalent, at worst 8-10.

I closely monitor what I bring to parties because I want people to like me and the food I like, and I feel really bad on the inside if no one else likes it.

On the flip side, if I'm ever eating out and someone asks if anyone wants to share x, I'll chime in, because they must really want it and they're my friend and my friends must be able to eat the food they want without feeling ashamed or left out.

# ? May 5, 2021 23:23

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

pentyne posted:

The intense focus on his special wings was a sticking point. I wonder how many he made and brought, because unless he made like 10 dozen and a party of 10 people cleaned it all out, that's not even a point in his favor to complain.

I do have to wonder if he showed up with like, a pound or so of wings to a party with 20 people and then was surprised they all got eaten

# ? May 5, 2021 23:33

Pigsfeet on Rye: Oct 22, 2008; I'm meat on the hoof

Soylent Pudding posted:

Was it this thread where someone edited their sibling's resume to have "garlic bread" under the hobbies and interests section?

Hahaha, this reminds me of when I was doing recruiting / interviewing for my group. A guy gave us a paper resume at a job fair, and we liked it, so we asked for a electronic copy. I saved it to my desktop, and one day when I hovered my mouse cursor over the icon, it came up with "Author: CHEESEDICK". My officemate and I laughed for a long time about it and told a number of people about it. We eventually hired the guy, and confronted him about it during his first couple of days. He was mortified. Turns out that when he was installing Word, a visiting friend called him CHEESEDICK and he put that in as the default identity. He said he had emailed out scores of copies, who knows how many people saw it..

# ? May 5, 2021 23:36

Pigsfeet on Rye: Oct 22, 2008; I'm meat on the hoof

Kuros posted:

Today's lesson in: "How to make everyone at work hate you."

AITA for not getting our new team member 2 bowls from Chipotle despite them writing (2x on their order?)

She wanted one for lunch, and one to take home for dinner.

# ? May 5, 2021 23:40

SneezeOfTheDecade: Feb 6, 2011; gettin' covid all
over your posts

Owlspiracy posted:

can anyone help me find two classic posts?

one post is from a husband who's angry at his wife because she tried to ruin her best friend's life (seducing her husband, lying about her business, harassing her boss) and got sued and now owes the friend $50k

another is a series of posts (maybe ATM?) from a manager who is struggling with jealousy of a subordinate and is mean to her, and over a series of posts its increasingly insane consequences like 'i got demoted', 'i got fired', 'i am being criminally charged'

While looking for these (I'm afraid I had little luck) I found some grand old classics:

AITA for going to the American Girl Doll cafe alone?

quote:

I�m 31M. Years ago I went to the American Girl Cafe for my nieces birthday. I didn�t really want to go, but while I was there I ordered the crab cakes and they were actually amazing. I�ve been thinking about them regularly since then. I have no interest in the dolls, just the crab cakes.

Because I figured most people aren�t going out right now I decided to go back to get crab cakes, hoping it would be an empty room with just me eating my lunch in peace. While it wasn�t as crowded, I still felt odd because it was fairly well populated with little girls. I just kept to myself and ordered. The waitress asked when the rest of my party would be joining me. I said I was just there to eat by myself. I could tell this disturbed her. But whatever it�s legal to eat at a cafe, I just like the food there.

Well after I ate crab cakes and 4 glasses of sparkling brut (amazing by the way) the manager came out and said other patrons felt uncomfortable by my presence. I asked if it was because I was a man. They couldn�t answer me. Clearly they assume any man in the American girl tea room is creepy. I explained I�m just a fan of the crab cakes (not even the other food there to be honest, the cake sucks) and I wanted to enjoy a relaxing lunch.

They eventually made me leave (of course I still had to pay) but this feels like discrimination. I was slightly tipsy but not drunk. I am thinking of returning at a later date if I can find maybe a single mom and her daughter who would be willing to go with me (I�m in the process of dating a single mom with a 6 year old daughter and I�d be lying if I said this wouldn�t be a perk) but to be honest the whole experience ruined the restaurant for me. Am I crazy? I feel like I did nothing wrong.

My (25F) boyfriend (25M) keeps asking me to invest in his "soup tube" business idea, and I am not sure how to deal with it.

quote:

I have been living with my boyfriend for about 7 months. Two weeks ago he sat me down and presented a powerpoint presentation with his business idea. I knew he'd been working on an idea, but he didn't want to tell me about it until it was finished. Based on his enthusiasm and his prior seemingly intelligent nature, I thought maybe it'd be a pretty cool idea.

Instead he presented to me an idea about "soup tubes". The idea, if you can call it that, is to construct a series of tubes throughout our city that leads to centralized soup kitchens. For a monthly subscription, a customer can "subscribe to a tube of soup", and a tube extension would be built off the nearest mainline tube and directly into the customer apartment or home. Based on subscription level, that would determine the quantity of soup a customer could pour and how many types of soup. The "tubes" are basically the size of pipes, like you might see under a sink, but he insisted that "it MUST be called soup tube, not soup pipe, tube just zings better."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. At first I asked if he was crank yanking me or something, but he was completely sincere. Obviously, the idea is completely insane. The notion that the city would authorize somebody to construct a series of tubes everywhere that carry soup into homes is of course ludicrous. And even if such an initiative were approved, the costs for such an operation would be ridiculous. You would have to charge outrageous prices for customers to install and "subscribe" to a soup tube, and who would pay for such a service when canned soup costs like a dollar or two? Or you can buy soup from a restaurant for a few dollars? I explained these things as politely as I could but he dismissed them and all said that "tube based soup delivery is the wave of the future."

He then asked me how much I wanted to invest, and I told him nothing, and he looked absolutely heartbroken. Since then, almost every day he has asked again for me to invest, and keeps trying to sell me on the idea. He is also doing the same thing to a lot of his friends.

It is starting to drive me up the wall. First, I am at a loss as to how he can believe such a stupid idea is worthwhile, second it is really god damned annoying to be asked on a daily basis to invest in a system of soup tubes, and third I am also concerned for his sanity. Other than his apparent obsession with this though he has shown no other signs.

I would like some advice as to how I can reason with him, or whether I should even continue this relationship.

TL:DR - My boyfriend wants me to invest in a business venture wherein tubes would deliver soup.

AITA for telling my sister that she should have expected to be outshone by her best friend at her wedding?

quote:

Throwaway because I don�t want any family members finding my real account.

My sister �Anne� (29F) has been best friends with �Ruby� (30F) for as long as I (25F) can remember, so growing up Ruby was like a second big sister to me. One thing that is important to note is that Ruby has always had the most outrageous fashion sense possible. She�s the person that would wear those runway outfits that you think no-one would actually wear.

Anne got engaged pre-COVID. Almost as soon as it happened she started being really weird to Ruby. When she made me maid of honour I was kind of surprised because they�ve always sworn to be the MOH at each other�s weddings, but I am her blood sister so it wasn�t that weird. But I was completely blown away when she made a groupchat and I found out that Ruby wasn�t even a bridesmaid. Both me and my mum tried to talk to her about it since we figured they had an argument or something but she would only say that Ruby didn�t care anyway. I know that Ruby was hurt but she didn�t want any drama so I agreed to let it go. Throughout the whole wedding process my mum kept asking Anne if she would invite Ruby, if she would ask Ruby�s opinion, etc. etc. but Anne refused to have any contact with her or talk about anything wedding-related with her whatsoever.

On Saturday my sister was married. She had a beautiful outside, socially distanced wedding. But she was SEETHING the whole time because of Ruby�s dress. It wasn�t at all outrageous by Ruby�s standards so I don't believe that she wanted to outshine my sister. She wore quite a simple wedding dress but that was her choice! As MOH I of course went to her fitting and that was literally the one she chose.

Anne has been cursing Ruby out and saying that their friendship is over ever since (like she hadn�t been ignoring her all through lockdown �) Finally I just said that she�s been friends with Ruby most of her life and she knows what she dresses like and that she should have expected this?? If it was that much of a problem she should have found a way to mention it to her � OR just made her a bridesmaid.

Anne LOST it with me. She sent Ruby some really horrible messages after she screamed at me. She didn�t say a word to me all of yesterday but she�s badmouthing me to our dad who is on her side. My mum has told Anne that she should apologise to Ruby for the nasty messages she sent and for yelling at me so Anne isn�t talking to her either. I don�t even know what�s going on but Ruby swears on her life that they didn�t have an argument or anything pre-COVID. Anne says that that�s none of my business and I should be supporting my �real� sister. My dad agrees with her and she�s rallied the other bridesmaids against me so idk, AITA?

Just to clear some things up:

Ruby didn't wear a wedding dress or anything really outrageous. It was a dark red, bodycon dress in a satiny material. There were lots of people in form-fitting dresses (the bridesmaids were wearing them!!!) and she didn't look out of place. EDIT AGAIN: some of you people are ridiculous lmao, assuming the absolute worse case scenario. It wasn't a spaghetti strap dress that just barely covered her butt. It was an appropriate length and had long sleeves.If this needs saying twice: the BRIDESMAIDS were wearing bodycon dresses. So were many other guests. It wasn't a particularly traditional affair, nobody was offended by our figures, Ruby's dress didn't massively stick out.Ruby IS very attractive. She always has been but I never thought it was an issue for Anne before.Ruby and Anne had been best friends for 25 years (they didn't grow apart or anything, they stayed in constant contact even as adults) and then Anne suddenly wasn't talking to Ruby anymore. My mum and I weren't trying to be controlling, we were worried! We assumed that something really bad had happened for them to cut contact overnight. When Anne refused to talk about it my mum was only more worried because she's normally an open book.I don't love Ruby more than Anne or anything like that. The only reason I'm so close to Ruby is because ANNE used to be so close to Ruby. They were basically inseperable so I grew up tagging after both of them. Of course I love Anne very much, I just think she's being unreasonable in this situation.Ruby was always going to be at the actual wedding. The phrasing was bad on my part, sorry. When my mum was suggesting that Anne invite Ruby it was to wedding prep things like dress shopping etc.I don't know if "Dave" (groom) has feelings for Ruby. I have never thought that, they've met many times and there's never been any signs that he does. I definitely do not think it is an affair because then surely my sister wouldn't want to marry Dave and neither would want Ruby at the wedding at all. Ruby doesn't have a history of going after Anne's boyfriends or crushes.

UPDATE: Based on some of the advice I'm receiving I was going to tell Anne this morning how much she means for me and that I'm there for her, but she's seething again so I'm not trying to. Dave asked me if I could talk to Anne, because they've also apparently had a massive fight because he tried to defend Ruby on the wedding night. He asked me if I could explain where he misstepped and how to make it up to her. This is the first time he's ever asked me for help with their relationship so he's clearly at a loss. I said I was just as confused and we didn't even know why she wasn't in the bridal party so he should just try and talk it out with Anne.

THIS is when it gets weird. Dave said that the reason Ruby wasn't in either wedding party was because he wanted her as a "Best Woman" and Anne wanted her as a Maid of Honour, but Anne wouldn't budge and said that they should just drop her from both parties to be fair. He said that she explained it to Ruby and that's why they had a fight, because Ruby wanted to be included. I said okay and just hung up but the more I think about it the more confused I am. If they had a massive fight about Ruby being Maid of Honour, surely Ruby would remember? Also, I don't know why Dave would want Ruby as his Best Woman when to my understanding he only met her after he started dating Anne.

I really am taking your advice not to meddle to heart (which is a nightmare because now my curiosity is totally piqued) so I won't bring it up. It's possible that this is all I'll ever know and this will bug me to my grave but I have made a vow not to push Anne anymore on it. Thank you everyone for your comments. Thank you all the NTA people for reassuring me that I'm not the one acting crazy, thank you also to all the helpful YTA/ESH verdicts that helped me see how I could change my behaviour in future to be a more supportive sister.

UPDATE 2: I'm even more confused.

Dave called me up about 30 mins ago asking me (in a very angry tone of voice) if any of his groomsmen behaved inappropriately towards me. I asked what and he asked again. I could hear Anne in the background shouting something. I said that they had been perfect gentlemen at the wedding and that I hadn't had any contact with them since.

He then asked me if Ruby knew that she was meant to be Best Woman. I said not to my understanding but it was possible that I don't know as both she and Anne had been quite secretive about what happened between them and that he'd be better off asking them themselves. He laughed and hung up. Ruby has texted me asking me what's happening and if I knew about the Best Woman/Maid of Honour thing. Just now, I got a message from one of the bridesmaids saying that if Dave calls me I shouldn't answer him. Anne is on the phone to my dad (screaming, it sounds like).

I have no clue what's going on but I think somewhere in this mess is the truth of what actually happened. Everything seems to be exploding, I now think that the bridesmaids or at least that particular one are involved and if things keep happening at this pace I think I should eventually find out what in the flying gently caress is happening!!

UPDATE 3:

There has been a LOT of shouting and tears today, honestly I'm exhausted but so many people have commented for the update so here it is. I�m still kind of in shock. Anne has been lying to just about everyone. The story is VERY complicated and long. This list is actually what I used to wrap my own head around it. It�s all the facts I have in chronological order.

Dave has been to jail and is an ex drug addict. He met Ruby BEFORE he met Anne: after he recovered, he was really struggling with money and Ruby helped him a lot. He considers her to be one of his closest friends.

Two years later Dave was doing well at his job and much more stable and functional. Around this time Ruby introduced him to Anne.

Anne was very reluctant to have a relationship with Dave because of his past but she had strong feelings for him. Eventually they began dating but she was still ashamed of the person he used to be, so she told us that they met over a dating app. Dave consented to this at the time.

As Dave became more comfortable with himself and the relationship became more serious, he told Anne that she needed to be honest with us about his history. She agreed to tell us but she didn�t. She told Dave that she had and wrote a FAKE LETTER from my family about how we were really grateful for his honesty and accepted him. She told Ruby that my parents had reacted really badly, so Ruby never brought it up with Dave or my family because she thought it was still a very sensitive topic.

When Dave proposed, Anne started freaking out about the wedding. Dave wanted people from his support group to be there, Ruby as his Best Woman etc. which would expose the lies. But she still didn�t want to tell us who Dave was or Dave that she had lied to him, so she decided to continue lying instead of coming clean.

So, Anne:

� Pretended to be really upset that she couldn�t have Ruby as her MOH so she could make the argument that that she should be dropped from both wedding parties. She told Dave that she had explained their decision to Ruby and that Ruby had taken issue with it to keep him happy. In reality, she knew that if Ruby knew she was meant to be Best Woman, it could easily get back to me and my mum, and then raise questions from us about Ruby�s relationship with Dave. So she didn�t tell Ruby anything at all and that�s why Ruby was so confused about what happened and couldn�t think of anything.

� Told Dave and all of his friends from his support group that they shouldn�t mention the addiction in speeches or even casual conversation because it was a sensitive subject for certain family members before the wedding.

� Told the bridesmaids SO many lies about Ruby. She told them that she had a habit of causing scenes, that she was going to try and sleep with the groomsmen, that one of them was an ex-boyfriend of hers that dumped her, that she would get way too drunk. Essentially she painted Ruby as a disaster waiting to happen so the bridesmaids wouldn�t like her and also so that they could keep her away from certain people (specifically the ones that also knew Dave) at the wedding.

� Anne also told the bridesmaids that only reason that Ruby was invited is because I idolise her so they wouldn�t repeat any of the lies she told to me.

After the wedding, Anne put on her enormous meltdown about the dress. The bridesmaids obviously didn�t have a very positive opinion on Ruby so they were easy to convince that it was meant as a genuine slight. My dad did what Anne apparently expected everyone to do by caving immediately because she was the bride. If me and my mum had done the same Anne would basically have used it as an excuse to cut Ruby out of everyone�s life.

She tried to do the same thing with Dave�s groomsmen by insisting to him that they had said inappropriate things about the bridesmaids. The idea was to basically remove anybody that knew the truth about Dave from the general social circle so it wouldn�t come up again.

Dave smelt a rat. He asked what exactly the issue was with Ruby�s dress and what exactly his friends had said. Anne panicked and accused him of not loving her, choosing his friends over her etc. and it turned into a massive argument. Dave was mad and very suspicious so he started calling people up trying to figure out what happened.

A couple of the bridesmaids said that Anne was telling the truth about the groomsmen (she asked/pressured them to) but most were kind of weirded out by the request and I think they successfully got that across to Dave. He called me to ask if I knew what was going on. Anne told Dave that I was just like him caring about Ruby more than her, and also that I wasn�t there when it happened, but the timing of the story didn�t match up so Dave called me anyway. That was the weird phone call.

At this point he knew she was spouting BS so he asked her upfront what was going on. She broke down and told Dave everything.

He was fuming. He texted us all to let us know about his past and then basically kicked Anne out. She came to us where she then had to explain again everything.

Anne is absolutely shaken. I never considered her capable of this kind of deception and manipulation and I don�t think she has ever done something like this before.

Contrary to what some commenters seem to believe I don�t hate my sister. I feel sorry for her even though I�m really hurt by what she did because she feels so guilty and absolutely miserable because she�s worried that things will never be worked out with Dave. She�s gone to bed now very upset because our mum won�t even look at her. She�s fuming that Anne would deceive and hurt her and so many other people like this, I do understand where she�s coming from. My dad is also very shocked and hurt.

Anne texted Ruby. She sent her a message explaining and apologising but obviously Ruby is really angry and upset. She just told her that she couldn�t speak to her right now but maybe she�d call her in the morning once they�d both had a chance to calm down.

Dave is probably the most hurt out of everyone and I understand why. He wouldn�t speak to Anne but he did tell me that he really thought that he had our acceptance and that the letter she had written to him had been his most treasured possession ever since he received it and to find out that it was false was absolutely crushing. I told him that we did accept him for who he was and that nobody blamed him but I don�t think it helped much. He has asked for distance from our family and I understand why. I�m not sure when he�ll be willing to speak to Anne again or if he wants to be her husband after this. I wouldn�t blame him if he goes on to find someone else.

Thanks Reddit, it turned out everyone was way off base although I don't think anyone could have predicted this. but a lot of the comments were very insightful and gave me food for thought despite everyone kind of looking in the wrong directions. (Except the weirdos about the dress. You know who you are.)

UPDATE 4

The past two weeks have been very stressful. Anne and my mum have been fighting and crying for most of it.

We learnt that this deception of Anne�s was not out of the blue. She has had this obsession with her �image� for a very long time. She confessed to a lot of stuff from secondary school and her job. Some of it was worrying and some of it was really scary and manipulative. I feel so distant from the person she has become. There�s tension between us that I�m not sure will ever go away, even though it really pains me as well because she's my sister.

Once my dad heard some of the revelations, he decided that Anne should go to a therapist. Anne really struggled against the decision which lead to a massive fight between her and my dad. I�ve never seen my dad so angry, neither has she which is probably why she eventually agreed. The therapist is supposed to help Anne process her emotions after everything that has happened and also hopefully get to the root of her problem.

A lot of the comments suggested that our family wasn�t healthy in the way we interact with each other. I�m conflicted on this because on one hand me and my mum were right that something was very wrong, but then that doesn�t mean that we didn�t behave badly, if that makes sense. So I suggested family therapy. My parents are looking into it, hopefully we can learn a bit more about boundaries and each other and eventually move on from this.

Anne has been talking a lot to Ruby. From the sounds of it Ruby is still very upset, but I have been taking the advice not to meddle so much in their relationship and I am leaving them to it. Me and Ruby still speak a lot but not about Anne.

Dave sent a message two days ago that I think has sadly resolved this very terrible situation. After learning that this is part of a pattern of behaviour, he doesn�t think that he wants to be in a marriage with Anne at all, as he feels that she hasn�t only hurt him deeply but deceived him about the type of person she is. I know from Ruby that he is also seeking therapy and has confided in friends about what happened so he has a strong support system around him. I�m not getting involved with him other than that as I think he deserves distance from my family after everything, but knowing he�s okay does make me feel a little better.

Anne has taken this news badly. When she first got the message I think she had a panic attack, she was breathing really quickly and shaking and crying. She knows that Dave learnt about her past from Ruby and is absolutely furious with Ruby for telling him. She is just as preoccupied with the thought of being �someone divorced� as she is with the fact that Dave is leaving her. I really hope that the therapist helps her get better and although I�m not taking it as hard as my mum, I do feel guilty for not noticing this sooner because she's just not well.

# ? May 5, 2021 23:43

hallo spacedog: Apr 3, 2007; this chaos is killing me
💫🐕🔪😱😱

SneezeOfTheDecade posted:

While looking for these (I'm afraid I had little luck) I found some grand old classics:

AITA for going to the American Girl Doll cafe alone?

Wasn't there some kind of follow up to this one where it turned out he was extremely creepy or am I imagining that?

# ? May 5, 2021 23:48

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

Lt. Danger posted:

I am always in favour of more hygiene but, uh, how are these people wiping that they end up with poo poo on their hands?

Just because you can't see visible streaks doesn't mean there aren't poo poo particles on your hands. Since OP and her husband are probably American, assume he is giving a single cursory wipe with dry toilet paper folded over once at best. (poo poo can penetrate up to 10 layers of toilet paper.) I wonder what kind of doctor he is.

DemoneeHo posted:

AITA for staying neutral in a situation between my son and my daughter + wife

As has come up a lot in this thread, saying you're being neutral is siding with the oppressors. This is a nice clean example. I'm not really sure what the OP's problem is. He hates his son, so sided with the son's bully to harm him, and now the son is not in his life anymore. Isn't that what he wanted?

Owlspiracy posted:

can anyone help me find two classic posts?

one post is from a husband who's angry at his wife because she tried to ruin her best friend's life (seducing her husband, lying about her business, harassing her boss) and got sued and now owes the friend $50k

another is a series of posts (maybe ATM?) from a manager who is struggling with jealousy of a subordinate and is mean to her, and over a series of posts its increasingly insane consequences like 'i got demoted', 'i got fired', 'i am being criminally charged'

The first one doesn't sound very familiar. Do you remember what the friend's business was? Any unusual word to search for will be helpful.

The second sounds more familiar. Do you remember anything specific she did? Were both the characters women in this one? Were pranks involved?

# ? May 5, 2021 23:48

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

hallo spacedog posted:

Wasn't there some kind of follow up to this one where it turned out he was extremely creepy or am I imagining that?

I don't think so. I do remember the thread reading between the lines a little and saying that he was probably not "a little tipsy" after 4 glasses of champagne, and that restaurant staff would eye someone who drank that much at lunch alone by themselves suspiciously no matter where it was and would probably ask him to leave. Him bragging about dating a single mother with a young child while he's the type to lurk around American Doll stores also doesn't help, and some goons mentioned that like everything else, the price of the food there is greatly inflated, so there's no reason someone would want to eat there just for the food and someone who'd eaten there said the crab cakes are the same frozen crap as everything else, so he's definitely got some kind of sinister ulterior motive.

AITA for filling the ice tray with sausage water

quote:

Sounds a little weird but hear me out. So it�s summer on the country I�m living in and I like drinking water with ice because I like chewing on the ice.

So here�s water lead me to do the deed I fill the ice tray everyday in the morning and before I go to bed but I almost close to never have any ice to put in my water while I drink it why you ask because everyone in my family uses the ice, which I absolutely don�t have any problem with but the only issue here is that they don�t fill the ice tray and finish all the ice that has already been made which means 8/10 times I don�t have any ice to put in my water and every time I ask them to fill the tray if they see it empty they tell me it�s my job to do that.

So a few years back I had seen this post or a meme where someone had filled sausage water in the ice tray to serve guests they didn�t like and I thought it was funny so I proceeded to do so now my family is calling me the rear end in a top hat because they think what I did was rude petty and impractical .

# ? May 5, 2021 23:58

SneezeOfTheDecade: Feb 6, 2011; gettin' covid all
over your posts

hallo spacedog posted:

Wasn't there some kind of follow up to this one where it turned out he was extremely creepy or am I imagining that?

You be the judge! His other post, on r/legaladvice:

(IL) I was removed from the American Girl Cafe for my gender. Do I have legal recourse?

quote:

I�m a 31 year old man. I am not a pedophile. A few years ago I was forced to go to the American Girl Doll cafe in Chicago for my nieces birthday and I tried the crab cakes which turned out to be amazing. Since then I�ve had a hankering for them so recently I returned on my own. I indulged in 4 glasses of sparkling brut with the crab cakes but I was not drunk. The staff asked me to leave because I did not have a child with me. I understand it�s a bit weird to be a man in a AGD store but rest assured I was only there for the food. Is this illegal?

(My shirt etc. etc.)

and his comments:

quote:

quote:
>I was removed from the American Girl Cafe for my gender.
>
>The staff asked me to leave because I did not have a child with me.

So which one was it?

I believe if I had been a woman, they would have dismissed me as a fan girl and let me stay without kids.

quote:

Well that�s the reason they hinted....but I think if I were a woman they would assume I just liked AGD dolls.

quote:

No but I think if I was a woman they would just assume I was a collector.

quote:

Could I be removed if I showed up with a child at a later date, and they recognize me?

quote:

If I can prove that my removal caused trauma to the child could I sue?

# ? May 5, 2021 23:59

Pigsfeet on Rye: Oct 22, 2008; I'm meat on the hoof

Invisible Clergy posted:

Just because you can't see visible streaks doesn't mean there aren't poo poo particles on your hands. Since OP and her husband are probably American, assume he is giving a single cursory wipe with dry toilet paper folded over once at best. (poo poo can penetrate up to 10 layers of toilet paper.) I wonder what kind of doctor he is.

As has come up a lot in this thread, saying you're being neutral is siding with the oppressors. This is a nice clean example. I'm not really sure what the OP's problem is. He hates his son, so sided with the son's bully to harm him, and now the son is not in his life anymore. Isn't that what he wanted?

The first one doesn't sound very familiar. Do you remember what the friend's business was? Any unusual word to search for will be helpful.

The second sounds more familiar. Do you remember anything specific she did? Were both the characters women in this one? Were pranks involved?

The second one sounds like a tale from "Ask A Manager" where the team leader shat on a very talented subordinate who had been hired for some very top-level skills. Team leader and entire team got fired, and the ex-team lead was fuming about it.

# ? May 6, 2021 00:01

kru: Oct 5, 2003

I like the idea.of personalised documents, for the business.

Just like, a series of red graphs cratering through the bottom of the pages, but with the guy's name on top, embossed in gold.

# ? May 6, 2021 00:04

Strawman: Feb 9, 2008; Tortuga means turtle, and that's me. I take my time but I always win.

hallo spacedog posted:

Wasn't there some kind of follow up to this one where it turned out he was extremely creepy or am I imagining that?

I think he was just a normal american girl crab cake brut loving guy, but maybe I'm an optimist :shrug:

# ? May 6, 2021 00:05

Peaceful Anarchy: Sep 18, 2005; sXe
I am the math man.

Owlspiracy posted:

can anyone help me find two classic posts?

one post is from a husband who's angry at his wife because she tried to ruin her best friend's life (seducing her husband, lying about her business, harassing her boss) and got sued and now owes the friend $50k

This one, right?

quote:

My (36m) wife (33f) was sued, I'm feeling resentment towards her and I don't know how to move past it.

FWIW This is not a post asking for any legal or financial advice, we already have a lawyer and have help financially. No offense to reddit, but I�d rather not get any legal advice from a forum, but I�m okay getting relationship advice it seems.

As the title states my wife was recently sued, she lost and we had to pay. The money is a significant amount for us, we didn�t have much in savings or our emergency fund to begin with, and both of those accounts are now empty.

My currently problem is trying to move past the resentment and anger I�m feeling towards my wife. Until now I�ve always felt like we were a partnership in our marriage. But, since I�m the breadwinner I can�t help but to feel like I�m spending "my" money on something that isn�t my fault. I�ve had no problem paying the mortgage, and taking care of various financial burdens that come with being a married homeowner. However, I have been the only one to put money aside in our savings and other accounts to prepare for an emergency - like a totaled car, someone loses their job, medical bills, or an act of god� not a stupid lawsuit where I know my wife is guilty. She has a part time job and doesn�t make much money, but pays for smaller things when she can (like groceries and some random bills), but she does take care of a lot of cooking, cleaning and caring for our pets.

What did my wife do? (Note: I had no idea this was going on while it was happening).

She used linkedin to find her former ex best friend, she ended up creating a realistic looking fake linkedin profile with a vague occupation of �recruiter�. My wife ended up sending this ex-best friend, "Laura" a few messages pretending to be a recruiter in her line of work. Laura finally responded thinking that this recruiter was real, my wife wanted her phone number but Laura gave her a personal email address instead. My wife created a second fake linkedin profile and started to send messages to people with similar titles as Laura at her company. These messages said derogatory things about Laura, a mixture of truthful things but embarrassing and just fabricated bullshit to make Laura look bad. Her manager got one of these messages that claimed that Laura was a heavy drug user. Laura's manager talked to her about these messages and he felt like the messages were bizarre and seemed like someone was trying to troll or harass Laura. Well, Laura team had her back and helped her saved these messages. Not only that, but Laura requested that she be drug tested anyway, to provide further evidence that she was clean. My wife didn�t know this at this point, but Laura was pregnant. Several of her coworkers, including her manager testified on Laura behalf.

Using the personal email address she got from the fake recruiter profile, she was able to find a few social media platforms Laura was on and was able to figure out her husbands name. She did some more internet sleuthing and found Laura's husband on facebook. Laura's husband didn�t have much on his facebook profile, but you could see his business email address on it. My wife sent him an email claiming that Laura was cheating on him. The husband confronted Laura about this email and Laura encouraged him to keep responding to this person, and save the messages, as well as to start asking specific questions about this supposed affair. My wife thought she was being clever and ended up telling the husband that Laura was cheating on him during the work week, she even gave him specific dates. What she didn�t realize was Laura had something turned on in google maps where it keeps years worth of historical gps data. Some of the dates my wife gave him also happened to be days where they both worked from home together. She also ended up giving him dates during a time they were on vacation together. Laura had her husband keep responding as much as possible to my wife and to backup all correspondence.

My wife was able to find out when and where the baby shower was going to be. One of Laura friends had created a public registry for her and had the invitation online. My wife decided to show up unannounced (the baby shower took place in a semi-public place, they had rented out an area connected to the public business.) She did not make herself known immediately. Instead she looked for patrons that were entering and exiting the rented out room. She was able to get the attention of a few guests that had never met her and tried to gossip about Laura - my wife was telling people that Laura didn�t actually know who the father was, among other things. This was at an event where her husband was at as well. The word got back around to Laura and she spotted my wife and apparently immediately put together all the pieces of what happened.

I�m leaving a fair amount of information out - My wife was able to find phone numbers, social media accounts and email for other people in Laura circle and sent them messages about Laura on multiple occasions. All the messages were trying to paint Laura in an extremely derogatory light. All the events I�ve mentioned so far took place over a year or so. My wife didn�t think to mask her IP address, so it was pretty easy to find out that all of these made up messages came from the same IP address, ours. Many of Laura's friends and family testified on her behalf, Laura had everyone saved as much digital evidence as possible - and it was a lot.

Laura and her husband hired a lawyer and decided to sue to my wife. They had ample evidence against her. All the saved messages, close friends and even her manager spoke on her behalf, she showed that she went to see a therapist once all the harassment started because she was depressed and anxious, she showed that she and her husband went to counseling after the accusations of her cheating. She even went above and beyond and had more drug tests done to show she was clean and my wife�s accusations were 100% false, and even had a paternity test done to show that my wife was again wrong and chose to lie.

I honestly felt awful for Laura, there were lots of tears on her end. You could tell how much emotional stress she had gone through. She said that being pregnant during the majority of this was absolutely horrific and was worried the stress and anxiety would somehow hurt her baby. She was pained that her one and only baby shower was ruined by my wife and that was something that could never be truly repaid or made up for. And that my wife�s harassment continued even after Laura gave birth and was trying to manage a newborn child.

My wife has never done anything this crazy before. I knew she could be a little petty and jealous of others, especially people she use to be friends with in the past, but it was only talk - no action. We�ve had a very happy marriage otherwise, we rarely fight, have a lot in common, we have a lot of fun together. But, she really hosed up this time. I don�t know how to move forward. I know someone is going to suggest therapy, but I really want to start building up an emergency fund again. We�re pretty screwed financially for awhile.

tl;dr Wife was sued by her former best friend, I emptied out all of our savings and sold a few things to pay for everything. I need help managing my resentment towards my wife and to move past this. Funds are low and we can't afford therapy right now. What can we do to move forward?

quote:

[Update] My (36m) wife (33f) was sued, I'm feeling resentment towards her and I don't know how to move past it.

Link to original: bb6tv5/my_36m_wife_33f_was_sued_im_feeling_resentment/

Note - Please don't make a comment that is hateful and derogatory towards my wife. My post last time was locked because of this and I wasn't able to respond. I'm posting this at work, and I only have a few pockets of time throughout the day where I can respond.

By the time I was able to respond to my first post, it became locked. I read everyone's replies and thank you to those who responded with good advice. I got a lot of DM's and I wasn't able to respond to everyone, but I did read your messages. However, I did not appreciate the many comments that simply insulted my wife, I know she hosed up and I'm still very angry at her, but I want to believe she can heal and become a better a person.

Also, some of the DM's I got were extremely weird & hateful towards women in general, like stuff you see on the incel tears sub - y'all need more help than me and my wife.

There were some common questions I wanted to address to provide additional clarification.

How did she avoid jail?

I only mentioned the civil case since I felt it was the most appropriate to write about because I was originally angry about our financial situation. There was also a criminal case. Our lawyer thought she would originally have to go to jail for 3 months. However, we were able to get her punishment to be community service instead. She has A LOT of community service hours to fill within a year, she will also be getting visits from a PO. Laura and her husband did file restraining orders against her, I honestly can't blame them for that. It helped my wife that she had a clean record and has family that works in law enforcement. I want her to finish those community service hours first before we talk about her working more hours to help pay me back.

Why did she do this to Laura?

That is a good question. I asked her this multiple times over the past several months to try to understand what this woman did to my wife. She would tell me that Laura deserved everything horrible thing that my wife did to her, that Laura was a lovely person, a narcissist, a liar, and just overall a scumbag. But she never really gave specific examples. I've been pressing her for more info, and when she told me some specifics it made me feel sick to my stomach, not because of what Laura did but because how far my wife decided to go due to some petty things that happened in their friendship. Their friendship ended about 8-9 (they had been friends since early in high school) years ago and it was over a man they had both briefly dated. My wife dated "Matt" for a few months, she broke up with him because she thought that Matt had feelings for Laura. Laura said she didn't want to date Matt because he had dated my wife. My wife decided to "test" her friend Laura's loyalty, and told Laura she had her blessing to date Matt. Laura and Matt ended up dating for a few months, my wife stuck around while they were dating and once they broke up my wife told Laura that she had failed a loyalty test. They fought, and ultimately it was Laura who decided to end the friendship. (Note: In case it's not clear, Laura's current husband is NOT Matt.)

Secondly, I was able to get some information from her about what inspired her to do this since their friendship had ended so long ago. My wife said she happened to see (by chance, not by stalking) Laura at a restaurant about ~1.5-2 years ago, and it looked like Laura had lost a lot of weight and was fit. My wife and I are both fairly overweight, and apparently Laura use to be overweight too. My wife admitted that she felt angry that Laura had lost a lot of weight while she had never been able to. My wife was also insulting Laura and said that she doesn't make a pretty thin person and that her new muscular body was too masculine. She also insulted Laura's husband's looks and physique as well. I saw both Laura and her husband in person on multiple occasions - they both look like normal, attractive people who obviously work out. (I could also tell my wife was irritated when she saw Laura at the courthouse the first time, and you could barely tell that Laura had even had baby.) My wife admitted that she just wanted to do some snooping to try to find that Laura wasn't doing well in life, she found the opposite and was jealous of Laura's success. She first found out both of their job titles (they both work at tech companies with some sort of engineering title) and their estimated salaries by using something called Glassdoor, and if that's accurate, then both Laura and her husband make really good money. She also saw a photo on facebook of Laura and her husband standing in front of what appeared to be their very beautiful and large home. She said she was angry because she knew that Laura wasn't deserving of any of this. She proceeded to insult Laura about how she's not that smart, not pretty, not responsible, she claimed that all Laura did through college was do drugs, drink, have sex with anything that had a penis, skip class and failed a lot, my wife said that she's the type who would cheat on her husband, that she's manipulative and is always up to something, etc.

Both Laura and her husband seemed very sad and exhausted throughout the whole ordeal. I never picked up on anything sinister from Laura at all, I felt absolutely awful for her. I felt extreme shame and embarrassment whenever I was in the same room with Laura and her husband. I don't think I was ever able to make direct eye contact with either of them.

So..yeah. I was expecting Laura to have done something truly evil or sinister in the past and that just wasn't the case.

Does she feel remorseful?

I want to say yes, she does. She has been really depressed since this all finalized. However, I can't help but think she's sad only because she got caught. She hasn't directly said anything that would lead me to believe she is truly remorseful.

She's still angry at Laura for escalating to the point of a criminal and civil case, she feels that Laura overreacted. My wife believes every horrible thing she said about Laura. She's convinced that Laura is some kind of alcoholic/drug addict who cheats on her husband, and is the type to lie and cheat her way to the top of her career. And somehow Laura is able to hide this from everyone in her life. My wife felt like she was trying to "expose" Laura for the monster that she is. She feels that Laura pressing charges and suing her is additional proof that Laura is vindictive.

My hope is that she has time to think while she is doing her community service hours over the next year. I think she feels bad that I had to empty out our accounts and sell some things to come up with the money. I talked to her about working more hours once she has finished community service, and she agreed.

Are you going to get divorced?

The thought has crossed my mind, but we've been together for so long and I still love her despite this disgusting thing she has done. I can't see my life without her. But, I know (and I'm having a hard time admitting this to myself) that if she doesn't improve or learn a lesson from this mess then I can't be with her anymore. A lot of people mentioned that if she can do this type of thing to an ex-friend, then she can do the same to an ex-husband. This has me worried some, I'd like to believe she wouldn't go nuclear on me if we did file for divorce. I'll be taking precautions in case I have to defend myself in the future.

Why is she only working part-time?

She is a licensed masseuse and works at a really nice salon/spa. Her hourly wage is pretty high, but she hasn't been able to get the hours she wants at the spa she works at. She could probably get a more full time position at a different spa but with a slightly lower hourly wage, which would still bring in more income than what she is doing now. She really likes the place she is at and doesn't want to leave, but I may pressure her to full time work elsewhere to help pay me back and refill our emergency fund once she is done with community service. At the moment she is onboard with helping me put money back into our savings accounts.

What about therapy?

I know we need this, both as a couple and as individuals to deal with this mess. I talked to her about this and she doesn't seem totally sold on the idea of therapy. I've expressed that I think it would help both us, and she seems indifferent at this point. I've talked to her parents, who are really angry/disappointed in her, they basically begged me not to leave her over this. I told her parents that I think therapy would help both of us, but I can't afford it now. They offered to pay for couples therapy, but that is as much as they would be able to afford, so it's a start. I know my wife will need individual therapy, and if that means I stop going to couples therapy so she can get the 1 on 1 help she needs, so be it.

I'm not ready to call my wife a psychopath as many of the commenters did the last post. I think she got carried away, and thought she was trying to expose someone she truly believed was a bad person. I'm heavily leaning towards that she has had some sort of mental breakdown and focused all of her energy on this one woman and her life. I'm not going to give up on my wife yet. It's very possible that she has some underlying mental illness that could very well be treated with therapy or meds.

How much money was she sued for?

I don't want to give specific numbers, but it will take about 4-5 years to get back to where we were prior to this happening. If my wife takes on a full time after she is done with community service and hands over the majority of her paycheck, it may take less than 4 years.

Are kids involved?

No, we don't have kids and are not planning on having any.

What next?

That's what I need help with. I've sat down with my wife a few times since the post and I can feel some resistance coming from her about starting couple therapy. I think she's irritated at her parents for offering to pay for therapy for us. She has stated that she would rather us solve our problems together without interference from someone she doesn't know. She's afraid she isn't going to like any therapist we find, and that the therapist will attack her throughout our sessions. I've tried explaining to her that the therapist isn't there to blame anyone, that they would try to help us and that it would be a safe space for her to talk and vent about whatever she needs. I've brought up the idea of therapy every night since the post, and each time she has had an excuse along the lines of - it won't help, the therapist will gang up on her, she isn't going to like the therapist/the therapist won't like her, or that we can solve our own problems at home.

tl;dr : I answered a bunch of questions I wasn't able to get to before my first post was locked. But, I really need help pushing my wife to get therapy, she is resistant and isn't convinced it will help us.

# ? May 6, 2021 00:13

Play: Apr 25, 2006; Strong stroll for a mangy stray

SneezeOfTheDecade posted:

AITA for going to the American Girl Doll cafe alone?

This is almost certainly not the full story and you can tell by the way he glosses over what the waiter told him he HAD been doing wrong.

I have no idea what this restaurant could possibly be like, never seen one before but I can definitely see how an increasingly drunk grown man could be disturbing to the other customers. But there may be more to it, for example he may have been looking around at the little girls a bit too much.

# ? May 6, 2021 00:22

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

SneezeOfTheDecade posted:

You be the judge! His other post, on r/legaladvice:

(IL) I was removed from the American Girl Cafe for my gender. Do I have legal recourse?

(My shirt etc. etc.)

and his comments:

I believe if I had been a woman, they would have dismissed me as a fan girl and let me stay without kids.

quote:

If I can prove that my removal caused trauma to the child could I sue?

If this doesn't scream white male libertarian I don't know what does.

# ? May 6, 2021 00:33

wizardofloneliness: Dec 30, 2008

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

Psycho wife stuff

drat, I remember the original post but I didn't know there was an update to that. He was at least acknowledging divorce as an option in the update, so hopefully he eventually wised up and left her. I assume he hasn't posted another update because he's currently in the witness protection program or he faked his own death and and is now living it up in Costa Rica.

# ? May 6, 2021 00:36

Zil: Jun 4, 2011; Satanically Summoned Citrus

wizardofloneliness posted:

drat, I remember the original post but I didn't know there was an update to that. He was at least acknowledging divorce as an option in the update, so hopefully he eventually wised up and left her. I assume he hasn't posted another update because he's currently in the witness protection program or he faked his own death and and is now living it up in Costa Rica.

She has a particular set of skills, she would still find him.

# ? May 6, 2021 00:38

Invisible Clergy: Sep 25, 2015; "Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

Malachi 2:3

wizardofloneliness posted:

drat, I remember the original post but I didn't know there was an update to that. He was at least acknowledging divorce as an option in the update, so hopefully he eventually wised up and left her. I assume he hasn't posted another update because he's currently in the witness protection program or he faked his own death and and is now living it up in Costa Rica.

Or he remained in denial and his wife dealt with him over some minor real or imagined slight.

# ? May 6, 2021 00:39

vonnegutt: Aug 7, 2006; Hobocamp.

Play posted:

I have no idea what this restaurant could possibly be like, never seen one before but I can definitely see how an increasingly drunk grown man could be disturbing to the other customers. But there may be more to it, for example he may have been looking around at the little girls a bit too much.

The American Girl Doll Cafe is a destination restaurant. IIRC there's only one (just checked, there's a handful in major cities). It's supposed to be a tea room where little girls can bring their dolls for high tea. So it's all set up with doll-sized chairs, doll-sized cups, doll-sized desserts. It's mostly just there so girls can get a photo of themselves out with their dolls. I'm pretty sure if you don't have a doll, you can borrow one for the meal.

This is a company that has a "doll hospital" if your doll needs repair. Your doll comes back with a hospital gown, ID bracelet, and some kind of certificate of "good health".

If you're unfamiliar, you really should do a Google images search. It will be much easier to picture how insanely creepy it was for this guy to be getting drunk there.

# ? May 6, 2021 00:41

ghost emoji: Mar 11, 2016; oooOooOOOooh

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

My (36m) wife (33f) was sued, I'm feeling resentment towards her and I don't know how to move past it.

quote:

It helped my wife that she had a clean record and has family that works in law enforcement.

What a shocker

ghost emoji fucked around with this message at 00:45 on May 6, 2021

# ? May 6, 2021 00:43

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

Peaceful Anarchy posted:

This one, right?

My (36m) wife (33f) was sued, I'm feeling resentment towards her and I don't know how to move past it.

The most terrifying part is that she spent a year waging a massive harassment and disinformation campaign, was forced to face up to everything in court, almost went to jail, AND STILL INSISTS EVERYTHING SHE SAID WAS TRUE

I wouldn't ever feel safe sleeping in the same house as someone like that.

# ? May 6, 2021 01:02

CharlestheHammer: Jun 26, 2011; YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!

Though if he divorces her he will create a new supervillain.

So pros and cons

# ? May 6, 2021 01:03

oh jay: Oct 15, 2012

pentyne posted:

The most terrifying part is that she spent a year waging a massive harassment and disinformation campaign, was forced to face up to everything in court, almost went to jail, AND STILL INSISTS EVERYTHING SHE SAID WAS TRUE

"Even if the police falsified evidence, I'm sure they were guilty of something." - her on a weekly basis, probably.

# ? May 6, 2021 01:09

Tokyo Sexwale: Jul 30, 2003

I want to believe my wife can move past this and be a better person even though she went all out to ruin someone's life, got caught and paid dearly, and showed no remorse and still acted like the victim

# ? May 6, 2021 01:10

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

"Sir, I'm sorry but you've had enough to drink. I'm going to have to ask you to pay your bill and leave quietly."

"It'sh not fer'me, it's for the doll!"

# ? May 6, 2021 01:20

Bruceski: Aug 21, 2007; The tools of a hero mean nothing without a solid core.

Pigsfeet on Rye posted:

Hahaha, this reminds me of when I was doing recruiting / interviewing for my group. A guy gave us a paper resume at a job fair, and we liked it, so we asked for a electronic copy. I saved it to my desktop, and one day when I hovered my mouse cursor over the icon, it came up with "Author: CHEESEDICK". My officemate and I laughed for a long time about it and told a number of people about it. We eventually hired the guy, and confronted him about it during his first couple of days. He was mortified. Turns out that when he was installing Word, a visiting friend called him CHEESEDICK and he put that in as the default identity. He said he had emailed out scores of copies, who knows how many people saw it..

Sending out resumes from cocsucker69420@gmail because my bros were egging me on when I made the account.

# ? May 6, 2021 01:33

Owlspiracy: Nov 4, 2020

yep, thats the one! i can't find the other one - i might be remembering it wrong. i think it was from europe?

# ? May 6, 2021 01:34

Mx.: Dec 16, 2006; I'm a great fan! When I watch TV I'm always saying "That's political correctness gone mad!"
Why thankyew!

Owlspiracy posted:

can anyone help me find two classic posts?

one post is from a husband who's angry at his wife because she tried to ruin her best friend's life (seducing her husband, lying about her business, harassing her boss) and got sued and now owes the friend $50k

another is a series of posts (maybe ATM?) from a manager who is struggling with jealousy of a subordinate and is mean to her, and over a series of posts its increasingly insane consequences like 'i got demoted', 'i got fired', 'i am being criminally charged'

Second one was aam and was a trip

quote:

1. I�m jealous of my employee and it�s impacting how I treat her

Before I state my question, I will tell you I am ashamed of myself and what I am doing. It has taken me almost a week to write in to you because of how awful I feel about myself.

I am a manager with a team of a dozen people reporting to me. I have struggled with an eating disorder in the past, and I�m in therapy right now for anxiety and my body image issues. I was doing well until the newest hire started on my team. I feel guilty for saying this, but I am jealous of her and don�t like her. She is attractive, thin, fashionable � everything I am not. I didn�t hire her; my boss, the manager of the department was the one who interviewed her. I never would have hired her if I had been the one doing the interviews.

I know this affecting how I deal with her. Other members of my team have noticed, and I�m sure they believe she is less competent based on my treatment of her. She has mentioned something to my boss about me being jealous, and I am ashamed to admit I lied to my boss about it and used the fact that we have a decade-long relationship to make my boss believe me.

I have learned to act confident in front of people who aren�t my close family or friends, and no one at work knows I about my eating disorder or attending therapy. No one would believe how insecure I really am. I know I need to stop treating her this way and I tell myself I need to be better, but then I see her and my jealousy and dislike comes out. What can I do to stop this and start treating her fairly?

quote:

Thank you for publishing my letter and for your kind response. I would also like to extend my thanks to all the people who responded kindly and gave me encouragement.

I was fired two weeks ago. A client went to my boss with concerns about my interactions with my team member. At my dismissal meeting, my boss told me since it was similar to the complaint from my team member, he spoke with other people on my team. He said half of them thought the same thing as my team member (that I was jealous) and the other half just thought she was bad at her job. Meanwhile, my team member consulted with a lawyer who spoke to my boss�s boss and the legal department. My boss expressed his disappointment in me for lying to him and exploiting our working relationship.

This experience has made me realize I need help. I broke the lease on my apartment and moved back in with my parents for support. My parents and family have been wonderful. I am about to start outpatient rehab for alcohol and marijuana use because I realized I was using these things as a crutch to mask my insecurities. I�m attending individual therapy every other day to deal with my past eating disorder, body image issues, and anxiety and going to two different support groups as recommended by my therapist.

In the comments to my post, some people couldn�t believe my team member went to my boss about my jealousy and there were comments along the lines of �who does that� or �she seems full of herself to think so.� Her complaint was not off-base. I was jealous and I did mistreat her. Her complaint was the truth. She is not full of herself, she complained about something which was really happening to her. I accept responsibility for my actions and understand why I was fired. I caused harm to someone else for no fault of her own, burned all my bridges with the company, lost my friends and ruined my reputation in the industry to point where I will never work in it again. I have only myself to blame. I am ashamed of myself, no one has any idea of how much so. I don�t want to be that person any more. For now I am focusing on my well-being, if things go well I plan to start night classes at the community college later on. One step at a time though. I want and need to get better first.

Thank you for everything Alison. I wish you, your husband and the cats well.

quote:

I know I already sent in my update. I just wanted to say thank you again. I have been doing my therapy and outpatient rehab for three weeks now and I am feeling better than I have in years. I know I have a long road ahead of me and I am not claiming I am cured or everything is okay now but I am feeling good and it is a relief to have everything out in the open.

This is the hardest thing I have ever done and I am just starting, I still have months of rehab and every other day therapy ahead of me. Whenever I get overwhelmed, I read your answer and the supportive comments and I feel better. I showed my original letter to one of my therapists and he commended my self awareness as well as your response.

I have not had any alcohol, marijuana or anxiety medication in three weeks. My doctor may eventually put me back on medication for anxiety but for now I understand what my therapist and the rehab says about allowing myself to feel everything so I can work out my feelings and learning coping strategies. I won�t be drinking or using again though. I can never go back to that.

I have good days and bad ones but writing in to you was probably the best thing I ever did. Thank you again for not making me feel worthless and for giving such a compassionate response. I still read your blog every day and look forward to seeing my update in a future post.

All the best to you. I feel hopeful for the first time in years and it is all thanks to you and your readers.

# ? May 6, 2021 01:56

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

Owlspiracy posted:

yep, thats the one! i can't find the other one - i might be remembering it wrong. i think it was from europe?

I definitely remember it, but dunno how to search for it. Is it not in the compendium?

E: sniped.

# ? May 6, 2021 01:56

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 08:54

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

Mx. posted:

Second one was aam and was a trip

quote:

I caused harm to someone else for no fault of her own, burned all my bridges with the company, lost my friends and ruined my reputation in the industry to point where I will never work in it again.

How loving blatant do you have to be that a client goes above your head like "hey, it seems like your employee is treating a coworker like absolute poo poo"? Most clients don't give a flying gently caress as long as their get their deliverables on time and done right.

That it was bad enough that legal got involved and she's now got a reputation means that her treatment of her was very clearly bullying and harassment to anyone who saw it, toxic enough that no girlboss excuse was remotely applicable.

# ? May 6, 2021 02:17

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: i calmly said its temporary (its permanent)

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