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Pokémon cards. They are collectible, they are for children, and they are serious business. So much so that altercations and pokéviolence are on the rise in war-torn America. "Target Temporarily Pulls Pokemon, Sports Cards As Collectors Turn To Violence" https://www.huffpost.com/entry/target-pokemon-sports-cards_n_609e85eee4b03e1dd388ffd9 US Target stores to stop selling Pokémon cards after rising value prompts threats to staff https://www.theguardian.com/games/2021/may/13/us-target-stores-to-stop-selling-pokemon-cards-after-rising-value-prompts-threats-to-staff "Retailers are pulling Pokemon cards from store shelves after customer chaos" https://www.destructoid.com/stories/retailers-are-pulling-pokemon-cards-from-store-shelves-after-customer-chaos-629181.phtml That's right. Pokémania has gripped the struggling nation so tightly that guns are being brandished in the streets. One resident of failed state "Wisconsin", an obscure American backwater, was forced to defend his cards with force of arms against a horde of pokécrazed would-be looters. quote:If you’re among those who “gotta catch ’em all,” starting Friday you’ll need to catch them somewhere other than Target’s brick-and-mortar stores. Pictured: Surveillance footage of an ambush-style robbery at a Texas Walmart. The unfortunate shopper was relieved of his cards but unharmed. If you have any information about these individuals, please contact the police. Even fast food outlets, long considered the cornerstone of American culture, are not safe from pokémania. American patrons, brain addled from malnutrition and lead gas fumes, have caused chaos and denied innocent children "happy meals" by excessively hoarding the collectible, pokémon themed boxed lunches. quote:Target is the second retailer to take action due to a sudden surge of interest in trading card sales. Several Wal-Mart outlets have also removed Pokémon and other trading cards from their shelves, following aggressive customer interactions. As reported by Nintendo Life, fast-food franchise McDonald's was forced to rethink its strategy involving the distribution of Pokémon-themed Happy Meals, after adults turned up to restaurants and purchased the children's boxed lunches in abundance. Pictured: a young child prepares for a trip to McDonald's. It seems there is no relief in sight for beleaguered America. Supply shortages continue, and international aid is routinely intercepted by warlords and petty criminals, resold to the highest bidder. quote:Trading card values skyrocketed during the pandemic, as demand grew and supply failed to keep up. Pictured: members of the infamous card-tel "Los Squirtles", a group operating throughout the largely lawless Midwest in defiance of local governments. Many wonder how long the chaos can continue, and European governments have started questioning whether UN peacekeeping forces should be deployed to assist in the protection and distribution of aid shipments. On Friday, an official request was delivered from the European Union to the Egyptian government, asking that special dispensation be granted to allow the offloading of approximately 400,000 Pokémon cards currently detained aboard the Evergiven. The ongoing dispute between the Egyptian government and the vessel's private owners have it left it stranded in port. There has not yet been an official response, but one influential Egyptian politician, speaking on the condition of anonymity, commented "suck my pokéballs, you meowthman." More on this story as it develops.
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# ? May 16, 2021 20:19 |
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# ? Mar 29, 2024 01:59 |
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Should've used this one OP
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# ? May 16, 2021 20:21 |
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# ? May 16, 2021 20:40 |
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All the pokemon got covid and died op I'm sorry
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# ? May 16, 2021 20:45 |
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Big Beef City posted:All the pokemon got covid and died op I'm sorry It's super effective
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# ? May 16, 2021 20:46 |
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Goddamn it I've been holding on to my unopened Triple Triad cards for almost 2 decades waiting for them to come storming back and instead it's Pokemon?!
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# ? May 16, 2021 20:57 |
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Coronapokerus
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# ? May 16, 2021 20:58 |
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They got Targets in the kanto region?
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# ? May 16, 2021 21:02 |
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quote:In January, an unopened box of first-edition Pokemon cards set a record at auction, netting a cool $408,000.
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# ? May 16, 2021 21:03 |
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never cared for pokemon but I fear that the waves being made here will be felt by those of us in the beyblade community. stay safe everyopne
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# ? May 16, 2021 21:29 |
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If any of these pokeymans come here causing trouble, I'll send them straight into the shadow realm
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# ? May 16, 2021 21:32 |
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A group calling itself Team Rocket is coming up with increasingly harebrained schemes to steal pokemon cards.
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# ? May 16, 2021 21:52 |
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hand over the bakugan and nobody gets hurt
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# ? May 16, 2021 22:30 |
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William Henry Hairytaint posted:Goddamn it I've been holding on to my unopened Triple Triad cards for almost 2 decades waiting for them to come storming back and instead it's Pokemon?! Lol you dumb BASTARD *Remembers that I bought like one deck or maybe not even that's worth of some kind of vampire tcg in the 90's when the whole brooding vampire thing was taking off but can't even remember the name of and never played*
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# ? May 16, 2021 22:47 |
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A friend was at target a few weeks back amd bought like 4 packs of some sort of baseball cards for 5 bux each and flipped them online for 60 each IMMEDIATELY on eBay. He went back the next day and they were all gone. Pokemon I get, but sports cards?
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# ? May 16, 2021 22:58 |
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ten_twentyfour posted:A friend was at target a few weeks back amd bought like 4 packs of some sort of baseball cards for 5 bux each and flipped them online for 60 each IMMEDIATELY on eBay. He went back the next day and they were all gone. Pokemon I get, but sports cards? That's more of a you thing than you might imagine.
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:01 |
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Why is like everything in an economic bubble right now?
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:01 |
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I think I have a set of gulf war trading cards at my parents house still. Am I a billionaire now? They are opened and some have been licked
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:02 |
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Breaking news: Man's airship burned to ground after several 10-year-olds release highly dangerous animals inside, entire collection is lost save for one card
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:03 |
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Noob Saibot posted:Why is like everything in an economic bubble right now? yea I dunno why is that that after the entire population of earth spent more than a year trapped in their own houses doing nothing but making money niche markets are flaring up its weird oh well *turns anime back on in the dark*
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:06 |
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I wish this whole pokemon business would pokemon GO and die already
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:09 |
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Pokemon go to hell
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:10 |
This further proves why economics is a joke "science" and all economists should be forcibly reeducated to something more productive
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:14 |
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low key sex master posted:This further proves why economics is a joke "science" and all economists should be forcibly reeducated to something more productive Statistics!
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:16 |
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low key sex master posted:This further proves why economics is a joke "science" and all economists should be forcibly reeducated to something more productive I'm not really sure 'Target taking trading cards out of stores' necessarily disproves economics.
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:26 |
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Everything Pokemon is loving stupid, hth.
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:31 |
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Any day now my Killer Instinct cards will be worth thousands
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:33 |
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dracky posted:hand over the bakugan and nobody gets hurt lmao
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:34 |
Big Beef City posted:I'm not really sure 'Target taking trading cards out of stores' necessarily disproves economics. Economist found But honestly if anything has value then nothing has value because clearly people are out of their god damned minds of they're paying anything north of $5 for this poo poo
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:36 |
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Economists are just zealot cultists of the cruel god Econ
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:40 |
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i wish kids would pokemon go to the polls
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:47 |
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low key sex master posted:if anything has value then nothing has value wow drat this is pretty heavy have u told the president abt this?? Seems important?
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# ? May 16, 2021 23:57 |
Big Beef City posted:wow drat this is pretty heavy have u told the president abt this?? Seems important? I got news for you buddy....... I am Joe Biden
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# ? May 17, 2021 00:01 |
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Big Beef City posted:yea I dunno why is that that after the entire population of earth spent more than a year trapped in their own houses doing nothing but making money niche markets are flaring up its weird oh well *turns anime back on in the dark* I don’t think Star Wars:Bad Batch counts as anime....
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# ? May 17, 2021 00:14 |
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The only thing that can stop a bad guy with a Charizard is a good guy with a Charizard.
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# ? May 17, 2021 01:32 |
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low key sex master posted:I got news for you buddy....... wow, sleepy joe himself!
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# ? May 17, 2021 01:53 |
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Future Card Buddyfight remains a safe investment.
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# ? May 17, 2021 01:56 |
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Big Beef City posted:Lol you dumb BASTARD Jihad, later renamed to Vampire: The Masquerade
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# ? May 17, 2021 02:03 |
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Funk these pokemans, where's the lamia? It's like somebody used soften on my digdug, and it was very effective
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# ? May 17, 2021 02:46 |
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# ? Mar 29, 2024 01:59 |
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Pokemon Card collectors - gotta catch 'em all (and rob 'em).
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# ? May 17, 2021 06:09 |