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AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993
These Possums moved in to my precious Trees and I need those Trees





They mock me from the branches of my Trees. Why do they do this?





Please Help Me to rid myself of this Plague Of Tree Possum's. Help. Help. Help.

Oh no. There they go. Again.

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Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
fire would probably work :shrug:

staberind
Feb 20, 2008

but i dont wanna be a spaceship
Fun Shoe

Nooner posted:

fire would probably work :shrug:

Not Empty Quoting but this is my exact immediate thought.
Be careful of giant ealgles, just in case.

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER
if you hit yourself in the head and scream they will leave

Full Metal Jackass
Jan 22, 2001

Rabid bats are welcome in my home
White people are weird

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD
Throw rocks at them while yelling "Hey! Get out of my trees you drat possums!"

SIDS Vicious
Jan 1, 1970


kill then and eat their bodies

staberind
Feb 20, 2008

but i dont wanna be a spaceship
Fun Shoe

Full Metal Jackass posted:

White people are weird

Everybody is weird when your strange.

DeadFatDuckFat
Oct 29, 2012

This avatar brought to you by the 'save our dead gay forums' foundation.


Put them in the trash where they belong they love it

DrPossum
May 15, 2004

i am not a surgeon
did you try asking them? but what do I know

Dial A For Awesome
May 23, 2009
OP - I regret to inform you that, as well as possums, there seems to be a flock of watermarks in your trees as well.

Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD

DrPossum posted:

did you try asking them? but what do I know

*throwing rocks*

Hey! Get out of those guy's trees! You god damned possum!

AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993

Dial A For Awesome posted:

OP - I regret to inform you that, as well as possums, there seems to be a flock of watermarks in your trees as well.

Oh no :ohdear: is that a big problem? I am planning on selling the Leaves of my Trees in Fall and I can't Afford Another Setback Like ThisIJustCanNot

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

A .22 will do it. Or a havahart with a White Claw in it.

Zeluth
May 12, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
*Hiss*

DrPossum
May 15, 2004

i am not a surgeon

Funky See Funky Do posted:

*throwing rocks*

Hey! Get out of those guy's trees! You god damned possum!

:V

Who What Now
Sep 10, 2006

by Azathoth
Those aren't possums those are muskrats.

zaepg
Dec 25, 2008

by sebmojo
They're likely more afraid of you than you are of them.

satanic splash-back
Jan 28, 2009

I think those are oppossums, not possums.

DangerDongs
Nov 7, 2010

Grimey Drawer
You are going to want to keep the first half and domesticate them.

Seth Pecksniff
May 27, 2004

can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.
Offer yourself as a virgin sacrifice

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

sling shot frozen berries at them

Wendigee
Jul 19, 2004

are they stealing your puckins?

phasmid
Jan 16, 2015

Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY
Introduce a law that permits you to sleep with their women.

zaepg
Dec 25, 2008

by sebmojo

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Enjoy every sandwich.

Smellrose

Wendigee posted:

are they stealing your puckins?

puckins don't grow in trees, idiot

although I agree that this is a job for TFR

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:
I'm sure there's a few Kiwi goons who can give you advice.

The advice will be 'Beat them with sticks and sell their skins'.

Meme Poker Party
Sep 1, 2006

by Azathoth
This isn't a DIY project, OP. You need to get a professional!


https://i.imgur.com/K4j5UwD.mp4

Bad Purchase
Jun 17, 2019




there is no tree

The Walrus
Jul 9, 2002

by Fluffdaddy
do u kniow any bears ?

even just a small juvenile black

Loden Taylor
Aug 11, 2003

Sid Vicious posted:

kill then and eat their bodies

you must eat their hearts, then their tree perching powers will be yours

Dumb Sex-Parrot
Dec 25, 2020
Play ambient supermarket muzak near your trees. Gets rid of possums just fine, but maybe attracts raccoons.

blight rhino
Feb 11, 2014

EXQUISITE LURKER RHINO


Nap Ghost
build one of those rock gardens, with like the sand pit they can zenly rake. they'll flock to that.

then you go around and conk them on the head with a Tibetan singing bowl mallet. bing bang boom


guys in image 6-8 are named jakob

whisper their name quietly at night and they'll yoga crawl to you, for orders and directions.


nut posted:

How about you let them be and let nature be nature typical mod behaviour to wanna always change everything for no reason

the poop and pee all over the gorgeous trees. they shall now be allowed

blight rhino fucked around with this message at 04:00 on Jan 20, 2022

nut
Jul 30, 2019

How about you let them be and let nature be nature typical mod behaviour to wanna always change everything for no reason

LuckyCat
Jul 26, 2007

Grimey Drawer
We have to make our possum enclosure really secure because those drat chickens keep breaking in and killing them in the night :argh:

AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993

LuckyCat posted:

We have to make our possum enclosure really secure because those drat chickens keep breaking in and killing them in the night :argh:

Those things are a freaking menace!!!

Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003

Trees are cool

ChunTheUnavoidable
Sep 27, 2021

If you can’t beat em join em

SLICK GOKU BABY
Jun 12, 2001

Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls


You gotta find the Opossums OP.

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AARD VARKMAN
May 17, 1993

ChunTheUnavoidable posted:

If you can’t beat em join em

They bring to hand their dirty detritus to brandish at me, should I dare to stray too closely to their newly held arborous fiefdom. It shames me to say that I can draw no nearer than shouting distance.

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