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Sharparoni
Jan 11, 2004

THE MOST EXCITING MASCOT IN THE LAST 4000 YEARS OF COLLEGE SPORTS


Rampage:

Toni and Ruby defeat Britt and Hayter in a good match. Toni goes over Britt with a rollup. Afterwards, Britt and Hayter have their usual dissension briefly in the ring.

Tony Nese and Mark Sterling cut a pretape promo where The Hottest Free Agent Signing in AEW History Tony Nese says next week in Long Island, his hometown, he wants to fight the undefeated AEW superstar that everybody loves but he and Mark don't know why. Next week, Tony says, "I want Danhausen" as the crowd laughs.

Hook beats JD Drake in about 2-3 minutes. Drake chops Hook who withstands it pretty well, then wants another one, and Hook counters the chop by headbutting Drake's hand as it comes for his chest. Afterwards, Danhausen comes out to a huge response and asks Hook to be in his corner against Nese. Hook looks at the audience and Danhausen pats him on the shoulder to get him to answer. Hook responds by pushing Danhausen to the mat. Danhausen rolls out of the ring sadly, leaving behind a bag of chips as a peace offering. Hook deliberates, picks them up, then drops them and goes to the back.

Riho d. Yuka in a good match. Crowd was kind of quiet for this one after giving them both good pops during their entrances. Crowd got into it toward the end with only the second "this is awesome" chant of the evening (after Fenix v Dante, which was unreal. Not sure if it got shown on screen but after the match Fenix stole Alex's jacket to cover up his face and gave Dante his mask)

ATT comes out with Lambert wearing an Orioles t-shirt. Says he's not one to go for a cheap hometown pop, "but I am from Baltimore." Then he delivers a scorched earth promo against the city, ending it with saying "that's why Dynamite Dan says he's from Miami." It was mostly pretty good ripping on the Orioles but there was an unfortunate reference to "streetwalkers" in there somewhere. Ethan Page then cuts an anti-Sammy Guevara promo, so the crowd went from vehement boos of Lambert to heavy cheers for Page. Frankie Kazarian interrupts, wearing a black suit and silver tie, which is weird looking on him. Kazarian asks Sky if he will keep his word and give him the title shot he asked for. Sky cuts a brief babyface promo about being a fighting champion and bringing prestige back to the TNT title so that it "doesn't get passed around in the back like Tay Conti." Crowd really hates Sammy and Tay at this point. Sky agrees to Frankie's challenge.

The Mark Henry bit features Takeshita cutting a promo that consists entirely of "I respect Jay Lethal. I am not afraid of him." Dutt and Lethal then ramble on about Joe for a little while. Poor Takeshita comes out with the most generic music and no video intro like he did on Dark. Lethal gets a shockingly positive babyface pop and continuous chants throughout the match. I am crestfallen about this. I think the crowd largely didn't know who Takeshita was. By the end of the match they were into him a bit. He had some big moves and very loud strikes and had the match won but Dutt distracted Rick Knox. Takeshita countered the Lethal Injection twice throughout the match but Lethal hit it the third time for the win.

After the match, Dutt and Lethal continue beating up Takeshita. Crowd chants for Joe but Chuck and Trent come out instead. They hit the ring and get immediately dumped. Singh chokes Chuck and repeatedly thrusts him into the mat. Cassidy strolls down to the ring and throws his sunglasses as Singh, who breaks them in one hand and throws them into the crowd. He takes a swipe at OC but OC drops down from the apron to the floor to dodge. Joe's music hits and he tries to come down to the ring but the parade of security guys who Wardlow easily dispatched earlier in the evening hold him back. Joe tries to break through three or four times but nothing really happens. End of show

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ButcherWombat
Sep 28, 2021
Was Max Caster vs Cheesburger as good as Tony Nese vs Cheeseburger?

CombineThresher
Apr 10, 2006

GIT R DONNE

ButcherWombat posted:

Was Max Caster vs Cheesburger as good as Tony Nese vs Cheeseburger?

Yes, because Caster is 1000x more interesting than Tony Nese.

Seams
Feb 3, 2005

ROCK HARD
Caster is good but is he The Premiere Athlete and the Hottest Free Agent Signing in AEW History? No.

KungFu Grip
Jun 18, 2008
Tony Nese is a better wrestler than Caster

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

KungFu Grip posted:

Tony Nese is a better wrestler than Caster

yeah

Gaz-L
Jan 28, 2009

KungFu Grip posted:

Tony Nese is a better wrestler than Caster

A brave statement and I'm glad someone said it

karmicknight
Aug 21, 2011
I disagree given that I have never, nor do I believe will ever, give a poo poo about seeing Tony Nese do anything.

flatluigi
Apr 23, 2008

here come the planes
his last match on rampage was pretty cool and I like his vibes with sterling already

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


karmicknight posted:

I disagree given that I have never, nor do I believe will ever, give a poo poo about seeing Tony Nese do anything.

fawning deference
Jul 4, 2018

Tony Nese insisting that he's the hottest free agent signing in AEW history seems like an "overdoing it" on the cocky heel. No heel is THAT delusional that he's bigger than CM Punk. He should just stick with the "I'm the best athlete on the planet and nobody can keep pace with me in the ring so they have to resort to politicking and cheap babyface poo poo to get over" or something. Every time he says he's the hottest free agent signing in history it feels really forced because everyone knows that's absurd. Best athlete? Debatable but within the bounds of delusional heel without being unrealistic and seeming forced.

flatluigi
Apr 23, 2008

here come the planes
the entire point is that he's being self-effacing past the point of being reasonable

blunt
Jul 7, 2005

Hottest free agent in pro wrestling has never won a match on AEW TV. Smh.

El Generico
Feb 3, 2009

Nobody outrules the Marquise de Cat!
Tony Nese is very bland but inoffensively so. There are way more egregiously bland people on the AEW roster, IMO.

NienNunb
Feb 15, 2012

KungFu Grip posted:

Tony Nese is a better wrestler than Caster

Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008

you're all spoilers all right

MassRafTer
May 26, 2001

BAEST MODE!!!
Tony Nese is a better wrestler and had a very fun match with Cheeseburger but Max Caster vs Cheeseburger sounds better.

Beef Jerky Robot
Sep 20, 2009

"And the DICK?"

Heels should always be reasonable. “Hey, I’m not that great” says Tony Nese

A Real Horse
Oct 26, 2013


Beef Jerky Robot posted:

Heels should always be reasonable. “Hey, I’m not that great” says Tony Nese

How did you know my backyard wrestling gimmick?

Majinfoose
Jul 26, 2007

HOLY SHIT
This vegan brisket is bussin


MassRafTer posted:

Tony Nese is a better wrestler and had a very fun match with Cheeseburger but Max Caster vs Cheeseburger sounds better.

The rap will make it much more entertaining. The dude's name is CHEESEBURGER.

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

Take me to your Shida

Being a wrestler includes charisma and promo ability so I do not agree that Tony Neese is a better wrestler than "Platinum" Max Caster

NienNunb
Feb 15, 2012

Tony Nese is good at putting on good pro wrestling matches, the only thing I really care about when it comes to pro wrestling.

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

tony nese is charismatic, he looks like a character in a wes anderson movie

Cavauro
Jan 9, 2008

you should broaden your horizons. there's a lot more to like in pro wrestling.

History Comes Inside!
Nov 20, 2004




Just make Tony Nese Jay White’s understudy and see how he gets on.

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮
Spoilers for the next two Impacts:

quote:

Thursday, May 12

BTI pre-show match: X-Division Champion Ace Austin defeated Aiden Prince

Kenny King defeated Chris Bey

Knockouts Tag Team Champions The Influence defeated Alisha Edwards & Gisele Shaw

Impact World Champion Josh Alexander & Tomohiro Ishii defeated El Phantasmo & Jay White

Gail Kim announced the first-ever Knockouts Queen of the Mountain match with Knockouts Champion Tasha Steelz, Savannah Evans, Deonna Purrazzo, Taya, Jordynne Grace and Mia Yim.

Eric Young defeated Chris Sabin to win the Gauntlet for the Gold match and will challenge Alexander for the title at Slammiversary.

Thursday, May 19

BTI pre-show match: Crazzy Steve pinned Zicky Dice

"Speedball" Mike Bailey defeated Laredo Kid to earn a spot in an Ultimate X match at Slammiversary.

Mia Yim, Taya Valkyrie and Jordynne Grace defeated Impact Wrestling Knockouts Champion Tasha Steelz, Deonna Purrazzo and Savannah Evans

The Good Brothers defeated Matt Taven & Mike Bennett.

Masha Slamovich pinned Shawna Reed.

Tag Team Champions The Briscoe Brothers defeated Violent by Design to retain

There was an Alexander vs. Young faceoff.

flashy_mcflash
Feb 7, 2011

They didn't do anything with Callihan?

Edward Mass
Sep 14, 2011

𝅘𝅥𝅮 I wanna go home with the armadillo
Good country music from Amarillo and Abilene
Friendliest people and the prettiest women you've ever seen
𝅘𝅥𝅮

flashy_mcflash posted:

They didn't do anything with Callihan?

Impact spoilers rarely mention backstage segments, which I imagine is where the feud is continuing.

Vertical Lime
Dec 11, 2004

yuka tagged with anna jay for elevation

Pylons
Mar 16, 2009

Trish Adora vs. Mercedes for the ROH Women's title was also on Elevation.

Dacap
Jul 8, 2008

I've been involved in a number of cults, both as a leader and a follower.

You have more fun as a follower. But you make more money as a leader.



Pylons posted:

Trish Adora vs. Mercedes for the ROH Women's title was also on Elevation.

Nice

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


Kris Statlander is in the Owen tournament, replacing Shida, per Schiavone at the Rampage taping

Pylons
Mar 16, 2009

At first I was a bit iffy about this but.. I think it accomplishes a couple good things:

Setup Statlander vs. Jade at DoN

Further Deeb's heel turn

Start building the foundation for a Shida/Statlander tag team.

Stall_19
Jan 2, 2013

Prodigy of Victor von Doom
And why is Shida being replaced?

xbilkis
Apr 11, 2005

god qb
me
jay hova
Stat breaking in her new gimmick in a tournament she's presumably not gonna win is suboptimal, but yeah given that she's facing Red Velvet you could spin it into a Jade match real easy. Maybe have Statlander win the quarterfinals match, then the Baddies cost her in the semis, go from there

Stall_19 posted:

And why is Shida being replaced?

She's been working in Japan so maybe something to do with that

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


Stall_19 posted:

And why is Shida being replaced?

Storyline injury; in reality she's in Japan right now and booked for a bit

Stall_19
Jan 2, 2013

Prodigy of Victor von Doom

Chris James 2 posted:

Storyline injury; in reality she's in Japan right now and booked for a bit

Mega awkward to do a storyline injury when following her twitter you see this post

https://twitter.com/shidahikaru/status/1524581934361235456

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

Take me to your Shida

Pylons posted:

Start building the foundation for a Shida/Statlander tag team.

The foundation is already there they tagged a fair amount in the pandemic era, it's what spawned the animation that became my avatar (and the text is what I kept calling them as a tag team)

abraham linksys
Sep 6, 2010

:darksouls:

Stall_19 posted:

Mega awkward to do a storyline injury when following her twitter you see this post

yeah this is dumb as gently caress

various possibilities i guess

* tk just thought a storyline injury angle would help put deeb over and booked this all on purpose, which is, again, dumb when anyone with an internet connection who pays any attention to aew's womens division knows shida is in japan

* tk forgot about shida's japan booking and added her to the tournament and quickly scrambled to do this replacement once he realized he hosed up

* the tournament start kept getting delayed to try to line up with various things (the finals on ppv, making sure joe had debuted, maybe noncompetes for these jokers coming up) and shida was supposed to have a match but they just didn't get it on the card in time before she went to japan (which would also explain why she had a feud with deeb that lasted, in my estimation, about eight thousand years)

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Pylons
Mar 16, 2009

abraham linksys posted:

yeah this is dumb as gently caress

various possibilities i guess

* tk just thought a storyline injury angle would help put deeb over and booked this all on purpose, which is, again, dumb when anyone with an internet connection who pays any attention to aew's womens division knows shida is in japan

* tk forgot about shida's japan booking and added her to the tournament and quickly scrambled to do this replacement once he realized he hosed up

* the tournament start kept getting delayed to try to line up with various things (the finals on ppv, making sure joe had debuted, maybe noncompetes for these jokers coming up) and shida was supposed to have a match but they just didn't get it on the card in time before she went to japan (which would also explain why she had a feud with deeb that lasted, in my estimation, about eight thousand years)

I also think it's possible Tony asked her to work TJPW since he was pulling Yuka on short notice and she's just staying in Japan for a bit.

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