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tag urself
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# ? May 18, 2022 12:59 |
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# ? Mar 29, 2024 07:45 |
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I'm the dumb ugly cracker
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# ? May 18, 2022 13:13 |
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fart
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# ? May 18, 2022 13:26 |
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I saw some Galagher the other day and he smashed a cake with his hammer and it splashed into the crowd and one of the people in the audience ate some.
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# ? May 18, 2022 13:44 |
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what does this guy even do besides hitting things with a hammer? Does he have a normal standup or something?
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# ? May 18, 2022 14:06 |
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Caesar Saladin posted:what does this guy even do besides hitting things with a hammer? Does he have a normal standup or something? Racist humor mostly, based entirely on the fact that my boomer inlaws love him.
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# ? May 18, 2022 14:24 |
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Caesar Saladin posted:what does this guy even do besides hitting things with a hammer? Does he have a normal standup or something? I watched a few of his stand-up acts way back when (I think it used to be on really late on Comedy Central, along with other old stuff) and it's almost entirely really tepid observational humor. "Isn't it weird how..." kind of stuff. He had this long bit about how English sometimes has really weird spelling rules. Then, for a finale, he'll smash a watermelon and maybe a few other things and the crowd will go wild. It's not great, but there are worse things (though most of those worse things involve Jeff Dunham and his loving puppets).
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# ? May 18, 2022 14:55 |
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I would pay $5000 for Gallagher to wallop my balls with a hammer after doing a stand up routine about them and how pathetic they are to an audience
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# ? May 18, 2022 15:03 |
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I saw a Gallagher show back in the mid 90's. It was fine. My brother even got up on stage and helped out with a bit.
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# ? May 18, 2022 15:04 |
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How's his balls? Your brothers I mean. After Gallagher hit them full on with a sledgehammer to the screaming delight of others. How's his sack is what I'm asking.
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# ? May 18, 2022 15:07 |
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I'm the guy laughing hysterically at smashed fruit
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# ? May 18, 2022 15:09 |
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Big Beef City posted:How's his balls? He's on this dead gay forum so you can ask him if you want. I can't remember the setup, but the end result of the bit is that my brother dumped a can of pumpkin pie filling on the audience.
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# ? May 18, 2022 15:09 |
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Gallagher? drat near killed ‘er!
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# ? May 18, 2022 15:09 |
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i'm the hot chick
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# ? May 18, 2022 15:25 |
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kntfkr posted:i'm the hot chick i'm also just out of frame, totally existing with qualities and attributes you can believe
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# ? May 18, 2022 15:45 |
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Colonel Cancer posted:I'm the dumb ugly cracker I'm the other one
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# ? May 18, 2022 16:09 |
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I'm the person that's smiling, happy and enjoying my evening out.
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# ? May 18, 2022 16:15 |
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Counterpoint: Make friends with the abyss and you'll never have to pay for another Gallagher ticket again.
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:19 |
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Caesar Saladin posted:what does this guy even do besides hitting things with a hammer? Does he have a normal standup or something? Now, you've gone and articulated a question that I never even considered. I feel like this guy's been around all my life, and he was the guy that smashed food with a big hammer. That's all I ever needed to know. Only now, that you openly voice this query, do I dare consider the possibility that there is more to the story, more to the man.
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:20 |
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AcidCat posted:consider the possibility that there is more to the story, more to the man. That Gallagher is really a 5th dimensional shadow cast by super-intelligent exploding watermelons?
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:22 |
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Caesar Saladin posted:what does this guy even do besides hitting things with a hammer? Does he have a normal standup or something? He tells it like it is.
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:33 |
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I figured he was like 90 by now but apparently he’s only 75
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:34 |
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why do they call it a hot water heater if you don't need to heat hot water?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:36 |
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lol that his brother went behind his back and toured as him and nobody could tell the difference because Gallagher sux
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:37 |
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I'm the guy who paid $150 for front row Gallagher tickets in 1983 and was also at the US Capitol on January 6th, 2021.
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:41 |
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iirc he does silly props and dad jokes/observations
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:43 |
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# ? May 18, 2022 17:49 |
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You EVER wear a SHIRT so TIGHT you can see your NIPPLES through YOUR SUSPENDERS because BROTHER, I HAVE *hits a watermelon, sexually*
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# ? May 18, 2022 18:02 |
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# ? May 19, 2022 18:46 |
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Posting in a Precision thread
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# ? May 19, 2022 18:47 |
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What if you went on stage with Gallagher and started loving the watermelon right there in front of the audience and Gallagher brought the hammer down and SMASH just chunks of your hog and watermelon all mixed up forever
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# ? May 19, 2022 18:53 |
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Gallagher was either before my time or just someone I had zero awareness of forever. At the time Chapelle did the "black Gallagher" skit on his show I had never seen the real Gallagher and had no mental image of him. So whenever he gets mentioned it takes me a moment to remember that Black Gallagher was a gag and the real one is white.
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# ? May 19, 2022 19:01 |
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Gallagher was so popular his twin brother just stole his entire set. Then Gallagher sued and Gallagher had to be called Gallagher 2. Then Gallagher went unhinged and started screaming about Mexicans and the Chinese between watermelon smashes
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# ? May 19, 2022 19:16 |
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Caesar Saladin posted:what does this guy even do besides hitting things with a hammer? Does he have a normal standup or something? His specials were on Showtime nonstop, when I was a kid. I think it could best be described as "hick George Carlin". Like, most of his stuff is lifted wholesale from the type of stuff Carlin would talk about, but dumbed down for a Gallagher crowd, mixed with prop comedy for illustrative purposes. And then after 40 minutes of that it's "gently caress it, you came to watch me smash poo poo with the Sledge-o-matic."
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# ? May 19, 2022 19:26 |
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4ltZRK7BvQ
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# ? May 19, 2022 21:01 |
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Fuckagher
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# ? May 19, 2022 21:03 |
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the crowd is just so loving hot i can't stand it
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# ? May 19, 2022 21:03 |
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Cause after all, you're my watermelon.
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# ? May 19, 2022 21:06 |
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I'M A TRAVELING COMEDIAN I KNOW HOW UPS WORKS
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# ? May 19, 2022 21:07 |
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# ? Mar 29, 2024 07:45 |
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galagher and the hydraulic press channel show us that "smash thing with thing" is a universal human interest
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# ? May 19, 2022 21:09 |