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Irregardless
Jan 19, 2007

not even once.
Why would someone buy a bidet if they already own a waterpik? Oh yeah they’re cowards what else have you guys learned recently

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AKZ
Nov 5, 2009

Doing detail work, huh?

Buce
Dec 23, 2005

Bidet is hands-free, you shmuck.

Black88GTA
Oct 8, 2009
Also, why would someone buy a waterpik if they already own a bidet? Just lean over that poo poo #lifehack

Irregardless
Jan 19, 2007

not even once.
Armadillos are just a possum on the half shell

Zeluth
May 12, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Your own toilet creates aerosol feces through flushing. Isn't that enough?

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010
Why would you buy a bidet OR a waterpik if you already have a penis?

ninjoatse.cx
Apr 9, 2005

Fun Shoe

Buce posted:

Bidet is hands-free, you shmuck.

!

You just saved me some money on a waterpik!

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Just poo poo in the tub and shower off, idiots

Chef Boyardeez Nuts
Sep 9, 2011

The more you kick against the pricks, the more you suffer.
That you can use the space bar on your phone to scroll left and right

Panic! At The Tesco
Aug 19, 2005

FART


i use a powerwasher

theres no skin left on my rear end in a top hat at all tbh it's a pretty gory sight but boy is it clean

Irregardless
Jan 19, 2007

not even once.
You can turn off the feature in your car that shakes the wheel

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

If you can afford to buy a bidet, you can easily afford to replace your stationary shower head with a wand. Real bad shits probably merit showering anyway, especially if they're loaded with hole burning hot sauce.

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

Buce posted:

Bidet is hands-free, you shmuck.

Only if you want it to be

for fucks sake
Jan 23, 2016

Devils Affricate posted:

Why would you buy a bidet OR a waterpik if you already have a penis?

Wait are you saying i can piss the poo poo off my rear end?

Collateral
Feb 17, 2010

Colonel Cancer posted:

Just poo poo in the tub and shower off, idiots

Yeah man, you can squidge it down the plughole with your foot and have it push up inbetween your toes, all warm like.

CaptainSarcastic
Jul 6, 2013



Collateral posted:

Yeah man, you can squidge it down the plughole with your foot and have it push up inbetween your toes, all warm like.

How could you not refer to it as "wafflestomp." Really, what's wrong with you?

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

A Soft Nylon Bag

for fucks sake posted:

Wait are you saying i can piss the poo poo off my rear end?

Eh, it’s trickier than it sounds. The pro move is to have someone else piss the poo poo off of your rear end.

Turrurrurrurrrrrrr
Dec 22, 2018

I hope this is "battle" enough for you, friend.

Panic! At The Tesco posted:

i use a powerwasher

theres no skin left on my rear end in a top hat at all tbh it's a pretty gory sight but boy is it clean

This, but also for gums and teeth.

SCheeseman
Apr 23, 2003

do you realize that everyone you know someday will die?

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

SCheeseman posted:

do you realize that everyone you know someday will die?

I presume some will outlive me

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010

for fucks sake posted:

Wait are you saying i can piss the poo poo off my rear end?

*smirks, puts hands in trench coat pockets, turns and walks away into the evening fog*

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

That guy in the trench coat is just three smaller rear end pissers stacked on top of each other!

Icochet
Mar 18, 2008

I have a very small TV. Don't make fun of it! Please don't shame it like that~

Grimey Drawer
The spelling of mass murder is eerily similar to that of rear end murder

phobo
Aug 7, 2008
My butt hole is so clean you could eat off of it! On an unrelated note, anyone want to come over to my place and eat some lunch?

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002

SCheeseman posted:

do you realize that everyone you know someday will die?

can i be next

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

SCheeseman posted:

do you realize that everyone you know someday will die?

I realize that life goes fast. It’s hard to make the good things last!

you realize the sun doesn’t go down? It’s just an illusion caused by the world spinning ‘round

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
And did you know that when you really get close
Nothing really touches, bro, just kind of floats?
So when you think it might just come to blows
Just so you know, it won't, because it can't, bro

Zeluth
May 12, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fixing a hole.

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ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

same but enemas

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