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Irregardless
Jan 19, 2007

not even once.
Would you rather

Poop tons of little poops every time such that every fart is likely to be a shart

Or

When you coom instead of lots of tiny sperms you coom one big sperm the size of a lg. (large) tadpole (before front legs but after back legs)

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Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

Can I do both?

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981

No id rather not

Irregardless
Jan 19, 2007

not even once.

Big Beef City posted:

Can I do both?

I believe in you

Zealander
Aug 3, 2006
apples and oranges

Benny Harvey
Nov 24, 2012

Coom.

Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
Probably the werid cum thing, could prob make a lot of money off of like furries or some other equally degenerate group of sex weirds if you filmed it

Vampire Panties
Apr 18, 2001
nposter
Nap Ghost
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUhjlb96mA8

the holy poopacy
May 16, 2009

hey! check this out
Fun Shoe
why not both, it's not like my life can actually get any worse than reading this thread

akma
Jan 30, 2016

I simply lack the motivation to write anything here.
Yes.

Chief McHeath
Apr 23, 2002

Perhaps.

Blue Footed Booby
Oct 4, 2006

got those happy feet

the holy poopacy posted:

why not both, it's not like my life can actually get any worse than reading this thread

Would you rather read this thread for five minutes a day for the rest of your life, or stick a glass laboratory stir stick in your pee hole then bend your cock like you're activating a glow stick?

Turrurrurrurrrrrrr
Dec 22, 2018

I hope this is "battle" enough for you, friend.

Flinging dung and shooting big sperm? Sounds like you're describing a hippopotamus!

i must compose
Jul 4, 2010

Until the lions have their own historians, the history of the hunt will always glorify the hunter.
What would the resulting baby look like from the sperm

Kirk Vikernes
Apr 26, 2004

Count Goatnackh

I'll take XL cummies any day.

BigBadSteve
Apr 29, 2009

Blue Footed Booby posted:

Would you rather read this thread for five minutes a day for the rest of your life, or stick a glass laboratory stir stick in your pee hole then bend your cock like you're activating a glow stick?

Nice propaganda for the thread!

Quantum of Phallus
Dec 27, 2010

no poll, gas thread

Elentor
Dec 14, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Ever since I saw Pete Holmes doing a bit as Batman saying it, I started using irregardless a lot, some people (two) get very mad at it.

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer
I will choose the first option OP

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer
I'm not sure how a big sperm works but it sounds traumatic

That Dang Lizard
Jul 13, 2016

what; an idiomt

Irregardless posted:

When you coom instead of lots of tiny sperms you coom one big sperm the size of a lg. (large) tadpole

Only if it makes the stereotypical blowgun FWOOMP noise you hear on cartoons as it comes out.

syntaxfunction
Oct 27, 2010

Elentor posted:

Ever since I saw Pete Holmes doing a bit as Batman saying it, I started using irregardless a lot, some people (two) get very mad at it.

I think irregardless is a funny word, but I mention what it means vs regardless to people because those people in turn find it far more important than they really should (which is at all). Everyone knows what you mean by irregardless, it doesn't matter. But then people freak out when they catch themselves using it despite no one else caring lol

Alucard
Mar 11, 2002
Pillbug

Irregardless posted:

Would you rather

Poop tons of little poops every time such that every fart is likely to be a shart

Or

When you coom instead of lots of tiny sperms you coom one big sperm the size of a lg. (large) tadpole (before front legs but after back legs)

How is this different from any other day?

for fucks sake
Jan 23, 2016

What about pooping tadpoles?

Irregardless
Jan 19, 2007

not even once.

That Dang Lizard posted:

Only if it makes the stereotypical blowgun FWOOMP noise you hear on cartoons as it comes out.

Tbh in my mind I imagined it sounding like a smallish bubble wrap style packing material popping, but wetter.

But also just realized that if it came out fast enough to make a popping noise, it’d be a sonic coom.

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

syntaxfunction posted:

I think irregardless is a funny word, but I mention what it means vs regardless to people because those people in turn find it far more important than they really should (which is at all). Everyone knows what you mean by irregardless, it doesn't matter. But then people freak out when they catch themselves using it despite no one else caring lol

I absolutely promise you that people are sincerely way more annoyed and put off by you talking to them about this than catching themselves saying it in the future. You're just forever 'that guy that talks about words and poo poo' to them.

Hammerite
Mar 9, 2007

And you don't remember what I said here, either, but it was pompous and stupid.
Jade Ear Joe
can i keep the sperm tadpole as a pet in a little spermarium

Irregardless
Jan 19, 2007

not even once.

Hammerite posted:

can i keep the sperm tadpole as a pet in a little spermarium

You are in fact liable for its wellbeing

syntaxfunction
Oct 27, 2010

Big Beef City posted:

I absolutely promise you that people are sincerely way more annoyed and put off by you talking to them about this than catching themselves saying it in the future. You're just forever 'that guy that talks about words and poo poo' to them.

Actually nah. I only mention it to friends to start. I offhand mentioned it to a housemate once a year ago and haven't mentioned it since and she's made it a big thing whenever she says it. I just thought it was interesting, same as overwhelm meaning the same as whelm.

Sometimes I just like little facts ya know? Not everything is a huge mystery. I also wouldn't be opposed to being the girl that talks about words and poo poo tho :kimchi:

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

syntaxfunction posted:

Actually nah. I only mention it to friends to start. I offhand mentioned it to a housemate once a year ago and haven't mentioned it since and she's made it a big thing whenever she says it. I just thought it was interesting, same as overwhelm meaning the same as whelm.

Sometimes I just like little facts ya know? Not everything is a huge mystery. I also wouldn't be opposed to being the girl that talks about words and poo poo tho :kimchi:

irregardless of all that how would you feel about a giant sperm that comes out screaming and terrified in addition to how it's already been described because I have some fun new news to share

syntaxfunction
Oct 27, 2010

Big Beef City posted:

irregardless of all that how would you feel about a giant sperm that comes out screaming and terrified in addition to how it's already been described because I have some fun new news to share

A terrified sperm is a patriotic sperm.

BAGS FLY AT NOON
Apr 6, 2011

I feel like the natural response to a giant sperm flopping around would be to beat it to death with whatever happens to be close at hand.

old beast lunatic
Nov 3, 2004

by Hand Knit

BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:

I feel like the natural response to a giant sperm flopping around would be to beat it to death with whatever happens to be close at hand.

So abortion is now a sport? cool

marshmallow creep
Dec 10, 2008

I've been sitting here for 5 mins trying to think of a joke to make but I just realised the animators of Mass Effect already did it for me

The tadpole would probably feel like giving birth down your penis so I pick that for every man on earth so they can experience the miracle.

Big Beef City
Aug 15, 2013

old beast lunatic posted:

So abortion is now a sport? cool

always has been

Lucky Guy
Jan 24, 2013

TY for no bm

Nooner posted:

Probably the werid cum thing, could prob make a lot of money off of like furries or some other equally degenerate group of sex weirds if you filmed it

I like this entrepreneurial spirit

William Henry Hairytaint
Oct 29, 2011



I appreciate your scenario OP but I think I'll probably just keep pooping and cumming like I normally do

I hate change

Irregardless
Jan 19, 2007

not even once.
Okay new one

Would you rather

Always have something sticky stuck to the bottom of your socks

Or

Always have to use the bathroom at every public place you go

DandyLion
Jun 24, 2010
disrespectul Deciever

Irregardless posted:

Okay new one

Would you rather

Always have something sticky stuck to the bottom of your socks

Or

Always have to use the bathroom at every public place you go

gently caress the sock, Marry the sticky goop on the bottom, kill the public bathroom

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Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
What if every time you poop a tiny poop version of you comes out (easily recognizable by anyone as you) and starts causing havoc in the general premises

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