buttcoin: my kids know me as this ape

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > buttcoin: my kids know me as this ape

«‹›1484 »

Pigbuster: Sep 12, 2010; Fun Shoe

LanceHunter posted:

Craig Wright is clearly not Satoshi, but given who the first few people were who got involved with Bitcoin, it definitely wasn't Dorian Nakamoto either. He wasn't a participant in any of the futurist or cryptography groups where bitcoin was first announced, and had no overlap with any of the initial bitcoin developers. That Newsweek article was complete journalist malpractice, and relied on the reporter explaining what he was doing so poorly that Nakamoto legitimately thought he was just being used as an expert to explain what a blockchain was.

The most likely candidate for the real Satoshi is Hal Finney. He was there in the beginning, the first publicity for bitcoin happened in mailing lists and forums where he was already a member, and he was literally working on anonymous digital currency projects since the early 2000s. Plus, he died before bitcoin really took off and it would even be feasible to have an enormous cash-out.

Counterpoint: Dorian Nakamoto is Satoshi because that photo of him is very good

# ? Jun 9, 2022 18:54

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 12, 2024 05:41

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

Mercury_Storm posted:

ah, I didn't know that his family actually confirmed it was him.

also Democratic senators say: buy!! the dip!

https://twitter.com/means_tv/status/1534894872271929344

i love the part in the clip where she starts excitedly talking about bitcoin and right then they chose to show all the negative percentages of how bad all the coins are doing

just :kiss:

editing guys

# ? Jun 9, 2022 18:55

gschmidl: Sep 3, 2011; watch with knife hands

Boxturret posted:

can we say that craig writght is satoshi and punish him for all of bitcoin's crimes?

This but Elon Musk

# ? Jun 9, 2022 19:02

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

gschmidl posted:

This but Elon Musk

maybe both, one could be satoshi and the other nakamoto

# ? Jun 9, 2022 19:06

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; bone shaking.
soul baking.

LanceHunter posted:

Craig Wright is clearly not Satoshi, but given who the first few people were who got involved with Bitcoin, it definitely wasn't Dorian Nakamoto either. He wasn't a participant in any of the futurist or cryptography groups where bitcoin was first announced, and had no overlap with any of the initial bitcoin developers. That Newsweek article was complete journalist malpractice, and relied on the reporter explaining what he was doing so poorly that Nakamoto legitimately thought he was just being used as an expert to explain what a blockchain was.

The most likely candidate for the real Satoshi is Hal Finney. He was there in the beginning, the first publicity for bitcoin happened in mailing lists and forums where he was already a member, and he was literally working on anonymous digital currency projects since the early 2000s. Plus, he died before bitcoin really took off and it would even be feasible to have an enormous cash-out.

if any of those people were satoshi, they wouldn't be able to keep their mouths shut.

bitcoin wasn't made because of some futurist ideals or love of cryptography - it just used cryptography for its goal of facilitating the delivery of top quality uk model trains to california. satoshi just showed those guys his ideas because they seemed like a receptive group. the moment they started using it for criminal things and the feds started talking to people, he nuked everything.

# ? Jun 9, 2022 19:07

evilweasel: Aug 24, 2002

Mr. Nice! posted:

if any of those people were satoshi, they wouldn't be able to keep their mouths shut.

bitcoin wasn't made because of some futurist ideals or love of cryptography - it just used cryptography for its goal of facilitating the delivery of top quality uk model trains to california. satoshi just showed those guys his ideas because they seemed like a receptive group. the moment they started using it for criminal things and the feds started talking to people, he nuked everything.

hal finney has absolutely no problem keeping his mouth shut since 2014, about anything at all

well it might be open and he can't close it, but either way, no statements about bitcoin or anything else are passing out of it

# ? Jun 9, 2022 19:14

LanceHunter: Nov 12, 2016; Beautiful People Club

Also, "facilitating the delivery of top quality uk model trains to california" seems like an odd use-case when that wouldn't have even been possible with bitcoin for many years after it was introduced.

And really, the biggest hole in the Dorian Nakamoto-as-Satoshi story is that he is still alive but in the custody of his family. That means his family has control and access to all of his personal items. If there was actually a chance that billions of dollars was possibly sitting on a hard drive and all you had to do to be wealthier than your wildest dreams was get your bed-ridden grandpa to tell you the code, they would have found a way to do it.

# ? Jun 9, 2022 19:26

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

satoshi nakamoto is actually a type of small hat

# ? Jun 9, 2022 19:28

Pigbuster: Sep 12, 2010; Fun Shoe

LanceHunter posted:

Also, "facilitating the delivery of top quality uk model trains to california" seems like an odd use-case when that wouldn't have even been possible with bitcoin for many years after it was introduced.

And really, the biggest hole in the Dorian Nakamoto-as-Satoshi story is that he is still alive but in the custody of his family. That means his family has control and access to all of his personal items. If there was actually a chance that billions of dollars was possibly sitting on a hard drive and all you had to do to be wealthier than your wildest dreams was get your bed-ridden grandpa to tell you the code, they would have found a way to do it.

Did he ever actually get his trains

# ? Jun 9, 2022 19:32

more falafel please: Feb 26, 2005; forums poster

Pigbuster posted:

Did he ever actually get his trains

N-scale
Faux
Trains

# ? Jun 9, 2022 19:46

qirex: Feb 15, 2001

seth green paid 300 grand to get his ape back

https://twitter.com/sarahnemerson/status/1534964674457837568?s=21&t=uzqfpuonFFTKTIIVu4HtLg

# ? Jun 9, 2022 20:29

Pigbuster: Sep 12, 2010; Fun Shoe

Imagine if someone else manages to steal it again

# ? Jun 9, 2022 20:32

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

did john cheese steal it

# ? Jun 9, 2022 20:33

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; bone shaking.
soul baking.

LanceHunter posted:

Also, "facilitating the delivery of top quality uk model trains to california" seems like an odd use-case when that wouldn't have even been possible with bitcoin for many years after it was introduced.

And really, the biggest hole in the Dorian Nakamoto-as-Satoshi story is that he is still alive but in the custody of his family. That means his family has control and access to all of his personal items. If there was actually a chance that billions of dollars was possibly sitting on a hard drive and all you had to do to be wealthier than your wildest dreams was get your bed-ridden grandpa to tell you the code, they would have found a way to do it.

there�s no amount of anything that can recover those private keys. its not just as simple as not knowing a password. they were deleted. he flattened everything bitcoin related when the feds came in. even if he hadn�t had a stroke, there is no way for him to actually recover those private keys.

and the use case was why he came up with the whitepaper. the fact that it didn�t happen right away wasn�t the point. it was a nifty idea to him, he shared with people he thought might agree, and got spooked when the feds showed up.

# ? Jun 9, 2022 20:41

Zopotantor: Feb 24, 2013; ...und ist er drin dann lassen wir ihn niemals wieder raus...

text editor posted:

Not an expiration date, a lockout date - in order to spend the money for dates before January 3rd, 2029, you need the key on the bill + a key from the vendor's servers. If they shut down the service in 2024 when it fizzles out or the server gets wiped and the keys get lost, then you would have to wait until 2029 to be able to spend the funds on the bill.

how does the bill know what date it is?

# ? Jun 9, 2022 20:49

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

qirex posted:

Green got his ape back from Mr. Cheese, according to transaction records and Green confirming this to me just now when I crashed his NFT project's Twitter Space.

It also appears Green may have paid Cheese nearly $300,000 to return the ape!!!!

I don't like this cluedo reboot

# ? Jun 9, 2022 20:56

Paladinus: Jan 11, 2014; heyHEYYYY!!!

Shame Boy posted:

did john cheese steal it

No, it was Richard Cheese.

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:05

LanceHunter: Nov 12, 2016; Beautiful People Club

Mr. Nice! posted:

there�s no amount of anything that can recover those private keys. its not just as simple as not knowing a password. they were deleted. he flattened everything bitcoin related when the feds came in. even if he hadn�t had a stroke, there is no way for him to actually recover those private keys.

and the use case was why he came up with the whitepaper. the fact that it didn�t happen right away wasn�t the point. it was a nifty idea to him, he shared with people he thought might agree, and got spooked when the feds showed up.

You're speaking as though this actually happened and isn't just your wild speculation. Also, it is very clear from the writings left behind that Satoshi Nakamoto was a goldbug-libertarian type, not somebody complaining about international exchange rates. For your version of events to work, this guy would have had to go from having zero contact with any crypto groups to suddenly being deeply immeshed in their culture and interests in the period of about a week; have good enough SecOps to be able to completely wipe and flatten all evidence and ability to access the original Satoshi Nakamoto work while simultaneously being so bad at SecOps that he used his birth name as his alias.

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:14

blugu64: Jul 17, 2006; Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?

has anyone gotten a photo shoot with Dorians train set? I�d like to see Dorians train set.

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:17

SubG: Aug 19, 2004; It's a hard world for little things.

Mr. Nice! posted:

if any of those people were satoshi, they wouldn't be able to keep their mouths shut.

hal finney is currently incapable of speaking about bitcoin because he, or rather his disembodied head, is currently undergoing "applied hypothermia" in an alcor "life extension" facility

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:18

SubG: Aug 19, 2004; It's a hard world for little things.

because of course it loving is

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:20

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

weird how you can dress up your human dissection fetish as some sort of futurist thing and people will pay you to dismember them and do weird things to their component pieces

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:24

blugu64: Jul 17, 2006; Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?

here�s the only train I can find online.

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:25

Boxturret: Oct 3, 2013; Don't ask me about Sonic the Hedgehog diaper fetish

"Wait you're saying if I just wore a lab coat people would have paid me to stick them in the fridge??" -serial killer known for stuffing people in a fridge

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:26

Crust First: May 1, 2013; Wrong lads.

the dorian saga was my favorite season of bitcoin. for silly reasons i won't go into, the wall street journal thought an email i created belonged to dorian and tried inviting him to lunch:

WSJ posted:

Good morning Mr. Nakamoto,

I know yesterday was a crazy day for you. Maybe we can help put this whole thing to bed. Unfortunately, there are still many questions to be asked after your AP interview yesterday. We�d love to give you the vehicle to answer them. We have an unparalleled team of experienced reporters and editors who will give the fairest and most balanced treatment of your story possible.

So, feel free to reach out to me at the number below. Alternatively, you can reach out to either of my colleagues in Los Angeles, [name redacted] and [name redacted], (email addresses attached) who can meet you in person (and, of course, buy you a lunch, dinner, drinks, whatever you need to get yourself comfortable.)

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:32

SubG: Aug 19, 2004; It's a hard world for little things.

blugu64 posted:

has anyone gotten a photo shoot with Dorians train set? I�d like to see Dorians train set.

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:43

Paladinus: Jan 11, 2014; heyHEYYYY!!!

He got his lunch in the end, bless him.

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:48

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

SubG posted:

hal finney is currently incapable of speaking about bitcoin because he, or rather his disembodied head, is currently undergoing "applied hypothermia" in an alcor "life extension" facility

i mean that's one way to ensure someone spends the time and effort to resurrect you in the future

or just dissects your brain to find your bitcoins

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:48

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

Crust First posted:

the dorian saga was my favorite season of bitcoin. for silly reasons i won't go into, the wall street journal thought an email i created belonged to dorian and tried inviting him to lunch:

they know the way to the man's heart, i'll give them that

# ? Jun 9, 2022 21:49