|
they watch thinking its gonna be an epic own but it just gets them punished even harder. I remember getting shoved around and shouting "WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION" because I was like 9 and had somehow managed to watch Full Metal Jacket from behind the bannister when I was meant to be in bed. Clearly I was nowhere near as intimidating as R. Lee Ermey as Gunnery Sergeant Hartman and just got shoved around even harder. Probably earlier in life I recited the "I'm giving you to the count of ten.." speech from Home Alone to a bully and got sent to the principals office and asked about the whole "pump your guys full of led" bit and where I had heard it. I explained "HOME ALONE THANKS" or whatever and that I had seen it at "GRANDMAS", and never heard much else about it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tlwda9S58Lg - Basically I relate super hard to the "god and anime" kid. Suburban jabroni twinks like myself had it in our heads that we could give an epic speech that would pwn our enemies so hard they would ultimately concede, seeing the error of their ways. In reality, we were just way more hilarious, weirder, an easy to bully. anyways thanks for listenign thats what this thread is about
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 12:35
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 24, 2024 03:51 |
|
|
sorry that happened to you
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 13:11
|
|
|
Kids who yell like Goku charging up their power level
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 13:43
|
|
|
i must compose posted:Kids who yell like Goku charging up their power level MY POWER LEVEL IS OVER 5000! As I'm getting whipped with a towerl by a 9th grader with back hair.
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 13:57
|
|
|
This isn’t even my final form
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 14:15
|
|
|
"Fly, you fools!" A Balrog appears!
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 14:17
|
|
|
I called a kid "penis breath" when he picked on me on the bus. The joke was on me, though, I ended up getting called in to the principal's office the next day and had to apologize for saying it.
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 15:03
|
|
|
Life, uh, finds a way. I CHOOSE YOU, GO PIKACHU!
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 15:10
|
|
|
Yippee motherfucker
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 16:33
|
|
|
"Sock it to me!" "Danger, Will Robinson!" "Oh my god, they killed Kenny!" ""Am I bovvered? Do I look bovvered?" "Book 'em, Danno!" More here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_catchphrases_in_American_and_British_mass_media
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 17:28
|
|
|
BAGS FLY AT NOON posted:This isn’t even my final form Final form turns out to be the fetal position with a full load in underpants.
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 17:35
|
|
|
Khan
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 17:35
|
|
|
What are ya gonna do, stab me? 
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 18:05
|
|
|
BigBadSteve posted:"Sock it to me!" I randomly scrolled down and got "welcome to the o.c., bitch" which actually fits
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 18:56
|
|
|
*Farts and shits self* looks like we've got company
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 19:05
|
|
|
*wipes mud off face, breathes heavily, enters a fighting stance* Who is John Galt? This is J
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 19:09
|
|
|
"rose... bud..... uurrk"
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 19:10
|
|
|
Poohs Packin posted:
The only mistake you made was not finishing the quote with NUMB-NUTS. That would have dropped your opponent. In 9th grade gym class I watched two kids square off to fight in the locker room. The one kid got into a karate stance, started circling his hands around and hissing hooowaaaaah then everyone started laughing and the other kid slammed him into the wall. Bluffing you know karate will get your rear end kicked worse.
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 19:28
|
|
|
People keep asking if I'm back. Yeah, I'm thinkin I'm back
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 19:33
|
|
|
what about if you just turn your hat around backwards. bend over to get into a fighting stance but your pants rip and you have an asthma attack.
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 20:24
|
|
|
You'd be embarrassed and shamed for the rest of your life probably.
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 20:30
|
|
|
Not really the same thing but I got called into the office for making a Bob Dole joke on like some Microsoft powerpoint holiday postcard we were supposed to make in Computer Literacy class and they just sat there grilling me saying "We know what you were referencing" which was totally blowing my mind because I just said Bob Dole on the thing because there was like a Family Guy or Simpsons joke about it that I repeated without comprehension. Afterwards I looked it up and I think they were trying to admit I had put it on there because of the Viagra ad. poo poo was so pathetic lol, why the hell even have like an intervention over that
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 20:31
|
|
|
Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:Not really the same thing but I got called into the office for making a Bob Dole joke on like some Microsoft powerpoint holiday postcard we were supposed to make in Computer Literacy class and they just sat there grilling me saying "We know what you were referencing" which was totally blowing my mind because I just said Bob Dole on the thing because there was like a Family Guy or Simpsons joke about it that I repeated without comprehension. so did you end up getting any viagra?
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 20:31
|
|
|
ManBoyChef posted:so did you end up getting any viagra? No, I made some joke on a power point presentation later where I put clipart of an ambulance and then clipart of santa flying over it with "he sees you when you're sleeping, so hide for goodness sake" and got called in for that too
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 20:33
|
|
|
IM ABOUT TO poo poo MY PANTS!!!!
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 20:54
|
|
|
My Dad owns a dealership
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 20:55
|
|
|
The final solution? Arm all children
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 20:57
|
|
|
what if you pull one of these numbers... You just inflate your air sac to try to scare away your attackers. Then you better watch out.... for the ladies!
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 21:07
|
|
|
"Did I do that~~??" I proclaim as I piss my pants
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 21:13
|
|
|
Don't show off your bright colors there might be a predator around! 
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 21:19
|
|
|
where we're going, you won't need eyes to see and then i gouged out my eyes. owned.
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 21:22
|
|
|
"I came here to kiss rear end and chew bubble gum.....would you like a piece of bubblegum sir?"
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 21:36
|
|
|
Assuming my bullies were familiar with any of the IP i referenced was a mistake. In reality I shouldve just endeared myself to them by shouting WWF Attitude Era catchphrases at the gym teacher like everyone els.
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 22:28
|
|
|
OP, have you ever considered if you didn't call movies shows that you wouldn't have gotten bullied as much?
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 22:36
|
|
|
SLICK GOKU BABY posted:OP, have you ever considered if you didn't call movies shows that you wouldn't have gotten bullied as much? Have you considered smelling what the ROCK IS COOKIN', NUMBNUTS!?!
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 22:40
|
|
|
Poohs Packin posted:Have you considered smelling what the ROCK IS COOKIN', NUMBNUTS!?! Don't sign your posts.
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 22:41
|
|
|
Ouch! My balls!
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 22:41
|
|
|
What is The Rock, Dwayne Jonson cooking anyway? I can still smell it. Time to get Kane on
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 22:43
|
|
|
I'm .... retarded?
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 22:45
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 24, 2024 03:51 |
|
|
*coughing up blood* What we've got here *pulling out a broken tooth* Is a failure to communicate
|
|
#
?
Dec 8, 2022 22:47
|
|