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Cone of Tragedy posted:For the Jewish Goons here I found a great Menorah for the holidays. A majestic lion, and it even comes circumcised. Sure to impress. loving lol
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Dec 12, 2022 16:49
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Dec 12, 2022 17:07
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Dec 12, 2022 18:16
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lol
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Dec 12, 2022 19:07
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Cone of Tragedy posted:For the Jewish Goons here I found a great Menorah for the holidays. A majestic lion, and it even comes circumcised. Sure to impress. i guess I'm going to target.
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Dec 12, 2022 19:19
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I'll be loading this unassuming package into the catapult today so it may reach my Santee before next moonfall, in accordance with the prophecy. I'm just starting to get into the holiday spirit. Buying gifts for strangers definitely helped.
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Dec 12, 2022 20:17
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I think I am the first to receive my gifts! Going to wait until next week to open them so it's a bit more festive.
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Dec 12, 2022 21:00
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Cone of Tragedy posted:For the Jewish Goons here I found a great Menorah for the holidays. A majestic lion, and it even comes circumcised. Sure to impress. I have never wanted a specific menorah until now but now I need the penis lion menorah. Need it.
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Dec 12, 2022 23:48
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https://www.target.com/p/lion-menorah-candle-holder-gold-threshold-8482/-/A-85714429 I mean it's even circumcised.
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Dec 13, 2022 00:29
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Cowslips Warren posted:https://www.target.com/p/lion-menorah-candle-holder-gold-threshold-8482/-/A-85714429 As an added treat if you look below the photos they even let you experience the King of the Junkle Hanukah Hog in all its 3D glory on there and waggle it around, or see it displayed in a variety of rooms, and even experience it in augmented reality.
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Dec 13, 2022 01:36
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nunsexmonkrock posted:OMG Everytime I visit my in-laws we get a duckie for thier dog. This time though we got a Squirrle because we think we bought all the ducks. But she loved it and took it immediately and hid it next to my father-in-laws head. Dogs and geese go together really well. Mostly.
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Dec 13, 2022 02:23
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CHRISTMAS LAUNCH DETECTED. The USPS seems to be awfully ambitious this year. It's admittedly only a six-hour drive, but they seem to think they can pull it off in a day or two.
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Dec 13, 2022 04:05
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A SASS miracle has occurred. I'm not a religious fellow, so I speak as someone touched by the spirit of SASS miracles. A package arrived today, addressed to Droogie, and from my Santa. Santa, you may be confused, and I understand. Not this year's santa, but last year's santa. Cone of Tragedy reached out and said that life had happened and things got pushed to the side, and we broke bread via PMs and today last year's present arrived. Apologies for massive, apparently I haven't resized a photo in imgur in a while, now it keeps the native size but reduces the image in the canvas?? I'm also too lazy tonight to put them all in a photo editor.  Angry bees? Don't threaten me with a good time.  Human tooth in a little jar? Cone knows me well. E- After popping the cork and tasting the contents, actually molded acrylic or similar. Still going with some of my animal bone displays, though!  Package did not lie. little angry bee. Some swag.  I can only assume the candy is a year old, and that will not stop me.  Wooden Marzipan- No paint needed, she's basically this color. Here's where the real magic is, though- hand painted ornaments of my cats.  Captain Spaulding Zedgar Bite   Cone even captured Zed's crusty eye. Zed was very keen to attack her likeness.  Whether I shared or not originally, this I'm choosing to be Tak, who we lost at the very end of 2020. Accurate.  Ripley refused to come down for this event. Ripley is my wife's cat whom she loves more than anything in this world, and she squealed with delight when I pulled this cat ornament out. Ripley was unimpressed, but she's almost 19.   Jonesie, who was enjoying some xmas light glow filtered through his own cat sneeze art. They now grace our pet-safe version of an xmas tree we put up each year.  Thank you, thank you, thank you Cone of Tragedy! I love it all. Droogie fucked around with this message at 05:30 on Dec 13, 2022 |
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Dec 13, 2022 05:27
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A beautiful miracle.
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Dec 13, 2022 06:48
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Droogie posted:Thank you, thank you, thank you Cone of Tragedy! I love it all. I am glad it all finally arrived! The skeleton cat is supposed to be the one in your avatar next to Spaulding, I painted them together on the same ornament as a nod. The frog pin is for a game called Tetrageddon that I thought was very in the spirit of the chaos and entertaining strangeness of Something Awful. It’s available for free. I met the creator at a convention and they were nice and gave me that pin. I used to work at one of the largest human tooth factories in the world and have a bunch of dental molds and oral prosthetics sitting around. I thought sending you a random disembodied gum with a hunk of tooth in it would be too weird so I figured a nice molar or something would be good. I misestimated the opening of the jar so you got one of the unfortunately less exciting loose teeth I have available. I had a lot of fun painting all your pets! Have a happy holiday! Cone of Tragedy fucked around with this message at 03:11 on Dec 14, 2022 |
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Dec 13, 2022 20:12
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 I went SASSmas shopping all over town and all through the mall on December 5th. I got myself a holiday latte and it was so much fun! I even saw Santa walking to go take pictures with the children, and I said "Hi!"  and he smiled back and said "Hello"- and I have to admit, the whole experience had me feeling like a giddy little kid about Christmas for the first time in a long time. Christmas felt kind of magical.I went to one store and had something bee-related in my hands and thought, "No, not this, I'll find something even better!" then I went to a few more places and never found something better, and then I had to go home before my rental car timer was up. Now I'm wrapping everything and all I've got are bee stickers. :whereistheSASSbeeEmoji: I've got my glue-gun and glitter out, so its about to get CRAFTY over here as I finish everything up! Has anybody had the chocolate they mail melt during shipping? EDIT: I dont know how to embed imugr photos anymore. Droogie posted:At this point you have to use the desktop site to get to the share links option at the top right of images as far as I know. EDIT: Thank you! Ulillinguist fucked around with this message at 04:04 on Dec 14, 2022 |
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Dec 14, 2022 03:33
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Ulillinguist posted:
At this point you have to use the desktop site to get to the share links option at the top right of images as far as I know.
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Dec 14, 2022 03:48
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I noticed my post history no longer includes a previous SASS I participated in (possibly 5+ years ago) and I'm not sure why, so I wanted to re-upload the gift I received here:    I put the inflatable unicorn horn on my cat, Oswald Cobblepot and he briefly tolerated it:  And also on my cat, Tiggy, who did not tolerate it:  This was the handmade nail polish ornatment I receieved that I still have:  Sadly, my cat Ozzy passed away last August 2021 and this will be my second Christmas without him. And my cat Tiggy passed away this June 2022 and it will be my first Christmas with out him. Both deaths came unexpectedly, but I still talk to them every day. I wanted to share the photos of my kitties here along with everyone else's animals. Ulillinguist fucked around with this message at 05:49 on Dec 14, 2022 |
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Dec 14, 2022 04:12
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Ulillinguist posted:I noticed my post history no longer includes a previous SASS I participated in (possibly 5+ years ago) and I'm not sure why, so I wanted to re-upload the gift I received here: Those are some very squishy kitties. Sorry you are spending the holidays without them.
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Dec 14, 2022 16:50
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Dear Santee, I am disappointed to report that a thing I ordered two weeks ago for your package only JUST SHIPPED OUT, so your package is going to be a little late.
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Dec 15, 2022 15:28
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Santa has not responded to my misspelled entreaty to fight me IRL for some reason.
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Dec 15, 2022 15:40
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hey if s/he is not willing to fight I can probably take up that part if you are local to South Philly, mind you my aunt is a karate champion that has a trophy taller than her and has taught me quite a few moves - however I am more of a lover than a fighter and would prefer to cuddle someone to death - if cuddles can actually kill or cause harm, but I think not.
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Dec 15, 2022 16:12
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nunsexmonkrock posted:hey if s/he is not willing to fight I can probably take up that part if you are local to South Philly, mind you my aunt is a karate champion that has a trophy taller than her and has taught me quite a few moves - however I am more of a lover than a fighter and would prefer to cuddle someone to death - if cuddles can actually kill or cause harm, but I think not. Depends on how you cuddle.
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Dec 15, 2022 18:06
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SANTEE! Your package will be on its way shortly! It has been thoroughly inspected by customs!  And is clearly labeled! 
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Dec 15, 2022 18:08
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My gift to my actual Santee is shipped! They won't be opening it until a few days after it arrives though so I will need to be patient. I got to do something a little different this year. I hope they enjoy my mix of slightly experimental handmade projects and store bought questionable treasures.
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Dec 15, 2022 18:35
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Ulillinguist posted:Sadly, my cat Ozzy passed away last August 2021 and this will be my second Christmas without him. And my cat Tiggy passed away this June 2022 and it will be my first Christmas with out him. Both deaths came unexpectedly, but I still talk to them every day. I wanted to share the photos of my kitties here along with everyone else's animals.  My kitty passed away in October on 2020 at the age of 20, he is missed. I'm kinda hoping to adopt a pair in the new year, if I'm feeling up to that. Here are a few photos starting with one of him being festive,   On brighter news, my Santee should be receiving their stuff before Christmas and I also hope they enjoy what I picked out!
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Dec 15, 2022 19:15
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 SANTA CAME!!! At first, Santa asked me if I was okay with booze. Hmm..... USPS says it's coming from Chicago.  The box arrived and could best be described as "sloshy"...  Is my hypothesis correct?!   MALÖÖÖÖÖÖÖRT! And not one Malört; a sixer! Plus a mug to sip them from, and moonshine to wash my mouth out with!  E: there is also a bag that matches the mug that I forgot to photograph! Hello! My new friend!  Would you care to join me for a drink?!  ...never mind!  A cool wooden L/El (there seems to be some debate...) train magnet, and a postcard revealing the horrible monster who did this to me... Emily Spinach!  Thank you so much for the cool stuff! After all these years, the Malört fairy has finally smiled upon me in SASS. (Space reserved for when I actually try it...)
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Dec 15, 2022 21:54
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Droogie posted:
Those hand painted ornaments are really adorable - I love their little smiles! And your pet-safe tree is very inventive. LadyPictureShow posted:Hello! My new friend! Now this is the sort of Christmas bee stuff I was looking for! Looks like an excellent drinking buddy to squeeze onto when your mouth puckers around the drink I've seen described as "burning garbage and Ricola" Ulillinguist fucked around with this message at 03:15 on Dec 16, 2022 |
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Dec 16, 2022 03:11
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Ulillinguist posted:Those hand painted ornaments are really adorable - I love their little smiles! And your pet-safe tree is very inventive. Thank you- I've posted some of it before, it's been referred to the S&M Xmas tree here before, but my god does it work well. It holds up year after year, the ornaments are safe, the animals love to stare at it, and there's zero footprint. I hope to post a little more of it this weekend some time.
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Dec 16, 2022 03:18
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Cone of Tragedy posted:Those are some very squishy kitties. Sorry you are spending the holidays without them. Thank you. Keeping myself busy with SASS has helped a lot, this has created a lot of holiday cheer for me. digitalist posted:
Aww, I'm sorry for your loss too. He was an especially handsome boy and I love how his eyes sparkle in the light of the holiday festivities!
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Dec 16, 2022 03:22
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Spiderjelly has sent a present! Photos came out grainy at first, but let's see what we can do! Hmm, Izzy is reporting 3.6 roentgen, not great, but not terrible. Package clears muster.  Important messages from Comrades on High! An Invisible Enemy has escaped containment! Am I rad enough dude to face this threat? No, which is why I'm sending some Heroes of SASSMAS to check things out!  Fearless Christmas Jazz Cat has discovered Nuclear Fuel Rods! They glow nice and pretty at night! Critics are raving (in delirium!)  Snoopy has discovered Nuclear Coolant! Comrade Politburo recommends against drinking it however, as it's from Florida.  Gizmo has become a Hero of the Soviet Union. There's also a sweet watch in here with a Soviet Submarine! They don't sink, unless they're supposed to! Photos of the watch didn't turn out for some reason. Too much time in the old spicy box perhaps.  There's also a copy of Goodnight Goon(!), two bottles of Vodka, a mysterious Flash Drive containing four highly classified files, Christmas Spirit and lots of Gamma Radiation. Here's the haul with all the perfectly healthy survivors of this year's SASSMAS! Thanks, SANTA! I wish you much prosperity over next Five Years! (And I've just received confirmation that Santee has received my package. SASSMAS is truly mutually assured!)
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Dec 16, 2022 03:49
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LadyPictureShow posted:the horrible monster who did this to me... Yay! If you can find Old Style near you you'll have the makings of a Chicago handshake.
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Dec 16, 2022 04:35
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Ulillinguist posted:Thank you. Keeping myself busy with SASS has helped a lot, this has created a lot of holiday cheer for me. If you PM me your info I will try to send you some cat stuff in their memory when I have some time again to make it if you like. It may not get done before x-mas since I might be traveling but I will try to make something if I can. Let me know.
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Dec 16, 2022 04:35
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Grammarchist posted:Spiderjelly has sent a present! Photos came out grainy at first, but let's see what we can do! Glad you liked your deadly present! A couple of notes, since you're into history and trinkets. That medal is a Chernobyl liquidator medal, ostensibly original, and the watch is a Vostok Komandirskie, which themselves have a long and interesting history.
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Dec 16, 2022 05:15
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Spiderjelly posted:Glad you liked your deadly present! A couple of notes, since you're into history and trinkets. That medal is a Chernobyl liquidator medal, ostensibly original, and the watch is a Vostok Komandirskie, which themselves have a long and interesting history. Thanks! I admit I was curious. I was going to ask one of my Russian ex-pat friends, but that saves me the trouble. Gizmo refused the medal, because she's in it for love of the Motherland, not recognition, so I guess it's going somewhere prominent.
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Dec 16, 2022 05:24
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Grammarchist posted:Thanks! I admit I was curious. I was going to ask one of my Russian ex-pat friends, but that saves me the trouble. Gizmo refused the medal, because she's in it for love of the Motherland, not recognition, so I guess it's going somewhere prominent. Oh, and I put an aftermarket NATO (lol) strap on. You're meant to trim the tail to fit your wrist.
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Dec 16, 2022 05:32
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yay my santa has sent a message that my package is mailed out YAYAY! So excitied! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ytg_h1eIiPM
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Dec 16, 2022 23:16
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My santa asked me to post my cat in the thread, so you all can enjoy  Here he is basking in the light of the christmas tree :  and here he is protecting the city:  Still looking for a buddy for him.
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Dec 17, 2022 19:36
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Ulillinguist posted:I noticed my post history no longer includes a previous SASS I participated in (possibly 5+ years ago) and I'm not sure why, so I wanted to re-upload the gift I received here: Hey, those gifts look familiar— Ahh, you were my Santee!!! I still live in a city where there’s a bunch of Moravian culture (and they still make pretty baller sweets and lovely pure beeswax candles with the pretty red ruffles for their Christmas vespers service). And I still have a ton of little wooden snowmen I painted with my mom as a kid, and nail polish ornaments I’m still giving away. Welcome back to SASS, friend! And condolences on losing your lovely kitties. I’ve lost four of my own since that SASSmas. 
Ars Arcanum fucked around with this message at 00:13 on Dec 18, 2022 |
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Dec 18, 2022 00:10
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The time has finally come where it doesn't feel too early to open the prezzies! I was the grateful recipient of three packages, and I started with the smallest one first....  ONE HUNDRED axolotl stickers! I love stickers and I love axolotls, so well done Santa. I duly added some to my laptop and my bed.    Next up... Food? From THE INTERNET? (it's more likely than you think)  Ooh, what could it be?  Booja Booja chocolates! I've bought these a couple of times for other people, but they're a bit too spenny for a treat for myself, so I'm stoked to finally get to try some. Moving on to the next box, it's Lowtaxidermy. Also from THE INTERNET!   Taxidermy Goes Wild, a photo book of cute/creepy/strange taxidermies. I enjoyed finding a festive one right away. Now, at this point the Beast woke up and looked askance, clearly unimpressed by my rustling and rummaging disturbing her 68th nap of the day.  After placating her, I moved on to my final present. And a threat of bees.  What could this bee?  A beautiful moth! My friends have a very annoying joke about me and moths, so they're going to love that I got sent this. Very good fake bee, the colours are so vibrant - ain't nature good.  Wednesday is unimpressed. Not edible, what's the point? Thank you so much, Santa! I love my gifts. I have to assume you are literally THE INTERNET, but hoping you appear soon to confirm. I appreciate your diligence making sure things could make it through the posties' strikes, too. I'm looking forward to stickering many things, leafing through this book some more, finding the perfect spot to hang my 'bee' and munching these chocolates (still debating whether to share with my partner...) Bollock Monkey fucked around with this message at 08:21 on Dec 20, 2022 |
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Dec 18, 2022 21:26
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