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Piggy Smalls
Jun 21, 2015



BOSS MAKES A DOLLAR,
YOU MAKE A DIME,
I'LL LICK HIS BOOT TILL THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS SHINE.

As I am quickly approaching 55 years of age (in July) I have seen friends about my age or younger passing due to heart attacks, brain cancer, and other ailments. Today I was hit hard when I learned a family member has ALS. To be honest I really didn’t know too much about the disease but now after researching it I can say this is likely one of the worst ways to die.

As for me I had a heart attack at age 44.

I know we all die but some ways are just worse than others. drat.

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mekyabetsu
Dec 17, 2018

If it makes you feel any better, I’ve recently learned that anyone over the age of 30 is pretty much the root cause of class inequality and deserves to die.

Pajser
Jan 28, 2006
if it makes you feel better OP, I have never licked boots and I never will

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

I've always believed dying should be as comfortable and painless as possible.

Harold Fjord
Jan 3, 2004

mekyabetsu posted:

If it makes you feel any better, I’ve recently learned that anyone over the age of 30 is pretty much the root cause of class inequality and deserves to die.

I've been saying for a minute, we need a max age.

We were never meant to live so long that we rule our great grandchildren and destroy all cultural changes they embrace

hot cocoa on the couch
Dec 8, 2009

mekyabetsu posted:

If it makes you feel any better, I’ve recently learned that anyone over the age of 30 is pretty much the root cause of class inequality and deserves to die.

drat bro 30? number keeps moving down

hot cocoa on the couch
Dec 8, 2009

anyway go post in your wife hates me thread op. we need more details

satanic splash-back
Jan 28, 2009

OP Posts about his wife being mad at him, then posts about mortality.

Somebody get this man a suicide hotline or domestic abuse phone number!

hot cocoa on the couch
Dec 8, 2009

satanic splash-back posted:

OP Posts about his wife being mad at him, then posts about mortality.

Somebody get this man a suicide hotline or domestic abuse phone number!

lol true goddamn. my wife hates me and makes me sleep on the couch lmfao!!!!!! anyway any one else thinking about dying a lot lately?

Edmund Sparkler
Jul 4, 2003
For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

A Mortality in Mortal Kombat is where you just wait the amount of real time it takes until your opponent dies of natural causes.

neato burrito
Aug 25, 2002

bitch better have my chex mix

Some people didn't even get the amount of time that I've already gotten; and that seems unfair.

Icochet
Mar 18, 2008

I have a very small TV. Don't make fun of it! Please don't shame it like that~

Grimey Drawer
I've always depised the dead and dying

Icochet
Mar 18, 2008

I have a very small TV. Don't make fun of it! Please don't shame it like that~

Grimey Drawer
Going to someone's funeral is enabling them

mutantIke
Oct 24, 2022

Born in '04
Certified Zoomer
Can't relate. :smuggo:

Space Kablooey
May 6, 2009


lmao youre 55 and you cant even talk to your wife about your marital problems

Mozi
Apr 4, 2004

Forms change so fast
Time is moving past
Memory is smoke
Gonna get wider when I die
Nap Ghost
it's true that mortality weighs heavily 'pon one's brow as time and loss extract their inevitable dues, but it is no small consolation to be able to share the present moment, in whatever form it may take, with one's soulmate and partn... ooor us, who are great too!

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER

Pajser posted:

if it makes you feel better OP, I have never licked boots and I never will

licking a hot chick's boots while she hold your leash is one of life's simple pleasures

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER
also, coward

hot cocoa on the couch
Dec 8, 2009

kntfkr posted:

licking a hot chick's boots while she hold your leash is one of life's simple pleasures

op licks his bosses boots while he holds ops metaphorical, capitalist leash

hot cocoa on the couch
Dec 8, 2009

Mozi posted:

it's true that mortality weighs heavily 'pon one's brow as time and loss extract their inevitable dues, but it is no small consolation to be able to share the present moment, in whatever form it may take, with one's soulmate and partn... ooor us, who are great too!

agreed mozi. spending time with the people you love like your wonderful children, friends and parrtner and enjoying shared activities with them is the fastest way to lift the weight of impending mortality off of oneself anmd to truly live in the moment. and i try to live that way every day. and one of the most important ways you can do that is to not spend $600 on dinenr with your wife who hates you and makes you sleep on the couch, with money you earned at your job where you police the bathroom and regulate peoples making GBS threads, despite garnering no respect from your boss while he honks a penny into your porkpie hat for yuor troubles

fishing with the fam
Feb 29, 2008

Durr
Mortality rules. It's very comforting to know that a day will come where I don't have to deal with any of this bullshit anymore.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Try being dead inside, it's like death with training wheels

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
I hope I'll get to go peacefully and in my sleep like a taxi driver and not screaming for help like their passengers lol

hot cocoa on the couch
Dec 8, 2009

i hope i die in an awesomne extremely cool way like burning to death in a race car or falling from a great height doing some outdoor rock climbing

Icochet
Mar 18, 2008

I have a very small TV. Don't make fun of it! Please don't shame it like that~

Grimey Drawer
Gonna die intestate as gently caress

hot cocoa on the couch
Dec 8, 2009

dying from cancer or w/e is some bitchmade poo poo

mutantIke
Oct 24, 2022

Born in '04
Certified Zoomer
You ever notice how the only people who worry about death are alive?

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Wow vampires aren't people then I guess huh

ManBoyChef
Aug 1, 2019

Deadbeat Dad



I have def had some brushes with mortality. Now I hope I die doing something really pointless. Die the capitalist way.

OP so, uh, what's the situation with your wife? can you slip me her number?

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Can I have the couch when you wander off into the desert?

kntfkr
Feb 11, 2019

GOOSE FUCKER

hot cocoa on the couch posted:

i hope i die in an awesomne extremely cool way like burning to death in a race car or falling from a great height doing some outdoor rock climbing

at ayahuasca this past new years there was a guy there whose dad died by crashing into the ocean while hang gliding and it seemed to not do wonders for the family.

i plan on going out like david carradine

Smugworth
Apr 18, 2003

My wife took a crap in the hall toilet even though I expressly asked her to crap in the basement toilet and now she's mad at me and I have to sleep on the couch

Women, am I right fellas?

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!

hot cocoa on the couch posted:

op licks his bosses boots while he holds ops metaphorical, capitalist leash

Tongue cleans her hubbys toilet, but then wants smoochies afterwards. :barf:

Zeluth
May 12, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
ALS is brutal. It is good to appreciate what you have every once in a while.

Jelly
Feb 11, 2004

Ask me about my STD collection!
I've always thought the trope where some fortune teller or mutant tells you how you die is dumb as hell.

Like if it's something really lovely like "Oh, you're going to die super painfully from irreversible testicular torsion next Wednesday," nobody is going to wait for that to happen, on Tuesday they'll just blow their brains out or go have a doctor chop off their balls or something.

Then the mutant/fortune teller is a liar no matter what.

ClamdestineBoyster
Aug 15, 2015
Probation
Can't post for 10 years!

Jelly posted:

I've always thought the trope where some fortune teller or mutant tells you how you die is dumb as hell.

Like if it's something really lovely like "Oh, you're going to die super painfully from irreversible testicular torsion next Wednesday," nobody is going to wait for that to happen, on Tuesday they'll just blow their brains out or go have a doctor chop off their balls or something.

Then the mutant/fortune teller is a liar no matter what.

Yeah like, there was a fortune teller/used car lot around here and I was like, I bet you could get some useful info there, “ah yes, I see 90,000 problem free miles on this ‘02 hatchback”. If you want a decent gypsy wagon start at the top of the line fella. :fella:

hot cocoa on the couch
Dec 8, 2009

lol and praytell, cb, what exactly is a gypsy wagon?

central dogma
Feb 25, 2012

Come to the Undead Settlement in the next 20 mins if u want an ash kicking
I'm mortal, last time I checked. Don't see me bellyachin' over it.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon

Jelly posted:

I've always thought the trope where some fortune teller or mutant tells you how you die is dumb as hell.

Like if it's something really lovely like "Oh, you're going to die super painfully from irreversible testicular torsion next Wednesday," nobody is going to wait for that to happen, on Tuesday they'll just blow their brains out or go have a doctor chop off their balls or something.

Then the mutant/fortune teller is a liar no matter what.

Nah the doctor will just gently caress up the ballchop so bad that he gives you death testicular torsion, do you even prophecy

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Nooner
Mar 26, 2011

AN A+ OPSTER (:
Lol clammy gonna catch a proby for saying the g word

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