|
if i could do it over i would have done the thing we can do in canada where the parents can split the employment insurance backed parental leave rather than my wife taking it all. i just had the one week off when mini logins was born
|
#
?
Feb 17, 2023 16:30
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 23, 2024 23:05 |
|
|
for our first I only had a week off, and at the time there was no wfh and I think it was incredibly hard on my wife, in combination with ppd and just generally adjusting to everything. thankfully with my second I was able to take three weeks off thanks to PTO + 2 weeks paternity that was introduced after the first was born, and for our third I had five weeks off due to her being born the day before the Christmas shutdown + 2 weeks PTO, and I was wfh for both, so it was much less brutal on the missus I’ve never been given beef about taking so long off, but I also refuse to work for non-euro corps at this point in my career
|
|
#
?
Feb 17, 2023 16:48
|
|
|
I had two weeks and then Covid hit and my company forced us to start burning leave and I ended up -40 hours of pto but they were still forcing people to not work 2 days a week and to prevent my coworkers from getting pissed they asked me not to tell anyone I was not working while also not charging pto and I told them anyway because gently caress you what a lovely time
|
|
#
?
Feb 17, 2023 16:50
|
|
|
we had our kids while I was at uni, which meant I could be around the kids more also taking babies into uni is a good way to get people to go "aww" and think im a cool dad
|
|
#
?
Feb 17, 2023 17:14
|
|
|
echinopsis posted:we had our kids while I was at uni, which meant I could be around the kids more lol I took my puppy to class for a week and that was a blast
|
|
#
?
Feb 17, 2023 17:17
|
|
|
Kenny Logins posted:cool. when i was in the thick of it i just got told to sort of generally get/keep my poo poo together by someone who left his wife and kids shortly the second was born. jeebus bob posted:Lol yeah same except my boss had just one child who was currently in the last year of med school. Zero empathy while I was in the last year of a contract employment and with two kids in diapers. FAT32 SHAMER posted:for our first I only had a week off, and at the time there was no wfh and I think it was incredibly hard on my wife, in combination with ppd and just generally adjusting to everything.
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 12:21
|
|
|
echinopsis posted:we had our kids while I was at uni, which meant I could be around the kids more i was in school when our oldest was born so i was at home a lot too which was fortunate because my wife was still working nights then. didn’t have to pay for childcare for like two years.
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 14:28
|
|
|
nice when I was an intern (with 2 kids under 5) I worked mon-fri and my (now ex) wife did 2 x 12 hour night shifts on the weekend at time and a half it meant no child care costs.. but it was hard work. especially on the ex wife, those night shifts really hosed with her, mondays were a complete write off and god her mood.... eeeeeek lol
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 15:12
|
|
|
Found out that we're having a girl. I can't wait to meet her... 5 months to go and I'm buying baby stuff online at 2AM on a Sunday morning over here. I just impulse bought box sets of books, even though it's far too early. Dr. Seuss, Little Miss, and Goosebumps (those are for me). All my wife's friends are offering their baby stuff to us and I have no idea what we're getting.
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 17:13
|
|
|
Accept everything and regift what you dont need. Baby poo poo is so drat expensive for something that gets 2 months of use (if ur lucky). We have been getting and giving like a huge tote of baby clothes every couple months.
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 17:59
|
|
|
we bought maybe 3 pieces of clothing for our baby. the rest comes from gifts, friends giving us their baby stuff, or a place called "sos future mom" that has mountains of clothes to give away. they have so much that last time we went there to give some clothes that didn't fit, they flat out refused, pointing to the pile of garbage bags. don't buy baby clothes unless it's a pretty little outfit for christmas or something
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 18:08
|
|
|
SpaceAceJase posted:Found out that we're having a girl. sort the clothes into sizes as they come in (and clearly label!) and you'll thank yourself later
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 18:13
|
|
|
also, don't know where you live, but with 5 months to go, you'll have a summer baby. get rid of the winter stuff thats too small, and the summer stuff that's too big. i swear you'll be drowning in baby clothes very soon
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 18:38
|
|
|
SpaceAceJase posted:I just impulse bought box sets of books, even though it's far too early. be prepared for books you remember as being great actually being really weird. the cat in the hat is a goddamn menace.
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 22:53
|
|
|
i had this favorite book called matthew and the midnight tow truck. no joke, it’s about a kid who wakes up at night and sees a tow truck outside. so he sneaks out without his mom knowing, and the tow truck driver lures the kid inside with toy cars and liquorice. the tow truck driver is smoking in every illustration. they go around town towing people’s cars and shrinking them to toy-size in a magic car wash. this is the author lol 
|
|
#
?
Feb 18, 2023 23:04
|
|
|
alternately, buy baby clothes if you want to
|
|
#
?
Feb 19, 2023 00:13
|
|
|
I think I took 6 weeks. We did a thing where some of the statutory entitlement from my wife was transferred to me so I got 100% pay for the full 6 instead of the minimum 2. needless to say, my HR department made a complete mess of this actually standard and company policy thing, including iirc the statement "oh you wanted to be paid during this?"
|
|
#
?
Feb 19, 2023 01:37
|
|
|
Corla Plankun posted:sort the clothes into sizes as they come in (and clearly label!) and you'll thank yourself later I actually shoved the various clothes into gallon sized freezer bags labeled in permanent marker, because they were so tiny and were only good for so long, then stuck all the packets into a large bin that could be put under a bed or something. You're going to need more clothes than you think, because they're going to blast through their diaper onto clothes, and the best do it multiple times in the day leading to not enough clothes. Remember that the clothes are for the adults to see and care about, not the kid. Reuse stained clothes or whatever, kiddo won't mind and grandparents have been there too (with you lol) Try to give the baby clothes away to other people if you can, they're liable to just get landfilled if you donate them  Precook many, many meals. You will be too tired to actually make anything, just store endless casseroles that can be thrown into an oven and then eaten when warm.
|
|
#
?
Feb 19, 2023 02:49
|
|
|
Volmarias posted:
i'm finding this to be mostly true through 7 years and am assuming it'll last a couple more
|
|
#
?
Feb 19, 2023 02:57
|
|
|
i bought my children only adult clothes when they were born and they’ll just have to grow into them.
|
|
#
?
Feb 19, 2023 02:57
|
|
|
Volmarias posted:I actually shoved the various clothes into gallon sized freezer bags labeled in permanent marker, because they were so tiny and were only good for so long, then stuck all the packets into a large bin that could be put under a bed or something. You're going to need more clothes than you think, because they're going to blast through their diaper onto clothes, and the best do it multiple times in the day leading to not enough clothes. Yeah all of this. They grow fast, so you want categories like 0-3 mo, 3-6mo, 6-12mo. After 12mo the slope on the growth curve flattens out a little. Another good idea is to pre-make snacks like muffins and things. Breastfeeding takes a lot of calories. Big batches of boiled eggs as you go too. Corla Plankun posted:my daughter had four squishmallows before I had even ever heard the term Yeah this is the thing. In the worst case you just have a mound of soft throw cushions that happen to have faces.
|
|
#
?
Feb 19, 2023 03:07
|
|
|
Check in Facebook to see if there is a Buy Nothing or parent's group for your area. we've probably hit four figures worth of free stuff by now.
|
|
#
?
Feb 19, 2023 03:13
|
|
|
lol now we get woken up at 3am by high volume blasts of "a b c d", "row your boat" and "wheels on the bus" at least she's learning the alphabet though I guess
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 11:59
|
|
|
Powerful Two-Hander posted:lol now we get woken up at 3am by high volume blasts of "a b c d", "row your boat" and "wheels on the bus" Orange: you can get up and play quietly Green: you're free to come demand bfast On weekends we let them have cartoons if they feed and behave themselves. I was *so* glad when we got to that point.
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 13:29
|
|
|
evil_bunnY posted:Getting a loving wake up clock was one of the things that bought us the most sleep time. having a red light sleep setting is still pretty handy for when she wakes up in the middle of the night or else way way too early. i'm hoping we can use yellow as "morning quiet play" soon now that she's older and she can tell us when she's too hungry to play quietly anymore
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 13:38
|
|
|
evil_bunnY posted:Getting a loving wake up clock was one of the things that bought us the most sleep time. yeah we're gonna get something like this as she's nearly at the "drop the side of the cot and let her run free in her room" age (with the door blocked via a gate,obvs). we're already pretty bad at letting her watch TV in the mornings though, so that ship has sailed
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 13:54
|
|
|
Kenny Logins posted:we have one of those (mella) but it backfired as the yellow light for quiet play looks a bit too close to green. our kid would always come over to ask if it was yellow or green, defeating the purpose entirely I almost made a sleep clock myself because they're not popular around here, but the kids loved the one model we could find in a store. Then it broke and had to be exchanged after a week because of course. The sleeping is pretty under control nowadays (they;re 6 and 9). evil_bunnY fucked around with this message at 15:33 on Feb 20, 2023 |
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 14:44
|
|
|
Powerful Two-Hander posted:lol now we get woken up at 3am by high volume blasts of "a b c d", "row your boat" and "wheels on the bus" 
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 14:49
|
|
|
little kids are so freaking cute
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 14:49
|
|
|
evil_bunnY posted:Hahahahaha I would have yeet'ed that thing out the window SO fast, you're a better person than I.
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 15:37
|
|
|
i highly recommend blackout curtains for your kids rooms as well we have one bedroom that faces east and two that face west, and thanks to blackout curtains the 2.5yo in the east room wakes up last
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 15:46
|
|
|
FAT32 SHAMER posted:i highly recommend blackout curtains for your kids rooms as well
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 15:59
|
|
|
I have to vent a bit and say that it really sucks how much organized kids activities can vary in quality and depend on the other kids involved. we've been doing "music together" classes. very much not my comfort zone or Thing but that's part of the reason to take him to experience new stuff. the first set of classes was good, and he went from "what the gently caress is this?" to trying to sing and getting excited when he heard the start of certain songs. the second set was fantastic. there was considerably better song selection and Mini Pony started dancing some as well as improvising variations on the songs at home. there was a rather annoying kid who tried to get up to stuff on occasion, but the class was fairly small and the parents kept him in check so it worked well. this third set of sessions is so bad we are dropping it midway through. the songs suck rear end with only one being anything like an earworm and the class is full so there's less room. but most of all That Kid is back and has graduated from being annoying to being a full blown rear end in a top hat kid. any time another kid is doing anything but sitting with their parents That Kid runs up to them and stays inches away from their face actively blocking them from continuing to do what they were doing. not only does That Kid sprint to turn off all the lights for a quiet song instead of taking turns, in the rare case that he doesn't make it first he will undo another kid's actions by turning the lights on for a few seconds then turning it off again while grinning at the kid. if an instrument gets accidentally dropped by another kid you'd better believe That Kid will be there to grab it and run off. his parents now might come along 10 seconds after he does whatever but at that point the damage is done. this last time That Kid elbowed his way in front of the window that Mini Pony was looking at (only to turn and grin at Mini Pony instead of looking out the window) and when Mini Pony kinda started to dance later in the class That Kid sprinted up to Mini Pony holding the foam baffle out from a drum and (lightly) smacked Mini Pony in the arm with it while preventing the dancing by standing inches away. Mini Pony has gone from singing and dancing at midway through the class to getting into one of the 2'x2' storage cubbies along the back wall and shaking his head when we ask if he would like to dance or sing (playing the instruments is still a win). sorry Huxton, you are A Fucker right now. I really hope you parents wise up to the reason they only ever find out about a play date after it happens and reconsider their parenting strategy of letting you be a complete jerk to other kids for fun.
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 16:54
|
|
|
ive been making a point to watch older (the classics) disney movies with my toddler and they captivate her so much more than modern kids stuff with cgi, i dunno if its the art style or all the songs or what We watched alice in wonderland last night and holy poo poo this movie is weirder than anyone remembers.
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 19:38
|
|
|
I hate the cgi stuff in kids TV, it's too close to those hosed up YouTube "cartoons". I wish netflix had a way of disabling suggestions for kids because I don't mind reruns of peppa pig but every so often she'll spot something and we end up with some garbage for a week because she won't let it go last week it was "daniel tiger's neighborhood" which is terrible
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 19:52
|
|
|
just remember, when you feel like you want to roar, take a deep breath and count to four
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 20:23
|
|
|
Powerful Two-Hander posted:I hate the cgi stuff in kids TV, it's too close to those hosed up YouTube "cartoons". daniel tiger isn't too bad tbqh, good messages and songs and whatnot since it has the animating spirit of pittaburgh's native son fred rogers behind it. but if you hate the look you hate the look and that's fine! there's a reason bluey is hyper popular
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 21:41
|
|
|
Powerful Two-Hander posted:I wish netflix had a way of disabling suggestions for kids because I don't mind reruns of peppa pig but every so often she'll spot something and we end up with some garbage for a week because she won't let it go oh man wait until they get a bit older and start finding stuff like "is it cake" and "floor is lava" i blocked the former from showing up in netflix searches but if i do that to floor is lava now i'm pretty sure she'll figure it out
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 22:18
|
|
|
I’ve started restricting the kids to just like, Mickey Mouse, bluey, max and ruby, and paw patrol after noticing they turn into zombies with cocomelon in any amount media seems to be explicitly attempting to hypnotise kids nowadays and it’s insane
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 22:19
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 23, 2024 23:05 |
|
|
paw patrol is actively harmful to kids and i hate it. still manages to infiltrate our home sometimes though.
|
|
#
?
Feb 20, 2023 22:22
|
|