the empire runs on duncan

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > the empire runs on duncan

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qirex: Feb 15, 2001

talk about a NCC 1701 D

# ? Mar 4, 2023 19:08

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# ? Apr 19, 2024 22:19

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; a medium-format picture of beeftweeter staring silently at the camera, a quizzical expression on his face

qirex posted:

talk about a NCC 1701 D

mf got a galaxy class dick

# ? Mar 4, 2023 19:09

Farmer Crack-Ass: Jan 2, 2001; this is me posting irl

Sagebrush posted:

We know that data's dick works, but do you think he is capable of blasting loads?

fully. functional.

# ? Mar 4, 2023 19:12

mystes: May 31, 2006

Beeftweeter posted:

i wonder if his loads are big and sticky

they're veritable data lakes

# ? Mar 4, 2023 19:16

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012

Farmer Crack-rear end posted:

fully. functional.

Yeah but he wasn't able to have an orgasm until the borg queen glued skin onto him, so clearly there are varying definitions of what a sex bot needs to be "fully functional."

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:19

Achmed Jones: Oct 16, 2004

y all are nasty

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:20

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; a medium-format picture of beeftweeter staring silently at the camera, a quizzical expression on his face

Sagebrush posted:

Yeah but he wasn't able to have an orgasm until the borg queen glued skin onto him, so clearly there are varying definitions of what a sex bot needs to be "fully functional."

in first contact he wasn't able to feel sensation because his emotion chip wasn't active, that's not the same thing. and even if he could, what does it matter?

he's basically functioning as a mechanical dildo. data by default can't feel anything, and certainly not during TNG season 1 when he bangs tasha yar because she's horny, not him

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:23

Sweevo: Nov 8, 2007; i sometimes throw cables away

i mean straight into the bin without spending 10+ years in the box of might-come-in-handy-someday first

im a fucking monster

doesn't data weigh some huge amount?

so she would have to go on top

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:43

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012

Only 220 lb according to the internet. He's also incredibly strong so I'm sure he could just hold himself up

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:51

pseudorandom name: May 6, 2007

he also has some kind of levitation device so he can swim

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:52

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

pseudorandom name posted:

he also has some kind of levitation device so he can swim

if he weighs 220lb and is the size and shape of a human he should be just as buoyant as a human without the device

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:52

echinopsis: Apr 13, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Beeftweeter posted:

yeah i wonder what data's dick is like. and, what it smells like. you know, as a joke ha ha

i wonder if his loads are big and sticky, also as a joke. are they stored in his balls ha ha ha they're probably mouse balls i wonder what they feel like

quoting for prosperity

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:53

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012

haveblue posted:

if he weighs 220lb and is the size and shape of a human he should be just as buoyant as a human without the device

He's the size and shape of like 170 lb human though

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:53

Sweevo: Nov 8, 2007; i sometimes throw cables away

i mean straight into the bin without spending 10+ years in the box of might-come-in-handy-someday first

im a fucking monster

lets be honest, she probably just told him "ok buzz like a sybian for 30 minutes, and no peeking!"

# ? Mar 4, 2023 20:58

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Sagebrush posted:

He's the size and shape of like 170 lb human though

just get him some water wings then

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:03

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; a medium-format picture of beeftweeter staring silently at the camera, a quizzical expression on his face

data himself says he is trained in "multiple techniques", i'm sure he was able to figure something out

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:08

Farmer Crack-Ass: Jan 2, 2001; this is me posting irl

Beeftweeter posted:

in first contact he wasn't able to feel sensation because his emotion chip wasn't active, that's not the same thing. and even if he could, what does it matter?

he's basically functioning as a mechanical dildo. data by default can't feel anything, and certainly not during TNG season 1 when he bangs tasha yar because she's horny, not him

this whole loving tangent started when someone posted a screenshot of data acting uncharacteristically emotional because he was under the influence of the fuckin' polywater "virus", so either he was 'under the influence' in a way that allowed him to experience orgasm, or - like so many of his other functions and mannerisms - he chose to emulate an orgasm because that was an expected part of fuckin'

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:10

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; a medium-format picture of beeftweeter staring silently at the camera, a quizzical expression on his face

Farmer Crack-rear end posted:

this whole loving tangent started when someone posted a screenshot of data acting uncharacteristically emotional because he was under the influence of the fuckin' polywater "virus", so either he was 'under the influence' in a way that allowed him to experience orgasm, or - like so many of his other functions and mannerisms - he chose to emulate an orgasm because that was an expected part of fuckin'

yeah, that's the thing � data is a walking, talking human emulator

can he do all of those things? sure, but it's an approximation of expected behavior

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:14

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; a medium-format picture of beeftweeter staring silently at the camera, a quizzical expression on his face

ps i am so mad they brought the changelings back in picard, it doesn't make any sense

we're told in first contact and insurrection that the enterprise-E basically had nothing to do with the dominion war. why would a bunch of changelings be interested in wiping out the picard bloodline (that the man himself didn't even know existed?)

the answer, of course, is that ds9 was a better show than picard could ever hope to be, but it's loving downright weird that the TNG crew's final adventure is a ds9 follow-up

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:17

carry on then: Jul 10, 2010; by VideoGames
(and can't post for 10 years!)

Sagebrush posted:

He's the size and shape of like 170 lb human though

a large human the size of a small human, you say?

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:18

BaldDwarfOnPCP: Jun 26, 2019; by Pragmatica

Achmed Jones posted:

y all are nasty

we just want to know if androids cream in electric mmmcreep?

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:20

Kenny Logins: Jan 11, 2011; EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A WHITE WHALE INTO THE PEQUOD. IT'S HELL'S HEART AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I STRIKE AT THEE ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, ISHMAEL.

carry on then posted:

a large human the size of a small human, you say?

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:20

Farmer Crack-Ass: Jan 2, 2001; this is me posting irl

finished the first season of the ducktales reboot today. i kinda bounced off the first episode when i tried it as it was first coming out, but i recently gave it another go and got into it. it can be legit funny at times, and it also hooks deep into the nostalgia corner of my brain as i watched the original a whole hell of a lot as a kid, and read a shitload of scrooge mcduck comics as a kid too. season finale was surprisingly violent too, they had the kids throwing punches and gyro gearloose shooting a ray gun.

the callbacks to the old disney afternoon/saturday morning cartoons are fun too. darkwing duck as an in-universe tv show, the sky pirates from tale spin show up, also one episode made a sly reference to the gummi bears which i was hell of not expecting lol.

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:23

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012

carry on then posted:

a large human the size of a small human, you say?

No, a massive humanoid the size of a human of average mass.

# ? Mar 4, 2023 21:49

indigi: Jul 20, 2004; ^{how can we not talk about family

when family's all that we got?}

Sweevo posted:

lets be honest, she probably just told him "ok buzz like a sybian for 30 minutes, and no peeking!"

he hooked up with Mitch's mom??

# ? Mar 4, 2023 22:30

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

brent spiner is apparently 5'9 so neither a large nor a small human

# ? Mar 4, 2023 22:33

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; a medium-format picture of beeftweeter staring silently at the camera, a quizzical expression on his face

https://twitter.com/TerryMatalas/status/1631878281715916800

god drat you matalas don't make me like you

# ? Mar 5, 2023 00:32

echinopsis: Apr 13, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

Beeftweeter posted:

ps i am so mad they brought the changelings back in picard

lol every thread in yospos and probably wider has you posting about picard

# ? Mar 5, 2023 01:18

Beeftweeter: Jun 28, 2005; a medium-format picture of beeftweeter staring silently at the camera, a quizzical expression on his face

echinopsis posted:

lol every thread in yospos and probably wider has you posting about picard

it's very fun to rip on because there's a lot to make fun of lol

# ? Mar 5, 2023 01:51

AnimeIsTrash: Jun 30, 2018

echinopsis posted:

lol every thread in yospos and probably wider has you posting about picard

every thread in yospos is the same except for the cat thread

# ? Mar 5, 2023 02:25

ymgve: Jan 2, 2004; Offensive Clock

data's dick smells like a burning li-ion battery

# ? Mar 5, 2023 03:51

Sapozhnik: Jan 2, 2005; Nap Ghost

https://twitter.com/dril/status/862757324305334273

# ? Mar 5, 2023 05:02

NoneMoreNegative: Jul 20, 2000; GOTH FASCISTIC
PAIN MASTER

shit wizard dad

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XN3-__nZ_us

# ? Mar 6, 2023 00:05

Ornamental Dingbat: Feb 26, 2007

My kid and I just read through the hobbit for the 2nd time so I decided to show her these movies and goddamn did I forget about the Aragorn/Arwen love story crap they shoehorned into the films.

She really seems to be enjoying them though.

# ? Mar 6, 2023 00:16

Roosevelt: Jul 18, 2009; I'm looking for the man who shot my paw.

lol just found out they're remaking roadhouse. i just watched that again last weekend. if it's not a shot-by-shot reshoot and banned in theaters then i'm not interested

# ? Mar 6, 2023 01:16

Fart Sandwiches: Apr 4, 2006; i never asked for this

my kid is about to turn 3 and we just showed her ponyo. she has an eye mask she sleeps with that she will pull over her eyes if something is too exciting but for the most part it was just a fantastic journey for her. such a cute movie

# ? Mar 6, 2023 01:17

FAT32 SHAMER: Aug 16, 2012

Fart Sandwiches posted:

my kid is about to turn 3 and we just showed her ponyo. she has an eye mask she sleeps with that she will pull over her eyes if something is too exciting but for the most part it was just a fantastic journey for her. such a cute movie

I was thinking about showing my kids Ponyo, but I couldn�t remember if it and the other Miyazaki movies were 2 and 4 yo friendly. based on this, we�ll watch it this week!