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TheRationalRedditor
Jul 17, 2000

WHO ABUSED HIM. WHO ABUSED THE BOY.


You forgot DEATH BLOW

Kramer: "Death Blow: When someone tries to blow you up, not because of who you are, but for different reasons altogether!"

"You have selected...Agent Zero?"

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doug fuckey
Jun 7, 2007

hella greenbacks

I'm going to an autopsy for my A&P class this week, and I know it's not the same thing but that's still not stopping me from bringing junior mints.

They are, after all, very refreshing.

penis sandwich
Aug 28, 2004

have some pudding :)


hall n oates mom posted:

You forgot DEATH BLOW

Kramer: "Death Blow: When someone tries to blow you up, not because of who you are, but for different reasons altogether!"

"You have selected...Agent Zero?"

Why don't you just tell me the name of the movie you'd like to see!

Parachute
May 18, 2003


Man: I didn't know you enjoyed chess, your majesty.
King: Why wouldn't I?
Man: Because the king is always in jeopardy.
King: Yes, but it's only a game.
Man: Yes, of course. Only a game.

Dr_Amazing
Apr 15, 2006

It's a long story

DrBouvenstein posted:

I loved all the fake movies they came up with.

"Sack Lunch" Look at them! How's they get in that sack? Is it a big sack, or did they get shrunk?

"PROGNOSES NEGATIVE!!"

"Cry, Cry Again." You cry, and then you see her dance...and you cry again.

"Rochelle, Rochelle" A young girls' erotic journey from Milan to Minsk.

Then 10 years later I find out that "The English Patient" is a real movie and I have to read the book for English class.

Hoover Dam
Jun 17, 2003

red white and blue forever


DrBouvenstein posted:

If by later...you mean earlier.

I also loved how they eventually flashed back to Jerry meeting Kramer, and Jerry starting the whole "Kramer comes in and eats all his food thing" by inviting him over to share a pizza.


It also explains why Kramer is referred to as Kessler in the pilot.

Athanatos
Jun 7, 2006

Laser Rocket Arm


Chicolini posted:

"This is Frank Co-stanza. You think you could keep us out of Florida? We're moving in lock, stock and barrel. We're gonna be in the pool. We're gonna be in the clubhouse. We're gonna be all over that shuffleboard court! And I dare you to keep me out!" Then he just hangs up. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSHEt1dROZY

Jerry, it's Frank Costanza! Mr. Steinbrenner's here, George is dead, call me back!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_nCmj9IyLo


There is a list of Fake Seinfeld Movies here:
http://www.stanthecaddy.com/seinfel...es-discuss.html

the aftermath
Jul 20, 2002

Things Fall Apart

"Cheese, George, CHEESE!" The absolute glee on Jerry's face when he says that line cracks me up every time.

Haven't gotten around to buying the series on DVD yet, but I dvr the show every day.

Wotan
Aug 15, 2009

I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.


Oh poo poo. The finale is on TBS right now.

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 9, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.


Barnum posted:

Oh poo poo. The finale is on TBS right now.

To be fair to the gang, tons of the stuff they did that ruined so many lives was accidental.

ScentOfAnOtaku
Aug 25, 2006

I have no control, I just keep eating, and eating.


I'd say for all the movie stuff they've done, I love the re-enactment of JFK with Newman and Kramer. Mostly for Newman actually being in JFK, and Jerry doing the "Back, and to the left".

SoupyTwist
Feb 20, 2008


TMMadman posted:

The Chicken Roaster is still one of my favorite episodes. Jerry turning into Kramer is great.

edit - Here's the clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUvz...feature=related

This is from Curb, but it's still great. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PhgFvhc2iq0&NR=1

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 9, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.


Puddy's line in the finale is awesome.

"Puddy...don't wait for me"

"Alright"

Shatter Map
Nov 14, 2005



Waiter: Anything to drink? Some wine, perhaps?

Mickey: I like Merlot.

Karen: I love Merlot.

Julie: I'm crazy about Merlot.

Kramer: I LIVE for Merlot!!

Waiter: We're...out of Merlot.

MINT WIZARD
Apr 24, 2007

This isn't going to stop until Pictionary bans the word windmill.


One time I was riding in an elevator and a girl came in. Of course I had to say that I was the guy who made those crop circles in England. She had no idea what I was talking about and got off like three floors later. I did not get her number.

Another time I asked a girl at a Starbucks I had gone into a lot (just to see her) if she dated immature men. She said no.

Seinfeld lines do not work in real life, at least they haven't so far.

McSpanky
Jan 16, 2005







safety dan posted:

One time I was riding in an elevator and a girl came in. Of course I had to say that I was the guy who made those crop circles in England. She had no idea what I was talking about and got off like three floors later. I did not get her number.

Another time I asked a girl at a Starbucks I had gone into a lot (just to see her) if she dated immature men. She said no.

Seinfeld lines do not work in real life, at least they haven't so far.

"Hello, my name is George. I'm unemployed and live with my parents."



If only

Chexoid
Nov 5, 2009

Now that I have this dating robot I can take it easy.


Athanatos posted:

Jerry, it's Frank Costanza! Mr. Steinbrenner's here, George is dead, call me back!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_nCmj9IyLo

How could you trade Jay Buhner!? He had over 30 home runs last year, a hundred RBIs, he's got a rocket for an arm! You don't know what you're doing!

The Finn
Aug 27, 2004

Likes: Katanas, Corea, Entertainment Centre, Couch, Yellow, Bald, Power

idiot race's bald fail admin of the week winner 2013


safety dan posted:

One time I was riding in an elevator and a girl came in. Of course I had to say that I was the guy who made those crop circles in England. She had no idea what I was talking about and got off like three floors later. I did not get her number.

Another time I asked a girl at a Starbucks I had gone into a lot (just to see her) if she dated immature men. She said no.

Seinfeld lines do not work in real life, at least they haven't so far.

Have you tried reaching out and just sampling the fabric of her dress? It worked once in two attempts on the show.

Jingleheimer
Mar 30, 2006


Athanatos posted:

Jerry, it's Frank Costanza! Mr. Steinbrenner's here, George is dead, call me back!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t_nCmj9IyLo

I love how right after hearing the message he gets a call from George.

The Infamous Shane
Dec 18, 2007
Call me Shane Mcloon, Super Goon.

One that I've seen work, not from Seinfeld but from Curb is Larry's: "I'm not a cool guy, but I'd love to waste your time for a couple of hours"

MINT WIZARD
Apr 24, 2007

This isn't going to stop until Pictionary bans the word windmill.


Tiny Fistpump posted:

Have you tried reaching out and just sampling the fabric of her dress? It worked once in two attempts on the show.

Three attempts. Jake Jarmel, George, Newman. Only the first one succeeds, but maybe that's George and Newman's fault.

No, it's not. Nobody feel anyone's fabric unless you know them or are as cool as Jake Jarmel was in the 90s. (none of us are)

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 9, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.


One of my favorite episodes is on right now on my Fox affiliate.

JIMMY DOWN

haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.


College Slice

"Oh by the way I'm not getting married tell mom bye"

*rips phone cord out of wall*

Rusty Shackelford
Feb 7, 2005


After several viewings, I can confirm that the actor who won the audition for the role of Kramer on the show "Jerry" really did steal the raisins.

Your Proud Pal
Sep 4, 2006



DrBouvenstein posted:

I loved all the fake movies they came up with.

"Sack Lunch" Look at them! How's they get in that sack? Is it a big sack, or did they get shrunk?

"PROGNOSES NEGATIVE!!"

"Cry, Cry Again." You cry, and then you see her dance...and you cry again.

"Rochelle, Rochelle" A young girls' erotic journey from Milan to Minsk.

Because they also used real movies sometimes (The English Patient, Schindler's List, Plan 8 from outer space, Home Alone (the old man got to me too, George) Breakfast at Tiffany's, I sometimes would scour Blockbuster for a copy of Checkmate or Chunnel.

BlackJosh
Sep 25, 2007


Just popped in to say this show is pretty much the best show, ever.

And I'm glad the Marine biologist clip is in the OP because it's probably my favorite moment in the show.

That and anything involving Crazy Joe Divolla.

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 9, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.


Your Proud Pal posted:

Because they also used real movies sometimes (The English Patient, Schindler's List, Plan 8 from outer space, Home Alone (the old man got to me too, George) Breakfast at Tiffany's, I sometimes would scour Blockbuster for a copy of Checkmate or Chunnel.

I love the completely random cheery music playing when George watches Home Alone. The Public Domain rules.

WITNESS THE POWER!
Jun 13, 2009

Why don't you go get a glass of orange juice and spill it all over yourself like a big dumb baby



I just remembered one of my favorite moments.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY7kzdnpgJ4

I love how Jerry delivers the "salty discharge" line like he's some sort of confused robot who just discovered the concept of emotions.

Postmaster General
Mar 12, 2007

gger


Your Proud Pal posted:

Chunnel

EVERYBODY OUT OF THE CHUNNEL!!

The Infamous Shane
Dec 18, 2007
Call me Shane Mcloon, Super Goon.

Postmaster General posted:

EVERYBODY OUT OF THE CHUNNEL!!

"What is he doing in the chunnel?!"

DrBouvenstein
Feb 28, 2007

I think I'm a doctor, but that doesn't make me a doctor. This fancy avatar does.


safety dan posted:

Seinfeld lines do not work in real life, at least they haven't so far.

You might not know it to look at me, but I can run really, really fast.

Furnace
Mar 31, 2004

12 teams is where it's at, right? Yeah! Right? Yeah! Right? Yeah! Right? YEAH! SOME THINGS YOU CAN'T UNSEE, BRO!


Shimrra Jamaane posted:

JIMMY DOWN

This guy I used to hang out with did this when he got drunk, but while he was drinking, he was using his own name. While he was getting sick, Mike turned into Jimmy. I always wondered what happened to him.

Notsosubtle
Oct 30, 2008


WITNESS THE POWER! posted:

I just remembered one of my favorite moments.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY7kzdnpgJ4

I love how Jerry delivers the "salty discharge" line like he's some sort of confused robot who just discovered the concept of emotions.

From that same episode:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlZvY_LXJco

"Serenity now, insanity later." *crazy eyes*

Dan a man
Dec 27, 2004

If there's really so many people in the world, there had to be someone who wasn't ordinary, someone who was living an interesting life. But why wasn't I that ChuChu?

Shatter Map posted:

Waiter: Anything to drink? Some wine, perhaps?
Mickey: I like Merlot.
Karen: I love Merlot.
Julie: I'm crazy about Merlot.
Kramer: I LIVE for Merlot!!
Waiter: We're...out of Merlot.
You telling me that wine is better than Pepsi? Huh, no way wine is better than Pepsi.

Basilson
Sep 21, 2005

Yeah, right, buddy, liquor store robbery, officer down. Sure. And I'm Edward G. Robinson.

Your Proud Pal posted:

Because they also used real movies sometimes (The English Patient, Schindler's List, Plan 8 from outer space, Home Alone (the old man got to me too, George) Breakfast at Tiffany's, I sometimes would scour Blockbuster for a copy of Checkmate or Chunnel.

I a-love that-a Edward Scissorhands!

FuriousxGeorge
Aug 8, 2007

We've been the best team all year.

They're just finding out.


quote:

As Alexander explains in an interview for the Seinfeld DVD, during an early conversation with David, Alexander questioned a script, saying, "This could never happen to anyone, and even if it did, no human being would react like this." David replied, "What do you mean? This happened to me once, and this is exactly how I reacted!".

Do they ever specify what situation Alexander and David are talking about? Personally, I like to think it's the bit where George finds the eclair in the trash can and eats it.

It refers to when George quit his job, regretted it, and came in the next day like it never happened. Larry David actually did that when he worked for SNL. (And it worked out better than it did for George)

quote:

The episodes relates three parallel plots, in intertwining scenes. The first plot concerns George being banned from the executive toilet. Because of this he quits his job, but immediately regrets the decision. He discusses job opportunities with his friend Jerry, but is unable to think of an occupation that would suit him. Jerry suggests that George could try to go back to work and pretend he never quit. George takes this advice, but his former boss, Rick Levitan (Fred Applegate), refuses to let him stay and insults him. As revenge, George decides to slip a mickey into his drink during an office party, and enlists Elaine Benes to help him. At the party, Elaine distracts Levitan while George puts the mickey in his drink. When Levitan notices George, however, he decides he was unreasonable and tells George he can have his job back. George attempts to intercept the drink, but after Levitan welcomes him back during a toast sprinkled with insults at George's expense, George tells him to "drink up", which he does. In the following scene we see George once again brainstorming job opportunity ideas, the subtext being that his boss discovered the spiking of his drink, connected it to George, and has fired him once again.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Revenge_%28Seinfeld%29

FuriousxGeorge fucked around with this message at 06:07 on Apr 28, 2010

cat doter
Jul 27, 2006



gonna need more cheese...australia has a lot of crackers

Oh man, I just remembered an absolutely hilarious episode. The one where Jerry teaches that little kid the word gently caress. The way the kid delivers the "you fat gently caress!" line right at the end loving slays me.

kaworu
Jul 23, 2004



cat doter posted:

Oh man, I just remembered an absolutely hilarious episode. The one where Jerry teaches that little kid the word gently caress. The way the kid delivers the "you fat gently caress!" line right at the end loving slays me.

Seinfeld was really fantastic with this sort of thing, I mean getting away with some extremely risque and off-color material you could never do on network TV by simply implying all of it and never directly stating it outright. It could be with clever edits, like the bit you're talking about, or like in "The Contest" where I don't think the word masturbation was ever spoken aloud. Hell, barely even any direct euphemisms for it were used.

kaworu fucked around with this message at 06:44 on Apr 28, 2010

Evil Agita
Feb 25, 2005

Lord Fool, give me another chance. I'll prove my strength to you!

Das Ende posted:

Really, anything with Kruger was great....

Whatever.

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NumbersAndNoise
Jan 13, 2005

Nothing but numbers and noise.

Fufkin posted:

I am rewatching the Wire and Frank Sobotka kinda reminds me of George:



Soooo-bot-ka

That really doesn't work in text.

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