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Parachute
May 18, 2003


I just realized that on Facebook I have yet (since 2004) to change my "About Me" section and it still reads "My neck is one gargantuan monkey fist".

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emgeejay
Dec 8, 2007

and if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you

Jerusalem posted:

I'm disappointed that you're not just a couple of white people.

Well played.

penismightier
Dec 6, 2005

What the hell, I'll just eat some trash.



Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?



Max22 posted:

Well played.

Don't knock my IV line out

neoboman
Feb 16, 2007


Jerusalem posted:

Don't knock my IV line out

Well, I didn't believe you. Who's going to turn down a Junior Mint!

Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

everybody relax, i'm here


Nap Ghost

Hazel really puts your mother to shame.

Invis
Apr 26, 2010


Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go to fill my freezer with my own blood.

Ash1138
Sep 29, 2001

Get up, chief. We're just gettin' started.



Invis posted:

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go to fill my freezer with my own blood.
You've got three pints of Kramer in ya, buddy!

OnlyJuanMon
Jan 25, 2010


Too tired to chase fences right now.


"Listen to your heartbeat. Heybuddy. Heybuddy. Heybuddy."

Not An Irish Monk
May 1, 2009


So I'm watching JFK, and I just remembered how fantastic that whole "magic loogie" parody was. Kramer's sudden "I'M HIT" always gets me.

DrBouvenstein
Feb 28, 2007

I think I'm a doctor, but that doesn't make me a doctor. This fancy avatar does.


Ash1138 posted:

You've got three pints of Kramer in ya, buddy!

I can feel his blood inside me...borrowing things from my blood!

penismightier
Dec 6, 2005

What the hell, I'll just eat some trash.





Then who are the Dutch?

haljordan
Oct 22, 2004

the corpse of god is love.


College Slice

penismightier posted:



Then who are the Dutch?

I feel like an out of work porn star!

clockworx
Oct 15, 2005
The Internet Whore made me buy this account

I'm visiting New York and went around the corner to grab food from a Pakistani Tea House.

There were a few customers there.

Alfred P. Pseudonym
May 29, 2006

And when you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss goes 8-8



You are a good man! Very good man!

OnlyJuanMon
Jan 25, 2010


Too tired to chase fences right now.


I always though Jerry got a bum rap. How was it his fault the Visa ended up in the wrong mailbox? He was only trying to help.

jojoinnit
Dec 13, 2010

Strength and speed, that's why you're a special agent.


OnlyJuanMon posted:

I always though Jerry got a bum rap. How was it his fault the Visa ended up in the wrong mailbox? He was only trying to help.
Well if he had just gone to elaines to get his mail instead of waiting for her to bring it…

I love the finger wag on "bad man". Always gets me.

clockworx
Oct 15, 2005
The Internet Whore made me buy this account

You know, I never do this. But the shrimp? It's just that it's a little stringy.

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003


Sexy Beasts is a new dating show where real-life singles sport elaborate makeup and prosthetics to put true blind-date chemistry to the test.



clockworx posted:

You know, I never do this. But the shrimp? It's just that it's a little stringy.

Suddenly you're a shellfish connoisseur?

syscall girl
Nov 6, 2009

by FactsAreUseless


Fun Shoe

I don't like this thing, and here's what I'm doing with it!

Ash1138
Sep 29, 2001

Get up, chief. We're just gettin' started.



haljordan posted:

I feel like an out of work porn star!
I'm not an orgy guy!

Evil Agita
Feb 25, 2005

Lord Fool, give me another chance. I'll prove my strength to you!

I always thought the closing joke of Newman making the millenium party date the wrong year was kinda weak. Of course the person who booked the party knew what year Newman wanted to have his party!

Alfred P. Pseudonym
May 29, 2006

And when you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss goes 8-8



Evil Agita posted:

I always thought the closing joke of Newman making the millenium party date the wrong year was kinda weak. Of course the person who booked the party knew what year Newman wanted to have his party!

Yeah but it's worth it for that noise he makes, which might be the best 0.2 seconds of the show.

stratdax
Sep 14, 2006


Alfred P. Pseudonym posted:

Yeah but it's worth it for that noise he makes, which might be the best 0.2 seconds of the show.

What took you so long?

WouldDesk
Dec 26, 2009


All right, I'll give you half an hour...

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!


WouldDesk posted:

All right, I'll give you half an hour...

Fake.

BrandNew
May 16, 2007

Get me my BLUE WINDBREAKER!

You emit a foul and unpleasant odor.

Rusty Shackelford
Feb 7, 2005


I loathe you.

AbstractNapper
Jun 5, 2011

I can help

Jackie's cashing in on your wretched disfigurement.

mojo1701a
Oct 8, 2008

Oh, yeah. Loud and clear. Emphasis on LOUD!
~ David Lee Roth



AbstractNapper posted:

Jackie's cashing in on your wretched disfigurement.

Your face is my case.

BrandNew
May 16, 2007

Get me my BLUE WINDBREAKER!

AbstractNapper posted:

Jackie's cashing in on your wretched disfigurement.

Who told you to put the balm on? I didnt tell you to put the balm on. Why did you put the balm on?

Loving Life Partner
Apr 17, 2003


By the way... they're real, and they're faaaantastic

mojo1701a
Oct 8, 2008

Oh, yeah. Loud and clear. Emphasis on LOUD!
~ David Lee Roth



Loving Life Partner posted:

By the way... they're real, and they're faaaantastic spectacular!

Leovinus
Apr 28, 2005

by Y Kant Ozma Post


haljordan posted:

I feel like an out of work porn star!

Oh, yeah... Buck Naked.

jojoinnit
Dec 13, 2010

Strength and speed, that's why you're a special agent.


Leovinus posted:

Oh, yeah... Buck Nekkid.

LordFancy
Feb 26, 2010


You know the message you're sending out to the world with those sweatpants? You're telling the world "I give up. I can't compete in normal society. I'm miserable, so I might as well be comfortable."

LordFancy fucked around with this message at 08:47 on Jul 3, 2011

Mickolution
Oct 1, 2005

Ballers...I put numbers on the boards

Like the other day, I went to the bank to make a deposit and the teller, she gives me this look...

Alhazred
Feb 16, 2011






LordFancy posted:

You know the message you're sending out to the world with those sweatpants? You're telling the world "I give up. I can't compete in normal society. I'm miserable, so I might as well be comfortable."

I would drape myself in velvet if it were socially acceptable.

Gyshall
Feb 24, 2009

Had a couple of drinks.
Saw a couple of things.


That Edward Scissor Hands - he makea' me cry!

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Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

everybody relax, i'm here


Nap Ghost

WHADDYA GONNA DO ON DA TOILET!?

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