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Eye of Widesauron
Mar 29, 2014



I adored the Klobb back in Goldeneye days. We called it the "meat patty gun" because it sounded like dropping piles of hamburger patties on the ground when you fired it and wasn't cheap as poo poo like the RCP-90; even though many people derided the Klobb as useless in the schoolyard it found a place in my heart during Goldeneye sleepover pizza parties way back when. For me, it was all about Jaws and Klobbs. Oddjob was for faggots.



What are some of the more useless items and weapons that you found yourself using despite their badness in games?

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MarioTeachesWiping
Nov 1, 2006

by XyloJW


The ruler in earthbound

Mr.Unique-Name
Jul 5, 2002



The needler

When you meleed with it it should have such all the shots loaded into the guy so they exploded

Flynn Taggart
Jun 14, 2006



Bubble gun in Earthworm Jim 2

Doctor Goat
Jan 21, 2005

Where does it hurt?


the translocator in CTF in the original unreal tournament

it was useless for any situation in which you were carrying the flag but i'll be damned if i couldn't snipe with that thing like a boss

Macksy
Oct 20, 2008


the klobb owned because you could say "it's klobberin' time" whenever you picked it up

Shifty gimbal
Dec 28, 2008

Hey you... I got something to tell ya

Biscuit Hider

Pretty recent but it's legit good poo poo

Lt. Dans Legs
Jul 3, 2008


Gimbal lock posted:

Pretty recent but it's legit good poo poo



its not useless, as shovel knight doing little flips midair while you stomp baddies makes you feel like a total badass

Doctor Goat
Jan 21, 2005

Where does it hurt?


the klobb was the best gun in one hit kill mode

Eye of Widesauron
Mar 29, 2014



While playing through Planescape: Torment I often forgot to toss seemingly useless items since I was one of those people who tried to carry everything. This paid off a few times when portals would open from what seemed to be a useless item actually being a portal key!

I wish more games today would do stuff like that.

01011001
Dec 26, 2012



i have used the L85A1/L85A2/IL 86 in nearly every stalker game/mod ive played even though in most of them its obsoleted by 2 or more guns. dont know what it is about it but i like it

Eye of Widesauron
Mar 29, 2014



01011001 posted:

i have used the L85A1/L85A2/IL 86 in nearly every stalker game/mod ive played even though in most of them its obsoleted by 2 or more guns. dont know what it is about it but i like it

I loved that thing in Fallout 2 as the LSW and preferred it to the BOZAR for no reason other than I hate save scumming and it just looks cooler.

Sid Vicious
Jan 1, 1970



its not really useless so much as just a pallet swap weapon, but the rainbow making GBS threads unicorn in red faction armageddon or whatever it was that had it, because it owned

Action Tortoise
Feb 18, 2012

A wolf howls.
I know how he feels.


I was playing Battlefield 3 for the first time at someone's house and spent the session trying to kill everyone with paddles.

Eye of Widesauron
Mar 29, 2014



Action Tortoise posted:

I was playing Battlefield 3 for the first time at someone's house and spent the session trying to kill everyone with paddles.

I have more EOD bot kills than any other vehicle kills in the BF4 account I played on

Paddles are pretty rage inducing

Seth Rollins
Oct 24, 2001

i'll always take care of you


Muldoon

we called the klobb the pencil gun because we assumed it shot pencils instead of bullets

JIZZ DENOUEMENT
Oct 3, 2012

STRIKE!


My dick in the game of life

bara godzilla
Jul 27, 2010



The Protagonist
Jun 29, 2009

The average is 5.5? I thought it was 4. This is very unsettling.


Canned Bread
Feb 26, 2013

Best Thing Since Sliced!


the Jag in team fortress 2. in fact I collect them and proudly display them in my item showcase for all to enjoy.

Ragg
Apr 27, 2003

<The Honorable Badgers>

Hard core min maxer here OP. Won't use a weapon unless I can scientifically prove that it's the optimal tool for situation at hand.

bara godzilla
Jul 27, 2010



Canned Bread posted:

the Jag in team fortress 2. in fact I collect them and proudly display them in my item showcase for all to enjoy.



if you're not using the gunslinger then the jag is the best wrench option hth

Crewmine
Apr 26, 2012


I dunno if it counts as a weapon but I loved having the sheep as my avatar creature in Black and White

nothing more satisfying than getting a sheep hench as gently caress then kicking the poo poo out of a wolf

Canned Bread
Feb 26, 2013

Best Thing Since Sliced!


DLTN posted:

if you're not using the gunslinger then the jag is the best wrench option hth

yeah but that's just a secret between you and me, k?

Soral
May 30, 2009



i have made more than one effort post in the past about how the jag in tf2 is actually completely worthless but i respect your opinion and support your endeavors

bara godzilla
Jul 27, 2010



i could make a case for the jag but honestly tf2 is too poo poo of a game for anyone to care about this line of discussion tbh

Meat Recital
Mar 26, 2009

by zen death robot


one day ill find the gasoline for the chainsaw and show that tentacle whos boss

nrook
Jun 25, 2009

Just let yourself become a worthless person!

that fuckin fake item block

totally useless, obvious as poo poo, but I'll be damned if I didn't think I was the cleverest man in the universe when I put that thing amidst a forest of real item blocks

BoredDG
Aug 10, 2013




Any game where you can use your fists as a weapon. Even though its typically the weakest "weapon", it's amusing that you can kill things with your bare hands.

SunAndSpring
Dec 4, 2013




No magicka
No damage
Final Destination

Space Hamlet
Aug 24, 2009

not listening
not listening


Mewtwo

DrManiac
Feb 29, 2012



The loving baby in balder's gate two just because of how loving stupid it was. The familiar is also dumb but it's kinda cool and gave you a tiny benefit so w/e

Grakdesh
Jul 21, 2005

High-functioning otaku.


What did having a baby do for you?

Ragg
Apr 27, 2003

<The Honorable Badgers>

Grakdesh posted:

What did having a baby do for you?

You got a baby inventory item that you could carry around.

Pirate Jet
May 2, 2010


DLTN posted:

if you're not using the gunslinger then the jag is the best wrench option hth

someone did the math and figured out that it only saves like .2 seconds to build a sentry with it compared to the regular wrench

Action Tortoise
Feb 18, 2012

A wolf howls.
I know how he feels.


The wrench that does bleed damage is more useful than the Jag?

Get a Medic to follow you as a Heavy and when he ubers just use fists or bang taunt everyone.

bara godzilla
Jul 27, 2010



Pirate Jet posted:

someone did the math and figured out that it only saves like .2 seconds to build a sentry with it compared to the regular wrench

the point is that despite .2s being only a marginal difference, it's better to have than a little extra damage on a melee weapon that you should only be using to manage your buildings

Seth Rollins
Oct 24, 2001

i'll always take care of you


Muldoon

i like to play as pyro in tf2 sometimes

AHungryRobot
Oct 12, 2012


Euclid's C-Finder in new vegas

having your own satellite nuke is pretty sweet no matter how impractical it may be

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Mr. Pumroy
May 20, 2001



i don't care if it was dumb i still liked the biogun in unreal tournament. you would basically have to be blind to be killed by it but i thought it was the funniest thing to cover the floor in slime and if someone ran into it they'd do a lil hop when they got hurt and that was all good

also i would fire the redeemer but instead of aiming it at people i would fly loops for as long as i could

Mr. Pumroy fucked around with this message at 11:25 on Jul 1, 2014

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