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Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer

RareAcumen posted:

Hey, man whatever you wanna feel about Guy Fieri, that's your preoperative. I just think saying that people have to dress a certain way because of age is stupid. Criticize his appearance as much as you like.

Well you can always make fun of him for being a homophobic (as in literally scared of gays) pervert instead http://gawker.com/5850521/guy-fieri...-disliking-gays

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RareAcumen
Dec 28, 2012






Aesop Poprock posted:

Well you can always make fun of him for being a homophobic (as in literally scared of gays) pervert instead http://gawker.com/5850521/guy-fieri...-disliking-gays

I knew nothing of Guy Fieri aside from 'was on Food Network' and now flames of hatred burn in my eye sockets.

AnonSpore
Jan 19, 2012

Bear Witness

You should watch this too (it also qualifies as afp!)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTALYm62hWo

cash crab
Apr 4, 2015

all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology





RareAcumen posted:

It gets even more bewildering



???? why do I leave

Picnic Princess
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die




AnonSpore posted:

You should watch this too (it also qualifies as afp!)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTALYm62hWo

The most anti-porn of them all


I love Cul De Sac

Picnic Princess has a new favorite as of 06:24 on Sep 18, 2015

PCOS Bill
May 12, 2013

by FactsAreUseless


I think Guy Fieri is cool

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer

PCOS Bill posted:

I think Guy Fieri is cool

A few months back I was on acid with a friend and there was a Guy Fieri marathon on TV that we couldn't figure out how to turn off and watching him cram oozing food into his face was one of the worst trip moments possible

PCOS Bill
May 12, 2013

by FactsAreUseless


Aesop Poprock posted:

A few months back I was on acid with a friend and there was a Guy Fieri marathon on TV that we couldn't figure out how to turn off and watching him cram oozing food into his face was one of the worst trip moments possible

Don't do drugs.

Such Fun
May 6, 2013
 

PCOS Bill posted:

I think Guy Fieri is cool

His recipes do often honour your ancestral cuisine.

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves



And because of that one million dick-headed fanatic Dr Who... fan's are actually doing that claiming it's good.

Bina
Dec 28, 2011

Love Deluxe


AnonSpore posted:

You should watch this too (it also qualifies as afp!)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hTALYm62hWo

RareAcumen
Dec 28, 2012






This counts as anti-food porn too right?

http://i.imgur.com/EzkCitv.gifv

PubicMice
Feb 14, 2012

looking for information on posts

A goon's nightmare:

Samizdata
May 14, 2007


PubicMice posted:

A goon's nightmare:


Do you see any loose corn? Well, DO YOU??

PubicMice
Feb 14, 2012

looking for information on posts

Samizdata posted:

Do you see any loose corn? Well, DO YOU??

Like this?


notedit: Or maybe this?

Bina
Dec 28, 2011

Love Deluxe


PubicMice posted:

A goon's nightmare:


Would.

RareAcumen
Dec 28, 2012






PubicMice posted:

A goon's nightmare:


You're being really obtuse about this and its very rude.

Something breaded and crunchy probably shouldn't be put in a bowl of sauces or soup because it turns into mush like that Famous Bowl trip report showed.

An example of things that maybe shouldn't go together ham and watermelon, spaghetti and mac&cheese, ribs ands guacamole, black olives and food

And speaking of which

bunnyofdoom posted:

KFC trip report

ACES, you missed a trip report.

RareAcumen has a new favorite as of 09:40 on Sep 18, 2015

Such Fun
May 6, 2013
 

RareAcumen posted:

Something breaded and crunchy probably shouldn't be put in a bowl of sauces or soup

Zanael
Jan 30, 2007

Finn 3:16 says I just licorice
whipped your peppermint ass


RareAcumen posted:

black olives and food
Try having a fougasse one day, it's a mediterranean bread full of olives, it's awesome.

RareAcumen
Dec 28, 2012







Shocked you didn't go for the easy pick and post a picture of a bowl of cereal.

theres a will theres moe
Jan 10, 2007




Hair Elf

PubicMice posted:

notedit: Or maybe this?


This is clearly fixed corn, not loose corn.

Robot Mil
Apr 13, 2011



Gridlocked posted:

And because of that one million dick-headed fanatic Dr Who... fan's are actually doing that claiming it's good.

Except it wasn't actually fishfingers, it was cake made to look like fishfingers. People are stupid.

For content, I don't even know what that green sludge is:

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves


Robot Mil posted:

Except it wasn't actually fishfingers, it was cake made to look like fishfingers. People are stupid.

For content, I don't even know what that green sludge is:


Yes but they don't know this or care. They just do it and say it's good cause loldrwho

-CHA
Jun 20, 2004

State-of-the-art
home video technology

Robot Mil posted:


For content, I don't even know what that green sludge is:


It looks like some sort of curry. But thats only hopeful thinking to try and bring reason to the few grains of rice sitting at the top edge of the plate.

Possibly a picture of their second helping where they decided to change out the rice for fries. Or a new low where this was their first helping and it was served on a dirty plate.

Horrible Smutbeast
Sep 2, 2011


TRIP REPORT!



My boss sent me a novelty care package full of things like eucalyptus leaf cough drops and glitter. The most important thing of the package was this abomination I made my friends and I eat in a sports bar late last night.



It claims to be 70% milk chocolate, 25% caramel and 5% vegemite. Apparently 5% vegemite is enough to make my body induce purging less than an hour after consuming it (more on that later). The bar itself looks like a normal Cadbury chocolate bar except for the sticky sludge that leaked out on one end. The stuff oozing out smelt, looked and had the consistency of what you would find in a newborn's diaper.



I won't post the pictures of myself and my friends tasting, but this is a good approximation of it.



We all sat there in silence trying to figure out what it tasted like the most. One girl said it tasted like the powdered cheese packet from a kraft dinner box mixed with chocolate. The guy said it tasted like the aftertaste you get in your throat after vomiting. He also claimed it coated his back teeth so every time he went to instinctively lick his teeth clean he visibly cringed at us. He ended up chugging two glasses of water to try to get rid of it. To me, it tasted like someone had rubbed some dirty pennies and beef bullion against a chocolate bar and packaged it. I honestly thought I might have cut my tongue open on a tooth and was tasting blood instead of vegemite (spoilers, it was all vegemite).

We even offered the middle aged waiter with dyed grey mohawk some. We warned him it was vegemite but he waved us off saying "It can't be that bad." After shoving 3 pieces in his mouth at once he dropped the rest on the table and told us to get the gently caress out. He brought us our bill right after so I don't think he was joking about it.

I managed to get home, poo poo until I was pissing blood out my rear end for a few hours and then promptly went to sleep when my body gave out. My leg cramped half way through the night but it always does that anyway. It was only when I woke up this morning and realized that vegemite is made up of gluten and brewers yeast...which I am allergic to. Mystery solved.

WOULD NOT RECOMMEND.

Paladinus
Jan 11, 2014

Of course, it doesn't make sense to pay more, so you can just by two cat harnesses and use one of them for sex.



bony tony
Aug 9, 2013



Horrible Smutbeast posted:

pissing blood out my rear end

Thank you.

PCOS Bill
May 12, 2013

by FactsAreUseless


Such Fun posted:

His recipes do often honour your ancestral cuisine.

It's just food man

Waci
May 30, 2011

Let me axe you just one question.

RareAcumen posted:

An example of things that maybe shouldn't go together

You and posting?

Horrible Smutbeast
Sep 2, 2011



I'm not a very creative or good writer, so it was the best I could do. I hope it got the point across.

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

Come play my CYOA!

Save your reality from the Constructors... then save all the rest of them.



This looks delicious

Sodium Chloride
Dec 31, 2007



The Vegemite chocolate looks bad.

There was a Marmite chocolate bar that was just 2% Marmite, 98% choc and no caramel in it. I gave one to my secret santa and he probably died from it.

bony tony
Aug 9, 2013



Brawnfire posted:

This looks delicious

The beer in a mason jar really sells it.

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

by zen death robot



Would

Gridlocked
Aug 2, 2014

MR. STUPID MORON
WITH AN UGLY FACE
AND A BIG BUTT
AND HIS BUTT SMELLS
AND HE LIKES TO KISS
HIS OWN BUTT
by Roger Hargreaves


Horrible Smutbeast posted:

TRIP REPORT!



My boss sent me a novelty care package full of things like eucalyptus leaf cough drops and glitter. The most important thing of the package was this abomination I made my friends and I eat in a sports bar late last night.



It claims to be 70% milk chocolate, 25% caramel and 5% vegemite. Apparently 5% vegemite is enough to make my body induce purging less than an hour after consuming it (more on that later). The bar itself looks like a normal Cadbury chocolate bar except for the sticky sludge that leaked out on one end. The stuff oozing out smelt, looked and had the consistency of what you would find in a newborn's diaper.



I won't post the pictures of myself and my friends tasting, but this is a good approximation of it.



We all sat there in silence trying to figure out what it tasted like the most. One girl said it tasted like the powdered cheese packet from a kraft dinner box mixed with chocolate. The guy said it tasted like the aftertaste you get in your throat after vomiting. He also claimed it coated his back teeth so every time he went to instinctively lick his teeth clean he visibly cringed at us. He ended up chugging two glasses of water to try to get rid of it. To me, it tasted like someone had rubbed some dirty pennies and beef bullion against a chocolate bar and packaged it. I honestly thought I might have cut my tongue open on a tooth and was tasting blood instead of vegemite (spoilers, it was all vegemite).

We even offered the middle aged waiter with dyed grey mohawk some. We warned him it was vegemite but he waved us off saying "It can't be that bad." After shoving 3 pieces in his mouth at once he dropped the rest on the table and told us to get the gently caress out. He brought us our bill right after so I don't think he was joking about it.

I managed to get home, poo poo until I was pissing blood out my rear end for a few hours and then promptly went to sleep when my body gave out. My leg cramped half way through the night but it always does that anyway. It was only when I woke up this morning and realized that vegemite is made up of gluten and brewers yeast...which I am allergic to. Mystery solved.

WOULD NOT RECOMMEND.

I smother my toast in Vegemite like any good Australian. That is a pitiful amount in that chocolate. 3/10 wouldn't waste money when I could buy a jar and some bread and have breakfast (and lunch, and sometimes tea cause gently caress yeah Vegemite on toast) for a week.

Hirayuki
Mar 28, 2010



College Slice

Gridlocked posted:

I smother my toast in Vegemite like any good Australian. That is a pitiful amount in that chocolate. 3/10 wouldn't waste money when I could buy a jar and some bread and have breakfast (and lunch, and sometimes tea cause gently caress yeah Vegemite on toast) for a week.
Now try smothering a bar of Cadbury Dairy Milk in Vegemite.

cash crab
Apr 4, 2015

all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology



Horrible Smutbeast posted:

TRIP REPORT!



My boss sent me a novelty care package full of things like eucalyptus leaf cough drops and glitter. The most important thing of the package was this abomination I made my friends and I eat in a sports bar late last night.



It claims to be 70% milk chocolate, 25% caramel and 5% vegemite. Apparently 5% vegemite is enough to make my body induce purging less than an hour after consuming it (more on that later). The bar itself looks like a normal Cadbury chocolate bar except for the sticky sludge that leaked out on one end. The stuff oozing out smelt, looked and had the consistency of what you would find in a newborn's diaper.



I won't post the pictures of myself and my friends tasting, but this is a good approximation of it.



We all sat there in silence trying to figure out what it tasted like the most. One girl said it tasted like the powdered cheese packet from a kraft dinner box mixed with chocolate. The guy said it tasted like the aftertaste you get in your throat after vomiting. He also claimed it coated his back teeth so every time he went to instinctively lick his teeth clean he visibly cringed at us. He ended up chugging two glasses of water to try to get rid of it. To me, it tasted like someone had rubbed some dirty pennies and beef bullion against a chocolate bar and packaged it. I honestly thought I might have cut my tongue open on a tooth and was tasting blood instead of vegemite (spoilers, it was all vegemite).

We even offered the middle aged waiter with dyed grey mohawk some. We warned him it was vegemite but he waved us off saying "It can't be that bad." After shoving 3 pieces in his mouth at once he dropped the rest on the table and told us to get the gently caress out. He brought us our bill right after so I don't think he was joking about it.

I managed to get home, poo poo until I was pissing blood out my rear end for a few hours and then promptly went to sleep when my body gave out. My leg cramped half way through the night but it always does that anyway. It was only when I woke up this morning and realized that vegemite is made up of gluten and brewers yeast...which I am allergic to. Mystery solved.

WOULD NOT RECOMMEND.

Awful!

atholbrose
Feb 28, 2001

Splish!



I may be a page or two late, but the thread reminded me of it, so on the off chance someone here hasn't seen it, you should check out Yelping with Cormac.

Cormac McCarthy posted:

Chipotle Mexican Grill
SOMA - San Francisco, CA
Cormac M. | Author | Lost in the chaparral, NM

Three stars.

See that false burrito. See it swaddled in tinfoil on the desk in the bowels of that great tower, a bundle of meat and sauce in a place long ago ceded to silicone and copper. The stooped man eating that peasant food as if in consuming it he can escape to a farmfield in a verdant valley and look down and see blood running from his blisters and say, yes this is work. This is work. Instead his hands are clawlike and ruined by the keyboard and the mouse for he is a thing of bone and sinew in a sprawling contraption electric and of manís creation but not of man at all. And were he to saw his breast open with that plastic knife and soak the carpet black with his hot blood and were he to look ceilingward like some stigmatic enraptured and with the bellows of his lungs let forth a soaring wail in that subbasement his screams would be swallowed by the acoustic panels and repulsed by the good steel door as if he had made no sound and spilled no blood at all.

Haverchuck
May 6, 2005

the coolest


all this needs is a loaded revolver and a little sticky grocery list notepad for my suicide note

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VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

by zen death robot


Haverchuck posted:

all this needs is a loaded revolver and a little sticky grocery list notepad for my suicide note

"I died happy"

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