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Minimalist Program
Aug 13, 2010


Xlorp posted:

In the spirit of scientific inquiry, exactly who could you gently caress if you were alone on desert island? The essence of that situational trope is the absence of companionship.

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Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014



Ramrod XTreme

mycella lannister wanted to gently caress jamie lannister, her father, but was killed by poison

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007


IllCamino posted:

darwin and einstein were cuzin fukkkers. seems like the smart thing to do.

As long as you're loving a reasonably distant cousin, you're alright for quite a few generations. Also, if you didn't grow up with them around then it's likely that you and your cousin would find each other desirable. Genetics or some poo poo.

Egoist
Aug 18, 2010

Love myself today
Let you go today


Lipstick Apathy

Top City Homo posted:

mycella lannister wanted to gently caress jamie lannister, her father, but was killed by poison



Jim bob lannister

I Shot The Serif
Jul 19, 2007

NEVER play "Lady of Spain" AGAIN!






Pvt.Scott posted:

As long as you're loving a reasonably distant cousin, you're alright for quite a few generations. Also, if you didn't grow up with them around then it's likely that you and your cousin would find each other desirable. Genetics or some poo poo.

Someone shoulda told Thomas Hardy that.

Uncle Wemus
Mar 4, 2004


Jimmy Jim Jim Bobadoo

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Don't be so gloomy. After all it's not that awful. Like the fella says, in Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance.






Smellrose

Jim Bob

I would blow Dane Cook
Dec 26, 2008


Jim Bob

Fiend
Dec 2, 2001


J'Bob

Windows 98
Nov 13, 2005

by Reene


Jim Jorb

Twinty Zuleps
May 10, 2008

by R. Guyovich


Lipstick Apathy

Pvt.Scott posted:

As long as you're loving a reasonably distant cousin, you're alright for quite a few generations. Also, if you didn't grow up with them around then it's likely that you and your cousin would find each other desirable. Genetics or some poo poo.

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Don't be so gloomy. After all it's not that awful. Like the fella says, in Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance.






Smellrose

the gently caress is a second cousin?

Xlorp
Jan 23, 2008




ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:

the gently caress is a second cousin?
Exactly

XMNN
Apr 26, 2008



your (first) cousins kids

Lord of Pie
Mar 2, 2007




ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:

the gently caress is a second cousin?

Dangerously close to not being fuckable at all by Hapsburg criteria

Mnemosyne
Jun 11, 2002

There's no safe way to put a cat in a paper bag!!


Those aren't "reasonably distant" cousin relationships. Uncle-niece marriages are majorly hosed up, because an uncle and niece share, on average, 25% of their DNA. That's the same amount you share with a grandparent or a half-sibling. Marrying your uncle is the same as marrying your half-brother.

Mnemosyne
Jun 11, 2002

There's no safe way to put a cat in a paper bag!!

Mnemosyne posted:

Those aren't "reasonably distant" cousin relationships. Uncle-niece marriages are majorly hosed up, because an uncle and niece share, on average, 25% of their DNA. That's the same amount you share with a grandparent or a half-sibling. Marrying your uncle is the same as marrying your half-brother.

ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:

the gently caress is a second cousin?

A first cousin is when your parents are siblings. A second cousin is when your grandparents were siblings. So think about your grandma. Her brother is your great-uncle. His kids are your first-cousins-once-removed. His grandkids are your second cousins.

Look at me, all serious posting in this thread. Jim Bob.

EDIT: poo poo, quote is not edit.

Code Jockey
Jan 24, 2006

you can call
but I seldom answer after all






This will never not be hilarious I mean loving look at that

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006

Was ist das problem fraulein?


A few years ago when myspace was a thing I ran into a distant cousin who still shared my last name. She was searching for distant relatives and after consulting my grandfather she was indeed the grand daughter of a great aunt. The hosed up thing was she still had the same loving facial features of everyone in my immediate family.

So going with that experience, I think if you can trace your lineage to a living common ancestor you should NOT try gently caress them, imo.

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Don't be so gloomy. After all it's not that awful. Like the fella says, in Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance.






Smellrose

Code Jockey posted:

This will never not be hilarious I mean loving look at that

It's either less or more funny when you realize that a couple of eighteenth century world wars happened because of this.

The Fattest PI
Mar 4, 2008
VAGINA AVOIDER; LEADER OF THE BIBLE STUDY GROUP; WETTEST BLANKET


hemophilia posted:

A few years ago when myspace was a thing I ran into a distant cousin who still shared my last name. She was searching for distant relatives and after consulting my grandfather she was indeed the grand daughter of a great aunt. The hosed up thing was she still had the same loving facial features of everyone in my immediate family.

So going with that experience, I think if you can trace your lineage to a living common ancestor you should NOT try gently caress them, imo.

Are you saying you hosed her

Riot Bimbo
Dec 28, 2006

Was ist das problem fraulein?


The Fattest PI posted:

Are you saying you hosed her

like, the opposite. Blood runs really deep, i don't understand any degree of cousin loving.

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014



Ramrod XTreme

ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:

the gently caress is a second cousin?

Good to go

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007


Man, now that people don't seem to be falling all over themselves to defend the actions of an incestuous pedophile rapist and the actions of his family that lead to him evading legal punishment, I can't seem to build up any sort of righteous anger any longer.All I've got is more of an intellectual disapproval now.

Is Duggargate over?

you irl
Jan 22, 2014


duggargate is old news friend, now it's all about goons deciding where exactly is the line between incest and a fun time with a familiar face

you irl
Jan 22, 2014


fyi the line is second cousin, or first cousin if she's freaky

Say Nothing
Mar 4, 2013

by FactsAreUseless


Lord of Pie posted:

Dangerously close to not being fuckable at all by Hapsburg criteria

Well, If you don't mind your kid having a chin like an elbow.

I would blow Dane Cook
Dec 26, 2008


Josh is back on twitter, wishing his son a happy 4th birthday #tooold

Lord of Pie
Mar 2, 2007





This is what you get with that level of cousin fuckin'

jim bob
\


quote:

The physician who practiced his autopsy stated that his body "did not contain a single drop of blood; his heart was the size of a peppercorn; his lungs corroded; his intestines rotten and gangrenous; he had a single testicle, black as coal, and his head was full of water."

American historians Will and Ariel Durant described Charles II as "short, lame, epileptic, senile, and completely bald before 35, he was always on the verge of death, but repeatedly baffled Christendom by continuing to live."

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014



Ramrod XTreme

Lord of Pie posted:

This is what you get with that level of cousin fuckin'

jim bob
\


sounds like josh

Lord of Pie
Mar 2, 2007




Yeah that "bald by 35" thing makes me thing the Duggars have been Hapsburgin' it up for a while because even the young kids have receding hairlines.

hungry for crepes n shit
Aug 17, 2005




Jimpity Bobdah, Jimpity Ay

Toadvine
Mar 16, 2009
Please disregard my advice w/r/t history.

Hilarious bloodlines aside, I'd take the medical opinion of a physician from the year 1700 with a grain of salt.

Xelkelvos
Dec 19, 2012
Probation
Can't post for 25 days!


Toadvine posted:

Hilarious bloodlines aside, I'd take the medical opinion of a physician from the year 1700 with a grain of salt.

Hell, I'd take the opinion of a physician from the year 2000 with a little bit of salt without a second opinion.

The North Tower
Aug 20, 2007

You should throw it in the ocean.

"repeatedly baffled Christendom by continuing to live"

I want this on my tombstone.

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

RowboatMan: Freezing time is an old P.I. trick...


Jime Boob

Fiend
Dec 2, 2001


Aunt Jimima Bob Bedaya Doo De Roo

BrigadierSensible
Feb 16, 2012

Don't get my name wrong,
If you want to touch me there.

How come only the boys get hyphenated names like Jim-Bob?

Where are the Betty-Sues? The Jamie-Lynns? (that last one even starts with a J, so it's suitable for Michelle "eyes as crazy as my vagina is distended" Duggar

PT6A
Jan 5, 2006
THE VOLKSWAGEN DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON

BrigadierSensible posted:

How come only the boys get hyphenated names like Jim-Bob?

Where are the Betty-Sues? The Jamie-Lynns? (that last one even starts with a J, so it's suitable for Michelle "eyes as crazy as my vagina is distended" Duggar

According to wikipedia, there's Joy-Anna and Jordyn-Grace.

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Clochette
Aug 12, 2013



PT6A posted:

According to wikipedia, there's Joy-Anna and Jordyn-Grace.

That's even worse!

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