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Fiend
Dec 2, 2001


Oh look Steven crowder showed up.

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Crab Dad
Dec 28, 2002

I ate too much crab and transformed into this.




No. 6 posted:

LOL. I managed to have sex with my wife before marriage, get drunk at my wedding, gently caress her the night of, and still make it to breakfast the next morning. I remember it all and that guy is a little bitch.

Dude we all had sex with your wife that night. You'd recall if you wasn't drunk.

Amarcarts
Feb 21, 2007

This looks a lot like suffering.


"Be the Jim you want to see in the Bob" -Ghandi

Bonzo
Mar 11, 2004

Just like Mama used to make it!


Pvt.Scott posted:

It's going to be great to see how his relationship goes after the huge buildup and the novelty of boning starts wearing off. With luck he actually did marry someone good for him, which from that article sounds like she would be an intolerable oval office, if true.

I imagine she pretty much assumes the starfish position because anything else would indicate she's a whore.

max4me
Jun 15, 2003

by FactsAreUseless


Bonzo posted:

I imagine she pretty much assumes the starfish position because anything else would indicate she's a whore.

Psst starfish are asexual...dumbass god made them that way

I AM GRANDO
Aug 20, 2006



That guy probably does a lot of angry, tense whispering about everyone and everything he sees that he then repeats to his wife over dinner, where the only thing she ever says is, "how was your day, dear?"

She already knows the answer.

Anthony Rapp
Mar 29, 2004
Blame it on Cain, don't blame it on me.

Grimey Drawer

I hope that guy comes back from his honeymoon and finds out his wife gave him gonorrhea.

The Bible
May 8, 2010



XMNN posted:

seriously without the religious shame factor their divorce rate would be through the roof as it is im sure theres just a lot of unhappy marriages

The religious shame factor hasn't done all that much to lower the divorce rate of Christians. It is pretty much equal with non-believers.

jenny jones fan
Dec 24, 2007


I just want to point out that this poster is nostradomus

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3737331&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=3#post449167600

cumshitter
Sep 27, 2005

by Fluffdaddy



Good thing they waited so their first kiss could be super awkward and in full view of their entire families.

Code Jockey
Jan 24, 2006

69420 basic bytes free


No. 6 posted:

LOL. I managed to have sex with my wife before marriage, get drunk at my wedding, gently caress her the night of, and still make it to breakfast the next morning. I remember it all and that guy is a little bitch.

you're going to hell fyi

XMNN
Apr 26, 2008
I am incredibly stupid


The Bible posted:

The religious shame factor hasn't done all that much to lower the divorce rate of Christians. It is pretty much equal with non-believers.
imagine what it would look like without it

nah i bet just as many normal people rush into ill fated marriages but at least they dont pretend theyre doing it because marriage is really important you guys

Mr Ice Cream Glove
Apr 22, 2007
"If you put a hamburger in the toaster it'll say Happy Birthday."




Fiend posted:

Oh look Steven crowder showed up.



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJboMQhYh1k

flerp
Feb 25, 2014

I DON'T ALWAYS
HERDY DUR MUR FLERP FLERPITY
FLOOPIN
BUT WHEN I DO
I YER DER FLERPITY
THURN DER DERMIN
BORK! BORK! BORK!







jim bob

Clochette
Aug 12, 2013



Amarcarts posted:

"Be the Jim you want to see in the Bob" -Ghandi

Clochette
Aug 12, 2013



Josh Duggar Has ‘No Remorse’ For Cheating On Anna, Mistress List May Grow: Report

quote:

“19 Kids and Counting” star Josh Duggar isn’t sorry about being unfaithful to his wife of six years, Anna Duggar, Entertainment Tonight wrote in an exclusive report Tuesday. The former TLC reality star was already embroiled in a sex scandal when he was exposed in the Ashley Madison hack last month. Duggar issued an apology before he went to a rehab center, but apparently it wasn’t sincere.

"He is not the person everyone thought they knew,” an insider told ET. “No remorse,” the person said about Josh Duggar’s public statements that claimed the contrary. He called himself “the biggest hypocrite” and edited out the part that said he was addicted to pornography in his Aug. 20 admission.

Since Josh Duggar, 27, went to rehab, one of his reputed mistresses -- porn star Danica Dillon -- came forward. The list of supposed mistresses will likely increase since the father-of-four had various social media accounts and was on several dating sites, like OKCupid, the insider said.

Anna Duggar probably didn’t know about the infidelity because he traveled “all the time” for work. "When she found out about the cheating, she just cried,” the source said. “Anna didn't check up on Josh because she trusted him."

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001
Probation
Can't post for 2 hours!


Fun Shoe


jib berb

DrManiac
Feb 29, 2012





I wonder how many people his wife hosed without him knowing?


[E] never mind I bet he hosed around too

Uncle Wemus
Mar 4, 2004

HEY, WAIT! STOP!

I HAVE SIMPSONS MEMES


So what's the process in matching people in Christian arranged marriages

Geoj
May 28, 2008

BITTER POOR PERSON


Uncle Wemus posted:

So what's the process in matching people in Christian arranged marriages

Two fundie families have a son and a daughter who are roughly the same age. That's about it.

WayAbvPar
Mar 11, 2009

Ah- Smug Mode.




quote:

Steven Crowder is a comedian and Fox News contributor

I was under the impression that someone had to be funny in some manner before they could be called a comedian? If we are just picking job titles at random, I am an astronaut. And Tang tastes like sadness.

Casimir Radon
Aug 1, 2008




Geoj posted:

Two fundie families have a son and a daughter who are roughly the same age. That's about it.
Plus perceived benefits. Really not all that different from the way royalty handled it for centuries. Except it's either white-trash of the monied or unmonied variety in this case.

Toadvine
Mar 16, 2009
Please disregard my advice w/r/t history.

I just learned about soaking this week. Sounds pretty hot, might try it soon.

Geoj
May 28, 2008

BITTER POOR PERSON


Casimir Radon posted:

Plus perceived benefits. Really not all that different from the way royalty handled it for centuries. Except it's either white-trash of the monied or unmonied variety in this case.

There was politics behind most of the arranged marriages among European royalty though - marry off your offspring to the offspring of your rivals to ensure an alliance or at least prevent whatever nation from attacking you. Not to say this didn't end up with hosed up situations and inbreeding, but it was light years ahead of modern christian fundamentalists marrying off their children as quickly as possible to the children of other like-minded families so they can crank out even more god warriors.

With the Duggar gravy train off the rails it's pretty much unmonied white trash marrying unmonied white trash now.

The Bible
May 8, 2010



Geoj posted:

Two fundie families have a son and a daughter who are roughly the same age. That's about it.

These are religious fundies, remember. Women are breeding stock and are ready to reproduce the moment they first menstruate.

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007


Uncle Wemus posted:

So what's the process in matching people in Christian arranged marriages

Same as it is in any relationship search. You look for the best wealth/skills/attractiveness/social status that you can find and your quarry does the same. This regularly ends up with a couple that is very similar in those respects after a long process of being rejected by many other (better) potential mates. With a large family behind you negotiating a contract, there's actually more wiggle room to come out ahead or behind.

Wanamingo
Feb 22, 2008

by FactsAreUseless


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DEirwaizpCY

The Bible
May 8, 2010



Pvt.Scott posted:

Same as it is in any relationship search. You look for the best wealth/skills/attractiveness/social status that you can find and your quarry does the same. This regularly ends up with a couple that is very similar in those respects after a long process of being rejected by many other (better) potential mates. With a large family behind you negotiating a contract, there's actually more wiggle room to come out ahead or behind.

No, you pray until God tells you who he wants you to marry and then later probably divorce, because God really isn't so great at the matchmaking game.

Indubitable Leg
Aug 9, 2013


Speaking of alliances and fickle picking I wonder how many other quiverfulls that married into the Duggar clan are cursing the sky once the gravy train crashed and burned. Now that Jim Bob found himself in the position of Walder Frey, is he gonna have to start paying the bride/groom's weight in silver?

Buh
May 17, 2008


Uncle Wemus posted:

So what's the process in matching people in Christian arranged marriages

Most of them wouldn't consider marrying outside their religion so it ends up like small town dating where you only have six viable choices so you just pick one when you're 19 and hope for the best.

Geoj
May 28, 2008

BITTER POOR PERSON


The Bible posted:

These are religious fundies, remember. Women are breeding stock and are ready to reproduce the moment they first menstruate.

That's more down the road of Mormon fundamentalists - creepy old guys marrying pre-teen girls and running the boys off the compound once they reach puberty to keep the competition down.

At least going off of the Duggar model quiverfulls seem to marry more or less within their age group.

Captain Shortbus
May 14, 2011



Isn't there supposed to be a livestock exchange as well? Besides the bride, of course.

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

🚣RowboatMan: ❄️Freezing time🕰️ is an old P.I. 🥧trick...



I don't think this has been posted yet, but I guess Amy waited for the annoying family members to leave before do wild and crazy things... like dancing.

http://www.inquisitr.com/2402565/am...-after-wedding/

quote:

It is also known that the Duggar family is opposed to dancing. However, Amy Duggar enjoys dancing. Therefore, she opted for a staged “send-off” to signal that the atmosphere at the party was about to change. This allowed the Duggar family and older guests to leave the party early before the dancing, drinking, and eventual “official” motorcycle send-off took place.

This would have been the perfect wedding for Kevin Bacon to show up at.

Casimir Radon
Aug 1, 2008




Geoj posted:

There was politics behind most of the arranged marriages among European royalty though - marry off your offspring to the offspring of your rivals to ensure an alliance or at least prevent whatever nation from attacking you. Not to say this didn't end up with hosed up situations and inbreeding, but it was light years ahead of modern christian fundamentalists marrying off their children as quickly as possible to the children of other like-minded families so they can crank out even more god warriors.

With the Duggar gravy train off the rails it's pretty much unmonied white trash marrying unmonied white trash now.
It's still the same thing with fundamentalists, except the alliances get them access to the kind of things that hicks think are important. "We've arranged for you to marry Levi (Extreme white-trash name) cause' his dad owns 2 7-11s. One you done consummated things we can have all the free Slushys we want!"

DrManiac
Feb 29, 2012



Geoj posted:

There was politics behind most of the arranged marriages among European royalty though - marry off your offspring to the offspring of your rivals to ensure an alliance or at least prevent whatever nation from attacking you. Not to say this didn't end up with hosed up situations and inbreeding, but it was light years ahead of modern christian fundamentalists marrying off their children as quickly as possible to the children of other like-minded families so they can crank out even more god warriors.

With the Duggar gravy train off the rails it's pretty much unmonied white trash marrying unmonied white trash now.




Duggar crusader kings 2 mod when

GORILLA BASTARD
Jun 20, 2005

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN


Immortan posted:

Imagine marrying someone you've never hosed. :stonk:

Christian girls are the biggest whores going. Lots of oral & anal. Getting to the pussy though is your own personal Everest.

I would blow Dane Cook
Dec 26, 2008


Rupert Buttermilk posted:

I don't think this has been posted yet, but I guess Amy waited for the annoying family members to leave before do wild and crazy things... like dancing.

http://www.inquisitr.com/2402565/am...-after-wedding/


This would have been the perfect wedding for Kevin Bacon to show up at.

Ah reminds me of the old joke about why baptists are opposed to premarital sex.

Casimir Radon
Aug 1, 2008




Rupert Buttermilk posted:

I don't think this has been posted yet, but I guess Amy waited for the annoying family members to leave before do wild and crazy things... like dancing.
For my grandma's 80th birthday party she was really conflicted about not inviting some of her church friends. In her church they all talk a good game about how drinking is awful and against god, of course almost all of them are really big drinkers, but then again some of them actually take it seriously and would have their little worlds shattered if they saw their friends drinking.

Vicodiva
Sep 27, 2012


Geoj posted:

There was politics behind most of the arranged marriages among European royalty though - marry off your offspring to the offspring of your rivals to ensure an alliance or at least prevent whatever nation from attacking you. Not to say this didn't end up with hosed up situations and inbreeding, but it was light years ahead of modern christian fundamentalists marrying off their children as quickly as possible to the children of other like-minded families so they can crank out even more god warriors.

With the Duggar gravy train off the rails it's pretty much unmonied white trash marrying unmonied white trash now.

Jim Bobsburgh

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Good Soldier Svejk
Jul 5, 2010




Jim Bob?

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