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Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Don't be so gloomy. After all it's not that awful. Like the fella says, in Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance.






Smellrose

KFC Nashville Hot Chicken

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Max Hammer
Jan 3, 2008

ANTIFREEZE!!!


Pope Corky the IX posted:

A proud tradition of children sucking on two-liter bottles of Pepsi as soon as their strength and motor skills allow.

I don't think strength or motor skills mater, considering being breastfed from Mama June is probably akin to deepthroating concentrated High Fructose Corn Syrup. And if one of these inbred motherfuckers don't want to breastfeed, I'm sure they can just load up Junior's sippy cup with Jolt Cola.

Pope Corky the IX
Dec 18, 2006

What are you looking at?

That's actually a thing. Mama June's three-thumbed infant grandson drinks Mountain Dew out of a baby bottle.

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

RowboatMan: Freezing time is an old P.I. trick...


Pope Corky the IX posted:

That's actually a thing. Mama June's three-thumbed infant grandson drinks Mountain Dew out of a baby bottle.

Yeah, I've heard of this, though not specifically about them. To those mothers, it's cheaper to feed your child Mountain Dew rather than formula.

There's wrong written all over that situation.

Alan Smithee
Jan 3, 2005

by Fluffdaddy


Is she still dating the child didler

Holy poo poo how many reality tv stars aren't raping kids sometimes their own

Krispy Wafer
Jul 26, 2002

I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat



Grimey Drawer

Mountain Dew is super popular in Appalachia. Technically Mama June isn't in Appalachia, but she's close enough.

http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt...palachias-teeth

I never heard of giving babies Coca-Cola or sweet tea in a bottle, but I've been asked more than once if I got Coke as a baby. So apparently it's been a thing in my state for a long long time.

BrigadierSensible posted:

But that's the thing. Is it a Christian audience?

I always thought the audiences for TLC's trashpeople shows was middle class educated types looking down on the plebs and laughing/clutching their pearls/being disgusted.

Some are, but there are a terrifyingly large number of people who watch Honey BooBoo and identify with more than one member of that family.

It's like one of those Facebook quizzes, 'Which Honey BooBoo are you?'. Let me be Pumpkin. Please let me be Pumpkin.

Facebook Aunt
Oct 4, 2008

a cat




Alan Smithee posted:

Is she still dating the child didler

Holy poo poo how many reality tv stars aren't raping kids sometimes their own

Makes sense. If 20% of girls and 5-10% of boys are victims of sexual abuse, what percentage of adults must be abusers? It must be something like at least 1 or 2%, right? Most abusers don't have dozens of victims, it isn't like there are 5 guys going around raping all the kids in the country, so in america there must be literally millions of them.

happyhippy
Feb 21, 2005

Playing games, watching movies, owning goons. 'sup


Pillbug

Pope Corky the IX posted:

That's actually a thing. Mama June's three-thumbed infant grandson drinks Mountain Dew out of a baby bottle.


Rupert Buttermilk posted:

Yeah, I've heard of this, though not specifically about them. To those mothers, it's cheaper to feed your child Mountain Dew rather than formula.

There's wrong written all over that situation.

Part of the reason why Honey Boo Boo became notorious was for the 'GoGo' Juice she was given before each pagent.
The GoGo Juice was Red Bull and Mountain Dew in the one cup.
To a 4 year old.

Nostalgia4Infinity
Feb 27, 2007

"Forget it Jake, it's Sooze-Town" Is that me? Am I the Suddenly Sooze-Town of people??


happyhippy posted:

Part of the reason why Honey Boo Boo became notorious was for the 'GoGo' Juice she was given before each pagent.
The GoGo Juice was Red Bull and Mountain Dew in the one cup.
To a 4 year old.

How is this not child abuse?!

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

RowboatMan: Freezing time is an old P.I. trick...


EDIT: ^^^ No idea, man.

happyhippy posted:

Part of the reason why Honey Boo Boo became notorious was for the 'GoGo' Juice she was given before each pagent.
The GoGo Juice was Red Bull and Mountain Dew in the one cup.
To a 4 year old.

gently caress people forever, jesus christ.

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007


To answer the question about how many child molesters are out there, I assume you'd want to work for Child Protective Services or a sex crime unit for the cops or something. I would recommend having a backup career for your inevitable burnout.

Nine of Eight
Apr 28, 2011


Dinosaur Gum

At least the sex crimes unit, from what I understand cops are rotated out after a certain period to make sure they don't burn out. Get sent on a vacation doing traffic violations or something I guess.

Jonny 290
May 5, 2005

[A]sk me about OS/2 WARP


Pvt.Scott posted:

To answer the question about how many child molesters are out there, I assume you'd want to work for Child Protective Services or a sex crime unit for the cops or something. I would recommend having a backup career for your inevitable burnout.

have a buddy that doesnt even do the sex crimes investigation, he just works for cps. emotionally he is a dead man walking

Commie NedFlanders
Mar 8, 2014



wow this thread is so long, so what's the goon consensus? is incest actually best?

cynic
Jan 19, 2004



Jonny 290 posted:

have a buddy that doesnt even do the sex crimes investigation, he just works for cps. emotionally he is a dead man walking

I once worked for the archive department of the cps equivalent here, and it was like the warehouse in raiders of the lost arc but instead of cool relics it was just mile after mile of police and medical reports on indescribably sick poo poo and 90% of it ended in 'sick gently caress but not enough evidence to prosecute'. I lasted about 3 months there.

Commie NedFlanders
Mar 8, 2014



Pvt.Scott posted:

To answer the question about how many child molesters are out there, I assume you'd want to work for Child Protective Services or a sex crime unit for the cops or something. I would recommend having a backup career for your inevitable burnout.

people close to me do in fact work for CPS, some are social workers, some work specifically with victims of child abuse



even from a little bit of a distance, the horror is astonishing. i've become privy of the statistics in my area and it's so upsetting


it is VERY common, like WAYYYYY too common for the brain to handle, and most of the time it's biological parents who are abusing their own children like



just reading the statistics is gut wrenching, but the emotional load of working closely with these victims....... oh Lord bless these brave souls who work in such an emotionally exhaustive environment.

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007


What if we're the weird ones?

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007

In the end, they just sulk.



Krispy Kareem posted:

Mountain Dew is super popular in Appalachia. Technically Mama June isn't in Appalachia, but she's close enough.

http://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt...palachias-teeth

I never heard of giving babies Coca-Cola or sweet tea in a bottle, but I've been asked more than once if I got Coke as a baby. So apparently it's been a thing in my state for a long long time.

It's not just your state. There's a reason Early Childhood Caries is considered a serious public health problem worldwide, in both developed and developing countries alike. Socioeconomic status, education level, and the oral hygiene level of the parent/guardian are much bigger factors than region.

LingcodKilla
Dec 28, 2002

I ate too much crab and transformed into this.


Julet Esqu posted:

It's not just your state. There's a reason Early Childhood Caries is considered a serious public health problem worldwide, in both developed and developing countries alike. Socioeconomic status, education level, and the oral hygiene level of the parent/guardian are much bigger factors than region.

I had to do a double take on the oral hygiene because I thought you were talking about kiddie diddlers still.

eonwe
Aug 11, 2008



Lipstick Apathy

did anyone say eat fresh yet

Kinetica
Aug 16, 2011


Eonwe posted:

did anyone say eat fresh yet

Nope

Alan Smithee
Jan 3, 2005

by Fluffdaddy


Eonwe posted:

did anyone say eat fresh yet

well Im saying it now

EAT FRESH

The Bible
May 8, 2010



Alan Smithee posted:

well Im saying it now

EAT FRESH

What does this mean

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

~*Suck My Balls*~

Fun Shoe

eat fresh, guys

Regalingualius
Jan 6, 2012


The Bible posted:

What does this mean

It means it's time for Jared Bob.

flick my Mr. Bean
Nov 18, 2014



happyhippy posted:

Part of the reason why Honey Boo Boo became notorious was for the 'GoGo' Juice she was given before each pagent.
The GoGo Juice was Red Bull and Mountain Dew in the one cup.
To a 4 year old.

My wife and I watch Toddlers and Tiaras, the TLC show about little kid pageants, and holy poo poo do they try to kill their kids. One mom gives her four year old "tinker tea" which is pixie sticks mixed into a sippy cup with some awful combination of liquids like coffee, energy drinks, red bull, mountain dew, etc.

Frozen Horse
Aug 6, 2007
Just a humble wandering street philosopher.

I can only imagine what it's like to film this poo poo show:

Producer: Everyone gets everything he wants. I wanted a show to run, and for my sins, they gave me one. Brought it up to me like room service. It was a real choice show, and when it was over, I never wanted another.

Producer: [voice-over] I was going to the worst place in the world and I didn't even know it yet. hours away and hundreds of frequent-flier miles up a river that snaked through the culture-wars like a main circuit cable plugged straight into Jim-Bob. It was no accident that I got to be the caretaker of Jim-Bob Duggar's memory any more than being back in Fayetteville was an accident. There is no way to tell his story without telling my own. And if his story really is a confession, then so is mine.

Production assistant: I'm Carlsen. I was sent from LA with this message for you three days ago, sir. They expected you here a little sooner. This is mail for the show's crew. You don't know how happy this makes me in delivering all this.
Producer: Why?
Production assistant: Because now I can get out of here... if I can find a way.
[a soft mixture of weeping and a wet slapping noise is heard from upstairs as the PA runs out the door]
Production assistant: You're in the rear end in a top hat of the world, dude!

TLC cameraman: I wish I had words, man. I wish I had words... I can tell ya something like the other day he wanted to kill me. Somethin' like that...
Producer: Why'd he wanna kill you?
TLC cameraman: Because I took his daughter's picture. He said "If you take her picture again, I'm gonna kill you." And he *meant* it.

Producer: [voice-over] The crew were mostly kids; rock & rollers with one foot in their grave.

Producer: Could we, uh... talk to Jim Bob?
TLC cameraman: Hey, man, you don't talk to the Duggar. You listen to him. The man's enlarged my mind. He's a warrior for Christ in the classic sense. I mean sometimes he'll... uh... well, you'll say "hello" to him, right? And he'll just walk right by you. He won't even notice you. And suddenly he'll grab you, and he'll throw you in a corner, and he'll say, "Do you know that 'if' is the middle word in life? If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you, if you can trust yourself when all men doubt you"... I mean I'm... no, I can't... I'm a little man, I'm a little man, he's... he's a great man! I should have been a pair of ragged claws scuttling across floors of silent seas...

TLC cameraman: The Nikes. You're looking at the Nikes. Sometimes he goes too far. He's the first one to admit it.

TLC cameraman: Jinger likes you because you're still alive.

Producer: [voice-over] Everybody wanted me to do it, him most of all. I felt like he was up there, waiting for me to take the fame away. He just wanted to go out like a preacher, standing up, not like some poor, wasted, rag-assed heretic. Even the southern pines wanted him forgotten, and that's who he really took his orders from anyway.

TLC cameraman: What are they going to say about him? What? Are they going to say he was a kind man? He was a wise man? He had plans? He had wisdom? Bullshit, man!

Inside Out Mom
Jan 9, 2004

Franklin B. Znorps
Dignity, Class, Internet

Jim Bob doesn't surf!

Alan Smithee
Jan 3, 2005

by Fluffdaddy


Bim Job feet rash

donkey salami
Jun 28, 2008

DUNK A DILL PICKLE REALDO

Grimey Drawer

A Duggar show without Jim Bob?

Someone must be joshing

UnfortunateSexFart
May 18, 2008

𒃻 𒌓𒁉𒋫 𒆷𒁀𒅅𒆷
𒆠𒂖 𒌉 𒌫 𒁮𒈠𒈾𒅗 𒂉 𒉡𒌒𒂉𒊑




donkey salami posted:

A Duggar show without Jim Bob?

Someone must be joshing

jurm burrrb was in the last episode. He said "smells great in here!" in a two second scene.

The Bible
May 8, 2010



Reverse Centaur posted:

jurm burrrb was in the last episode. He said "smells great in here!" in a two second scene.

I guess someone was eating fresh.

If you catch my meaning.

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

RowboatMan: Freezing time is an old P.I. trick...


Reverse Centaur posted:

jurm burrrb was in the last episode. He said "smells great in here!" in a two second scene.

Obviously not referring to their bedroom after trying for their 20th.

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007


According to the cup on my brother's desk, Subway's slogan is now "Fresh is what we do". TIA

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

RowboatMan: Freezing time is an old P.I. trick...


Pvt.Scott posted:

According to the cup on my brother's desk, Subway's slogan is now "Fresh is what we do". TIA

It'd be great if, when a hot liquid heats up the mug, hidden words below that say 'Not kids. We don't do kids.'

I would blow Dane Cook
Dec 26, 2008


Jim Bob

I would blow Dane Cook
Dec 26, 2008


In Touch has exclusively learned that more brands whose advertisements appeared on episode two of Jill & Jessa: Counting On have told TLC that they dont want to be associated with this (or any) Duggar show!

Wrigley: The candy giants ads for Skittles were run by mistake.
RELATED: Get the Latest on Ben and Jessa's Adoption Plans

It is never our intent to endorse content that could offend our consumers, a rep confirms, adding that any ads aired during shows featuring the Duggar family were an error.

Ring.com: A rep for the site says, The ad ran in error and Ring will not advertise during that show in the future.
Jill Jessa Duggar Ben Seewald Derrick Dillard Facebook
(Photo Credit: Facebook)

Combe Inc.: When we heard that our ad aired during Jill & Jessa: Counting On, we decided to adjust our media plan, a rep for the company, which manufactures Vagisil, explains.

Credit Karma: The company explains it bought screen time as part of a larger package. We will not be advertising on this show in the future.

Gazelle.com: The e-commerce company says that while it didnt explicitly block Counting On at first, they have since corrected that.

RELATED: Find Out What the Duggars are Saying About Josh After His Return From Rehab

RCN Corporation: A rep for the cable and phone provider reveals it did not intentionally choose to run an ad during Counting On.

X Out: A commercial for the acne treatment product ran during episode two.

That should not be interpreted as an endorsement of that show or the people associated with it, X Out said in a statement, adding that it doesnt select specific shows on which to advertise.

Jill Jessa Duggar Ben Seewald Derrick Dillard Jim Bob Michelle Duggar Family Blog
(Photo Credit: Duggar Family Blog)

Chattem, Inc.: Spots for the companys ACT Kids Batman Rinse and Childrens Nasacort ran in error during the show.
Chattem has never purchased advertising during any Duggar programming, a rep states.

In Touch exclusively reported in last week's issue that seven brands whose ads appeared during the premiere of Counting On were not only surprised but so unhappy they took action to make sure it wouldnt happen again.

Cici's Pizza: A rep for the chain explained, Cicis prides itself on being a family-friendly restaurant. We recently made a large advertising buy on cable television that spanned several networks but did not target any particular program. When we learned one of our ads was placed adjacent to controversial programming, we took immediate action to stop it.
RELATED: Find Out What Amy Duggar Thinks of Premarital Sex

The UPS Store: The company explains it made a large media buy as well.
It was not our intention to advertise on the program. This specific program is [now] on our list of exclusions as well as any other potential Duggar programming, said a rep.

Whitewave Foods: The brand has pulled its Silk Milk ads after one episode.
We have decided to no longer advertise this show moving forward. We are always listening to our consumers, whether it be to continuously enhance our products or carefully choose where to advertise.

Jill Jessa Duggar Ben Seewald Derrick Dillard Duggar Family Blog
(Photo Credit: Duggar Family Blog)

Choice Hotels: The company removed its advertising from 19 Kids and was unhappy to learn one of its ads ran during Counting On.
We are not a sponsor or an advertiser on any TV shows or specials about the Duggars, Choice Hotels said. If any ads run, it is an error of the network as our advertising agency has directed them to remove our advertising from the show.

Mattress Firm: After learning that we had two ads run during the premiere of the new TLC show Jill & Jessa: Counting On, we have instructed TLC not to air any future paid units during this show, said Casey Zuber, director of communications for Mattress Firm.
Media expert David Johnson, CEO of Strategic Visions, says TLC is going to have a tough time getting advertisers for Counting On.

The Duggars are radioactive right now, he explained. People will see that this new show is just a desperate ploy by the Duggars to reclaim the spotlight and hopefully make some dollars off the public.

Verizon Wireless: A rep said the company made a direct response buy, which means we did not have control over where the advertisement ran. We never intended to advertise on the program or on TLC.

Pure Michigan: The states tourism arm also wants nothing to do with the Duggars.

The Pure Michigan ads were not supposed to air during this program, and we were disappointed to hear that they had, a rep confirmed. We contacted TLC immediately after learning about this mistake, and have been assured no Pure Michigan ads will run on this program moving forward. The Counting On program does no meet our brand guidelines.

Now, with so many companies pulling their ads off the show, TLC is left to air promos for other TLC programs instead of paid ads.

For more updates on the Duggars, pick up the latest issue of In Touch, on newsstands now!

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Pope Corky the IX
Dec 18, 2006

What are you looking at?

Did TLC honestly think that the companies that fled in terror from '19 Kids' would happily endorse any other Duggar show on which Josh didn't appear? It looks like they didn't even notify anyone, just started running the ads without permission.

PassTheRemote
Mar 15, 2007

Number 6 holds The Village record in Duck Hunt.

The first one to kill wins.

Pope Corky the IX posted:

Did TLC honestly think that the companies that fled in terror from '19 Kids' would happily endorse any other Duggar show on which Josh didn't appear? It looks like they didn't even notify anyone, just started running the ads without permission.

TLC: we ain't gud on teh lernin...

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jojoinnit
Dec 13, 2010

Strength and speed, that's why you're a special agent.


Pope Corky the IX posted:

Did TLC honestly think that the companies that fled in terror from '19 Kids' would happily endorse any other Duggar show on which Josh didn't appear? It looks like they didn't even notify anyone, just started running the ads without permission.

TLC is right up there with their superstars when it comes to understanding things like "consent".

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