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Lord of Pie
Mar 2, 2007




Full Battle Rattle posted:

I remember when I played hide and seek and when you get found you get raped

I had a punchline for that but writing it made me too sad

To be fair that's only the sly version of hide and seek

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you irl
Jan 22, 2014




:sly:

Fiend
Dec 2, 2001


SteveVizsla posted:

They rescue pet wolves and wolfdogs,do a lot of community stuff educating people and kids about wolves and that wolfdogs don't make good pets, and do fashion photography. The request was unsolicited and they aren't broken which is why they turned it down. I think they must send out hundreds of offers each year, with most getting turned down or just not being interesting enough for tv.

They should rephrase their request with a focus on serving Jesus.

They should also name their meanest wolf Jesus.

They should also enlist Pixar and get Burt Reynolds to train like he did in All Dogs Go To Heaven. I don't want to hire Burt Reynolds, but he should work out more

Amarcarts
Feb 21, 2007

This looks a lot like suffering.


From atop his golden throne God Emperor Jim Bob has taken note of the liberal heresy on these forums. Gays, trannies, and atheists beware, he has sent his chief psyker, grand inquisitor grandma to planet GBS in the Something Awful system to commence exterminatus.

Mr. Hand
Apr 28, 2015

by Cowcaster


Hey guys, I am sharing controversial opinions about this subject matter in this thread please chime in.

http://forums.somethingawful.com/sh...hreadid=3724718

thx <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Lazy_Liberal
Sep 17, 2005

These stones are precious


hi grandma

SpeedGem
Sep 19, 2012

by Ralp


im megyn kelly of fox news, and i endorse "well kids molest family members all the time" with a straight face.

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012



the family that lays together stays together

uber_stoat
Jan 21, 2001





Pillbug

The Duggar seed will bring forth a new, holy, and righteous flowering of humanity, once Jehovah scours the Earth clean of the filth of the obamunists. A new day is dawning, and soon the sun will rise over Springdale and from those rays will be nourished a fine and beauteous crop of incestuous hillbilly mutants.

If you want a vision of the future, imagine dad and son raping the womenfolk forever.

etalian
Mar 20, 2006



SpeedGem posted:

im megyn kelly of fox news, and i endorse "well kids molest family members all the time" with a straight face.

if you kids aren't dreaming of molesting each other you have failed as a parent.

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014




Ramrod XTreme

still cant believe that all you have to do to make life is plomp ur gunk into a woman's hooha

then you get these sentient creatures that grow up and experience the abject horror that is existence

its really funny actually.

basement jihadist
Oct 3, 2002



yeah all you have to do is have sex with a gril, its so easy, ugh

maybe in japan where people are not so shallow

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

~*Suck My Balls*~

Fun Shoe

i hope everyone dies

Facebook Aunt
Oct 4, 2008

a cat




Chinatown posted:

i hope everyone dies

good news, everyone will

Murderion
Oct 4, 2009

2019. New York is in ruins. The global economy is spiralling. Cyborgs rule over poisoned wastes.

The only time that's left is
FUN TIME

Million Ghosts posted:

Is a man not entitled to the jim of his bob? "No," says the first son, "it belongs to me."

"Jessa, are you afraid of God?"

"No. But I'm afraid of you."

Say Nothing
Mar 4, 2013

by FactsAreUseless


...










...











Casimir Radon
Aug 1, 2008



Apparently In Touch still has mote dirt on them so this thing will keep rolling for some time.

Lazy_Liberal
Sep 17, 2005

These stones are precious


i still can't believe i'm eager to read a tabloid. is this what being an adult is like?

Mnemosyne
Jun 11, 2002

There's no safe way to put a cat in a paper bag!!

Top City Homo posted:

still cant believe that all you have to do to make life is plomp ur gunk into a woman's hooha

then you get these sentient creatures that grow up and experience the abject horror that is existence

its really funny actually.

To be fair, it's actually a lot more work than that for the woman.

Facebook Aunt
Oct 4, 2008

a cat




Mnemosyne posted:

To be fair, it's actually a lot more work than that for the woman.

It's often much harder on the woman than on the man.

basement jihadist
Oct 3, 2002



Angela Christine posted:

It's often much harder on the woman than on the man.

yeah loving right. in todays society, a man must be good looking, have money, a BMW maybe, act like a supreme gentleman to even get to sex... and he must spend moneyand stuff all so these girls do this and ITS EXPECTED and if you dont do it you're a failure and loser...

SMILLENNIALSMILLEN
Jun 26, 2009





CrowdControl posted:

In the recent interview, Jim Bob said something along the lines of "when he confessed the third time we really became concerned he might, you know, do it to the boys next time."

reasonable imo

basement jihadist
Oct 3, 2002



he should have received his purification by now, like on the morrow

Filox
Oct 3, 2014



Grimey Drawer

I just can't stop looking at this human politico-realigulous-pedotastic trainwreck.

Also, somewhat convinced young Josh Bob was working a humiliation fetish, what with all the confessing to JIMBOB and the Sacred Incubator.

...waiting confirmation that Josh confessions given while wearing a big, baggy, tent-like sweatshirt that covered boner boy the sinner to mid-thigh.

I would blow Dane Cook
Dec 26, 2008


quote:


To get the Josh Duggar story, InTouch utilized solid investigative journalism



Until Caitlyn Jenner displaced it in the tabloid firmament last week, the hottest story in America’s booming celebrity-gossip industry was the revelations about Josh Duggar. The eldest kid on the popular “19 Kids and Counting” reality TV series, Duggar, now 27, was identified in a 2005 police report as the alleged molester of five young girls, including four of his sisters, when he was a teenager.

Unlike the highly orchestrated Jenner story, the revelations about Duggar came from actual journalistic digging. And it came from a somewhat unlikely source: InTouch Weekly, a magazine and Web site not known as a giant of investigative journalism, even within the Kardashian-centric universe it inhabits.

InTouch’s last big splash, so to speak, was in January, when it photoshopped Jenner’s head onto a female model’s body to suggest what he might look like as a woman. At the time, Jenner’s intentions were rumored but unconfirmed, and InTouch’s cover was widely denounced as trashy and insensitive.

Yet InTouch has led coverage of the sordid Duggar story with what looks like solid reporting. Although rumors about Duggar’s past have appeared periodically on the Internet for years, the magazine nailed it by disclosing the police investigation and incident report. It subsequently revealed that Duggar’s father, Jim Bob, waited a year before reporting the allegations to authorities.

Not long after InTouch dropped its first bombshell, Josh Duggar resigned from his job at the Family Research Council, a conservative advocacy group based in Washington. His parents later acknowledged the veracity of the allegations, and Josh Duggar has apologized for “my wrongdoing.” Meanwhile, TLC, the cable network owned by Discovery Communications of Silver Spring, Md., has put “19 Kids and Counting” in limbo, its return to the air uncertain.

The scoops have damaged the Duggars’ wholesome image, but they have been very, very good for InTouch, which competes against supermarket-checkout titans such as the National Enquirer, Star and OK! as well as Web sites such as Gawker, RadarOnline and TMZ. Most of InTouch’s 425,000 weekly copies are sold on newsstands, and the sensational Duggar headlines have produced a 15 percent bump in sales, at $2.99 per copy. Web traffic has shot up 25 percent, the magazine said.

“This all comes from good, basic journalism,” said David Perel, editorial director of InTouch and its sister gossip-purveyors, Life & Style and Closer. “It comes from being there. It’s knowing where to attack and where to start digging.”

The Duggar “get” is perhaps the highest-profile story InTouch has published since it was launched in 2002 by Bauer Media Group, a magazine and broadcasting conglomerate based in Germany.

The previous biggest story for the magazine, which is based in Englewood Cliffs, N.J., was its 2013 exclusive about the late Robert Kardashian’s diaries. The famed lawyer revealed “a heartbreaking childhood portrait of [daughters] Kim, Kourtney and Khloé and a damning picture,” as InTouch put it, of the Kardashian kids’ mother and his ex-wife, Kris, who later married Bruce Jenner.

The Duggar story came together quickly over a three-week period, said Perel, a veteran tabloid editor who joined the publication in late 2013 after guiding both the National Enquirer and Radar Online. He won’t name the magazine’s sources, but a woman named Tandra Barnfield apparently was a helpful guide.

Barnfield was contacted by an InTouch reporter, Melissa Roberto, earlier this year after Barnfield posted a photo on Instagram of her kissing her wife, Samantha Muzny, in front of the Duggars’ home near Springdale, Ark. The photo — a protest, Barnfield said, of Michelle Duggar’s role in promoting opposition to an anti-discrimination initiative last year — had gone viral.

During their conversation, Barnfield, who lives in the Houston area but has family in Springdale, told Roberto about the police report. “It wasn’t like it was a rumor to us,” Barnfield said in an interview. “We knew all about it. . . . It wasn’t hard to get it. You just had to know where to look.”

In fact, it was a little more complicated than that. Perel quickly dispatched two reporters to Springdale and hired a local law firm to advise the magazine about Arkansas’ open-records law, which enables residents (but not reporters from New Jersey) to obtain public documents.

The law firm filed the records request — and was rewarded with a copy of the original police report several days later. “We got it fast,” Perel said.

More requests and more documents followed, although Perel said the magazine hasn’t got everything it wanted. “Do I have more information on the Duggars in general?” he said. “Yes, I’d say we have some significant things coming out,” though he declined to say what.

Perel and Barnfield both deny that InTouch paid any sources for information, a common if ethically fraught practice among tabloid publications. (Perel, however, acknowledges that his magazine has paid for other stories.)

InTouch’s investigation of the Duggars has drawn the sort of recriminations and controversy that could form the basis of its own tabloid story. The most common line of attack, from Sarah Palin and Fox News, among others: that the stories are part of a left-wing media conspiracy against a family that has been a paragon of conservative values.

Perel has heard that before. When he was editing the National Enquirer, some of its scoops were also dismissed as politically motivated — but from alternating sides. The Enquirer enraged conservatives, for example, when it revealed radio host Rush Limbaugh’s addiction to pain killers. And it took heat from liberals when it revealed the extramarital affairs and out-of-wedlock children fathered by former Sen. John Edwards (D-N.C.) and civil rights activist the Rev. Jesse Jackson.

The InTouch editor also rebuts claims that the magazine revealed underage victims’ names in its Duggar stories. “In Touch did not name the victims in any of its articles,” he said. “Many people were able to correctly speculate about the identity of four of the victims by the information released by the city of Springdale. The fifth victim’s identity is also known to In Touch and has not been disclosed.”

Celebrity-obsessed or not, Perel cites principles that could govern any newsroom: “We always want to make sure we get the whole story. You always have to be digging for what you don’t know. . . . Our intent has been to simply tell the truth about a newsworthy personality.”


http://www.washingtonpost.com/lifes...d44e_story.html

Mr. Pumroy
May 20, 2001



bonestructure
Sep 25, 2008

by Ralp


Million Ghosts posted:

Is a man not entitled to the jim of his bob

Top City Homo
Oct 15, 2014




Ramrod XTreme

good to finally see some quality journalism i.e. the most basic loving techniques to get actual original content on the news stands

maybe real journalism is making a comeback because of the downward pressure to differentiate media from copy-paste journalism

pentyne
Nov 7, 2012

I just couldn't look at your old avatar anymore
Fucking nauseating!


Top City Homo posted:

good to finally see some quality journalism i.e. the most basic loving techniques to get actual original content on the news stands

maybe real journalism is making a comeback because of the downward pressure to differentiate media from copy-paste journalism



Actually it turns out that there really isn't that much work required once you know where to look. It's not like in the 50s and 60s where getting your hands on a physical copy of some report or document meant breaking into an office and using your microfiche camera.

InTouch has basically said "Well, all someone had to do was ask for it, and the police are required by law to release it, so they did."

I'd be more curious to hear about the judge who ordered the documents destroyed after the fact in whatever vain attempt it was to minimize the damage.

Mr. Pumroy
May 20, 2001



i'm gonna guess that the judge succeeded at minimizing it because odds are good there were like multiple more reports if not of josh than jbiomb and now they are ash

GET MY BELT SON
Sep 26, 2007



how long until a full on family suicide?

LingcodKilla
Dec 28, 2002

I ate too much crab and transformed into this.



a large trout posted:

how long until a full on family suicide?

I look forward to Duggar Death Day.

Darkman Fanpage
Jul 4, 2012



nooooooooooooo

Darkman Fanpage
Jul 4, 2012


lmao the small people are getting a small divorce!

HONG KONG SLUMLORD
Apr 21, 2003



Pillbug

LingcodKilla posted:

I look forward to Duggar Death Day.

I'm seriously afraid that JIM BOB will announce himself as JIM GOD and drown the kids in a bathtub for "inviting sin into the household" after he sets the compound on fire. poo poo will end very badly for these kids any way you cut it.

Automatic Slim
Jul 1, 2007

At the Union Hall since 1990.



Ripoff posted:

I'm seriously afraid that JIM BOB will announce himself as JIM GOD and drown the kids in a bathtub for "inviting sin into the household" after he sets the compound on fire. poo poo will end very badly for these kids any way you cut it.

Doubtful. There's no way to market and merchandise that.

TNG
Jan 4, 2001

by Lowtax


Hopefully Jim Bob, Michelle, and Josh drive into the side of the Wal-Mart they live right next to and the rest of the kids can have a chance at being real people.

I Shot The Serif
Jul 19, 2007

NEVER play "Lady of Spain" AGAIN!








:jimbob:





*Anyone who's got $30 and wants to, feel free to make this a smilie.

Dammit_Carl!
Mar 5, 2013


Ripoff posted:

I'm seriously afraid that JIM BOB will announce himself as JIM GOD and drown the kids in a bathtub for "inviting sin into the household" after he sets the compound on fire. poo poo will end very badly for these kids any way you cut it.

JIM BOB: Where's the vat, the vat, the vat? Where's the vat with the Green C on it? The vat with the Green C in. Bring it so we can begin.

MICHELLE: Go on unto the sink, and thank you Josh.

JIM BOB: ... Don't, don't fail to follow my advice. You'll be sorry. You'll be sorry. If we do it, than that they do it. Have trust. You have to step across. (Music.) We used to think this world was--this world was not our home--well, it sure isn't--we were saying--it sure wasn't.

He doesn't want to tell them. All he's doing--if they will tell them-- assure these kids. Can't some people assure these children of the relaxation of stepping over to the next plane? They set an example for others. We said --21 people who said, we don't like the way the world is.

VOICE: Take some.

JIM BOB: Take our life from us. We laid it down. We got tired. We didn't commit suicide, we committed an act of revolutionary suicide protesting the conditions of an inhumane world.

[Shamelessly stolen from Jim Jones' suicide tape transcript and modified and yes, I'm a horrible person]

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Ultimate Mango
Jan 18, 2005



Zamboni_Rodeo posted:


:jimbob:





*Anyone who's got $30 and wants to, feel free to make this a smilie.

The glasses need to be animated 'deal with it' style, but if they were, it would be worth my

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