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The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > SHUT THE FUCK UP BERMAN (DINGERFEST 2k15)

hunnert car pileup: Oct 28, 2007; ~free the tobacco sponsors~

William T. Hornaday posted:

I still want to see MVP 2005 style where they compete to be the first to hit a set distance, and homeruns get you an extra 100 points.

Shrink the players and hold the derby in someones living room like Triple Play 2001. Bonus points for whacking the bird in foul territory.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:56

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# ? Feb 14, 2025 13:58

ROCK THE HOUSE M.D.: Oct 9, 2003; I've got a case of malt liquor stashed in the trunk, Mr. Marvin Gaye on the CD. We are gonna get all the way down.

Machalsa? really....? :what:

:what:

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:56

Reformed Pissboy: Nov 6, 2003

Kevlar v2.0 posted:

I hope Machado's backswing hits the catcher in the head and the benches clear

oh yeah rooting against him for that too. boooooo is what I'm sayin'

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:56

GZA Genius: Jan 29, 2009

Can someone fill me in on the bonus time rule?

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:57

Poque: Sep 11, 2003; =^-^=

GZA Genius posted:

Can someone fill me in on the bonus time rule?

everybody gets 30 extra seconds because you basically just have to hit a homer to get it

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:57

Kevlar v2.0: Dec 25, 2003; Just Cubspost

GZA Genius posted:

Can someone fill me in on the bonus time rule?

If you hit at least one over 420 feet, you get an extra 30 seconds, I believe.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:57

DEAR RICHARD: Feb 5, 2009; IT'S TIME FOR MY TOOLS

GZA Genius posted:

Can someone fill me in on the bonus time rule?

hit a hr. bonus time.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:58

Shear Modulus: Jun 9, 2010

how many points if they hit the jumbotron

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:59

Duke Pukem: Oct 23, 2010; THE BIRD IS THE WORD

goddamn, this park was made for dingers

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:59

DeepDickPizza: Oct 11, 2012; THREE TIME! THREE TIME!

Manny Machalsa Spicy as Hell.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:59

Darude - Adam Sandstorm: Aug 16, 2012

i'm glad berman took a toilet break or wherever the gently caress he went

# ? Jul 14, 2015 00:59

DeepDickPizza: Oct 11, 2012; THREE TIME! THREE TIME!

In my opinion, they should sit Berman in center field and if you hit him, you automatically advance to the next round.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:00

Shadow Ninja 64: May 21, 2007; "I stood there, wondering why the puck was getting bigger...

and then it hit me."

MassaShowtime posted:

i'm glad berman took a toilet break or wherever the gently caress he went

He went back back back back back to the concession stand for another round of nachos.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:01

ITT new user names: Dec 29, 2004

JOCK HITHARD

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:01

Darude - Adam Sandstorm: Aug 16, 2012

put berman in a dunk tank, the button is the middle third of the OF seats

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:01

Duke Pukem: Oct 23, 2010; THE BIRD IS THE WORD

DeepDickPizza posted:

In my opinion, they should sit Berman in center field and if you hit him, you automatically advance to the next round.

If you hit him, your league gets home field advantage in the World Series

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:01

Duke Chin: Jan 11, 2002; _{^{Roger That:}}
MILK CRATES INBOUND

_{_{^{- FUCK THE HABS -}}}

mattfl posted:

they had pro tracer everywhere and mics on the players/caddies a lot of the time.

Ohhhhh maaaaaaaaaan I bet all the cranky, old, white hair, purist tv-watching folk were *literally shaking* at putting pro tracer on for everything :getin:

:getin:

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:01

R.D. Mangles: Jan 10, 2004

DeepDickPizza posted:

In my opinion, they should sit Berman in center field and if you hit him, you automatically advance to the next round.

they should drive him around the outfield in a slow-moving cart and you get 10 bonus dingers for knocking him off

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:02

Kevlar v2.0: Dec 25, 2003; Just Cubspost

Has Berman made up any Jeff "Brown Paper" Bagwell type nicknames yet?

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:02

GOOD TIMES ON METH: Mar 17, 2006; Fun Shoe

Apparently they took down the 'Hit Me Win A Car' Toyota truck in the outfield because Chevy is a sponsor haha

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:02

Shadow Ninja 64: May 21, 2007; "I stood there, wondering why the puck was getting bigger...

and then it hit me."

Kevlar v2.0 posted:

Has Berman made up any Jeff "Brown Paper" Bagwell type nicknames yet?

He revisited Albert "Winnie the" Pujols but I don't think I've heard any others.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:03

Darude - Adam Sandstorm: Aug 16, 2012

holy poo poo

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:03

Duke Pukem: Oct 23, 2010; THE BIRD IS THE WORD

good lord

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:03

Duke Chin: Jan 11, 2002; _{^{Roger That:}}
MILK CRATES INBOUND

_{_{^{- FUCK THE HABS -}}}

Shear Modulus posted:

how many points if they hit the jumbotron

None but extra fireworks shoot out and the announcer says boomshakalaka and tracers fly off your bat.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:03

Poque: Sep 11, 2003; =^-^=

good god Joc Jammin' Hard

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:03

ROCK THE HOUSE M.D.: Oct 9, 2003; I've got a case of malt liquor stashed in the trunk, Mr. Marvin Gaye on the CD. We are gonna get all the way down.

JOC IS KILLIN IT

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:03

ALFbrot: Apr 17, 2002

I hate Berman but I love how terrible he is as predicting distance

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:03

mattfl: Aug 27, 2004

Jesus this kid has some power.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:03

R.D. Mangles: Jan 10, 2004

joc owns

bashing boychik

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

Kevlar v2.0: Dec 25, 2003; Just Cubspost

Want a Joc/Bryant rookie final now

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

corn on the cop: Oct 12, 2012; Break what must be broken, once for all, that's all, and take the suffering on oneself.

â Corey Dostoyevsky

487~

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

Reformed Pissboy: Nov 6, 2003

holy poo poo pederson

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

R.D. Mangles: Jan 10, 2004

so many joc jams

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

ALFbrot: Apr 17, 2002

I want a kid to leap up and rob a home run in a derby someday

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

GOOD TIMES ON METH: Mar 17, 2006; Fun Shoe

Uh can we please trade Cueto for this guy thanks

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

DeepDickPizza: Oct 11, 2012; THREE TIME! THREE TIME!

Joc is cool and he should win.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

pipebomb: May 12, 2001; Dear God, what is it like in your funny little brains?
It must be so boring.

Goetta posted:

Apparently they took down the 'Hit Me Win A Car' Toyota truck in the outfield because Chevy is a sponsor haha

No ones ever hit the goddamned thing anyway. I'd love to see Todd smash it's windshield sometime.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

ALFbrot: Apr 17, 2002

Goetta posted:

Uh can we please trade Cueto for this guy thanks

the pitcher?

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:04

Squall: Mar 10, 2010; "...whatever."

I think Joc can hit baseballs hard? c/d

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:05

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# ? Feb 14, 2025 13:58

Poque: Sep 11, 2003; =^-^=

DeepDickPizza posted:

Joc is cool and he should win.

you monster.

# ? Jul 14, 2015 01:05

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