Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
AP
Jul 12, 2004

One Ring to fool them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to milk them all
and pockets fully line them


Grimey Drawer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M17YMw1mcxo

:gary:

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

OWLS!
Sep 17, 2009

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN



This is p. anime.

OWLS!
Sep 17, 2009

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN


The bad, sisterfucking kind of anime, not the neat jojo punchman kind.

eonwe
Aug 11, 2008



Lipstick Apathy

jojo is good

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard




https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/3veqx0/how_can_i_convince_my_partner_that_star_citizen/

Raskolnikov
Nov 25, 2003



Dear Reddit, send her a freelancer. I hear chicks dig those!

Raskolnikov fucked around with this message at 00:02 on Dec 5, 2015

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard




https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/3vdoth/i_have_to_say_it/



https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/3up6il/waste_of_money/cxhbnzd?context=3

Bootcha
Nov 13, 2012

Truly, the pinnacle of goaltending


Grimey Drawer


I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays
I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light, and made a switch
True? Yes

And I fortunately know a little marketing
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh
I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely, and depressed

Pathetic...

Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing for attention
That one wants to get inside
And do I help them?
Yes, indeed...

Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my desk
Crying, "Guidance, Sandi, please!"
And I help them?
Yes I do...

Now it's happened once or eight
Someone couldn't hold the faith
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls

Have we got a deal?

If I join the community team, I'll never be able to look at my family or friends again.

That's right
But you'll have your job, heh heh.
Life's full of tough choices, isn't it?
What I want from you is - your pride.

But without my pride, how can I-

You'll have your looks, your pretty face.
And don't underestimate the importance of body language, ha!

The boys out there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who fact-checks is a bore!
Yes out here it's much preferred for ladies not to say a word
And after all dear, what is idle prattle for?
COME ON, they're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it as a whale
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
It's she who holds her tongue will get her sale

Come on you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead!
Join the ride!
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much
Just your pride!
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad but true
If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet
You've got the pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Lesnick, Jared, now I've got her, boys
The boss is on a roll
This poor unfortunate soul

jaegerx
Sep 10, 2012

Maybe this post will get me on your ignore list!



Bootcha posted:

I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays
I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light, and made a switch
True? Yes

And I fortunately know a little marketing
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh
I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely, and depressed

Pathetic...

Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing for attention
That one wants to get inside
And do I help them?
Yes, indeed...

Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my desk
Crying, "Guidance, Sandi, please!"
And I help them?
Yes I do...

Now it's happened once or eight
Someone couldn't hold the faith
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls

Have we got a deal?

If I join the community team, I'll never be able to look at my family or friends again.

That's right
But you'll have your job, heh heh.
Life's full of tough choices, isn't it?
What I want from you is - your pride.

But without my pride, how can I-

You'll have your looks, your pretty face.
And don't underestimate the importance of body language, ha!

The boys out there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who fact-checks is a bore!
Yes out here it's much preferred for ladies not to say a word
And after all dear, what is idle prattle for?
COME ON, they're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it as a whale
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
It's she who holds her tongue will get her sale

Come on you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead!
Join the ride!
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much
Just your pride!
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad but true
If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet
You've got the pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Lesnick, Jared, now I've got her, boys
The boss is on a roll
This poor unfortunate soul

Liek dis if u cry ev8tim

Synchronized
Jul 24, 2011
Tick Tock.


For increased accuracy it should have been a slideshow.

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard




https://forums.robertsspaceindustries.com/discussion/301610/downtime-after-losing-one-life-getting-your-rear end-captured

Decrepus
May 21, 2008

In the end, his dominion did not touch a single poster.



This loving sucked. They open with a line that makes you think it might be funny but it loving sucks. gently caress.

e: cum omelette anime was better

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard




https://forums.robertsspaceindustries.com/discussion/282602/can-we-hide-other-pcs-planet-side

TTerrible
Jul 15, 2005


It's them. We found them. The person that likes all of the 15 second long animations to do anything for ~immersion~

MilesK
Nov 5, 2015




Think of how many referrals that video's gonna generate. Disney fanatics have been left out of this sperg-fest for too long.

Edit: and not one creeped out comment in the bunch

MilesK fucked around with this message at 00:47 on Dec 5, 2015

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard




https://forums.robertsspaceindustries.com/discussion/301438/a-word-for-the-cig-team-especially-the-development-and-devops-teams

Synchronized
Jul 24, 2011
Tick Tock.

The level of detachment from reality is reaching critical mass. Next they'll be declaring that the social module fulfils all of the promises made by CIG.

Tijuana Bibliophile
Dec 30, 2008



Scratchmo


How do you not go insane after reading all this horrible crap

D_Smart
May 11, 2010

by FactsAreUseless


College Slice

peter gabriel posted:

I have such a pride boner on right now I can't even tell you :v:

Well, the build was released earlier this evening as promised. So go get it and rejoice that you were a part of something awesome. :)

http://lodmmo.com/changelog/

D_Smart
May 11, 2010

by FactsAreUseless


College Slice

A Neurotic Jew posted:

I can't believe that after Ben Lesnick's excuse post they still haven't edited the trailer or description on Youtube. At least keep your story consistent; is it a mistake, or isn't it?

Maybe they need a different VP of marketing :confused:

It wasn't a mistake. It was intentional. Ben's a lying sack of poo poo.

They saw a chance to reach a wider audience with some false advertising; and they took it. Of course they'd apologize after the fact.

It's all about money.

Don't forget that that video at the awards, cost money. It's just like buying a TV spot for a commercial, but cheaper obviously. So much for not spending money on marketing, putting it all into development etc. Even more evidence of how they lie with impunity and they continue because well, they can, since nobody can stop them.

D_Smart
May 11, 2010

by FactsAreUseless


College Slice

Synchronized posted:

The level of detachment from reality is reaching critical mass. Next they'll be declaring that the social module fulfils all of the promises made by CIG.

They did that back when it was released. Then the drugs wore off.

Justin Tyme
Feb 22, 2011




Those people want to treat this game like real life and go out on walks planetside and mosey through the bar and lazily sit at a table in-game because they're too meek and unfulfilled to do it in real life. They would rather pretend to be well-rounded than to actually do it.

Like, there's nothing stopping you from going downtown tonight and you don't even need to sprint around all over the place pressing an imaginary USE whenever you stare at someone, why the gently caress would you want to do it in a fake world if not because you're an autist with crippling social phobia.

Amarcarts
Feb 21, 2007

This looks a lot like suffering.



Awesome it's like if I paid my employer to work there instead of the other way around!

Jobbo_Fett
Mar 7, 2014

Slava Ukrayini




Clapping Larry

Justin Tyme posted:

Those people want to treat this game like real life and go out on walks planetside and mosey through the bar and lazily sit at a table in-game because they're too meek and unfulfilled to do it in real life. They would rather pretend to be well-rounded than to actually do it.

Like, there's nothing stopping you from going downtown tonight and you don't even need to sprint around all over the place pressing an imaginary USE whenever you stare at someone, why the gently caress would you want to do it in a fake world if not because you're an autist with crippling social phobia.

Yeah, but in Star Citizen you can do it in Space. Balls in your court

Tijuana Bibliophile
Dec 30, 2008



Scratchmo

Justin Tyme posted:

Those people want to treat this game like real life and go out on walks planetside and mosey through the bar and lazily sit at a table in-game because they're too meek and unfulfilled to do it in real life. They would rather pretend to be well-rounded than to actually do it.

Like, there's nothing stopping you from going downtown tonight and you don't even need to sprint around all over the place pressing an imaginary USE whenever you stare at someone, why the gently caress would you want to do it in a fake world if not because you're an autist with crippling social phobia.

yeah but going out by yourself in your space suit, drinking lovely beers and calling yourself admiral is pretty weird in the real world

Trundel
Mar 13, 2005

:10bux: + :awesomelon: = :roboluv:
- a sound investment!

D_Smart posted:

:words:
Even more evidence of how they lie with impunity and they continue because well, they can, since nobody can stop them.

Pack it in guys, Croberts has won.

Be ready to sing your new International Anthem for our CIG overlords.

:gary: Paaaaaaarp :gary:

fuzzknot
Mar 22, 2009

Yip yip yip yip yip



You could start by spelling "definitely" correctly so she doesn't know you're an idiot right off the bat.

Xaerael
Aug 25, 2010

Marching Powder is objectively the worst poster known. He also needs to learn how a keyboard works.



Trundel posted:

Pack it in guys, Croberts has won.

Be ready to sing your new International Anthem for our CIG overlords.

:gary: Paaaaaaarp :gary:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oWTXl4hg0q8

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

My "Not Vincent Price" T-shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt.




Smellrose

Hello Space Inhabitants. I made some pasta tonight. Didn't bother making sauce since I had a jar of it in my cabinet.

Jobbo_Fett
Mar 7, 2014

Slava Ukrayini




Clapping Larry

ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:

Hello Space Inhabitants. I made some pasta tonight. Didn't bother making sauce since I had a jar of it in my cabinet.

Please tell me you at least purchased your sauce at Space Walgreens, lest you ruin my IMMERSION.


I made some 4-cheese lasagna for my ex once. Took a few hours to make, cook, etc and I have everything set on the table. Fine china, fine wine; I was razzledazzling her like you wouldn't believe! All was going well until the main course was unveiled and she cried out to me: "I CAN'T HAVE GLUTEN".



So I spaced her, and now I own 3 sexbots. Best drat Space Sex Ever.

fuzzknot
Mar 22, 2009

Yip yip yip yip yip


Bootcha posted:

I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays
I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light, and made a switch
True? Yes

And I fortunately know a little marketing
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh
I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely, and depressed

Pathetic...

Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing for attention
That one wants to get inside
And do I help them?
Yes, indeed...

Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my desk
Crying, "Guidance, Sandi, please!"
And I help them?
Yes I do...

Now it's happened once or eight
Someone couldn't hold the faith
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls

Have we got a deal?

If I join the community team, I'll never be able to look at my family or friends again.

That's right
But you'll have your job, heh heh.
Life's full of tough choices, isn't it?
What I want from you is - your pride.

But without my pride, how can I-

You'll have your looks, your pretty face.
And don't underestimate the importance of body language, ha!

The boys out there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who fact-checks is a bore!
Yes out here it's much preferred for ladies not to say a word
And after all dear, what is idle prattle for?
COME ON, they're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it as a whale
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
It's she who holds her tongue will get her sale

Come on you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead!
Join the ride!
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much
Just your pride!
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad but true
If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet
You've got the pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Lesnick, Jared, now I've got her, boys
The boss is on a roll
This poor unfortunate soul

Awwwwwww.

(This song is a shared favorite.)

Though I might also have gone with


Hey bro, take it slow
You ain't livin' in a video
You're flying low with a high velocity
No doubt, you're stressin' out
That ain't what this game's about
Get off that one way trip down lonely street

Now I know you've been kicked around
You ain't alone in this ugly town
You go on and buy that ship
It's not like it's all a gyp

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey stoopid
What ya tryin' to do
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey stoopid
They win, you lose
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey stoopid

C'mon girl, it's a better day
Get your cash out of that grave
Don't let that one game tear your world apart
C'mon babe, kick that stuff
Show the 'verse it ain't so tough
Quit lyin' around with a crippled, broken heart

Now I know you've been seeing red
Don't put a pistol to your head
Sometimes your answer's heaven sent
Your way is so drat permanent

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey stoopid
What ya tryin' to do
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey stoopid
They win, you lose
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey stoopid

This ain't common sense talkin'
You know, I know
Your story ain't so shocking
You know, I know
Blow some Steam
C'mon and scream

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey stoopid
What ya tryin' to do
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey stoopid
They win, you lose
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey stoopid



Yeah, I dunno. I'm too lazy to spend much time on it. Oh well.

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

My "Not Vincent Price" T-shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt.




Smellrose

Jobbo_Fett posted:

Please tell me you at least purchased your sauce at Space Walgreens, lest you ruin my IMMERSION.

Space Vons actually.

Jobbo_Fett
Mar 7, 2014

Slava Ukrayini




Clapping Larry

ALL-PRO SEXMAN posted:

Space Vons actually.

I knew you were a Space Commie

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

My "Not Vincent Price" T-shirt has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my shirt.




Smellrose

Jobbo_Fett posted:

I knew you were a Space Commie

Space I Space am.

Awesome!
Oct 17, 2008

Ready for adventure!




hey guys hows the star citizenship going

Jobbo_Fett
Mar 7, 2014

Slava Ukrayini




Clapping Larry

Awesome! posted:

hey guys hows the star citizenship going

Sent my application in, waiting on Croberts to validate me and I can become a hermit Spaceman!

Sarsapariller
Aug 14, 2015

Occasional vampire queen



Okay, time to put some work in on the PTU. Apparently there's a new patch in the works, but there hasn't been one out in several days, so I'm looking for a mission that I haven't yet done. I think this time I will attempt to put some of the expanded-world claims to rest, one way or the other. I'm going to try to fly to some of the stations, and fly around the moons. We will see if that is possible.

Attempt 1: Looks like there's a new bug on the block- I am not crashing, but the loading screen appears to be hung. But then at long last I load in. I'm floating in deep space, in a tangle of bodies and ship weapons. I right alt + backspace to suicide, and thankfully wake up in a bed on the station. It appears my character may have taken a trip on the Event Horizon however, because this is the station from hell. Everything is jittery. The other players are juking around, the station arms are back to jumping randomly in their rotation, none of the doors work, the consoles are all cycling through their loading animations four or five times before displaying anything... it's awful. Worst of all, head bob is back. I don't know what the gently caress they did but it's back and worse than ever before- I actually stop using shift to run because it's so nausea inducing. After hammering on an airlock control for 10 seconds, I finally get it to register and get outside. All the pads are full- apparently this server's been running for a while which may explain the general shittyness. I get my Gladius fired up, and decide I'm going to try to see the backside of the moon that space station Kareah is at. I warp to the station and engage cruise- quantum being way too fast- and sit back for a 10 minute flight. About two minutes in, I get a "Server Connection Lost" message- while still in flight. Hmm, that's a new one. Then the game crashes.

Attempt 2: Oh- they kicked me off because they just rolled a drat patch out. Well that's annoying because it'll be another hour before it's done, so in the meantime I will make fun of the patch notes.

Patch Notes posted:

Multicrew ships(Constellation and Retaliator) are sometimes encountering issues with their elevator collision.

No poo poo. This is the understatement of the century, somewhere between "Hiroshima feels unseasonably warm for August" and "Star Citizens are a little carefree with their money." The elevators aren't just bugged, they are lethal. Half the time trying to board one in deep space will just catapult you into the void at warp 2.

Patch Notes posted:

A bunch of news about contacts.

I keep seeing stuff about parties and contacts but I have no idea how you manage them. People say you hit F11 but that brings up a blank blue window for me that isn't interactable in any way. So much of the Star Citizen UI depends on secret knowledge of key commands that Citizens don't really seem willing to divulge.

More Notes posted:

Fixed an issue where the lights in the center of AstroArmada would flicker on and off as the characters ran through the center.

Well thank God. Years behind schedule, release is bugged to poo poo, oops our boss actually put out a trailer that told people it's out and ready to play. But at least we fixed a lighting bug in the social module level that everyone forgot about after the first loving week! I hope whoever fixed that one took an hour off, as a pat on the back.

The notes keep on a'comin posted:

Fixed several server-side crashes and performance problems. Fixed several client crashes around port Olisar

This is patch G. This is the 7th straight patch that has "Fixed several server-side crashes and performance problems." Assuming that "Several" is a generously low estimate of two per patch, that means there were at least fourteen loving server-side crashes and performance problems when they first kicked this out the door. And after all this it's still not stable! I'm picturing a code base where half of the functions were just comments like "//Uh... todo: give to the intern" and "//Implement this before somebody fires me"

Well, poo poo, there's barely anything else in here and I have 45 more minutes to go on this download. Don't know why they're pushing out a full copy of the game every time they patch. I guess I will sign off on this one and chronicle my attempts when I can get back on.

trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

Invoking fairy dust is not a crime.


Sarsapariller posted:

Well, poo poo, there's barely anything else in here and I have 45 more minutes to go on this download. Don't know why they're pushing out a full copy of the game every time they patch. I guess I will sign off on this one and chronicle my attempts when I can get back on.

How many GBs of star citizen have you downloaded in total?

Sarsapariller
Aug 14, 2015

Occasional vampire queen



trucutru posted:

How many GBs of star citizen have you downloaded in total?

Several hundred at the very least.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

ErIog
Jul 11, 2001

:nsacloud:


Are Australian Star Citizens just like, "This 2.0 pre-alpha alpha version 6 is totally worth all the bandwidth overages I'm paying every month!"

  • Locked thread