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  • Locked thread
widespread
Aug 5, 2013

I believe I am now no longer in the presence of nice people.


I got tommorow comin' IN in in in in....

Biiiiiiiiirds.

Also thanks for the crits.

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Dr. Kloctopussy
Apr 22, 2003

"It's time....to DIE!"
In

dmboogie
Oct 4, 2013

Been a while, and birds are rad.

In

Crab Destroyer
Sep 3, 2011
In.

anime was right
Jun 27, 2008

death is certain
keep yr cool
in

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010
Cool. In.

BeefSupreme
Sep 14, 2007

to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022
in

Jay W. Friks
Oct 4, 2016


Got Out.
Grimey Drawer
In. I'll regurgitate onto the paper instead of into the mouth of the baby bird.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.
In. I hate birds! :smith:

Armack
Jan 27, 2006
In.

J.A.B.C.
Jul 2, 2007

There's no need to rush to be an adult.


My favorite bird is the fINch.

250 words. Let's do this.

a friendly penguin
Feb 1, 2007

trolling for fish

In

Tyrannosaurus
Apr 12, 2006
I am IN for this spooky Halloween prompt!

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003

Tyrannosaurus posted:

I am IN for this spooky Halloween prompt!

hahaha poo poo.

anime was right
Jun 27, 2008

death is certain
keep yr cool
birds are loving scary they're goddamn flying dinosaurs thats halloween as poo poo

Some Strange Flea
Apr 9, 2010

AAA
Pillbug
Sure yes okay, I'd like to bird please wait there's no sign-up deadline, why am I doing this?

Whatever. In

Sarkimedes
Jul 2, 2012
[bird pun]. In.

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003
Still looking for one more judge!

ThirdEmperor
Aug 7, 2013

BEHOLD MY GLORY

AND THEN

BRAWL ME
in

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003
Thanks to Grizzled Patriarch and sparksbloom for volunteering to judge this week. We will try to be the fastest and goodest judges around.

ZeBourgeoisie
Aug 8, 2013

THUNDERDOME
LOSER

newtestleper posted:

Thanks to Grizzled Patriarch and sparksbloom for volunteering to judge this week. We will try to be the fastest and goodest judges around.

Domespeed, brother.

Mercedes
Mar 7, 2006

"So you Jesus?"

"And you black?"

"Nigga prove it!"

And so Black Jesus turned water into a bucket of chicken. And He saw that it was good.




What the heck. I'll-

IN!!!

Beige
Sep 13, 2004
I cannot follow simple instructions. We write a 250 word story with the prompt "birds" and submit it both here and to the website provided?

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk









Beige posted:

I cannot follow simple instructions. We write a 250 word story with the prompt "birds" and submit it both here and to the website provided?

yeah

The Saddest Rhino
Apr 29, 2009

Put it all together.
Solve the world.
One conversation at a time.



In btw

Hawklad
May 3, 2003


Who wants to live
forever?


DIVE!

College Slice
IN

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


In

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003
I'll close registrations tonight at 11:59pm PST.

Beige
Sep 13, 2004
Alright, I'm in.

Chairchucker
Nov 14, 2006

to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022




in i guess

kurona_bright
Mar 21, 2013
In
:toxx:

QuoProQuid
Jan 12, 2012

Tr*ckin' and F*ckin' all the way to tha
T O P

:toxx: in

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

Ironic Twist
Aug 3, 2008

I'm bokeh, you're bokeh
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_DZ6wGbSYvY

What about me?



What

about

Twist



yeah okay, in

Chili
Jan 23, 2004

college kids ain't shit


Fun Shoe
Oh sweet, still open.

Inburgers

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010
edit out for submission reasons

SurreptitiousMuffin fucked around with this message at 20:37 on Nov 18, 2016

SurreptitiousMuffin
Mar 21, 2010
Proof of submission:



edit:

SurreptitiousMuffin fucked around with this message at 09:24 on Oct 29, 2016

Sitting Here
Dec 31, 2007
Since the prompt post encourages cooperation, I want to remind people that there are some excellent crits happening in the IRC channel. Just mentioning this factoid so everyone has the same opportunity for feedback this week. The busiest hours tend to be roughly between 9AM and 9PM PST.

newtestleper
Oct 30, 2003
Signups closed! Look forward to your submissions.

newtestleper fucked around with this message at 10:00 on Oct 29, 2016

J.A.B.C.
Jul 2, 2007

There's no need to rush to be an adult.


Story submitted to Flash Frontier. I'll post up the screenshot when they reply.

War on the Wings
250 words


I watched Faisal slam the door closed on his truck, a tarp hastily tied over the skeletal frame. From within I can hear the calls of the Ibises and Pochards, crammed into cages stacked atop one another, fluttering in vain to escape their prisons. They didn't know how fortunate they were. The other animals had to fend for themselves now.

A bomb exploded some distance away, its violent roar sending a chill down my spine as the wind pushed my graying hair aside. “Hurry, Faisal,” I called to my assistant, looking over the tie-downs once more. They would hold, god willing. “Time has run out.”

He nodded to me, his youthful eyes filled with frightful, angry tears. “drat the Arianans!” He shouted as he turned to hop into the front seat. “Get in!”

I stepped over to his seat, my hand on his shoulder. “The allies are coming from the West. Drive, and don't stop until you see them.” I said, turning to walk away.

“Don't be a fool!” Faisal cried openly now. “The others aren't coming!”

I turned on my heel and shouted in fury. “This is my home!” I roared over the gunshots. “It will not die alone!”

He stared at me, frustration in his gaze before he started the engine. “God help you.” He said, barely audible over the grinding gears, driving off. Another explosion, much closer now, rattled the empty avian habitat.

I took a seat on a bench, hearing the war outside the gates.

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Armack
Jan 27, 2006
Doping
(244 words)

Rutger’s victory lasted all of three minutes.

“We think you cheated,” said Judge Wetraus. “Prepare your chaffinch for the blood test.”

The chaffinch, Adonis, strutted around his wooden box, bobbing his slate-colored head and chirping his 1,020th susk-e-wiet. An improbable 1,019 such tweets had earned the bird, and Rutger, first prize in the hour-long Vinkensport Championship. This year’s jackpot: one million francs.

Of course he’d cheated. Since his wife’s passing, Rutger had struggled to provide for himself and his daughter, Margriet. So the listless thirteen-year-old had held the bird, earlier, while Rutger doped it with enough testosterone to guarantee the thing would chirp with gusto.

Faking the test would require the girl’s blood; his would be too rich in testosterone. He hatched a plan and whispered it to Margriet. Leaning close, Rutger noticed her face was thinner than usual. Circles streaked beneath her eyes. Has she stopped eating?

When the veterinarian brought the needle, Margriet held Adonis with two hands: one to slip a clandestine finger underneath the tip, the other to pinch the bird at the critical moment.

A few seconds later, the vet dabbed the blood onto a test strip. It turned blue.

“Well, this is unexpected,” he said. “The bird tests positive for opiates. Still grounds for disqualification.”

Rutger shot Margriet a look loaded with equal parts horror and understanding. “I miss her too.”

He turned to the judges. “Excuse me. I need to spend some time with my daughter.”

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