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Cyrano4747
Sep 25, 2006

Behind every great engineer is someone just hoping the "genius" doesn't bankrupt everyone.



Yeah and had his ID stolen literally a few dozen times

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therobit
Aug 19, 2008


Most of them promise to do all the legwork for you in terms of disputing incorrect credit file info and getting fraudulent accounts closed and resolved. If they actually do that then the service is worth something because that poo poo can take hours. If they are claiming to prevent it from happening then LOL.

Michael Corleone
Mar 30, 2011



My dad has Lifelock, I told him he is dumb but he has NEVER had his identity stolen, so it works. I swear I made this same post in this or another thread like a year ago.

HerStuddMuffin
Aug 10, 2014

YOSPOS


Common scam: passing correlation off as causation.

AlbieQuirky
Oct 9, 2012



therobit posted:

Most of them promise to do all the legwork for you in terms of disputing incorrect credit file info and getting fraudulent accounts closed and resolved. If they actually do that then the service is worth something because that poo poo can take hours. If they are claiming to prevent it from happening then LOL.

Resolution services (or restoration services, as they're sometimes called) might be worth the money. The actual identity theft protection services are pretty much useless (I saw an ad for Experian identity theft prevention on the TV and lol).

Anyway, here's one site's roundup and recommendations on different services.

Michael Corleone
Mar 30, 2011



I don't have Lifelock and have NEVER had my identity stolen, maybe it doesn't work?

mariooncrack
Dec 27, 2008


BiggerBoat posted:

Are things like Lifelock and ID protection services generally scams?

https://www.wired.com/2010/05/lifelock-identity-theft/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qf-xE5aF2Z4

Thanatosian
Apr 16, 2013

Angrier, Bitterer Man


Grimey Drawer

Don Gato posted:

I've already had all my information compromised twice in two massive data leaks over the past couple of years (OPM leak and the Experian leak), I'm just hoping there is some new, more secure ID system before the next leak inevitably hits.

Equifax is going to make a shitload of money off of this breach. They literally have a disincentive from preventing future breaches. Hell, you could probably make an argument that they're legally compelled not to secure themselves from future breaches, because it's not in the best interests of their shareholders, which are the only interests they're supposed to take into consideration.

Thanatosian fucked around with this message at 21:41 on Jan 17, 2018

Proteus Jones
Feb 28, 2013





Just freeze your credit info at each of the credit report places. If you need a loan or car or are applying for credit, find out who they use, lift the freeze and then re-apply it after.

Teriyaki Hairpiece
Dec 29, 2006

Ask me about my dream Frasier episode where Frasier and Bulldog oil their heads and then rub them together. It's definitely not a fetish of mine, I swear!

Michael Corleone posted:

My dad has Lifelock, I told him he is dumb but he has NEVER had his identity stolen, so it works. I swear I made this same post in this or another thread like a year ago.

A real life example of the rock that keeps tigers away.

ToxicSlurpee
Nov 5, 2003

-=SEND HELP=-




Pillbug

Guest2553 posted:

I guess sick kids are just an easy mark.

Sickness in general is an easy mark, especially some of the bizarre poo poo the body does or that medical science can't explain. The human body is massively complex and sometimes poo poo just goes...wrong. Plus the scammier snake oil salesmen talk about things like "not having enough energy" or "suffering from fatigue." You know, simple poo poo we all deal with periodically like upset stomachs, headaches, malaise, that nonsense. Then they blow it up in to "have you ever felt tired and nauseous? YOU ARE LITERALLY DYING OF <insert nasty sounding thing here> AND ONLY <our product> CAN HELP YOU!!!" Then they fill the bullshit with woo, pseudoscience, and "this study one time said that <thing our product may or may not actually contain> might possibly have some sort of slight chance of reducing your possibility of dying of <terrible thing> so if you buy our overpriced supplement full of <chemical somehow related to thing> you'll become invincible!!!"

Plus it doesn't help that some problems just plain aren't curable. Mainstream medicine just isn't perfect and is unlikely to ever be so you get this alt med nonsense that claims it can cure literally everything. It's sad to see people get roped into it because sometimes all they wanted was some sort of hope. Gramps is dying of cancer and the doctor said we can't do anything about it but the chiropractor said if we get his spine twisted around it'll help. Plus this naturopath said that if he chews on this herb 13 hours a day it'll cure it!!! Then when it doesn't they say "well you weren't doing it right." Well...no...you weren't doing medicine right you loving scam artist.

I mean we all deal with illness at some point in our lives. It's a fact of existence but because people don't like being sick you can sell "this will prevent you from getting sick because *bullshit bullshit bullshit*" to the right people. Think about, say, Steve Jobs deciding to treat his cancer by eating a poo poo load of oranges.

Namarrgon
Dec 23, 2008

Congratulations on not getting fit in 2011!

Thanatosian posted:

they're legally compelled not to secure themselves from future breaches, because it's not in the best interests of their shareholders, which are the only interests they're supposed to take into consideration.

This is an urban myth.

Alternatively, you could say it is a fantastic scan that corporations have played on the general population.

Inspector 34
Mar 9, 2009

DOES NOT RESPECT THE RUN

BUT THEY WILL


I think the true value in a service like Lifelock is having someone to point the finger at when your identity does get stolen.

Tubgoat
Jun 30, 2013




Namarrgon posted:

Alternatively, you could say it is a fantastic scan that corporations have played on the general population.
Yeah, capitalism is great.

Watermelon Daiquiri
Jul 10, 2010




My friend recently told me about a situation her ex boyfriend faced: hes a small time drug dealer/user and on occasion prints out :20:s and :10:s to scam his dealer with. Apparently, when he was printing out a :20: or something from a google image search, there was an extra message from 'some government agency' (she doesn't remember which, but if it were legit obviously the secret service?) saying to cease and desist. Another print out, and it said something to the effect of "We know who you are and where you are", and on a third print out it told them the city they were in and described him, my friend and another friend of theirs. I call bullshit on it actually being the government, though, cause why the gently caress would they use the loving printer and not knock on the door especially since they'd have to send someone out to surveil the place, right?

My theory is someone connected to the wifi printer he was using for fun, and used some sort of exploit to see what was printing, saw it was money, and decided to gently caress with them by modifying what the printer spooler had or something.

starkebn
May 18, 2004

"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"


Watermelon Daiquiri posted:

My friend recently told me about a situation her ex boyfriend faced

he said she said

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012

as a person who never leaves my house I have felt covid is the best thing that ever happened to me. But instead of enjoying this, I now spend up to 16 hours a day posting weird fake vaccine news and medical advice on some weird idea I can extend covid and keep pretending I'm a shut in on propose.

No way it was the Secret Service, .

Their MO is to trace counterfeit money to its source and then they show up in person. They take even small quantities seriously.

They donít toy with perps through their printers.

Someone who knows your friendís BF was loving with him.

FrozenVent
May 1, 2009

The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

Drug users getting paranoid and seeing things?

Nah, can't be.

mossyfisk
Nov 8, 2010

FF0000


Image editing software, photocopiers and printers will all tell you to stop if you try to make currency. The rest of the story is likely grown in the retelling.

Stick Insect
Oct 24, 2010

My enemies are many.

My equals are none.


This is one of the ways in which printers and scanners etc. detect that it's money: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/EURion_constellation

goatsestretchgoals
Jun 4, 2011

in soviet russia, you shove robot

Watermelon Daiquiri posted:

My friend recently told me about a situation her ex boyfriend faced: hes a small time drug dealer/user and on occasion prints out :20:s and :10:s to scam his dealer with. Apparently, when he was printing out a :20: or something from a google image search, there was an extra message from 'some government agency' (she doesn't remember which, but if it were legit obviously the secret service?) saying to cease and desist. Another print out, and it said something to the effect of "We know who you are and where you are", and on a third print out it told them the city they were in and described him, my friend and another friend of theirs. I call bullshit on it actually being the government, though, cause why the gently caress would they use the loving printer and not knock on the door especially since they'd have to send someone out to surveil the place, right?

My theory is someone connected to the wifi printer he was using for fun, and used some sort of exploit to see what was printing, saw it was money, and decided to gently caress with them by modifying what the printer spooler had or something.

or your idiot friend clicked on the first link for 'counterfeit 20s lol'

E: ^ EURion is a thing, but not this thing

Cyrano4747
Sep 25, 2006

Behind every great engineer is someone just hoping the "genius" doesn't bankrupt everyone.



Man, my take away from that story wasn't "your friend was an idiot for being a bad counterfeiter" but "your friend was an idiot for passing off fake cash to drug dealers."

goatsestretchgoals
Jun 4, 2011

in soviet russia, you shove robot

Gonna split this off into it's own post.

I used to work for a place that cleaned computers from virii etc for money by walking them through installing our VNC fork. Basically grandma clicked the wrong link then called us.

I worked there when everyone and their Eastern European brother was using Cryptolocker as payload. Most of the time, it was hilarious ('Attention: The FBI has been notified that <webcam output> is looking at the pornos, send a prepaid to <extremely foreign address>.') Sometimes the threat would even claim they were looking at child porn. This is fine, your files are loving gone but if you're stupid enough to pay my company $100+ to probably not get all the malware out, that's cool.

The most hosed up variant actually downloaded child porn and displayed that as 'hey look what you did'. Our policy was to nope the gently caress out, except not every computer with symptoms was actually infected with a file encrypting virus, and our standard process when confronted by 'LOL look what U did!!!!' on boot was to hold power button and then mash F8 until Safe Mode with Networking. Cue a much younger goatsestretchgoals remoting into a customer computer and being confronted with...something disturbing.

therobit
Aug 19, 2008


Cyrano4747 posted:

Man, my take away from that story wasn't "your friend was an idiot for being a bad counterfeiter" but "your friend was an idiot for passing off fake cash to drug dealers."

Yeah holy poo poo. Addicts do some really dumb poo poo when they are chasing the dragon.

BiggerBoat
Sep 26, 2007

I'm sorry, everyone.

goatsestretchgoals posted:

Gonna split this off into it's own post.

I used to work for a place that cleaned computers from virii etc for money by walking them through installing our VNC fork. Basically grandma clicked the wrong link then called us.

I worked there when everyone and their Eastern European brother was using Cryptolocker as payload. Most of the time, it was hilarious ('Attention: The FBI has been notified that <webcam output> is looking at the pornos, send a prepaid to <extremely foreign address>.') Sometimes the threat would even claim they were looking at child porn. This is fine, your files are loving gone but if you're stupid enough to pay my company $100+ to probably not get all the malware out, that's cool.

The most hosed up variant actually downloaded child porn and displayed that as 'hey look what you did'. Our policy was to nope the gently caress out, except not every computer with symptoms was actually infected with a file encrypting virus, and our standard process when confronted by 'LOL look what U did!!!!' on boot was to hold power button and then mash F8 until Safe Mode with Networking. Cue a much younger goatsestretchgoals remoting into a customer computer and being confronted with...something disturbing.

This poo poo happened to me.

It certainly wasn't child porn but I got the "FBI is coming for you" pop up during a normal FAP session and the browser basically froze. A hard reboot and a malware scan took care of it but I won't lie. poo poo stopped me in my tracks for a brief moment. Not that I thought I'd get locked up but more worrying about WTF I'd done to my cpu.

There are porn sites that have Traci Lords scenes for instance and you never loving know. But I think this poo poo plays more off the "Oh, poo poo. My wife and family will find my jacking habits" on a shared laptop and genuine ignorance about how to remove the malware more than any real belief that the feds are coming to arrest you.

EL BROMANCE
Jun 10, 2006

COWABUNGA DUDES!



Let me tell you about the time I was still a teen, downloading a bunch of poo poo like you do, and at 2am a police riot van turns up outside my house with its lights flashing.

Turns out a friend from a fairly concerned and affluent enough family hadnít gone home after some surgery, and his parents got the wrong kid he mentioned he was hanging out with that day.

Watermelon Daiquiri
Jul 10, 2010




therobit posted:

Yeah holy poo poo. Addicts do some really dumb poo poo when they are chasing the dragon.

Yep. My friend broke up with the guy, thank loving god, cause he was bad loving news all the way. She said she was there for it, though, and -says- it wasn't a dream lol

stringball
Mar 17, 2009



Anyone who has handled even a moderate amount of cash should be instantly able to tell that a bill (probably printed on standard computer paper in this case) isn't legit just by holding it up to the light

Unless the drug dealer is as dumb as them I'm pretty sure he could spot the bill from a mile away, and he should be able to close his eyes and feel the fake one easily

therobit
Aug 19, 2008


stringball posted:

Anyone who has handled even a moderate amount of cash should be instantly able to tell that a bill (probably printed on standard computer paper in this case) isn't legit just by holding it up to the light

Unless the drug dealer is as dumb as them I'm pretty sure he could spot the bill from a mile away, and he should be able to close his eyes and feel the fake one easily

Yeah anyone who handles lots of cash can tell without looking. If they crumple it up enough that you can't, you give that bill a second look. Unless the distributor is on his first day on the job, he knows what to look for because someone has already tried it and whoever he works for is probably not very tolerant of those types ofmistakes.

Tubgoat
Jun 30, 2013




The "Campaign for the Environment" jobs get mentioned yet? They have legions of 16-35 year olds collect money and signatures from folks, ostensibly for environmental causes, which then go to... paying organisers to get people to collect more money? I'm not sure where the environment comes into play. There's always a quota to reach, as if we could EVER bribe politicians more than oil etc companies.

In America, presumably higher concentrations around urban population centres.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012

as a person who never leaves my house I have felt covid is the best thing that ever happened to me. But instead of enjoying this, I now spend up to 16 hours a day posting weird fake vaccine news and medical advice on some weird idea I can extend covid and keep pretending I'm a shut in on propose.

Should I help defraud the U.S. federal government. Whatís the worst that could happen?

https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/7rzw8v/i_went_in_for_a_job_interview_and_it_escalated/

quote:

Some background info. I have little business knowledge, and I am a OEF Disabled Army Veteran. I live in the U.S., specifically Illinois.
I answered an ad on Craigslist.com, looking for 'a disabled vet to do light office work.' I got in contact with the employer, who is a business owner. He instructed me to drive an hour away to take a look at their operation. They have a factory where they fabricate small metal parts and build shipping crates. The guy at the factory, the nephew of the owner was an engineer by trade, and was running the operations at the factory. He seemed like a decent fellow. He seemed to be vetting me for the position.
I was deemed worthy, and the guy gave me the address to the employers house, which was near my home. I drive to the house, and knock on the door. The house was very nice, and would be considered a mansion by anyone's standards. I guess he was proving to me that he was successful. The man greets me, and then serves me water and some Indian treats. We start talking about the business. He then explains to me what they really wanted me to do. He wants me to take over 51% of a corporation that would, basically, be a "middle man" for him to sell his shipping crates to the US Government and Military. He explained that there is a government program called the Service Disabled Veterans Small Business Owners Program (SDVSBOP) which grants disabled veterans government contracts. The government has a quota to meet with so many contracts given to disabled veterans which are not being met. So, I would be improving my financial situation, and he would get contracts for his business. It seems like a win-win scenario. He and his other employee seemed to genuinely care about taking care of a veteran, but I am very, very skeptical. A craigslist ad that turns into me owning a majority of a company just seems like a scam. Does anyone else have any information they can offer about this situation? How should I proceed? Has anyone ever heard about something like this happening? How did it turn out? If I am going to get screwed by this, then how will that happen? I am sorry if I do not have more specifics on the matter. I will try to answer any questions you have for me.
It was a very enticing offer, but I am trying to do my due diligence.

Proteus Jones
Feb 28, 2013





Platystemon posted:

Should I help defraud the U.S. federal government. Whatís the worst that could happen?

https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/7rzw8v/i_went_in_for_a_job_interview_and_it_escalated/



He keeps talking himself into "well, maybe this one is legit"

MightyJoe36
Dec 29, 2013

Cat Army


Here's a good article to read before you get the next call from a recruiter who sounds like he's calling you from a call center in India:

quote:

As competition for jobs among Indiaís youth intensifies, the offer of a lucrative career in a call centre can be difficult to turn down Ė even if the work turns out to be operating a scam.

https://www.theguardian.com/news/2018/jan/02/the-scammers-gaming-indias-overcrowded-job-market

Phyzzle
Jan 26, 2008


Platystemon posted:

Should I help defraud the U.S. federal government. Whatís the worst that could happen?

https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/7rzw8v/i_went_in_for_a_job_interview_and_it_escalated/

Huh. It may go against the spirit of the regulations, but if it's technically fulfilling the requirements for a contract, then the his little corporation would be as 'legit' as any number of private contractors for the military.

Yuran M. Bazil
Jun 20, 2008



therobit posted:

Yeah anyone who handles lots of cash can tell without looking. If they crumple it up enough that you can't, you give that bill a second look. Unless the distributor is on his first day on the job, he knows what to look for because someone has already tried it and whoever he works for is probably not very tolerant of those types ofmistakes.

I tried to buy weed with a fake note once (i didn't print it out myself or some poo poo, someone paid at my parents business with it, we didn't realise it was fake until i tried to use it somewhere else). Can confirm that my dealer called me back about ten minutes later all "Yeah man I can tell this is fake you know". TBF he didnt stab me and he even gave me the fake note back for a real one so it went quite well considering

EL BROMANCE
Jun 10, 2006

COWABUNGA DUDES!



You can almost guarantee that a drug dealer is going to be better at spotting a fake than most cashiers.

Also it's probably best not to try copy a plan detailed on both Beavis and Butthead, and by the junkies in the first season of The Wire.

Thanatosian
Apr 16, 2013

Angrier, Bitterer Man


Grimey Drawer

Yuran M. Bazil posted:

I tried to buy weed with a fake note once (i didn't print it out myself or some poo poo, someone paid at my parents business with it, we didn't realise it was fake until i tried to use it somewhere else). Can confirm that my dealer called me back about ten minutes later all "Yeah man I can tell this is fake you know". TBF he didnt stab me and he even gave me the fake note back for a real one so it went quite well considering

While there may be some overlap, "weed dealer" and "drug dealer" are generally two very different things.

BiggerBoat
Sep 26, 2007

I'm sorry, everyone.

Thanatosian posted:

While there may be some overlap, "weed dealer" and "drug dealer" are generally two very different things.

Can confirm.

therobit
Aug 19, 2008


In Oregon "weed dealer" can mean a store in a strip mall.

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EL BROMANCE
Jun 10, 2006

COWABUNGA DUDES!



I've noticed whenever a big concert is announced, immediately there are tickets up on StubHub for silly money in specific blocks/rows. Anyone know the specifics of what I'm sure is a scam? They're before any pre-sale so the only way I can see them being legit is if they're employees of the venue or similar who know they have allocations in certain places. Buying from Ticketmaster is such an rear end, it's not as if they can even rush in at the beginning of a pre-sale and buy these specific seats, as you get offered tickets rather than choose them. Doesn't StubHub require you to even upload the tickets/proof before listing even these days?

It's quite fun snagging seats straight away and looking at the ludicrous prices people set for the same block, mind.

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