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Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

Prurient Squid posted:

Mr Spock is ordered to serve as a bodyguard for a vulcan woman who has really big boobs. And the whole time he's trying to be logical and not think about a boobs but the more he tries to supress it the more powerful it becomes and he keeps making slip ups.

edit:

And her name is T'Its Apopin'

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the two

I mean one

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Karate Bastard

There exists a server somewhere with all your shitposts on it.

Karate Bastard

That wasn't a joke but lmao at the concept

Shifty Nipples

shitposts are stored in the cloud


Thanks Plant MONSTER. and deep dish peat moss and deep dish peat moss and deep dish peat moss

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
1950s New York City.

A guy with a nervous disposition is visiting a specialst on worry. The guy is dressed smartly and has a chipper demeanor.

He starts walking around the room giving an impomptu lecture on worry and all the distress and diseases it can cause and the guy in the chair is getting more and more worked up.
Then he turns around and the man's dead!

Karate Bastard

Man, one simple switchup at the pumps gets you yelled at by a wet Spanish bastard, who is he anyway?

HYDROCABRON

The Voice of Labor
Probation
Can't post for 3 hours!
dude's rear end hairs grow so long that, in the middle of the night, his turds throw them over the side of the bed and climb down like a reverse crapunzel

Finger Prince


The Voice of Labor posted:

dude's rear end hairs grow so long that, in the middle of the night, his turds throw them over the side of the bed and climb down like a reverse crapunzel

While dance of the sugar plum fairy plays in the background.

google THIS

Please don't doxx me

canyoneer


I only have canyoneyes for you


Sonny Corleone ambushed at a toll booth, getting absolutely buried in quarters flung by gangsters shooting quarters out of automatic "Georgie guns"

Viginti Septem

Oculus Noctuae

canyoneer posted:



Sonny Corleone ambushed at a toll booth, getting absolutely buried in quarters flung by gangsters shooting quarters out of automatic "Georgie guns"

That's a surefire way to get murdered by police

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
I supervillain who choose to be evil as a child and now they're stuck with a really stupid character motivation.

The Voice of Labor
Probation
Can't post for 3 hours!
communist auto racing wherein engineering/fabrication/driver teams compete to produce the most fuel efficient, reliable and cost effective vehicles

baka of lathspell

just started my day, tbh early sleeping is nice

wake up & get baked up


join dork order
sig by ??? (<3 u)

Karate Bastard

The Voice of Labor posted:

communist auto racing wherein engineering/fabrication/driver teams compete to produce the most fuel efficient, reliable and cost effective vehicles

I think something like this actually exists already? Like I think the premise is to get your vehicle as far as possible with only a quart of gas or something?

Karate Bastard

gently caress YEAH, FASTIDIOUS DUDE!!!!! OMFG ABSOLUTELY FRUGAL

*carefully toasts with runners-up in recycled rain water*

Karate Bastard fucked around with this message at 11:32 on Dec 15, 2022

WithoutTheFezOn
Oh no

Karate Bastard posted:

I think something like this actually exists already? Like I think the premise is to get your vehicle as far as possible with only a quart of gas or something?
About 12 years ago this was called “hypermiling”..

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
A hot baby in a cool shirt.

Trying

Hard Sci Fi where it's Sci Fi concepts but delivered in a cockney accent

Wha' if... consciousness is an illusion? You slag?

The Voice of Labor
Probation
Can't post for 3 hours!
a capitalist getting therapy because they're all sad that because of child labor laws they only made 3.3 billion last year instead of an even 4 billion

Trying

Phones, right? But too bleddy much

canyoneer


I only have canyoneyes for you
baby it's cold outside sung as a duet trying to convince han solo to not go out on a tauntaun looking for luke

The Voice of Labor
Probation
Can't post for 3 hours!
zombie disco!

the zombeegees, stayin' dead

taana gravedigger, no heartbeat

gloria gravenoir, I did not survive

dead stewart, if you want my dead body

The Voice of Labor
Probation
Can't post for 3 hours!
a thug fires his revolver at superman, six shots bounce of his chest. the thug throws his gun at superman, hits him square in the balls. superman keels over in pain

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
Rigging an election by raising the dead.

Must contain the line. "Golly, he's a necromancer. And a gerrymanderer to boot!".

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
An argument on the internet with people arguing at cross purposes due to different interpretations of the meaning of the word "inflation". (one being economic, the other being porn)

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
Love potion number nein.

A man brews a love potion to win the girl of his dreams but things go awry when due to a series of comedic mishaps, the poition is drunk by adolp hitler, the leader of the third reich.

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
A Star Wars film from the point of view of a neutral satirist who criticises the Empire and the Rebellion equally.

Buttchocks

No, I like my hat, thanks.

Prurient Squid posted:

An argument on the internet with people arguing at cross purposes due to different interpretations of the meaning of the word "inflation". (one being economic, the other being porn)

I said today's youth are inflation-poor.

baka of lathspell

The Voice of Labor posted:

a thug fires his revolver at superman, six shots bounce of his chest. the thug throws his gun at superman, hits him square in the balls. superman keels over in pain

lol


join dork order
sig by ??? (<3 u)

canyoneer


I only have canyoneyes for you

Prurient Squid posted:

A Star Wars film from the point of view of a neutral satirist who criticises the Empire and the Rebellion equally.

i saw this book in a bookstore last week and the shakespeare gag is pretty funny
https://theroarbots.com/william-shakespeares-empire-striketh-back/

Drink-Mix Man

You are an odd fellow, but I must say... you throw a swell shindig.

The Voice of Labor posted:

a thug fires his revolver at superman, six shots bounce of his chest. the thug throws his gun at superman, hits him square in the balls. superman keels over in pain

Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
A judge bangs his gavel "the law does not concern itself with trifles"

Pulls out an enormous delicious looking sponge cake "except this!"

Karate Bastard

People of cringe.

Buttchocks

No, I like my hat, thanks.

Prurient Squid posted:

A judge bangs his gavel "the law does not concern itself with trifles"

Pulls out an enormous delicious looking sponge cake "except this!"

United States v. 692 trifles

Prof. Crocodile

Reaching out to my nephews after 30 years and apologizing for the embarrassment that i must have caused them by making empty promises and spreading unsubstantiated gossip while working at Nintendo.

Youremother

MORT

Buttchocks posted:

United States v. 692 trifles

(Lawyer quickly wiping crumbs off of his mouth with his tie) Umm... six hundred and ninety one, actually!

The Voice of Labor
Probation
Can't post for 3 hours!
an apple falls on newton's head. newton has an idea. newton's idea is to beat the poo poo out of the apple in retaliation for falling on his head

*newton beats up the apple, apple chunks and juices land on his face during the pummeling*

newton has another idea

*newton eating apple sauce*

The Voice of Labor
Probation
Can't post for 3 hours!
they say that no man is an island yet here I am in the bath with lilliputians driving tiny little right hand drive vehicles around my belly

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Prurient Squid

Tiddy cat Buddha improving your day.
A streamer plays an RPG for once and opens a chest but it's actually a mimic.

[closes window]
"No way man! I don't play games with jump scares man! That's messed up."

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