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Ciaphas
Nov 20, 2005

> BEWARE, COWARD :ovr:


heh, career growth

's funny

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Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde
- take Ada out of that first bullet point. It's too prominent and you will be slotted as an Ada dev which is a dead end. Likewise say "legacy Unix" instead of Solaris
- nobody looks for csh as a skill and "et al" is nonsense
- you have Linux & RHEL exp but you don't list it as a skill. Don't identify the version of RHEL you worked with.
- take Roslyn out of the skills list, just say C# and .NET
- the top row of the skill table is hottest, then the lower middle columns, and the lower corners are cold. Place your skills accordingly and equalize the column widths.

you have been working in the type of organization that does not follow IT fashion trends, which is a handicap

Gazpacho fucked around with this message at 20:56 on Nov 19, 2018

Nomnom Cookie
Aug 30, 2009



rewrote my resume recently and went from ~10% response rate to ~60%. all that changed was the wording and how heavily i highlighted the cool stuff. it matters, a lot

i had to read your resume three times to start to understand it. i would not try so hard if i was working

if you hold TS/SCI then i dont see any reason not to put that on every resume you send cause it sounds impressive. aiui airgap is standard in that kind of work so doesn't need to be called out--employers who care will expect you to know whats up

write about cool stuff imo. doesn't matter if it was two weeks five years ago. you're badass, make sure the resume shows that you're badass

Ciaphas
Nov 20, 2005

> BEWARE, COWARD :ovr:


badass things that if they existed (they don’t ), I could only refer to so obliquely that they may as well not exist, yes, due to aforesaid TS SCI

formatting concerns are noted but for content I’m frankly stuck

Ciaphas
Nov 20, 2005

> BEWARE, COWARD :ovr:


I dwell on that fact a lot, tbh

eta sigh, i'm sorry, i don't mean to keep replying to everyone's good advice with self-loathing and defeatism. just kinda dispirited rn. i'll apply what i can tomorrow and try again

Ciaphas fucked around with this message at 00:23 on Nov 20, 2018

elite_garbage_man
Apr 3, 2010
I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

Kevin Mitnick P.E. posted:

rewrote my resume recently and went from ~10% response rate to ~60%. all that changed was the wording and how heavily i highlighted the cool stuff. it matters, a lot

i had to read your resume three times to start to understand it. i would not try so hard if i was working

if you hold TS/SCI then i dont see any reason not to put that on every resume you send cause it sounds impressive. aiui airgap is standard in that kind of work so doesn't need to be called out--employers who care will expect you to know whats up

write about cool stuff imo. doesn't matter if it was two weeks five years ago. you're badass, make sure the resume shows that you're badass

oi fellow defense bud

I've been leaving my clearance off since I don't want to do defense work at the time, but has it putting it in your resume been getting the attention of all the goofy big name tech companies?

Nomnom Cookie
Aug 30, 2009



sorry i just have family in the MIC and considered applying myself when in college

Nomnom Cookie
Aug 30, 2009



what gets me attention from big name tech companies is lots of java and aws experience and having a white male name

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde
jss: added another occurrence of Java and JavaScript on my resume because each is on there 7 times already and a recruiter told me today that she couldn't tell that I have Java exp

Nomnom Cookie
Aug 30, 2009



Kevin Mitnick P.E. posted:

what gets me attention from big name tech companies is lots of java and aws experience and having a white male name

guess now that dod is going with aws im gonna start getting recruiters on linkedin looking for someone to autoscale the drone backend based on # of browns detected in the AO

TheFluff
Dec 13, 2006

FRIENDS, LISTEN TO ME
I AM A SEAGULL
OF WEALTH AND TASTE

Gazpacho posted:

jss: added another occurrence of Java and JavaScript on my resume because each is on there 7 times already and a recruiter told me today that she couldn't tell that I have Java exp

The thing about resumes is that before the first interview nobody ever reads anything more than the first 3-5 lines. If you don't have a blurb at the top that says SEASONED JAVA VETERAN; 7 YEARS EXPERIENCE, recruiters and HR departments will think you don't fit their profile. The blurb should match what's in the job description pretty closely (but not so close it's apparent that you just copied it). If the first blurb doesn't sell you, your resume goes straight into the trash. They have hundreds of resumes to check and 75% of them are from people with no relevant experience, not that the ones doing the first resume screening understands what the job entails.

The rest of the resume only really becomes relevant when it's time for the first interview or phone screen - about 5-10 minutes before that whoever is interviewing (usually not an engineer the first time) will glance through it and try to come up with some questions to ask you about your experience.

That's what they taught me in consulting, at any rate. They were quite good at making you sell yourself.

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde
it was there. twice :shrug:



the weird grammar reflects some search optimization that I had a consultant do 6 years ago and have left mostly intact

mind you in this case I specifically know that the recruiter looked at the bottom of page 2 to see my irrelevant experience there

Gazpacho fucked around with this message at 07:52 on Nov 20, 2018

TheFluff
Dec 13, 2006

FRIENDS, LISTEN TO ME
I AM A SEAGULL
OF WEALTH AND TASTE
we;lp :smith:

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


my company is hiring again and i reposted our listing in the sh/sc job thread if anyone is interested

EnergizerFellow
Oct 11, 2005

More drunk than a barrel of monkeys

Gazpacho posted:

it was there. twice :shrug:



the weird grammar reflects some search optimization that I had a consultant do 6 years ago and have left mostly intact

mind you in this case I specifically know that the recruiter looked at the bottom of page 2 to see my irrelevant experience there

i got a cc copy some recruiter sent to the internal guys where they bumped up the font size, bolded, and yellow highlighted a bunch of stuff on my resume. it was a crazy mess to look at.

Bloody
Mar 3, 2013

if your resume can't handle a dozen passes through nightmare transformations then your formatting is too complex

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


EnergizerFellow posted:

i got a cc copy some recruiter sent to the internal guys where they bumped up the font size, bolded, and yellow highlighted a bunch of stuff on my resume. it was a crazy mess to look at.

lol at trusting a recruiter with a .docx

only send out .pdfs

Ciaphas
Nov 20, 2005

> BEWARE, COWARD :ovr:


an hour of staring and thinking later and my resume looks maybe barely a little better, but only by doing the next closest thing to straight up lying and adding "java" and "javascript" to the "skills" table (and making C++ and C# / .NET more obvious, thanks for that)

only touched each for work for less than about ten minutes each, and have zero interest in working with either (ed: let's be clear i'll take what i can get); but i'm out of ideas for resume improvement i can actually accomplish, even if i stretch the "shut the gently caress up" TS rule to its limit

(ed) coincidental: recruiter called shortly after my flipout yesterday, not with any jobs but just to touch base and to report in on the market (poor, without the word 'java' in there somewhere at least) and ask if i could add any buzzwords to my resume

Ciaphas fucked around with this message at 16:28 on Nov 20, 2018

qhat
Jul 6, 2015


Rex-Goliath posted:

lol at trusting a recruiter with a .docx

only send out .pdfs

Pretty sure they can just gently caress around with it in Adobe acrobat anyway

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


sure but then at least then they have to try

Ciaphas
Nov 20, 2005

> BEWARE, COWARD :ovr:


one of the screenings that i had high confidence in a few weeks ago, t-mobile, ghosted me, and unfortunately i only remembered this morning that i hadn't heard anything yet

asked for an update before i realized it was totally pointless, and sure enough, a reply saying I was turned down and a reply sent two weeks ago (i'm sure they did) just arrived

distortion park
Apr 25, 2011


Rex-Goliath posted:

lol at trusting a recruiter with a .docx

only send out .pdfs

They copy and paste into word if you do that

Bloody
Mar 3, 2013

Rex-Goliath posted:

lol at trusting a recruiter with a .docx

only send out .pdfs

lol if you think that stops them

Jimmy Carter
Nov 3, 2005

THIS MOTHERDUCKER
FLIES IN STYLE
like a month in and my manager emailed me going ‘okay here’s the map of how our company does salary tiers let’s make a game plan for getting you bumped up a level’ which is rad, and followed up with an email to our team that he wanted to make sure all our email auto-responders specifically say we aren’t responding to anyone during the break and if it’s truly an emergency to call upper management instead.

I am now feeling less bad about slumming it for years because this is actually a good work environment. It also helps that a friend texted me this morning about how they are probably quitting since their CTO is cost-cutting and switching over to C# + React Native.

Fiedler
Jun 29, 2002

I, for one, welcome our new mouse overlords.

Gazpacho posted:

it was there. twice :shrug:



the weird grammar reflects some search optimization that I had a consultant do 6 years ago and have left mostly intact

mind you in this case I specifically know that the recruiter looked at the bottom of page 2 to see my irrelevant experience there

Consider making "Java, C# and JavaScript programmer with N years experience" the first sentence of that summary.

Bloody
Mar 3, 2013

Gazpacho posted:

it was there. twice :shrug:



the weird grammar reflects some search optimization that I had a consultant do 6 years ago and have left mostly intact

mind you in this case I specifically know that the recruiter looked at the bottom of page 2 to see my irrelevant experience there

god thats a lotta words i would never ever read

PIZZA.BAT
Nov 12, 2016


:cheers:


Jimmy Carter posted:

like a month in and my manager emailed me going ‘okay here’s the map of how our company does salary tiers let’s make a game plan for getting you bumped up a level’ which is rad, and followed up with an email to our team that he wanted to make sure all our email auto-responders specifically say we aren’t responding to anyone during the break and if it’s truly an emergency to call upper management instead.

I am now feeling less bad about slumming it for years because this is actually a good work environment. It also helps that a friend texted me this morning about how they are probably quitting since their CTO is cost-cutting and switching over to C# + React Native.

i heard that there's a promised land out there where they actually disable your accounts entirely when you're on pto so you can't check your email even if you wanted to

i think a yosposter worked there but i forget the details

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde

Bloody posted:

god thats a lotta words i would never ever read

theyre not for you to read, theyre for computer

Schadenboner
Aug 15, 2011

by Shine

Achmed Jones posted:

pullover hoodies 👎

zipup hoodies 😻

:yeah:

my homie dhall
Dec 9, 2010

honey, oh please, it's just a machine
i’ve a new job

and one of my TLs is a goon!!

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde
Don't come to the bay to do web work if you don't have Spring Butt or React experience. It's literally impossible.

The MUMPSorceress
Jan 6, 2012


^SHTPSTS

Gary’s Answer

Ploft-shell crab posted:

i’ve a new job

and one of my TLs is a goon!!

run

Pie Colony
Dec 8, 2006
I AM SUCH A FUCKUP THAT I CAN'T EVEN POST IN AN E/N THREAD I STARTED

quote:

Don't come to the bay

quote:

Don't do web work

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde
supposing somehow i get a job where I can learn React, by the time I want to leave the job every recruiter will be telling me to gently caress off because it's not React NG. recruiting is garbage, to me

DELETE CASCADE
Oct 25, 2017

i haven't washed my penis since i jerked it to a phtotograph of george w. bush in 2003
read some react tutorials and practice interview questions, say you know it, get job, learn at job

that's what everyone else does

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde
they'll ask me what I did with it at previous jobs. I can only tell small lies, not big ones.

Notorious b.s.d.
Jan 25, 2003

by Reene

Gazpacho posted:

- take Ada out of that first bullet point. It's too prominent and you will be slotted as an Ada dev which is a dead end. Likewise say "legacy Unix" instead of Solaris

terrible advice -- you should include both "legacy unix" and "solaris" because you want to appear in keyword searches for both.

Gazpacho posted:

- nobody looks for csh as a skill and "et al" is nonsense
- take Roslyn out of the skills list, just say C# and .NET

these are good advice

Gazpacho posted:

- the top row of the skill table is hottest, then the lower middle columns, and the lower corners are cold. Place your skills accordingly and equalize the column widths.

no human reader is going to look at the skills section. it's just for keyword searches

Gazpacho
Jun 18, 2004

by Fluffdaddy
Slippery Tilde

Notorious b.s.d. posted:

terrible advice -- you should include both "legacy unix" and "solaris" because you want to appear in keyword searches for both.
no, encouraging people to hire you for the dead technologies you know is career suicide

Notorious b.s.d.
Jan 25, 2003

by Reene
your resume has three audiences and you don't know who of the three will read it

  1. automated systems

    in 2018, every company, even startups and many small businesses, has an applicant management system

    the AMS is gonna pick resumes based on buzzwords. modern AMS resume parsers are smart enough to clock whether the items in your "skills" section appear in body text.

    so write a resume with a lot of buzzwords, and make sure buzzwords appear in both the "skills" section and the body text, to satisfy the AMS

  2. recruiters and HR

    these people are even dumber than the automated system. they have no idea what they're looking at. they want to see a relevant job title at your last two jobs, and some relevant buzzwords, so it comes up in their keyword search

    if your formal job title at work is stupid and useless, make up a more useful human-readable job title. it is ok to turn "PROGRAMMER/ANALYST III" into "senior systems analyst" -- it's not fraud, just, a human-readable title that is actually helpful to employers

  3. hiring managers

    hopefully these folks will actually read some of the body text. they ain't never gonna make it to a second page. they ain't never gonna read your "goal statement" or your "skills."

    you want to provide enough body text to give them something to ask you about on the phone and in interviews. your bullet points will be literally half the topics of discussion on the phone and in interviews, so, you know, make sure you have cool and good things to say about yourself and your prior employers

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The MUMPSorceress
Jan 6, 2012


^SHTPSTS

Gary’s Answer

Gazpacho posted:

no, encouraging people to hire you for the dead technologies you know is career suicide

any job is better for ciaphas than what's going on now. he should maximize his opportunity to get anything. who gives a gently caress if its with legacy systems?

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