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"never heard of json" "i have used json" "i have an opinion on json's dipshit date/time handling" "i wrote a json parser" "i wrote a json parser that other people actually use" "i wrote a json parser that you've used"
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Dec 10, 2018 21:51
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if you do something with a technology more interesting than "use it" it should probably be called out separately somewhere else (e.g. under jobs or personal projects)
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Dec 10, 2018 21:54
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Within the past two weeks I had a recruiter looking for someone with 5 years JSON experience Recruiters are so dumb, so very very dumb PS: “Microservice Technologies” in the summary is a creative way of saying “Docker”. Other than that, which items in the summary don’t mean anything to a screener? Gazpacho fucked around with this message at 22:32 on Dec 10, 2018 |
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Dec 10, 2018 22:21
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I think I’ve discovered the bottom of the MSP market and I think I’m now working at it? 
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Dec 10, 2018 22:52
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did they say they have a real "startup feel"?
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Dec 10, 2018 23:00
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i’m the box of toner that at first pass looks like a case of beer
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Dec 10, 2018 23:51
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Gazpacho posted:Within the past two weeks I had a recruiter looking for someone with 5 years JSON experience Maybe instead you should say "docker". Microservice tech could mean literally anything. Just like 'cloud technologies', it could mean anything from architecting a complex AWS infrastructure to writing a dogshit node server for serving your company's blog that nobody reads anyway.
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Dec 11, 2018 01:08
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at some point I have to bluff what recruiters want to see, and they want to see microservices. they don't know that docker is for microservices, they don't know what individual AWS services are, and they don't understand that nobody makes a microservice, until one day they do
Gazpacho fucked around with this message at 02:33 on Dec 11, 2018 |
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Dec 11, 2018 02:30
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i think your goony disdain for the people you're trying to impress is palpable in your resume so you should probably get somebody else to help you write the copy instead of trusting your gut man
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Dec 11, 2018 02:35
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guess what happened last time I got someone else to write the resume copy (hint: I posted it)
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Dec 11, 2018 02:58
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find a better person to write, then so you're like the 40-year-old 3-martini mad man trying to sell to the 30-35 female housewife demo and you're wondering if these 30-35 female housewives are loving morons and david oglivy has to come around and tell you the customer isn't a moron, she's your wife
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Dec 11, 2018 03:06
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it's a shame all these interview processes railroad The One True Resume thru the entire length of the process without chance of deviation like imagine if at some point you talked to a hiring manager and could say "ahaha oh that's just SEO to get past HR, here's a simpler tech-focused one for you and your team" too bad no humans exist, anywhere, and it's all robots
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Dec 11, 2018 03:21
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ShadowHawk posted:Is there some obscure page layout setting you can do to set a PDF to use extremely large unprintable per page paper settings? some PDF software would by default pass A4s directly to the printer, which the printer would refuse to print until A4 was loaded
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Dec 11, 2018 03:41
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JawnV6 posted:it's a shame all these interview processes railroad The One True Resume thru the entire length of the process without chance of deviation on the other hand, humans are easily the worst part of dev
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Dec 11, 2018 04:00
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Schadenboner posted:I think I’ve discovered the bottom of the MSP market and I think I’m now working at it? this is every msp it is a dying niche with low margins
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Dec 11, 2018 04:37
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theres companies that make a fuckload reselling aws calling themselves msp. dont ask me how
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Dec 11, 2018 04:44
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qhat posted:Maybe instead you should say "docker". Microservice tech could mean literally anything. Just like 'cloud technologies', it could mean anything from architecting a complex AWS infrastructure to writing a dogshit node server for serving your company's blog that nobody reads anyway. having worked for a company that ostensibly provides tooling to help other software shops migrate to microservices, i can confidently say that nobody understands what they are beyond a buzzword for companies to think they're on the cutting edge of systems design. the marketing team loves it!
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Dec 11, 2018 07:32
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Kevin Mitnick P.E. posted:theres companies that make a fuckload reselling aws calling themselves msp. dont ask me how it’s about an 8% rebate, not that exciting. you can then make another 15 to 30% on managed services azure has better rebates which is why their growth is bonkers at the moment - they have thousands of small MSPs vacuuming up peoples two host VMware clusters into ~the cloud~
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Dec 11, 2018 07:39
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My facade of knowing what I'm doing continues to hold up. My boss trusts me to interview 3 different candidates tomorrow despite being a small boy and having never interviewed anyone before.
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Dec 11, 2018 16:58
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Notorious b.s.d. posted:this is every msp They don’t even have coffee here. 
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Dec 11, 2018 17:04
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i was at a place that didnt have coffee because everyone was a huge fuckin health nut before i bought red bulls by the case and kept them in the fridge
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Dec 11, 2018 17:05
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Schadenboner posted:They don’t even have coffee here. Hello are you interested in software engineering opportunities in the Milwaukee area
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Dec 11, 2018 17:06
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So I think I have adequately updated my resume thanks to MononcQc. I'm not sure if I should include the trucking company because it's not relevant at all to CS work but it also fills in what the hell I've been doing since high school minus all the waiting and bouncing jobs on the side as well. I don't know if I should have the ellipses with skills because honestly anything else is stuff I've touched once or twice and can't answer anything about. Please rip it apart.  Edit: MononncQc i am buying your book on friday
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Dec 11, 2018 18:23
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ThePeavstenator posted:Hello are you interested in software engineering opportunities in the Milwaukee area 
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Dec 11, 2018 18:28
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Nobody gives a gently caress what you've been doing since high school, if you had left the trucking job off it would have looked like you went straight from high school to college to employment. Instead now you invite questions about why you didn't do the normie 4-5 years of college after high school
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Dec 11, 2018 18:32
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dragon enthusiast posted:Nobody gives a gently caress what you've been doing since high school, if you had left the trucking job off it would have looked like you went straight from high school to college to employment. Instead now you invite questions about why you didn't do the normie 4-5 years of college after high school Wouldn't being 32 invite those questions anyway?
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Dec 11, 2018 18:42
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KidDynamite posted:Wouldn't being 32 invite those questions anyway? Maybe but also only after they have seen you in person, when you can give an explanation rather than making arbitrary, unaccountable judgements based on a piece of paper
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Dec 11, 2018 18:46
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KidDynamite posted:Wouldn't being 32 invite those questions anyway? Good thing they can't necessarily even know this
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Dec 11, 2018 18:53
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had my first tech interview in several weeks an hour ago think i did ok, save for not realizing that mutable is in fact a c++ keyword (context was "you have a const function that needs to lock a class-member mutex. how do?" which strikes me as a nonsense question, frankly, but at least I learned that mutable can do that) for once I actually have a bit of confidence, feels nice 
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Dec 11, 2018 19:10
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disptach job it out of there, any other flaws? eager to start shotgunning this thing
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Dec 11, 2018 19:32
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I have been asking the question: "I have a 100Mb/s internet connection, how long will it take me to download a 100MB file?" for the last several months to candidates. I think that question has around a 40% correct answer rate. 
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Dec 11, 2018 19:52
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Trick question, the connection has been oversold to hell and back and it will run at approximately 1Mbps.
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Dec 11, 2018 19:54
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I’m considering getting cargo pants and a Leatherman. 1.5 days here and I’m already becoming one of them. 
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Dec 11, 2018 19:55
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Xarn posted:Trick question, the connection has been oversold to hell and back and it will run at approximately 1Mbps. I would actually accept this answer. Nobody has been that creative though. 
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Dec 11, 2018 20:06
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ratbert90 posted:I have been asking the question: "I have a 100Mb/s internet connection, how long will it take me to download a 100MB file?" for the last several months to candidates. 
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Dec 11, 2018 20:14
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JawnV6 posted:lol even google knows The amount of people that say 10 seconds is crazy though.
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Dec 11, 2018 20:15
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KidDynamite posted:disptach job it out of there, any other flaws? eager to start shotgunning this thing code:code: The ellipses on the end of each category is weird, but again that's a nitpick. Do you know how much money your solution saved compared to "costly external applications"
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Dec 11, 2018 20:20
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1. got no latency numbers 2. got no data as to the intermittency and variability of the connection (this is important cuz it's never ~ poisson like they tell you at school, it's ~ a power law)
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Dec 11, 2018 20:20
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ratbert90 posted:The amount of people that say 10 seconds is crazy though. do they say exactly 10 seconds or do they say about 10 seconds, 'cause what are you testing for here?
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Dec 11, 2018 20:25
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As long as you are trying to test detail orientation under pressure and pronounce the words properly I think it's just about an OK question. Ironically making the file 100MB makes it easier as it screams trick question.
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