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Presto posted:Keep calm and Harry on. Nailed it.
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Feb 7, 2022 14:27
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So the shriekcast cursed saga has actually spun my opinion on the first bit up. It's incredible to have boring cop dad Harry and his estranged son. It makes perfect sense that Albus Severus "grew up in this poo poo as the third kid of a dipshit celebrity" Potter is hostile to all of this crap. Why would he be excited for the school bus or his dad letting him go off campus to Hogsmeade every third friday? It's a perfect contrast to Harry being fascinated with wizarddom as a kid. It doesn't pay off and time travel shenanigans begin forthwith, but like, the first bit is so good.
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Feb 8, 2022 02:42
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Time travel stories can easily lead to navel gazing and unfortunately thats an entire diviniation class at hogwarts.
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Feb 8, 2022 05:13
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Presto posted:Keep calm and Harry on. *looking up from reading a comically long scroll while wearing a pince-nez* hmm quite
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Feb 8, 2022 14:39
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Barudak posted:Time travel stories can easily lead to navel gazing and unfortunately thats an entire diviniation class at hogwarts. Time turners are pretty much Jo's writing in a nutshell. On the small scale yeah it makes sense: you created a cool magical device that lets Hermione take a bunch of extra classes which is in character for her and sets up another aspect of magic. Except now you've introduced perfect time travel into your story and like... there are so many instances where they realistically could have or should have been used. Even if you slap an arbitrary time limit on it and say "oh it can only go back a couple hours at most" that's plenty of time for say, Voldemort to retry to whole murdering Harry thing after he touches the Tri-Wizard cup, or to save Sirius (again, lol) from getting his poo poo wrecked in the Department of Mysteries, or any other number of things. "Oh sorry the Ministry smashed all the time turners, none left!" is the laziest handwave because a) those things would be really loving useful against Voldemort! and b) are you really going to tell me that Voldy, one of the most knowledgeable and powerful wizards of all time, can't make his own drat time turner or track down somebody who can and crucio/imperio them until they make him some? Don't introduce time travel into your story unless you're really willing to deal with why it's not used constantly to solve problems.
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Feb 8, 2022 22:25
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From what the podcast is telling me, Cursed Child answers some of those questions!
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Feb 8, 2022 22:35
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Sydin posted:Time turners are pretty much Jo's writing in a nutshell. On the small scale yeah it makes sense: you created a cool magical device that lets Hermione take a bunch of extra classes which is in character for her and sets up another aspect of magic. Except now you've introduced perfect time travel into your story and like... there are so many instances where they realistically could have or should have been used. Even if you slap an arbitrary time limit on it and say "oh it can only go back a couple hours at most" that's plenty of time for say, Voldemort to retry to whole murdering Harry thing after he touches the Tri-Wizard cup, or to save Sirius (again, lol) from getting his poo poo wrecked in the Department of Mysteries, or any other number of things. "Oh sorry the Ministry smashed all the time turners, none left!" is the laziest handwave because a) those things would be really loving useful against Voldemort! and b) are you really going to tell me that Voldy, one of the most knowledgeable and powerful wizards of all time, can't make his own drat time turner or track down somebody who can and crucio/imperio them until they make him some? It'd be fine, that is if she left things more lighthearted instead of trying to tell a big epic story in her children's book universe.
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Feb 8, 2022 22:43
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I like the idea of all the wizards in charge being insane old idiots who make solving every problem ten times harder. Too bad we're apparently supposed to think that's a cool and normal status quo though.
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Feb 8, 2022 22:47
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The real problem with time turners/oops they're all smashed is a problem I haven't really thought of till now: It confirms that either wizarding Britain is a pariah state or that only british wizards could make them. I know my headcanon and I know which answer Jo would tweet out.
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Feb 9, 2022 00:42
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josh04 posted:From what the podcast is telling me, Cursed Child answers some of those questions! Cursed Child goes insane and has a new kind of time travel that's completely incompatible with what was established in Prisoner
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Feb 9, 2022 00:54
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Folks, Im beginning to think maybe Cursed Child is not good?
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Feb 9, 2022 00:58
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Pre-Cursed Child, Time Turners cannot change the outcome of a past event. They instead create a perfect time loop: things happened the way they did because a witch or wizard used a Time Turner. IIRC Cursed Child establishes that some guy made a new, different kind of Time Turner that can change the past.
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Feb 9, 2022 01:03
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LIVE AMMO COSPLAY posted:I like the idea of all the wizards in charge being insane old idiots who make solving every problem ten times harder. Too bad we're apparently supposed to think that's a cool and normal status quo though. All the adults in the wizarding world are old and insane in some way or another, and the only real choices are between the goofy mostly harmless adults and the literal nazis. You're supposed to have been somehow charmed by the wizarding world so you'll care about the order being overthrown by the nazis. If you weren't, I dunno how you got through the first four books.
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Feb 9, 2022 01:19
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Edgar Allen Ho posted:The real problem with time turners/oops they're all smashed is a problem I haven't really thought of till now: It confirms that either wizarding Britain is a pariah state or that only british wizards could make them. I vaguely remember over a decade ago people joking that wizard Britain is the country all other wizards avoided unless they had to, even not counting anything Voldemort related.
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Feb 9, 2022 03:23
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I can't remember where it is from but isn't there some bonkers statistic that in Britain there are only like 6,000 wizards total?
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Feb 9, 2022 03:31
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SlothfulCobra posted:All the adults in the wizarding world are old and insane in some way or another, and the only real choices are between the goofy mostly harmless adults and the literal nazis. You're supposed to have been somehow charmed by the wizarding world so you'll care about the order being overthrown by the nazis. If you weren't, I dunno how you got through the first four books. i mean, you're definitely supposed to be charmed by the people around harry, but from book 2 onward it's supposed to be clear that the system doesn't work. the school board and courts are trivially corrupted by a known nazi in book 2, and then the minister is shown to be a moron in book 3; in book 4, everyone from the ministry is either overly zealous in upholding a clearly pedantic and hypocritical legalism, or a complete buffoon. the ministry is quite clearly consistently operating at a sub-bojo level of competence throughout the series, even very early on. what's baffling is that rowling wrote all of that poo poo and then decided that harry potter believes in the system
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Feb 9, 2022 03:41
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Jazerus posted:what's baffling is that rowling wrote all of that poo poo and then decided that harry potter believes in the system It's so drat obvious that Harry should have grown up to become the dark arts teacher and stay at Hogwarts. But no, he's a cop.
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Feb 9, 2022 03:45
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LIVE AMMO COSPLAY posted:It's so drat obvious that Harry should have grown up to become the dark arts teacher and stay at Hogwarts. But no, he's a cop. No darker art than police work
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Feb 9, 2022 03:51
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muscles like this! posted:I can't remember where it is from but isn't there some bonkers statistic that in Britain there are only like 6,000 wizards total? I mean demographically there are fewer than 35 students in Harry's year at Hogwarts (only 15 are named, we're just assuming all the houses have around the same 8ish kids Griffindor does). Which means the population of the school is like just over 200 kids and no one ever remarks this is unusually small or anything. And that's for everyone in the UK and Ireland. Really the most insane thing is that this tiny pop can fill over a dozen professional Quidditch teams. Literally half the wizarding population has got to be involved in Quidditch in some form and its weirder more kids aren't mentioned going pro beyond Ginny and Oliver. Zore fucked around with this message at 04:09 on Feb 9, 2022 |
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Feb 9, 2022 04:06
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LIVE AMMO COSPLAY posted:It's so drat obvious that Harry should have grown up to become the dark arts teacher and stay at Hogwarts. But no, he's a cop. I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought this was the obvious slam dunk answer to what Harry would do after the books wrapped up only to be severely disappointed muscles like this! posted:I can't remember where it is from but isn't there some bonkers statistic that in Britain there are only like 6,000 wizards total? Yeah the wizarding population is ridiculously small but also JK can't keep her facts straight. She claims Hogwarts has a population of 1000, which would be ~143 kids per year, but she's also said that Harry's class is only 40 students. Maybe it was just a down year for enrollment or something. It does kinda explain the abject horror and terror everybody has over Voldemort, since he and his nazis only needed to kill a couple hundred people for the British wizarding population to reach WW1 France levels of attrition.
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Feb 9, 2022 04:13
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Sydin posted:I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought this was the obvious slam dunk answer to what Harry would do after the books wrapped up only to be severely disappointed 40 students, 10 students in each house, and each dorm is 4 people lmao i guess i could see harry's year being short what with the nazis, but the year after his would be huge
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Feb 9, 2022 04:23
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Zore posted:I mean demographically there are fewer than 35 students in Harry's year at Hogwarts (only 15 are named, we're just assuming all the houses have around the same 8ish kids Griffindor does). Which means the population of the school is like just over 200 kids and no one ever remarks this is unusually small or anything. it almost certainly is a small class, though; harry's class was born at the height of the war when people his parents' age were being killed left and right. i'm guessing that all of the classes are smaller than the historical average when harry is in second year, with an incoming baby boom of first years during his third and fourth years. also ireland is a separate country. as discussed previously, seamus's dad was in the ulster defence association
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Feb 9, 2022 04:23
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There are five Gryffindor boys in Harry's year, and they all get names, presumably because they sleep in the same room as the perspective character. I think there's supposed to be five Gryffindor girls as well, but only three ever do anything or get names.
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Feb 9, 2022 04:44
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In ireland they cast wingardium leviosa by instead saying up the ra
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Feb 9, 2022 04:49
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If Voldemort didn't want his horcruxes to be found, why didn't he just give them to Tom Bombadil instead of going all the way to Hogwarts where they could be captured?
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Feb 9, 2022 05:47
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muscles like this! posted:I can't remember where it is from but isn't there some bonkers statistic that in Britain there are only like 6,000 wizards total? People calculate that wizard population would be ridiculously small from the size of Harry's class but it makes more sense to assume it was just the wizarding war birth rate slump. See: WWI 
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Feb 9, 2022 06:11
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SlothfulCobra posted:If Voldemort didn't want his horcruxes to be found, why didn't he just give them to Tom Bombadil instead of going all the way to Hogwarts where they could be captured? We've been over this, the sentient beings that seeded the universe with two legged humanoid life didn't program Tom Bombadil to care and he would have let anyone, even Katniss, just have it since it held no meaning to him.
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Feb 9, 2022 06:32
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MikeJF posted:People calculate that wizard population would be ridiculously small from the size of Harry's class but it makes more sense to assume it was just the wizarding war birth rate slump. See: WWI Even with that you're still only looking at Harry's class being about half the 'normal' size, and 80 kids per year is still insanely small and doesn't help the overall population count that much.
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Feb 9, 2022 06:55
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The population of Hogwarts makes sense since they've been living under basically Juche for generations at the behest of their unelected insular gerontocracy. The wizards of england rejected the outside world and decided that they wouldn't keep up with the mundane worlds technological advances because if it isn't wizard made its wrongthink.
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Feb 9, 2022 07:16
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LIVE AMMO COSPLAY posted:It's so drat obvious that Harry should have grown up to become the dark arts teacher and stay at Hogwarts. But no, he's a cop. And the punchline to that joke is that the idea was given to Harry by the nazi masquerading as his defense teacher. You'd think it would've registered to Harry at some point that Crouch Jr. was mocking him for being incredibly poo poo at finding dark wizards. Shwoo posted:There are five Gryffindor boys in Harry's year, and they all get names, presumably because they sleep in the same room as the perspective character. I think there's supposed to be five Gryffindor girls as well, but only three ever do anything or get names. You just made me remember how Rowling wrote that Hogwarts had a gender-detecting alarm system for the girls's dorm. Which seems so innocent at first, but when you factor in her terfiness... 
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Feb 9, 2022 07:20
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Barudak posted:Folks, Im beginning to think maybe Cursed Child is not good? Voldemort does not have a nose, but he sure does have a dick
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Feb 9, 2022 07:58
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Nissin Cup Nudist posted:Voldemort does not have a nose, but he sure does have a dick I mean it makes sense, you gotta take from somewhere to add it somewhere else.
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Feb 9, 2022 08:06
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Who is the Cursed Child supposed to be anyway? Is it Al for being given that horrible name by Harry, is it evil alternate universe(?) Cedric Diggory, or is there something extra cursed about Voldemort's kid? Is it because Rowling can't help herself with another weird rape subplot and that's how Voldy's kid was conceived?
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Feb 9, 2022 08:15
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The cursed child, is you, the adult who grew up reading these books and cannot let them go without nostalgic loss even though they aren't very good and the author is a bad person
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Feb 9, 2022 08:17
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Honestly the Shackcast is making me want to go see Cursed Child. I mean I won't, but I'm way more tempted than I ever was before. It's an actual story in which things happen, not 700 pages of "better plots aren't possible".
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Feb 9, 2022 11:41
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The staging is meant to be quite good too?
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Feb 9, 2022 11:50
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josh04 posted:Honestly the Shackcast is making me want to go see Cursed Child. I mean I won't, but I'm way more tempted than I ever was before. It's an actual story in which things happen, not 700 pages of "better plots aren't possible". Same Never thought the conclusion of this saga would be "actually I like the voldemort fucks time travel play now" but here we are.
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Feb 9, 2022 12:10
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Cursed Child at least is a hilarious trainwreck with pretty stage visuals. Meanwhile there's nothing redeemable with Fantastic Beasts.
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Feb 9, 2022 12:38
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halokiller posted:Cursed Child at least is a hilarious trainwreck with pretty stage visuals. Meanwhile there's nothing redeemable with Fantastic Beasts. There is exactly one thing redeemable with Fantastic Beasts. It's the Dan Fogler Hanukkah jam session.
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Feb 9, 2022 12:41
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Barudak posted:Time travel stories can easily lead to navel gazing and unfortunately thats an entire diviniation class at hogwarts. I'm reminded of why time travel sets off certain alarm bells in genre fiction, it's often because it's a very particularly tedious kind of shark jump where the story goes entirely up its own rear end and actual progression grinds to a halt as they literally do the same poo poo over and over
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Feb 9, 2022 12:44
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