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I have deprecated "giving you five minutes of your time back" because it is indeed lovely as gently caress, instead i say "i''m done stealing your time five minutes early"
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Nov 9, 2022 01:21
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rotor posted:I was in a meeting and someone asked about the status of a project and a manager said - and this is a verbatim quote: genuine lol
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Nov 9, 2022 01:58
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peep who is saying something but lost the thread at some point and is indiscriminately spewing whatever words happen to come to mind as they desperately try to get ahold of themselves
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Nov 9, 2022 02:00
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Best Bi Geek Squid posted:genuine lol I was literally rendered speechless
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Nov 9, 2022 02:10
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Jonny 290 posted:I have deprecated "giving you five minutes of your time back" because it is indeed lovely as gently caress, instead i say "i''m done stealing your time five minutes early" this is great and i am stealing it ty
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Nov 9, 2022 03:03
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rotor posted:i was absolutely in awe and immediately wrote it down. I have been unable to weaponize the phrase "happenable" but i remain optimistic for future efforts didnt gar try to make happenable a thing years ago
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Nov 9, 2022 03:55
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I’m surprised that was happenable
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Nov 9, 2022 06:12
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rotor posted:i was absolutely in awe and immediately wrote it down. I have been unable to weaponize the phrase "happenable" but i remain optimistic for future efforts <post-stroke regina george voice> stop trying to make happenable fetching
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Nov 9, 2022 06:41
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graph posted:didnt gar try to make happenable a thing years ago after being informed of the situation, Gar and I became aligned on vision and agreed to actively pursue complimentary goals.
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Nov 9, 2022 07:42
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uh yeah we need to do a checking on the happenability of that
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Nov 9, 2022 13:37
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real surish that was markated as unhappenable after we hittered the timeboxadoodle
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Nov 9, 2022 13:41
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rotor posted:after being informed of the situation, Gar and I became aligned on vision and agreed to actively pursue complimentary goals. 
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Nov 9, 2022 14:56
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anyone who uses more business-speak than me is a mindless corporate drone and anyone who uses less just isn’t operating in a professional manner
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Nov 9, 2022 14:57
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guy who runs the startup and tells people theyre running long when they go over a minute
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Nov 9, 2022 20:41
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subtle founder shade thrown there?
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Nov 9, 2022 22:04
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AnimeIsTrash posted:guy who runs the startup and tells people theyre running long when they go over a minute this is a good kind of peep unti he tells ME i'm running long and then he's a fascist rear end in a top hat
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Nov 9, 2022 22:05
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Let's make sure we're not robbing Peter to pay Paul here! Lets run this up the flagpole until the director is no longer out of pocket. It's important to see if this project any immediate synergies that will enable a network-effect.
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Nov 10, 2022 10:34
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guy with a wide angle camera and a huge greenscreen setup covering the entire wall behind him
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Nov 10, 2022 13:43
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i know it wasn't in the requirements but the goalposts have moved, if it can't be covered in the project it needs to be prioritised through CI
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Nov 10, 2022 14:38
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people who never join the breakout room in zoom, possibly because they aren’t good with computer person who waits until the ‘comments / questions / concerns’ segment at the end to do a racism for some reason???
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Nov 13, 2022 21:33
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person who I need to mute or else they’ll hose up the chat with progressively louder feedback loops
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Nov 13, 2022 21:34
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person who insists I turn up the volume when it is they who need to turn up the volume
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Nov 13, 2022 21:37
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anime titty computer background guy
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Nov 13, 2022 21:38
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OldAlias posted:person who insists I turn up the volume when it is they who need to turn up the volume https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9gOQgfPW4Y
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Nov 13, 2022 21:38
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person who has to have zoom explained from scratch every single time
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Nov 13, 2022 21:51
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OldAlias posted:anime titty computer background guy konnichiwa
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Nov 13, 2022 22:03
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person who organized the meeting that has to leave early, says they’ll leave the room up for everyone to continue in, and then mashes the end meeting for all button, every single time
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Nov 14, 2022 10:15
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just remembered this again http://conferencecall.biz
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Nov 14, 2022 11:16
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AtomD posted:just remembered this again http://conferencecall.biz poo poo lol thanks i had also forgotten about this
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Nov 16, 2022 16:44
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guy who limits standups to 3 minutes because hes scrummaster now
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Nov 17, 2022 03:13
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AnimeIsTrash posted:guy who limits standups to 3 minutes because hes scrummaster now oh boy the few times I've had to fill in running standup everyone always tells me "oh wow, that was fast and painless". The secret is to tell people to "table it" the instant they go off topic.
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Nov 17, 2022 04:03
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akadajet posted:oh boy the few times I've had to fill in running standup everyone always tells me "oh wow, that was fast and painless". The secret is to tell people to "table it" the instant they go off topic. Yeah but you have to pay attention to be able to do this. I prefer to just wait until there is silence, then awkwardly move on to the next person hoping I didn’t just miss something.
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Nov 17, 2022 04:26
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the thing is that 90% of scrums are actually status meetings and its ok to acknowledge that.
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Nov 17, 2022 05:05
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akadajet posted:oh boy the few times I've had to fill in running standup everyone always tells me "oh wow, that was fast and painless". The secret is to tell people to "table it" the instant they go off topic. Way back when we were in office and I was scrum master people could chat about something as long as it took me to write it on a post it note for parking lot, it was a nice visual cue to wrap it up that worked well
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Nov 17, 2022 07:06
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I have found the rush to table anything that isn't "FEATURE A, NO BLOCKERS! NEXT!" can be taken too far. Sometimes people take a minute or two to get around to mentioning things that affect more people. There's a nice midrange where people have more than a minute - I was at one place that literally handed off a little 1 minute hourglass egg timer thing and if you ran out of time you had to stop talking and give it to the next guy - and just letting some guy drone on endlessly about his adventures with xml validation.
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Nov 17, 2022 07:16
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why would anyone want people to be concise in meetings instead of just let them ramble forever so you can just zone out and work less?
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Nov 17, 2022 07:51
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Asymmetric POSTer posted:why would anyone want people to be concise in meetings instead of just let them ramble forever so you can just zone out and work less? Because them im listening to people ramble forever and i can’t think of anything more infuriating
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Nov 17, 2022 13:38
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Armitag3 posted:Because them im listening to people ramble forever and i can’t think of anything more infuriating this happened to one i had yesterday, it reached the 'holy gently caress please just shut up' stage so i left
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Nov 17, 2022 13:57
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I work with a pretty cool guy, but bless his heart he rambles on for far too long, I guess because he doesn't know how to end his turn - so he deflates more and more before perking up with a recap of what he said before which usually feedback loops into more rambling and if you don't cut him off at some polite point, it'll never stop.
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Nov 17, 2022 15:22
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i would much rather be working than listening to people rambling forever
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Nov 17, 2022 17:33
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