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Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Fil5000 posted:

Oh I went one better and let someone else take it.

Ahh

A classic. A personal favorite

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Shugojin
Sep 6, 2007

THE TAIL THAT BURNS TWICE AS BRIGHT...


we took over some things and we are repeatedly being called over a fax line every time they can't send out and man, gently caress faxes





i did debug that the reason the scanner/printer side of this thing was hosed was that it was daisy chained through the "PC" ethernet port of a VOIP phone though lmao

Serperoth
Feb 21, 2013




minusX posted:

They also could just have a file open from the server, would likely keep the connection active.

No files open, that was the first things I looked at. I'll have a chat with them about contacting the right place around us to migrate to either a server or just OneDrive/SharePoint, which they are already paying for.

wolrah
May 8, 2006
what?

Renegret posted:

Wife: I had a bad day at work, I had to call CPS on a family, the whole thing's hosed up.

Me: I also had a bad day at work, and obscure bug broke multicast on our entire access layer and not even Cisco could figure out why so I had to sit there and manually configure SSM on - you know what nevermind
My partner is a counselor and I feel this so hard. I can have the biggest rear end in a top hat clients calling me all day while dealing with the weirdest and most frustrating clients, but in the end it just doesn't have the same weight as the poo poo she deals with.


Shugojin posted:

we took over some things and we are repeatedly being called over a fax line every time they can't send out and man, gently caress faxes
:hmmyes:

I have never been able to understand who pulled the jedi mind trick on people to make them believe faxes are reliable. I've been using faxes since they weren't obsolete and they were never guaranteed to work, especially if you tried higher speed modes (which every fax machine defaults to using these days).

People will call up because one 40 page fax won't go through acting all shocked when they've sent and received dozens of more reasonable sized faxes all day, and they'll demand I fix it. gently caress you, smash that piece of poo poo machine with a hammer and join the 2000s.

quote:

i did debug that the reason the scanner/printer side of this thing was hosed was that it was daisy chained through the "PC" ethernet port of a VOIP phone though lmao
I have no idea why, but I've actually seen this behavior myself where for some reason some MFPs really hate being daisy chained through a VoIP device even though that same port works just fine for anything else. When used in this way the VoIP phone is effectively a three port switch with some basic VLAN handling so it shouldn't cause any problems but something about MFPs makes them weird.

We've seen the same behavior when trying to use Grandstream ATAs' LAN ports in bridge mode so we could put the T.38 adapter right next to the fax machine rather than shoving them in a back room where some idiot will inevitably unplug things, but for whatever reason a lot of client MFPs just would not work properly through it despite PCs, access points, and other devices working fine.

Thanks Ants
May 21, 2004

#essereFerrari


Some really bad phones implemented the PC port as a software bridge (:gonk:), I think we managed to slow Avaya 1600-series handsets down by pushing a lot of data to the PC that was connected through them. Horrible things.

wolrah
May 8, 2006
what?

Thanks Ants posted:

Some really bad phones implemented the PC port as a software bridge (:gonk:), I think we managed to slow Avaya 1600-series handsets down by pushing a lot of data to the PC that was connected through them. Horrible things.
That would certainly make sense for the Grandstream ATAs, since they default to acting as a NAT router and I'm sure bridge mode is just a "well I guess we can do that too" feature.

Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

wolrah posted:

My partner is a counselor and I feel this so hard. I can have the biggest rear end in a top hat clients calling me all day while dealing with the weirdest and most frustrating clients, but in the end it just doesn't have the same weight as the poo poo she deals with.

We've discussed this at length. The difference is that our partners see and experience some really bad poo poo, but are empowered to help people, and by doing so they make the world a better place. A bad day is still incredibly rewarding because she's helping both her staff, and the kids at her school grow and set them up for success.

Me? I sat on a 6 hour conference call because of a 10% uptick in DVR error rates and it's making the KPIs look bad. Then I spent an hour doing paperwork for the overnight crew to replace a redundant line card because our change management process is a bloated mess. I work at a money factory that provides no value to the world. I don't make anyone's life better no matter what the C levels are trying to make us believe. This place could burn for all that I care. In fact, I hope it does.

Internet Explorer
Jun 1, 2005





Marxists would call that alienation.

wizard2
Apr 4, 2022

Renegret posted:

This place could burn for all that I care. In fact, I hope it does.

hell yeah! here's to you :cheers:

Arquinsiel
Jun 1, 2006

"There is no such thing as society. There are individual men and women, and there are families. And no government can do anything except through people, and people must look to themselves first."

God Bless Margaret Thatcher
God Bless England
RIP My Iron Lady

Internet Explorer posted:

Marxists would call that alienation.
Marxists are onto something here.

Internet Explorer
Jun 1, 2005





:hmmyes:

This Marx guy, wicked smart.

johnny park
Sep 15, 2009

I call it being a red orc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LGOYMUQUa2k

Che Delilas
Nov 23, 2009
FREE TIBET WEED

Fil5000 posted:

A ticket came in:

Numbers have changed in <report>

That's it. That's the entire ticket, no screenshots, no additional information to indicate what the numbers should be, were, are, no information on anything the user has or hasn't done that might have caused this, nothing. Amazing work, 5 stars to the ticket creator.

rocket ship emoji, party cracker emoji, thumbs up emoji

Wibla
Feb 16, 2011

Renegret posted:

We've discussed this at length. The difference is that our partners see and experience some really bad poo poo, but are empowered to help people, and by doing so they make the world a better place. A bad day is still incredibly rewarding because she's helping both her staff, and the kids at her school grow and set them up for success.

Me? I sat on a 6 hour conference call because of a 10% uptick in DVR error rates and it's making the KPIs look bad. Then I spent an hour doing paperwork for the overnight crew to replace a redundant line card because our change management process is a bloated mess. I work at a money factory that provides no value to the world. I don't make anyone's life better no matter what the C levels are trying to make us believe. This place could burn for all that I care. In fact, I hope it does.

Bullshit jobs to feed the bullshit machine :smith:

Wibla fucked around with this message at 00:49 on Nov 23, 2024

BlankSystemDaemon
Mar 13, 2009





does it go faster?

Fil5000
Jun 23, 2003

HOLD ON GUYS I'M POSTING ABOUT INTERNET ROBOTS

Renegret posted:

We've discussed this at length. The difference is that our partners see and experience some really bad poo poo, but are empowered to help people, and by doing so they make the world a better place. A bad day is still incredibly rewarding because she's helping both her staff, and the kids at her school grow and set them up for success.

Me? I sat on a 6 hour conference call because of a 10% uptick in DVR error rates and it's making the KPIs look bad. Then I spent an hour doing paperwork for the overnight crew to replace a redundant line card because our change management process is a bloated mess. I work at a money factory that provides no value to the world. I don't make anyone's life better no matter what the C levels are trying to make us believe. This place could burn for all that I care. In fact, I hope it does.

Yup. My wife's a midwife. Her bad days at work are REALLY REALLY BAD, her good days are amazing. My workplace highs and lows are about ten orders of magnitude smaller than hers. I work in managed services for companies that make more money in a day than me and anyone I've ever met will ever see in our entire lives, and I get through it by knowing that the stupid money it pays makes our lives easier.

What I do has basically no value to the world - but on the other hand literally no one will ever die if I take too long with a ticket.

Sywert of Thieves
Nov 7, 2005

The pirate code is really more of a guideline, than actual rules.

My wife is middle management. Her bad days invoice people not doing their work, or refusing to do their work until Anton in accounting had provided another deliverable that is blocked by Michelle in marketing who has to update a dashboard but it pretending not to know how to do it and uurtrrrrrggghhhh

Meanwhile I'm a programmer. Meetings feel like a waste of time to me, but a necessary evil. Her job sounds like literal hell to me, but she's good at it.

Sywert of Thieves fucked around with this message at 13:54 on Nov 23, 2024

Guy Axlerod
Dec 29, 2008

guppy posted:

I don't know if I would trust a seasoned IT professional who didn't hate computers.

We had one younger guy quit because he decided he didn't like computers any more. I told him I've hated computers for a decade already. I'm here because I'm paid, and I can still take pride in doing good work. He still quit, and I guess he became a bicycle delivery for a while.

I guess some people can't take working in an antagonistic environment.

door.jar
Mar 17, 2010

Fil5000 posted:

A ticket came in:

Numbers have changed in <report>

That's it. That's the entire ticket, no screenshots, no additional information to indicate what the numbers should be, were, are, no information on anything the user has or hasn't done that might have caused this, nothing. Amazing work, 5 stars to the ticket creator.

I once got a ticket with only the text "Balance Sheet doesn't". They were correct, it didn't. And somehow that was in fact sufficient information to diagnose and resolve the problem.

Che Delilas
Nov 23, 2009
FREE TIBET WEED

door.jar posted:

I once got a ticket with only the text "Balance Sheet doesn't". They were correct, it didn't. And somehow that was in fact sufficient information to diagnose and resolve the problem.

The balance sheet never does. And I always have to it, but it always eventually.

Dick Trauma
Nov 30, 2007

God damn it, you've got to be kind.
M365 is melting down this morning and the executive assistants are ready to sacrifice a goat for the favor of the cloud gods.

SlowBloke
Aug 14, 2017

Dick Trauma posted:

M365 is melting down this morning and the executive assistants are ready to sacrifice a goat for the favor of the cloud gods.

Also defender, intune and purview so you blind on the management front too.

GreenNight
Feb 19, 2006
Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

GCCH is working fine. Govcloud wins again.

cathoderaydude
Nov 23, 2024

bandwidth on demand

wolrah posted:

I have never been able to understand who pulled the jedi mind trick on people to make them believe faxes are reliable. I've been using faxes since they weren't obsolete and they were never guaranteed to work, especially if you tried higher speed modes (which every fax machine defaults to using these days).

People will call up because one 40 page fax won't go through acting all shocked when they've sent and received dozens of more reasonable sized faxes all day, and they'll demand I fix it. gently caress you, smash that piece of poo poo machine with a hammer and join the 2000s.

I have no idea why, but I've actually seen this behavior myself where for some reason some MFPs really hate being daisy chained through a VoIP device even though that same port works just fine for anything else. When used in this way the VoIP phone is effectively a three port switch with some basic VLAN handling so it shouldn't cause any problems but something about MFPs makes them weird.

that's what's so great about working for an MSP, you see wild poo poo like this all the time because you're constantly being asked to inject hardware blindly into working networks. all kinds of bizarre interactions crop up.

one time i helped a customer with a problem where their entire network would go down every time they got a VoIP call. turned out their layer 3 switch had a SIP ALG. damnedest thing I've ever seen, ALGs are universally a bad idea but why someone put it in a switch i can't fathom. naturally it was so badly coded that if you sent through a call with too many codecs enabled or too long a URI or something it would overflow a buffer and bounce the whole switch.

cool to get to diagnose stuff like this for a bit more than min wage with no benefits. MSP baby!!!!!!!

every single customer who has ever told you something about how their fax machine used to behave is a liar. oh yeah, your poo poo made their fax less reliable, this isn't in dispute, but they're still overstating it. for the last 35 years they just hit transmit and walked away, so they never noticed that the machine was giving up and retrying 8 or 10 times before succeeding. now that you changed something they're standing there on the phone going "did you get it yet Bob, did you get it yet Bob, is it there yet Bob" and with every minute that goes by they write one more alleged war crime next to your name in their Rolodex which they will never cross out no matter how concretely you prove that the problems are not your fault

my favorite is when the machine turns out to have blown a line relay because it's from the 80s. it happens all the time and it's impossible to prove because they've already pulled the copper line so you have nothing to fall back on, and they never have access to a second fax machine to test with.

TITTIEKISSER69
Mar 19, 2005

SAVE THE BEES
PLANT MORE TREES
CLEAN THE SEAS
KISS TITTIESS




Dick Trauma posted:

M365 is melting down this morning and the executive assistants are ready to sacrifice a goat for the favor of the cloud gods.

I've got a user who quit on Friday letting me know that she can't uninstall the Intune Company Portal from her phone. Fair to guess this is why?

AlexDeGruven
Jun 29, 2007

Watch me pull my dongle out of this tiny box


TITTIEKISSER69 posted:

I've got a user who quit on Friday letting me know that she can't uninstall the Intune Company Portal from her phone. Fair to guess this is why?

Either the current 365 fuckery, or her permissions were removed that are required to let her do it?

Thanks Ants
May 21, 2004

#essereFerrari


TITTIEKISSER69 posted:

I've got a user who quit on Friday letting me know that she can't uninstall the Intune Company Portal from her phone. Fair to guess this is why?

Removing an MDM profile and the app doesn't need to talk to Intune to allow it. If the device is supervised then you might have issues.

TITTIEKISSER69
Mar 19, 2005

SAVE THE BEES
PLANT MORE TREES
CLEAN THE SEAS
KISS TITTIESS




It's the first time I've had anyone I've terminated reach out about this, and turnover is somewhat regular (which seems to be normal). I issued the Retire command to her phone, let's see if that does it.

wolrah
May 8, 2006
what?

cathoderaydude posted:

one time i helped a customer with a problem where their entire network would go down every time they got a VoIP call. turned out their layer 3 switch had a SIP ALG. damnedest thing I've ever seen, ALGs are universally a bad idea but why someone put it in a switch i can't fathom. naturally it was so badly coded that if you sent through a call with too many codecs enabled or too long a URI or something it would overflow a buffer and bounce the whole switch.
That is...incredible and horrible... And yes, SIP ALGs are universally bad. Even the one I've ever worked with that didn't break more than it fixed (Edgewater Edgemarc, now Ribbon) still didn't handle TCP SIP or UDP fragments properly so BLF was never stable.

We started as a VoIP company and expanded in to the MSP world since we ended up troubleshooting half our clients' networks anyways, so I totally get the feeling.

quote:

every single customer who has ever told you something about how their fax machine used to behave is a liar. oh yeah, your poo poo made their fax less reliable, this isn't in dispute, but they're still overstating it. for the last 35 years they just hit transmit and walked away, so they never noticed that the machine was giving up and retrying 8 or 10 times before succeeding. now that you changed something they're standing there on the phone going "did you get it yet Bob, did you get it yet Bob, is it there yet Bob" and with every minute that goes by they write one more alleged war crime next to your name in their Rolodex which they will never cross out no matter how concretely you prove that the problems are not your fault
Yeah, that's the worst part, troubleshooting faxes is terrible because the machines don't spit out any useful diagnostic info. Transmission fails 14 pages in? Busy? Entirely unplugged from the line because some idiot moved it to another office? "Line Error" no matter what. Most machines don't have the analog handset anymore and of course no one has a POTS phone just hanging around in their office to plug in to the line.

Even the VoIP side of the equation sucks, for whatever stupid reason T.38 traffic is most commonly carried over UDPTL instead of RTP like every other codec in VoIP so half the tools don't understand it, nothing has useful log messages when things go wrong, etc. More often than not if the call is lasting more than a minute that means I have to break out Wireshark and manually read through the decoded T.38 messages to see what the last communication was before failure.

mllaneza
Apr 28, 2007

Veteran, Bermuda Triangle Expeditionary Force, 1993-1952




cathoderaydude posted:

and with every minute that goes by they write one more alleged war crime next to your name in their Rolodex which they will never cross out no matter how concretely you prove that the problems are not your fault

Ah yes, "everything is IT's fault".

At one place I didn't stay with long, we had some STP issues, which hosed with the VOIP phones. I got it cleared up after a month of bullshit.

A few days after the all-clear, one of the VPs comes after me pissed off, "why are the phones still loving up?" I check out his call. The person on the other end of the call was very obviously standing in the windiest possible place he could still get signal for a call.

"Are you outside and it's windy?"
"Yes"
"Can you get somewhere less windy?"
"No"
"Can you face away from the wind?"
"Yes"
"That's much better!"

loving moron.

Dick Trauma
Nov 30, 2007

God damn it, you've got to be kind.
Over the last couple of years I've had several reports that faxing on the executive floor isn't working.

Please guess the reason for those reports.

johnny park
Sep 15, 2009

It was turned off, of course

cathoderaydude
Nov 23, 2024

bandwidth on demand
It's astonishing that there are simply no diagnostic tools for fax. Nobody has ever made any, as far as I can tell, and I get the very strong impression that all knowledge of fax is gone, it's just a handful of chipsets developed back in like 1996 that're still being produced by the 4th or 5th company to get the masks, I don't think anybody actually knows what's going on inside of them, it's just a black box.

Probably one person at adtran knows but I mean. What's that good for

I spent over a year campaigning to switch our phones to TCP because of the loving fragmentation issue on BLF. It is such a poorly implemented protocol, stuffing an XML document of that size into a packet and hoping that it gets handled by layer three was the dumbest poo poo imaginable, but hey, this is something polycom came up with back in like 1998, and you were expected to use it with PBXs, not try to throw it over a wan link.

Fun fact, you don't need the ALG to shitcan your fragmented packets because about 20% of ISP networks will do it for you. I spent months diagnosing this and came to the conclusion that past a certain number of frags, some router way up the chain would just drop the packet into a potted plant and forget about it.

Obviously there is no way to fix this, AT&t is not going to talk to you no matter who you are and even if they did, there is literally zero chance of getting this changed on all their routers throughout their network, plus it would just move the goal posts so you'd start getting failures with even longer BLF lists, and none of that helps with the next ISP you have to deal with, plus any change they implement will just get reverted by someone who doesn't know what it is a year down the line

So I pushed hard for TCP because at this point we were starting to dispense with edge gateways, so we didn't need TCP support on them for this to work, and windowing handily took care of the problem. It took eons to get anyone to listen to me, but once they did it fixed the problem overnight.

Then it was just a matter of dealing with the hundred other problems caused by running a real-time, lightweight, stateless protocol over commodity internet and LAN with almost no control over the path. Goddamn sisyphean nightmare

Thanks Ants
May 21, 2004

#essereFerrari


Dick Trauma posted:

Over the last couple of years I've had several reports that faxing on the executive floor isn't working.

Please guess the reason for those reports.

There’s no fax machine on that floor


I had a problem earlier this year where a random group of users stopped being able to use their phones to place any calls - the PBX simply never saw the attempt, but they could be called inbound. After a bit of looking in the wrong area because I was told that it was also affecting softphone clients and that turned out to not be the case at all, we narrowed the issue down to an issue where people with long names using Snom phones were affected. The amount of poo poo that a Snom phone sends in the headers of SIP packets combined with a few extra characters from a longer name tips the packet over the edge where it gets fragmented and ignored. As far as I know the spec calls for TCP to be used once the device knows that its SIP packets are getting past a certain point but these devices ignore the spec and nobody at the company seemed to give a poo poo about that.

Thanks Ants fucked around with this message at 22:37 on Nov 25, 2024

rafikki
Mar 8, 2008

I see what you did there. (It's pretty easy, since ducks have a field of vision spanning 340 degrees.)

~SMcD


Dick Trauma posted:

Over the last couple of years I've had several reports that faxing on the executive floor isn't working.

Please guess the reason for those reports.

It actually is working

Cool Dad
Jun 15, 2007

Look out, here come my posts

Dick Trauma posted:

Over the last couple of years I've had several reports that faxing on the executive floor isn't working.

Please guess the reason for those reports.

There are no phone lines on that floor

Wibla
Feb 16, 2011

Why are you still using fax in 2024? :cripes:

Dick Trauma
Nov 30, 2007

God damn it, you've got to be kind.
I prefer technologies that were developed before the Civil War.

The correct answer to my question: there is no fax capability on that floor!

cathoderaydude
Nov 23, 2024

bandwidth on demand

Wibla posted:

Why are you still using fax in 2024? :cripes:

every single person peripherally involved with telephony at their job takes the deepest breath possible and tells themselves "he's kidding, he's doing a bit" and waits for their heart rate to settle

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cathoderaydude
Nov 23, 2024

bandwidth on demand

Thanks Ants posted:

As far as I know the spec calls for TCP to be used once the device knows that its SIP packets are getting past a certain point but these devices ignore the spec and nobody at the company seemed to give a poo poo about that.

lol @ someone cares what the sip spec says. voip phones are all functionally proprietary, each one uses its own miserable decades-old variant of the stack that never gets updated. they don't switch to TCP because in 1999 when that particular black-box sip library was developed at a since-acquired-ten-times startup, someone found that the miserable checkpoint firewalls or whatever were common at the time got too hot if you ran more than 400 TCP SYNs through them per hour, and they got too many trouble tickets about it so they made the setting opt-in and nobody has touched the code since then.

even if it's a bug, fixing it would require someone to report it, which would demand that more than .1% of their userbase know the first thing about sip, or how to diagnose any of this poo poo and come to the conclusion that there's a misbehavior in the device instead of just firing the parts cannon at the problem. phone doesn't work? change routers! change phones! have the user frobulate settings on their modem that you don't understand, then the moment you get a single call through, mark the ticket resolved and move on! do anything you can to avoid real diagnostics because you're woefully underqualified for the job you have!

i spent ten years in the voip mines and virtually nobody "technical" that i spoke to had the faintest idea what was going on behind the scenes. maybe three people a year, out of hundreds, even knew what an INVITE was let alone packet fragmentation. it's bleak out there

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