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Mama, I done bad. There's a lot I could say here. How terrible Major/Minor was, how it broke me in ways that can never be fixed, how it managed to do things wrong, even things you didn't know could be done wrong. But guess what? There's a sequel.  Winds of Change is a new visual novel by the same developer as M\M, and I have reasons to believe it's some kind of stealth sequel to Major\Minor. Even if it isn't, I'm going to treat it as one. For those not in the loop, Major\Minor was a furry visual novel (yes, you read that correctly) that I LP'd a few years ago. It was bad. Bad in ways you must see for yourself to truly understand. Now you might wonder: did the writer of M\M in the intervening years learn from their mistakes, so their next project wouldn't be a towering garbage inferno? Scroll down to find out! bwahahahahah gently caress no. Abandon hope, all ye who enter. Blarghalt fucked around with this message at 05:15 on Jul 8, 2019 |
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Jul 3, 2019 21:54
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TABLE OF CONTENTS Chapter 1: Back to Mad Chapter 2: The Family Name Chapter 3: Mistakes Chapter 4: MS Paw Chapter 5: You Know I Label These Updates Chapters Even Though The Game Has Chapters Itself So This Might Get Confusing But Who Really Cares At This Point Chapter 6: The Tavern at the End of Nowhere Chapter 7: You'll Yiff Your Eye Out Chapter 8: Furshadowing Blarghalt fucked around with this message at 01:49 on Oct 13, 2019 |
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Jul 3, 2019 21:54
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It probably goes without saying but we're here to laugh at the lovely visual novel by an incompetent writer. Please don't mess up the thread by going internet detective or other associated goonery. thanks.
Blarghalt fucked around with this message at 22:05 on Jul 3, 2019 |
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Jul 3, 2019 21:55
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Chapter 1: Back to Mad The stupid goddamn gear sword from M\M is on the title screen. Twice. Remember what I said about me having reasons to believe this is a stealth sequel? Maybe 'stealth' was the wrong word.  You're going to learn in short order what thing the writer is shamelessly ripping off this time. Have you guessed it yet?   Star Wars. It's Star Wars. At least it isn't JRPGs?   That's...two orders.   What, is it gonna burn down like every hero's home village does?  oh goddamnit  goddamnit  Let's break down the first three lines of this game, because why not. First we have the character immediately seeing a village in flames and going "welp, nuttin' I can do about that.  "Second line we have the incredibly awkward line where it sounds like they headbutted their hands, instead of the writer just saying they covered their face or clutched it. Third, there's not nearly enough 'FUCKS' in that question they're asking themselves.  Amnesia? Check. Burning village? Check. The dead parents haven't been mentioned yet, but I'll check it just in case.  We're not two minutes into this heap when we already start seeing lines that were not written by human hands. 'Cognition has found me'?   This game has voice acting, by the way. The actors themselves are fine, but there's only so much you can do when Klace is writing your lines. It always sounds weird, in the way literally-translated Japanese dubs do. I might post some examples later, but believe me when I tell you that the lines sound about as good as you'd expect from a person honestly trying to read the writer's garbage without sounding insane.  By the way, apparently this furry was the main character once upon a time in development before she got changed to a sidekick because reasons. I know more about this game than I probably should. Pretty soon, you will too.  I love this. I really do. Character vomits exposition at you and the first thing that comes out of your character's mouth is them sounding like they just suffered a concussion.  blahblahblahblahblah. Are you even paying attention? I'm the Seeress! I pick the female option, because why not. This is actually the reverse of Major\Minor, where you get your name first and then your gender isn't brought up until like the second chapter where here you choose gender first and then your name a little later. I don't know why you don't get both at the same time, like a normal game.  Our heroine, ladies and gentlemen. "Nah. This is fake."   You know how every male character in the last game wasn't wearing pants? This time it's shirts. I'm not kidding.  "Ya'll use your girly thinking. I'll douse the fire with my manliness."  Don't want to alert the fire. It can smell fear, you know.  In that case you'd think people wouldn't be able to hear you anyway.   I like how instead of the tone of the message, the writer just went with the emotion instead and it makes the MC sound like a psychopath if you choose the 'happy' option. Naturally, that's what we go with.   Has anyone ever cared what happens to the village peasants in an RPG? Besides, I don't know anything about this village; it might deserve to be in flames. Maybe the villagers were jerks. Maybe this is Branson, Missouri. Who knows!  Protect us from the sinful abominations that are shirts. He wore a shirt once. It stole his nipples.  Valinorth. Population: dwindling   At least the art's better and characters have more than one expression this time around. In a lot of ways that makes it worse, like a marble statue but it's a statue of Branson, Missouri.  It's the smoke.   The best part about Valessa is that even when her expressions change on her main body there, her avatar still has the same dead-eyed stare. Watching. Judging.  Anyway, let's honestly answer the question. If any of you know what's going on, please out yourself as a liar now.  First, I think you need to gear up is a few more consonants into your name, Ulric.  I love how Valessa's stuck in her thinking pose. "Hm. Fire...hot?"   We shall fight fire with fire, but the fire is a sword and the fire is fire.  We'll get some pillagin' in while we're at it.   If we run into archers we are hosed. Especially you, Mr. Twenty-Abs.   Of course something's wrong. I'm willingly playing this.  "Wait! I have to barf exposition into your STORYHOLE."   Anyone can wield spirits to induce prophetic visions, you just have to drink enough of them. Preferably in your underwear, in a lightless room.   At some point I guess I'm going to have to address the actual plot, so apparently we're a Seeress who has visions of the future that they forgot almost immediately upon waking up. So the question becomes, how does Valessa as a scribe weed out the visions from the dreams that are just stupid bullshit? Trick question. It's all stupid bullshit.   This is literally the furry version of "this is fine", complete with a raging fire all around us.   If you die in the vision, you die in real life, which is also a vision.  Maybe suggest a fire department when we get back.  Anyway, fast forward to the present, which is not part of the vision and believe me I had to double-check to make sure.  Three mysterious robed characters just don't work. You either need like one or a lot, like a council of them. Three is just weird.  Also the villain's name is Sovy and his hobbies include being nude and stealing Mike Haggar's chest-belts. Also, his name is Sovy.  If you weren't around for Major\Minor, gently caress you you lucky bastard, but also that was the name of a sword that got purified because the main character got stabbed with it and also their real name was Exodus. It's even dumber than I make that sound. Here's the thing: I've played a little bit of Winds of Change so I know this poo poo somehow ties into M\M, but beyond the first chapter or so this will effectively be a blind LP. I cannot wait to see how this ties into the first game's story. I must see the trainwreck with my own eyes.   I have the benefit of having the LP pictures in front of me so I can go back and review them and I still don't know what they're talking about.   Remember what I said about this ripping off Star Wars?   The art's leagues better than the first game but there's still little moments of weirdness, like how Sovy's weird square snoot makes it look like he has three mouths here.  Careful, Mr. Robes. That kind of talk gets you thrown down a pit in the Death Star.    "Your stupid, stinky commands."  "There's only so many ways you can waterboard a guy."  "punish"    I'm fairly certain keeping your prisoner alive is the point of interrogation. Also "Rebel Allies" isn't even loving trying.  I'm not entirely sure what the power dynamic is here. He's acting like he'll get a promotion or something if he tortures the information out of this prisoner, when it really just sounds like Sovy is ordering him to do something. Does the Triumiverate give out bonuses? Maybe he'll buy himself a third sword.  This makes it sound like they're going to kick open the cell door for a Surprise Interrogation.   The centuries-long quest by the Triumvirate to make Sovy at least wear a drat t-shirt will soon be at an end.  Is this a cell or a sewer outflow?   Looking pretty healthy for a prisoner that's been tortured a lot.   Let's appreciate how they're both looking away from each other. Here's the thing: these character portraits make sense when they're talking to you, the player, but when it's just a side scene with no actual 'viewer' it ends up looking insane.   Chop off one of his fingers to show you're serious. That's a classic!    I'm starting to suspect nudity is tied to rank in this world, somehow. Halin has cool armor, but is below Sovy who goes shirtless, and I'm assuming the Triumvirate are all completely butt naked under those robes.  And they didn't think of revealing this information before...why?  Seriously. Did they not think of telling the prisoner this? What have they been doing before?  : hey, you know anything about the REBELLION?" : nope! : well alrighty then! seeya tomorrow! You could give that order in seconds, but how long until it reaches the assassin?   "I'll ask you one more time: where is the MacGuffin?"   that is a goddamn stormtrooper   I feel like a dagger's a poor choice against a dude fully decked out in plate armor   Yeah he threw the dagger behind himself and impaled a guy in full plate armor but let's look at how he's angry at the waterfall to his right. It killed his father. It ate his mother.   More wonderful writing. Something happened, catching us off guard, making us surprised, which is what happens when you're caught off guard, which is   Nothing inside but the lies  This is an example of where the writer should've known what the right word or phrase was (confusion soon hits or strikes or just rewrting the entire terrible sentence over), but instead went for the ~fancy~ word because of course they did.   You don't know that. Maybe they hate nudity. Hint hint. Put on a drat shirt Ulric.   Exactly. Aid me by killing all of you and cutting to credits.   Gotta collect the evidence.   Really? The white and gold armor didn't tip you off?  Look, people don't take you seriously as a shadowy evil council unless you burn down a village every few years.   Tell us brilliant insights such as "I think the village is on fire."   Unless ya'll got some buckets handy or bust the thing open, I don't think that will help.  You think they make a rattling skeleton sound when they fall apart?   Mass graves, Valessa. Duh. You never butchered a village before?   I feel like we'd know if something called the Grand Tree was on fire.   Wasn't this the plot to Avatar?   To be fair, the village probably shouldn't have installed those guillotines in the Grand Tree.   Who wouldn't want Valinorth's rich resources? It is a proud, prosperous, flammable nation.   'cold' isn't the word that comes to mind for this village right now  As opposed to what? Parts of them?  Could it possibly be because neither of these characters have a personality or actual set of ethics?   Poor choices, all around.   It's a good thing they don't count 'let an entire village burn down on your watch' on your permanent whatever-this-guy-does record.  Do these characters even wear shoes?  Let's go after Mylus and punish him for having a name that stupid.   It's gonna be heard to concentrate running the microfilm machine with the screams of the anguishing burn victims.  All in on the library! Double or Nothing! Go Fish!   Like M\M before it, our main character here has become weirdly accepting of their vaguely-defined powers in a very short timespan.  Fade to black. At least with this image we can tell Ulric is in fact wearing pants. For our first update, I'll stop here. Let you catch your breath. You'll need it for what comes ahead. Major\Minor's back. Did you miss it? It missed you. 
Blarghalt fucked around with this message at 06:20 on Aug 12, 2019 |
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Jul 3, 2019 21:58
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Star Furs: Revenge of the Yiff Solar Tornado fucked around with this message at 22:20 on Jul 3, 2019 |
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Jul 3, 2019 21:59
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God drat it, Blarghalt
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Jul 3, 2019 22:12
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Standing at ground zero for this one, can't wait to see how incredibly long and drawn out this can get.
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Jul 3, 2019 22:23
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Solar Tornado posted:
I did give the thread title a good think, but in the end This Time It's Fursonal was too tempting to pass up. Blarghalt fucked around with this message at 04:45 on Jul 4, 2019 |
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Jul 3, 2019 22:26
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I had to bail on the M/M LP in the archive after reading two updates. I could already feel my brain melting in my skull and it was only the beginning. I vow to be... stronger this time.  
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Jul 3, 2019 22:33
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First the first update alone, here's a list of things the writer has failed to learn since Major/Minor: 1. How to employ a first-person narrative 1.a How to write a first-person narrative in a convincing style 2. Keeping a character's motivations consistent 2.a Keeping a character's motivations consistent within the span of five minutes 3. How to establish stakes in a scenario 4. How to give a female character any sense of agency 4.a Seriously, Valessa was originally the main character and now she's been demoted to writing down things the main character does 5. Using normal words so you don't sound like a bad thesaurus 6. Keeping tenses consistent within the span of five minutes 6.a Keeping tenses consistent within a single sentence 7. Show, don't tell 7.a Writing physical action in any way that isn't dragged out and boring Here's a list of things the writer has successfully learned since Major/Minor: 1. The plural possessive was correct once 1.a I'm chalking this up to dumb luck e: Seriously, it's impressive how Major/Minor was a meandering mess because we had no idea what the stakes were until the very end, but now this game proactively says "this is all a dream so it doesn't matter". This writer's ability to keep loving up in new ways never fails to impress. inthesto fucked around with this message at 23:01 on Jul 3, 2019 |
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Jul 3, 2019 22:53
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No, no, NO-
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Jul 3, 2019 23:03
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Oh no. We already have so many problems
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Jul 3, 2019 23:28
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Fedule posted:No, no, NO- Yes, yes, yesssssss- The art's not as bad as in M\M, SO FAR, but Sovy's squaresnoot bugs me quite a bit.
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Jul 3, 2019 23:39
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Good to know that the torturers in this game are also incompetent.
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Jul 4, 2019 00:15
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Ohhhh boy, ground floor  I'd ask whether it's all downhill from here, but that implies there was a hill to begin with.
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Jul 4, 2019 00:17
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Wooooooooah what? Again?
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Jul 4, 2019 00:22
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Minus Green posted:Ohhhh boy, ground floor You know how you've just reached the peak of the Matterhorn during winter but on the descent, you fall, break your legs, and slowly wait for the cold and the dark to claim your ruined body? It's like that. But with furries.
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Jul 4, 2019 00:24
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I would have been so sad if the dev had learned a thing. I was hoping to find this here after I saw the games thread, though.
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Jul 4, 2019 00:47
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I may have cackled on seeing this thread. My eyes just kind of glazed over most of the dialogue, but I will say that the thing I hated most was how Halin carries his swords: I assume they are meant to be drawn from the back, which is a little unwieldy but possible with certain types of scabbard, but he's carrying them upside down. With the handguards there he can't possibly draw them, meaning they are just sort of wings that don't do anything. Best of luck, Blarghalt.
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Jul 4, 2019 01:27
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This is the grindstone on which we sharpen our hate to a razor edge
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Jul 4, 2019 01:37
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Oh my God, how did this happen? WHY did this happen?
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Jul 4, 2019 01:44
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Night10194 posted:Oh my God, how did this happen? WHY did this happen? If you haven't seen the old thread, I'd recommend checking it out. If that's a more general question, Klace somehow convinced enough people on Kickstarter to fund this.
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Jul 4, 2019 01:56
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Blarghalt posted:If you haven't seen the old thread, I'd recommend checking it out. If that's a more general question, Klace somehow convinced enough people on Kickstarter to fund this. It was the second, because I saw the first thread. It is madness that this happened again.
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Jul 4, 2019 02:00
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And while the art is way more expressive, it also clashes terribly with the detailed and shaded backgrounds and the supposed serious tone Klace is trying for. Not to mention the lack of pupils really makes them look dead-eyed.
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Jul 4, 2019 02:23
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Night10194 posted:It was the second, because I saw the first thread. It is madness that this happened again. The original game made like 7k on kickstarter. This one made 30k. And continues to make money via Patreon.
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Jul 4, 2019 02:32
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inthesto posted:The original game made like 7k on kickstarter. This one made 30k. And continues to make money via Patreon. The best part is that as far as I can figure, this game was supposed to be done by like last year, and it's not. I'll get us as far as we can go, but it's entirely within the realm of possibility that what's out now is all there ever will be, because this is Klace we're talking about.
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Jul 4, 2019 02:53
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Which character will I have to draw as a trashcan this time? Wolf Solo or Wolf Vader?
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Jul 4, 2019 03:36
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Of loving course the Sith apprentice doesn’t use physical torture on the prisoner. He’s got to heel-face turn later in the plot, and you can’t have him actually be a bad guy if he’s going to join the party.
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Jul 4, 2019 03:52
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DEHUMANIZE YOURSELF AND FACE TO FURSHED
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Jul 4, 2019 03:58
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Pvt.Scott posted:Of loving course the Sith apprentice doesn’t use physical torture on the prisoner. He’s got to heel-face turn later in the plot, and you can’t have him actually be a bad guy if he’s going to join the party. I know you're 100% correct but I really don't want you to be.
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Jul 4, 2019 04:00
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So... what are we supposed to imagine cogteeth with a bowtie now? Like and  Also it may be my bloodsugar, but I felt sick trying to read the dialogue.
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Jul 4, 2019 04:23
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megane posted:DEHUMANIZE YOURSELF AND FACE TO FURSHED 
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Jul 4, 2019 04:36
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Drakenel posted:Also it may be my bloodsugar, but I felt sick trying to read the dialogue. It's a story written by someone who has never read an actual book; whose only experience with the written word has come from badly-translated Japanese
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Jul 4, 2019 04:49
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It was either me or inthesto that called it Chris Muir Syndrome, where the writer's written word legitimately reads like someone who only barely understands English even though you know they're a native English speaker.
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Jul 4, 2019 05:01
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Oh no.
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Jul 4, 2019 05:05
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Well, at least there's an actual competent art style in this one compared to Major\Minor. I know that's not saying much of anything, but still. At least there's no neon blue squirrels in sight... yet.
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Jul 4, 2019 05:24
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inthesto posted:
2. How to do a visual novel in an actual visual novel engine instead of RPG Maker, I guess
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Jul 4, 2019 05:41
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Seyser Koze posted:2. How to do a visual novel in an actual visual novel engine instead of RPG Maker, I guess Is that really an accomplishment though? Just about anyone can learn how to code in Ren'py these days.
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Jul 4, 2019 05:47
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nine-gear crow posted:Well, at least there's an actual competent art style in this one compared to Major\Minor. I know that's not saying much of anything, but still. At least there's no neon blue squirrels in sight... yet. The art seems fine but the color scheme is absolutely galling. There's this really bright pastel-ish sheen on everything and it looks so ugly.
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Jul 4, 2019 05:53
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Oh nooooo Blarghalt why why do you do this to yourself Super Jay Mann posted:There's this really bright pastel-ish sheen on everything and it looks so ugly. You think that's the fault of the artist, or of the fursonas the sprites are based on?
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Jul 4, 2019 06:08
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