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Cornwind Evil posted: You know, we could just get drinks or something. Lesko can be "cool." If you decide you're done playing with yourself shoot me a line at superlesko@gmail.com. Yes.
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Jul 7, 2010 11:38
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 Oh that god drat Crocodile, I hope he gets-  Devoured by our glorious, eternal champion, Gamma Constrictor. Gezora, a mouse on the rocks please. Artless Meat fucked around with this message at 13:00 on Jul 7, 2010 |
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Jul 7, 2010 12:56
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Coucho Marx posted:
 While I agree with the sentiment, I don't think your quite capable of "watching" anything at this point. Thank goodness for extra-spatial senses, eh?
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Jul 7, 2010 13:30
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BiggerJ posted:
 Any dead satan is good, the politics of hell are inscrutible to any mortal and almost all immortals. His death will send ripples and knock him off his throne, there is a very strange sub-clause in "Ο Βασιλιάς του φαύλου και τις ευθύνες εκε" And for time, I have it. I don't think you understand how old I am, much older than you could ever imagine.
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Jul 7, 2010 13:55
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 Oh, Gezora! I'm so glad you're back! I don't know how to make a Slurm without eggs!
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Jul 7, 2010 15:44
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 Did something just happen? What treacherous vermin changed something? Chekov, Sulu? Spock? Hmph, I seem to be all right.. But be warned, everyone, if I feel the slightest suspicion against anyone again, I will kill them personally without hesitation. But, what the devil? Where did this picture come from?  Barsquid, can you remember any of this? Remember, I have the full force of the empire to back me up if you don't co-operate! I wanted to make something for the memorial for gezora, but due to summer vacation (  ) my internet connectivity has been disturbed and I couldn't post in time. Anyways, so here is a small picture to the best of my abilities(tried to make Gezora helping Kirk "dispose of" too many drinks), signed by Gezora itself(that's supposed to be a suction cup mark). Real glad to have you back in any case, Gezora.Well, in any case, I claim all winnings in the name of the Empire for all the fights that have gone in my favor, with Count Snakeula and Captain Croctosnake having won.   Not much point in the winnings though, since as soon as the shipborne computer is up and running, I will order it to hold the entire planet in ransom. These creatures, especially the snake, will make a fine addition to the fighting powers of the Empire. hail the Empire!  I'm loving the alternate world thingee! Too bad I missed all the lead-up! Amazing work to everyone, as always. Sorry for the low quality of the fighters I made, but I don't remember anyone else having done them, so I took them as fair game. The Mad Hatter fucked around with this message at 23:19 on Jul 7, 2010 |
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Jul 7, 2010 22:57
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Croctopus is going to make a TIMEBOAT out of the snake and sail off happily into the past. Unlike the snake's alternate past, croctopus' is basically the same except everyone freaking loves boats. Superior boat technology means British naval superiority is never superceded by planes and quicker travel times across the world. The Empire is even more retardedly profitable and decadent, paving the way for Zoofights 3. It all fits!
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Jul 7, 2010 23:56
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(While we wait for the final enjoy this little diversion that we can assume happened before everybody turned into snakes.) Way out on the fringes of the location of Zoofights V, at a small desert outpost outside the jurisdiction of the official Zoofights officiating committee...  Sports fans itching for more animal carnage in this wasteland get ready to sate their need with a small cockfight of their own. What few spectators there are cut off their betting as the handlers send their would-be zoofighters into the ramshackle ring. Today's competitors are Rawk-It Goose, a hormonally-unbalanced goose equipped with a jetpack and a blonde hairpiece straight out of the 1980s:  and Joesawph Gobbles, a turkey with four chainsaws tacked onto its rump.  The turkey and the goose gaze at each other for a few moments; but then, just as the fight is supposed to start...  Well gently caress  it accidentally leaned its head back when it sneezed. In retrospect, it's a miracle that this sort of thing didn't happen sooner.  RAWK-IT GOOSE WINS edit: I was going to draw more, with a whole big battle between these two, Vuvuzebra, Kalibri Kahn and Citizen Cane (with a possible cameo from Gezora) but I got tired of drawing things and figured I might as well just post the beginning, calling it a fight. Anyway here's some other pictures that would have been used but now have no place in society. Vuvuzebra just wants to play a little tune leave him alone  Now it's his BIG CHANCE!!! PLAY YOUR HEART OUT VUVUZEBRA  Rawk-It Goose would come back though--with a chainsaw, and a score to settle.  Also, WOLFBIKE II was going to burst out of the doors of this...  but get instantly killed by Kalibri Kahn. and that's it now let's go back to regular good old snakefighting Rodatose fucked around with this message at 05:45 on Jul 8, 2010 |
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Jul 8, 2010 05:34
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Alright, more murder-beasts. The more the merrier I say.
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Jul 8, 2010 05:37
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Rodatose posted:
 Kalibri-Khan is very, very sorry that he and Citizen Cane did not make it to this event. Two-Kay would like to take full responsibility for missing it. Last evening, he feigned friendship with the Cane-toad and Zebra to assess their weaknesses and took them out for some drinks. Well, one thing sort of led to another, several Whores might've been involved - someone might've dared Citizen Cane to lick himself - you know how these things go. The details are kind of blurry. What's important is, Citizen Cane is probably still alive. Somewhere. Look, things got a little crazy last night. Two-Kay himself just woke up. He doesn't really know, but he's pretty sure it's just a Missing Amphibian Case at the moment. If those official Snakefights Recruiters still wanna talk to Mr. Cane, he'll probably turn up soon. Finished or not, that was really cool. Nice work.
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Jul 8, 2010 06:20
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Rodatose posted:Now it's his BIG CHANCE!!! PLAY YOUR HEART OUT VUVUZEBRA This is unbelieveably awesome. Thank you.
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Jul 8, 2010 06:48
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In this harsh, snake-filled world, many things have changed. One of them is the prize for Fight Yer Mates. Don't get your hopes up, though - it's the same as a Gorillion, but with snakes instead of gorillas. There aren't any more gorillas. Gamma Constrictor killed them all.  Should I thumbnail this? The Deleter fucked around with this message at 16:56 on Jul 8, 2010 |
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Jul 8, 2010 08:09
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 You know, regarding this recently-shown 'amateur' effort, has made me realize that as bad as the situation is, it could be worse. The Rani could be involved. This place would be heaven on Gallifrey for her. I tossed an email to Lesko/Heran Bago: if BiggerJ and Grimdude could do likewise, maybe we can do something with this little side story that might, if we're lucky, provide some modicum of distraction for readers while the Major enjoys his honeymoon.
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Jul 8, 2010 08:25
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These are magical. Just a heads up that I'll be posting some bonus stuff tomorrow, but don't let that stop you from doin what you doin.
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Jul 8, 2010 09:03
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Cornwind Evil posted:I tossed an email to Lesko/Heran Bago: if BiggerJ and Grimdude could do likewise, maybe we can do something with this little side story that might, if we're lucky, provide some modicum of distraction for readers while the Major enjoys his honeymoon. Sent.
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Jul 8, 2010 09:12
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Rodatose posted:'Amateur' stuff
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Jul 8, 2010 10:14
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 I'd like to mention once again for the first time that I never doubted our fine serpentine competitor and time-warping champion, never! He's sure to take his rightful place as the kind of beasts, as he should. If you hear any awful rumors about how I may ever have argued or voted otherwise, I assure you they are not only false but patently unbelievable. How could anyone possibly have such disrespect for our glorious master?
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Jul 8, 2010 15:49
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Captain Q posted:Now that you are back, Gezora, how about whipping us up a snake-themed cocktail of alcohol and irradiated sludge? For old times' sake, dear friend.  Gezora does not understand the concept of old time. Gezora was under the impression that time was ageless like a fine cognac. Gezora will mix you up some cocktails that will make you shed your skin, mostly due to the radiation. Empty Sandwich posted:Oh, Gezora! I'm so glad you're back! I don't know how to make a Slurm without eggs! Gezora understands you're confusion. Gezora thinks once you know the trick, you'll be devouring your own young in embarrassment. GEZORA WILL WHISPER TO YOU THAT THE SECRET IS TO FISH OUT THE EGGS ONCE THE SLURM HAS HAD A CHANCE TO SET. Gezora thinks it might have gotten the hang of this whispering thing. The Mad Hatter posted:
Gezora does not remember shaking you upside-down on any one occasion, but it appreciates the picture nonetheless. Gezora is happy you have finally decided to let loose and just relax. Gezora hopes you will join it in a drink to violence, the subordination of lower lifeforms, and morally questionable cocktails.
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Jul 8, 2010 17:09
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 My master would like to know if...   My massster would like to know if Lesssko would like to sssurrender now, or wait until the fightsss resssume. I've talked to Lesko, neither of us could probably draw out the fights that well, and we need to know if people are voting. Why don't we just wait until Major is back, there will be plenty of time then.
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Jul 8, 2010 19:52
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Grimdude posted:I've talked to Lesko, neither of us could probably draw out the fights that well, and we need to know if people are voting. Why don't we just wait until Major is back, there will be plenty of time then. I guess I could help draw a few scenes. If you posted an announcement on the thread, that would get people voting, and then you could hammer out a script for the fight. The worst thing to do is to umm and aww - don't wait too long or the final will eclipse the whole thing.
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Jul 8, 2010 20:42
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Grimdude posted:I've talked to Lesko, neither of us could probably draw out the fights that well, and we need to know if people are voting. Why don't we just wait until Major is back, there will be plenty of time then. The main reason the thread is still open during this down-time is to see what happens with Super Lesko!
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Jul 8, 2010 22:21
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Grimdude posted:I've talked to Lesko, neither of us could probably draw out the fights that well, and we need to know if people are voting. Why don't we just wait until Major is back, there will be plenty of time then. Yeah, what everyone else said. If you don't do it yourself, you're probably going to run into trouble. At best, the Lesko battle will probably be ignored. At worst, you'll be accused of making GBS threads on the finals and causing another Zoofights 2-style debacle. This is the best time to do the fight.
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Jul 9, 2010 02:19
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Grimdude posted:I've talked to Lesko, neither of us could probably draw out the fights that well I fail to see what bearing that has on anything.  A fight lovingly rendered in crayons with the skill of a five year old focusing his entire attention on the details could be pretty   If you really don't want to draw, then provide reference images of the two combatants, describe the fight scenes, and put up Mechanical Turk jobs (or SAMart ones) for random strangers to draw each scene for you. Pick the best(worst) ones. Then share. 
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Jul 9, 2010 03:44
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I'm plotting something but let's take this behind the scenes.  Expect emails/PMs. Thank you muchly for the generous offer The Deleter. Also you're right about ooing and ahhing, it will upset the TVtropes posters oh no what will they say. The good art we can beg for from artists but don't underestimate the medium of Photoshop collages!
Heran Bago fucked around with this message at 05:41 on Jul 9, 2010 |
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Jul 9, 2010 05:12
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Heran Bago posted:Also you're right about ooing and ahhing, it will upset the TVtropes posters oh no what will they say. They're probably too busy categorizing Incredibly Obscure Anime #194673 to notice.  Seriously, nuts to them.
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Jul 9, 2010 07:57
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 Things seem to be getting restless. I think another fight is gonna break out soon. Kinda confused why I haven't turned into a snake too. Gonna just assume time travelers aren't affected. I've been building something out of the free meat, out of boredom I suppose. Not really sure what I am making or why.
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Jul 9, 2010 08:02
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Grimdude, please email Heran Bago at superlesko at gmail.com! (Replace the 'at' with an @ - the forum automatically turns email adresses into links and those are invisble in spoilers.)
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Jul 9, 2010 13:33
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 BONUS ROUND - DRAW BRUTES, WIN PRIZES While the good Major is away getting thoroughly nuptulated, I, the semi-sapient operating system of the Snakefights Pyramid have decided to freshen things up a bit with a COMPETITION The rules are simple. Draw, paint, or otherwise represent your favourite competitor or scene from Zoofights I or the much maligned Zoofights II. Did I say Zoofights? I'm sure I meant Snakefights. Yes I meant Zoofights, don't do something crazy like drawing creatures from Zoofights 1 or 2 as snakes, that'll get really confusing. Once you've created your stunning work of art, post it in this thread with ##COMPETITION in the post body. The contest is open to everyone, including members of the zoofights art team. Before you go claiming this is unfair, none of our artists will be involved in the judging process and it'll mean more awesome art for everyone. The only people that are ineligible are Major Failure, Mrs Failure and Mr Funkies. And me. Plus, it's not like our artists are paid or anything. If they're lucky they get whipped occasionally. On their birthday. PRIZES Yes there are prizes!  1st place will recieve a set of 10 awesome ZOOFIGHTS POSTCARDS 2nd place will recieve 6 very similar AMAZING POSTCARDS 3rd place will receive 3 astoundingly titanic UNBELIEVEABLE POSTCARDS Plus, all entries will be posted on the website, and the winners (and any others we really like) will be integrated into the Zoofights 1 or 2 pages. The competition begins now, and ends on Friday, July 23, midnight EST. The winners will be announced a couple of days afterwards. You've got 2 weeks. Good luck! Gravitas Shortfall fucked around with this message at 22:06 on Jul 9, 2010 |
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Jul 9, 2010 22:01
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Translation: DRAW BEASTS, WIN PRIZES
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Jul 9, 2010 22:22
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Gezora wonders if drawings made on bar napkins using spilled alcohol will be counted? Gezora has to work with what it's got. Gezora supposes it could also use blood and ichor. Gezora wonders if you allow blood and ichor?
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Jul 9, 2010 22:56
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BiggerJ posted:Yeah, what everyone else said. If you don't do it yourself, you're probably going to run into trouble. At best, the Lesko battle will probably be ignored. At worst, you'll be accused of making GBS threads on the finals and causing another Zoofights 2-style debacle. This is the best time to do the fight. This is a fake post right? I can think of two things glaringly wrong with this statement. First of all, Zoofights 2 ended because of TOO much interaction by the viewers. Second, which builds off of my first point, I would be the last person to point the finger at here. I can think of no nicer way to say this, but if anyone is going to make this like Zoofights 2, I would be looking at the people who somehow decided they were involved in and an important part of a conflict that started between two voters through several exchanges of nick-knacks and doodads. All that being said, I have two third shifts this weekend that involved sitting on a couch watching TV while two retards sleep. Can I draw? Well enough if I have the time I guess. So I'm going to spend my weekend cleaning up drool and drawing possible outcomes for this fight. We can vote on it later or something.
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Jul 9, 2010 23:47
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The endless spoilered hand-wringing about the appropriateness and timing of the zoofights fanfiction is far more annoying than any possible actual posts of zoofights fanfiction (in any form) could ever be, no matter when it is posted. Look at what Rodatose did. He didn't spend days and days debating the merits of posting a thing. He just posted a thing and it was great. Just loving post a thing already, or don't and shut up about it, please.
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Jul 10, 2010 00:37
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Alright, Mechos and Red Banana vs. Firenoceros here I come! Although given that that's such a classic, maybe I should leave it to someone with talent. E: ^^Agreed 100%^^
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Jul 10, 2010 00:44
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Spoonsy posted:Translation: DRAW BEASTS, WIN PRIZES  YES YES, THE SPHERES ONCE REVEALED THIS IMAGE TO ME IN A DREAM HAUNTED BY BLOOD AND FEATHERS, BUT I CANNOT CLAIM TO KNOW ITS ORIGINS. PERHAPS I MIGHT TRADE IT FOR A SATCHEL OF GHOST RAT EYES?  I can honestly say I never ever ever expected to have a reason to post this MSPaint of Mr. Atlantic I did 3 years ago.
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Jul 10, 2010 00:56
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Leperflesh posted:Just loving post a thing already, or don't and shut up about it, please. Agreed. Grimdude, send us an email (It's given in BiggerJ's last post) and we'll leave the thread for artists to revisit days of Zoofights past.
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Jul 10, 2010 01:31
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Grimdude posted:This is a fake post right? I can think of two things glaringly wrong with this statement. First of all, Zoofights 2 ended because of TOO much interaction by the viewers. Sorry. Actually, I never saw Zoofights 2, and only learned about the problems with it through this thread. And now, your scheduled stroll through cherished memories. And Swanmass. Cherished memories and Swanmass. BiggerJ fucked around with this message at 02:05 on Jul 10, 2010 |
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Jul 10, 2010 01:49
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Gezora wants to see a conclusion to Robotnik and Lesko's feud. Gezora thinks all of this bickering should be saved for the battlefield. Gezora does not want to have to eat both of you. Gezora would rather share a pint with the victor while devouring the loser.
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Jul 10, 2010 04:18
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Somewhere above the ionosphere, a human figure's ascension is gradually slowing down. Doctor Robotnik! Let's play again like the old times! Who do you think would win, a giant python or an anaconda? Let's bet on it again. What are you wagering? I know your choice is going to be wrong, idiot, you're terrible at Snakefights. Super Lesko's vertical climb inches along slower and slower and eventually grinds to a halt. Super Lesko has reached the apex of his crazy jump. His momentum, the creation of which necessitated leaving a small crater during kickoff, has dwindled until a weightless moment where it is overtaken by "Gravity," one of those weird forces that's just all question marks to him. The balance of the forces predictably tips and the figure begins to descend.  Always hiding in your space house! Doctor Robotnik let's play together againnnn. Play with meee! How are you guys not tired of this black text? The Deleter, email superlesko@gmail.com or similar. It'll be worth your while. :bigtran: Heran Bago fucked around with this message at 06:12 on Jul 10, 2010 |
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Jul 10, 2010 04:25
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Heran Bago posted:*fight*  ... Ah'm outta here. This is gonna get messy. Plus, th' hokey religion marine's talkin' about abominations or somethin' an' Ah need t' lie down. Let's get it on like Donkey Kong!
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Jul 10, 2010 08:48
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Alright ladiesss and gentlemen, we are going to get thisss ssshow on the road. The first ssstep will be a sssimple one really. Let usss... Open voting for thisss ssshit!Thisss fight will be sssettled like any other Zoofight, with votesss from the loyal viewersss! Ssso allow me to further introduce the fightersss: Super Lesko  I think you all recognize thisss fighter. Once only a ssshell of a man; now he hasss gathered the ssseven chaosss emeraldsss from massster Robotnik, and become a sssuper being with almossst unparalleled ssstrength! What kind of powersss do I mean? Well, sssimilar to the effect of Sssuper Sssonic, the Lesssko alternative will provide sssimilar powersss including sssuper ssspeed and sssuper ssspeed. Thisss old man will be a force to be reckoned with! Dr. Robotnik  I alssso presssent to you, the mossst evil of geniussses, the mossst indussstrious of doctorsss, and the most fattest of men... Dr. Robotnik! You know him and love him from the classsic Sssonic the Hedgehog video gamesss and posssibly from the comicsss as well. Dr. Robotnik isss an incredibly intelligent man with excellent ssskills in roboticsss and engineering. The loathsome lord can alssso hold hisss own in combat with hisss robotic arm. I think the choice isss actually quite sssimple really, and in my unbiasssed opinion the doctor will emerge victoriousss! This is on a whim, and I don't even know if we could use the random generator thing, but I did figure that voting was the way to wrap this up. I have already drawn up a few pictures for the fight, and am working on the possible outcomes today. Also I don't know how long to keep voting open.
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Jul 10, 2010 13:57
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