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Directed by: Mark Neveldine, Brian Taylor Starring: Jason Statham, Amy Smart Crank is one of the best pure action films I have seen in a while. You get about two minutes of backstory before the action kicks in, and then it just doesn't stop. Those two minutes are all you need to understand the motivation behind the action, and as soon as you get it you're free to zone out and enjoy the mayhem for the next hour and twenty minutes. There are car chases, fist fights, gun fights, sex, violence, drugs, and anything else you can imagine to get the blood flowing, and it does - for both Statham's character, and the audience. We were cheering, laughing, and applauding the whole way through. The only complaint I had was the camera work, which was trying very hard to be "cool." First person views, cutaways to CG organs, shakey and blurry shots, and needless subtitles were occasionally distracting from the action. If you're ok with smiling stupidly to plenty of destruction, violence, and Amy Smart's sex faces, this movie is for you. RATING: 4 PROS: Great, practically non-stop action. Funny one-liners and action-related gags. CONS: Gimmicky camera work. ADDITIONAL INFORMATION: http://imdb.com/title/tt0479884/
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Sep 1, 2006 22:02
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This was a nonstop thrill ride to say the least. The crowd I saw it with last night at the preview was very into it as well. The movie really doesn't let up once you get past the first few minutes. I don't know if I've ever seen a more intense movie than this. The movie also knows not to take itself too seriously and in doing so sets up alot of genuinely funny comedic situations. The crowd was roaring with laughter at all the appropriate places. I'd say I had more fun watching this movie than I did Snakes on a Plane. Unlike the first reviewer I liked all the camera effects and the use of subtitles. I really enjoyed it, and if you want a good mindless action film with no basis in reality you will as well. 5.0/5.5 Pros: Nonstop action, fun theater experience, lots of good funny moments Cons: None to speak of unless you were expecting something remotely realistic in content
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Sep 2, 2006 00:52
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This movie was completely ridiculous, but for some reason I really liked it. It's the most hyper-sexualized, super-macho, ludicrously violent over-the-top movie I've ever seen. The plot is simple yet almost incoherent at times, the characters are ridiculous caricatures, and the visual effects were obtrusive and often sloppily done - basically, if it had tried to take itself even a little seriously, it would be a gigantic mess. The overt tongue-in-cheek nature made it awesome, however. Basically, the only thing I can compare this to is Naked Lunch (the novel, that is), if Naked Lunch were an action movie. Rating: 4/5.5 - I loved it, but it definitely won't appeal to everyone. Pros: Mindless action movie distilled to its very essence. Cons: If you're not the kind of person who can just accept when something is totally idiotic and roll with it regardless, you'll probably despise this movie.
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Sep 2, 2006 05:36
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This movie is solid gold so long as you know what you're seeing. If you have any hope at all of any sort of coherent plot or attempt to explain anything at all in anything other than bare necessity terms, you'll be let down tremendously. This movie doesn't even pretend to have a point; it exists solely as a vehicle to showcase the most ridiculous scenarios ever. If that appeals to you, SEE THIS MOVIE NOW. It's sheer over the top ridiculousness (that may sound redundant, but it fits this movie) is pure entertainment from the opening minute to the closing credits. 5/5 from me.
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Sep 2, 2006 07:32
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The entire movie is one big awesome action scene. The humor is well played and the action is great. The cinematography is unique and very cool. Highly recommended. 4.5/5 P.S. - the loving cellphone! Eyecannon fucked around with this message at 17:30 on Sep 2, 2006 |
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Sep 2, 2006 17:28
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This movie was loving awesome. I was sold from the moment that Refused - New Noise started playing  . Don't think about the plot, and just enjoy the film for what it is. Eyecannon sums it up pretty well by saying its basically one huge action scene.5/5
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Sep 3, 2006 05:27
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Totally agree with what everyone has said, I just got back from it and it was definatly one of the best action movies I've seen. Ive been a Jason Statham fan for a while and he rarly disapoints. I cant remember the last time I had this much fun in a movie theater. 5/5
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Sep 3, 2006 07:54
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I hadn't heard of this movie until my friend mentioned seeing it, so I had no idea what I was getting into, expecting something more like Revolver. Boy was I wrong. I thought it was an amazing movie and I had a lot of fun watching it. It's gimmicks, like the subtitles, were clever overall, but I agree the cg was a bit much. I just heard the situation clearly, no need to cutaway to a cg heart slowing down, I get it. Very funny, very over the top, very fast  5/5 PUPPY PUZZLE fucked around with this message at 12:43 on Sep 3, 2006 |
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Sep 3, 2006 12:40
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Oh my god, I just got done seeing this movie.... WOW. Honestly, when people are saying it doesn't let up, it's the drat truth. It's loving intense the entire film. In addition to being jammed packed with action, it's also really funny most of the time too. 5/5 GOLDEN STARS Pros: Most intense movie I've probably ever seen, non-stop action, pretty cool camera work Cons: Lack of a sensible plot, BUT WHO CARES. It doesn't really distract from the action unless you're the kind of person to get hung up on it. BOTTOM LINE: Love raw action films? Go see this one.
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Sep 4, 2006 04:48
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loving. AWESOME. It's been 30 minutes since I got out of the theater and my heart is still pounding. Hands down, the best action flick I've ever seen and the most fun I've had in a theater. The crowd claps, laughs, cheers, everything. If you have any interest in seeing this flick, PLEASE go see it in the theater. A rental, even on a nice home theater rig, won't do it justice. The sewing machine part is awesome. Jason Statham just jumped to the top of the "action hero" list. I thought Terminator 3 was great, but this poo poo jumps miles ahead of it. The story is actually pretty good for an action flick, but note I said good, not deep. The ending is perfect. 5/5, will happily drag anybody who wants to see it. Does it look like I have "oval office" written on my forehead?
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Sep 4, 2006 06:02
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In 2001, Frontline aired a documentary entitled “The Merchants of Cool”. “The Merchants of Cool” was an in-depth look at how the entertainment industry strives to unravel the always-changing mystery of the teenage consumer. In the documentary, we are introduced to what MTV and other entertainment outlet companies call “the mook”. “The mook” is the quintessential teenage male consumer who loves scantly clad women, aggressive music, outlandish Jackass-type humor, and anything slightly hinting of rebellion. In its attempt to appeal to “the mook”, Hollywood releases a number of angry, stupid, oversexed films each year in order to capture the mook’s dollar. A few of these films are guilty-yet-forgettable pleasures at best while most are simply overcooked, unimaginative PG-13 safe garbage loaded with plenty of video game and energy drink product placements to ensure that the mook’s money can be seized long after the forgettable film’s competition. This pattern of filmmaking for the mook audience has remained mostly unchanged since its adaptation, but every now and then we are treated to something for the mook audience that is just cool enough to be appreciated by an audience that goes beyond its demographic. Enter “Crank”, an over energetic, angry, sex crazed film filled with all the video game and energy drink references of its predecessors, but with a difference: a genuine sense of style and a hint of wit. “Crank” is the debut film of first time writers and directors Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor and boy do they direct the hell out of this movie. “Crank” moves about with such quick recklessness that even the most over caffeinated ADD-riddled preteen will wish for it to take it down a peg (honestly, I bet there’s not even a single shot in this film that lasts more than five seconds; filming “Crank” must have been hell). “Crank” moves so fast in fact that it doesn’t even really have a first act. Rather, the jist of the movie’s plot is explained within the first five minutes of the film when hitman antihero lead Chev Chelios (played by Jason Stathem of “The Transporter” fame) wakes from a drug and baseball bat induced slumber in his own home. After watching a prerecorded message left in his living room, he discovers that the cause behind his stupor is due to a poison (known tastefully throughout the remainder of the film as “That Chinese poo poo”) that has been injected into his system by the head of a local crime syndicate who was left unsatisfied with his recent performance as a hired killer. The drug works by slowing down Chev’s heart rate until it comes to a complete standstill, killing him. However, Chav quickly discovers a suppressant for the poison: adrenaline, and plenty of it. Thus is the movie’s excuse for some of the most outlandish, violent, and oversexed scenes ever used in a motion picture this side of Takashi Miike. “Crank” is genuinely a compilation of ideas that action movie directors would have loved to put in their own movie, but never did simply on the grounds that there’s no rational reason to do so. However, thanks to its absurd plot, Neveldine and Taylor are free to load “Crank” with as much graphic violence, explicit sex, and careless drug abuse as they possibly want without the concern of having it all seemed misplaced. In Chev’s path to find an antidote for the poison, come clean with his girlfriend Eve (Amy Smart) about his line of work, and get back at the snake-in-the-grass syndicate head Ricky Verona (Jose Pablo Cantillo) who injected him with the poison in the first place, he (Chev) goes to some of the most outlandish depths in his quest to keep adrenaline pumping through his veins. Herein lies the meat of the movie. Chev’s misadventures lead him all over the city through hospitals, restaurants, factories, and apartment complexes featuring everything from gunfights, fistfights, car chases, carjackings, and one particularly epic scene in Chinatown involving him and Eve which is so cartoonish in its execution that I wont even think about spoiling it out of fear that I might ruin one of the funniest scenes you’ll catch in theatres this year. The reckless nature of “Crank”, however, also occasionally works against it. “Crank’s” overactive editing and narration is enough to give anyone a headache. “Crank’s” unnecessary style additions such as needless subtitles, split screen shots, and the display of random images sometimes crosses the boundaries of style-for-the-sake-of-style and becomes just plain obnoxious and distracting. At times I felt like I was watching Quentin Tarantino take back his movie “Natural Born Killers” from Oliver Stone and add his own stylistic touches, all the while being under the influence of God knows what it was that Hunter S. Thompson was on during the last stretch of “Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas”. “Crank’s” story also takes a bit of a beating too during the course of the film. Characters are at times written out of the picture with the same level of carelessness to which they are written into it and Chev’s behavior is at times just downright deplorable. In one particularly hateful sequence, Chev steals a Middle Eastern man’s taxicab by throwing him down onto the sidewalk in front of a group of middle-aged suburbanites and yelling “Al-Qaeda” at him. The suburbanites pounce on the man and attack him, giving Chev the distraction he needs to take the cab for himself. Whether the scene was intended to be a joke aimed at the accidentally racist nature of our post-911 society or simply an exploitation of this film’s own prejudices was unknown to me. Still, I felt the entire sequence was entirely unnecessary and inappropriate. Besides, giving his circumstances, wouldn’t it have been more fitting if Chev just punched him in the face instead? Despite its flaws “Crank” succeeds in its attempt to deliver one of the most excessive, bizarre and hyperactive action films ever made. Crank never takes itself too seriously and doesn’t try to insult the audience’s intelligence. “Crank” knows that its sole purpose is to entertain its audience with crazed action sequences, strange scenarios, beautiful women, and irresponsible humor. The movie’s comfortable with that and the audience is too. I walked into “Crank” expecting another corny “mook flick”, but was delighted to find a movie that had a legitimate sense of style and some honest effort put into it. From its opening title sequence all the way to its Roadrunner-and-Coyote conclusion, “Crank” never once tried to explain itself, which was fine by me. It would have probably ruined the experience if it tried.
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Sep 4, 2006 17:23
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Loved it, laugh out loud funny and mad amounts of gratuitous violence. 4.5
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Sep 5, 2006 23:59
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For me this was easily the best movie I have seen all year. It had non-stop action, and was constantly very funny. Also, the ending wasn't a total copout, which I admire and respect. 5.
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Sep 6, 2006 11:30
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Directed by: Mark Neveldine/Brian Taylor Starring: Jason Statham, Amy Smart Today, I saw Crank. Now, on the surface, this looks like it should be more of the same frantic action schlock (I'm looking at you Tony Scott!). But it's so much more. This is a movie that is all balls-in-my-face action and makes no apologies for it. Everything's here. There's the cheesy dialogue, the improbable situations (which include, and I swear to God I'm not making this up, punching the ground with a bloody stump of an arm) and the gut-wrenching violence. And the fun thing is, it's an audience movie. The way this flick is done is quite similar to Run Lola Run, 24 and other "time driven" movies. A character has a certain amount of time to do something before something terrible happens. This usually involves running frantically around and accomplishing the task at hand and nothing else. As a result these movies tend to be shorter than your average Hollywood fare (RLR is something like 80 minutes and change) because they don't have a B-story to fall back on. Crank is no different. But you know what I like it that way. I don't really care what else is going on except for what's happening to Chev Chelios (badass name). In this case, Chev Chelios (Jason Statham, Brit loving badass) has to have constant surges of adrenaline or a posion given to him by a rival gang underboss will stop his heart. This is all related back to a hit on Don Kim, a head of one of the Chinese Triads in Los Angeles (maybe, they zoom by this, and ultimately it doesn't matter anyway). The real story here is Chelios and whether he can stay alive long enough to kill Verona and various other people who get in the way. There's the usual girlfriend setup (Amy Smart) and whatnot. Hilarity ensues. Perhaps the most definitive reason I loved this adrenaline rush of a movie is because of the anticipation, the fact that I was rooting for the movie to go where I wanted it. And more often than not it went there. For example, bad guy gets hand chopped off with a meat cleaver; I say "punch his rear end with the stump!"; bad guy tries to and ends up punching the hard ground. Even better. And the fact that even though it's more or less nonstop action there are breathing periods. There is a small respite but you don't get much more than Chelios introspecting and then being told he's still gonna die (unless...). The nuts and bolts: The cinematography is about what you would expect from a frenetic action movie these days. They don't overdo it with the snap cutting like in Domino and for that I'm thankful. The acting by Statham is about what you'd expect, but really the man was born to play bad-motherfuckers so pretty much anything he does action-wise is believable. Amy Smart is pretty good as the pot-addled girlfriend (who is quite the sexual freak). Storywise, I felt pretty satisfied save for maybe the ending. But even that can be forgiven when the trailer tells you that "this is the day I [Chev Chelios] die." Everything else just fit perfectly the genre, the style and in most cases the characters of the movie. Highlight: A group of Asians cheering for street sex. Or maybe Statham doing a Jesus pose on a motorcycle. I can't decide. Rating: All four of my heart ventricles (which coincidentally got a good workout from watching this mother). RATING: 5 PROS: Awesome, balls to the wall action; Statham being Statham. CONS: Not for everyone; little kids for example. ADDITIONAL INFORMATION: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0479884/
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Sep 7, 2006 06:35
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I watched this last night, it was simply awesome, easily one of the best films I have seen this year. I thought that the comedy in the film suited it to a tee, it reminded you that you shouldn't really be taking the film seriously. Like when Chev knocked Eve's bag out of her hand and kicked a few guys asses while she picked up her stuff. The part where he was watching TV in the street with a hard on had me choking on my popcorn It was just amazingly entertaining, so easy to watch, if all you want to do is sit in a cinema and chill without having to concentrate too much on a a story line then this film is perfect for you. 5
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Sep 7, 2006 10:19
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If you poll a thousand male college students, and ask them what they would like to see most in an action movie, and then you take every single submission, even the ones written in jest, and pack them into 85 minutes of film, you'll probably get something like Crank. It is the most excessive, misogynistic, and funny movies in ages. 4.5/5
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Sep 8, 2006 04:02
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I hated this movie. Yes, I know it's supposed to be stupid and mind numbing, but I didn't pay 9 dollars to have my mind rot for an hour. It was boring to look at, the action was less than impressive, the unique story concept was wasted by the shitacular storyline, and the ending was one of the stupidest things I've ever seen. If they had revealed at the end that his character was inside a video game or movie or something, I may have liked it better. As it stands, it's just a loud, badly made action movie. (1/5) It's one of the few movies I've seen that seems to directly be aimed at the lowest common denominator. Don't waste your money on it.
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Sep 8, 2006 14:36
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Unlike the prude above me, I enjoyed the action and the excitement of it all. The story is one of the best I think of in terms of originality. Loved it, I'll Definitely pick up the DVD. 5/5 Two thumbs way UP!
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Sep 9, 2006 06:32
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Totally ridiculous and hilarious. Worth a watch if you liked the Transporter or action movies in general. Honestly, no more description is really necessary. 4/5
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Sep 9, 2006 07:09
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If you could mix Grand Theft Auto with Hitman, then add more comedy to it, it would be this movie. 5/5.5
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Sep 10, 2006 06:57
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I went into this expecting mindless action. What I got was everything I couldn't possibly have possibly wished for and imagined in even my wildest dreams. gently caress Snakes on a Plane, this is a true classic. Amazing in every regard. Leaving the theatre my heart was pounding, my throat was hoarse from laughing so hard, and I wanted to loving punch someone in the face. Go see it. NOW. 6 out of loving 5
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Sep 10, 2006 08:04
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I was hoping Crank would be the new Running Scared. It was not. It was about half of what Running Scared was. If you like Crank, Running Scared will blow you away. 2.5/5
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Sep 11, 2006 09:21
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BLAH BLAH Running Scared HYPE BLAH. Running Scared ain't THAT great. It's a rush for most of the film but doesn't hold up well to repeat viewings. And it pisses away a lot of it's goodwill at the end. It's fast becoming the Boondock Saints of 2006. As for Crank: over the top and a lot of fun. More funny than intense. It is what it is. 3/5
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Sep 11, 2006 23:49
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This is the old school action movie. If you want an OMGSODEEP Donnie Darko-esque movie, you'll hate this. However, if you want a bald headed, husky voiced man shooting the gently caress out of people, you'll leave happy. It dosen't try to have a deep plot or thought inducing story. Basically, it's a guy who's been injected by a poision that will kill him if his adrenaline gets too low. He has to constantly kick rear end to stay alive, and kick rear end he does. This movie is all about asskicking, and it delivers in spades. Truly, a throwback to the times when action movies were simpler and didn't need a deep plot and 14 love triangles to be successful. 5/5
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Sep 12, 2006 03:25
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This movie was loving amazing. Even though I missed the first 5 minutes of it, it was still fantastic. The action was non-stop as described above, and even though nobody like the "style" of it, I still laughed even when they panned over the city with shots from Google Earth  It's got everything; action, boobies, drugs, beatings, violence, humor, and then some more action. Jason Statham is a badass, and this wouldn't be nearly as good a movie with anyone else starring in it. 5.5/5 P.S. I'll be waiting there you penis
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Sep 12, 2006 07:00
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This movie was positvely delightful. Great action sequences, hilarious interludes, and absolutely classic one liners "The names chav chillios, and tell the doctor i will be dead in an hour if he doesnt call me back!" "how do you spell that?" "DEE EE AYE DEE. CHILLIOS!" that and the "steel hardon" had me bawling 5/5
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Sep 17, 2006 20:07
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Lowbrow, forced action flick. 2/5
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Sep 18, 2006 14:06
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The best movie I've seen in a long time, including running scared which I also thought was fantastic. The only con I can think of is that, although I liked the ending, I wish it had been longer.
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Sep 19, 2006 04:50
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This was one of the worst movies I've seen in recent memory. If the action in the movie had actually been any good, I would have liked it more. But there were hardly any fight scenes, and the ones shown were completely boring. Non-stop asskicking? More like nonstop Jason Statham running around making stupid comments and doing drugs. A few moments made me laugh but overall, I thought the movie did way too much stuff just because it could, which is a terrible reason to do anything. Being over the top is great if you're actually going to be creative, interesting, or funny about it. Otherwise, what's the point? 0.5/5
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Sep 19, 2006 05:33
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Simplistic, yet relatively satisfying action flick. It's not high art, and it makes no apologies for what it is. As long as you know what to expect, it's not hard to get caught up in the rush. As a filmmaker bonus, it's good to see HD progressing, and the film largely used the format to its advantages. 3 Pros: Exciting, few dull moments, relatively entertaining. Cons: Plays out too largely like a teenage male fantasy; some scenes don't work well.
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Sep 19, 2006 07:49
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No filler, and all action. The action, though explicit, isn't patronizing, suprisingly. They took risks with the script, they even 'bait' you with a camera pan that doesn't reveal the next step/attack/enemy, instead, something else, unexpected, takes a different turn. Twists? Not really, but a lot of little micro-teases most viewers won't even catch, but enjoy all the while. Great ending, as well, unapologetically so. As far as action flicks go? 5/5 Overall? 4/5 I will buy the DVD, no questions asked!
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Sep 24, 2006 02:32
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There was so much kinetic and manly action being flung at the screen by the projector that some of it bounced off, spraying my face with a light glaze of 50/50 testosterone/adrenaline mix. The over-the-top nature combined with the realism from the lack of CGI lent itself to a cartoonish, rubber-reality tone that, in short, was super loving awesome to watch. True, the characters are stereotypes at best, but they were all propelled through the film so fast that I didn't care that they didn't slow down to explain things. Hell, the major plot points usually come in the middle of action scenes. That takes skill to pull off smoothly, and Neveldine/Taylor do. 5/5
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Sep 28, 2006 18:32
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A mindless thrillride and a character I could really relate to plus a hilariously appropriate soundtrack and flair not found in most movies today. I give it a 5
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Oct 3, 2006 17:35
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This is like the Serious Sam of action movies, but better. By that I mean, it makes no sense what so ever.. But its a constant action scene blowing the poo poo out of everything and some pretty  moments. If this movie was taking it seriously it would be a joke, but its a fun movie with a lot of stupid/funny moments. I should also mention that Jason Statham rules. I didn't really like the camera work-- the sorta bloom effects they had going on were pretty stupid but whatever.Pretty enjoyable/simple/fun movie worth watching. 4/5
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Oct 8, 2006 23:54
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This movie was a loving orgy. If you have a short attention span go see it. Not a second is wasted. If you are looking for deep characters and realistic situations, forget it! Also I loved the camera work, and I think that the ridiculous effects added to the jam-packed intensity of the movie. P.S. Did anyone notice the turtlefucking projection? On the roof of the bathroom in hotel lint 5/5
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Oct 17, 2006 12:10
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On the mass machismo level, I have to rate this move a solid 8 out of 10. 1 being marry Poppins, 10 being Total Recall. Not only was there blood, gore, loving, loving in public and on a newspaper stand. There was also cutting, shooting, tons of good looking naked women, a vendetta to kill someone, and some awesome trippy artwork. All in all, If you are in the mood to watch a man movie, I would suggest this movie, if you are the mood for a movie that has a actual plot that isn't just a thinly disguised way to make the movie, I would not suggest this movie. All in all, I give this movie, a 8 out of 10 for mass machismo, and 4.8 out of 5 overall.
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Oct 22, 2006 07:11
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Loved it. I was expecting a non-stop action flick and got some good comedy thrown in too. Most importantly the ending did not make me roll my eyes. Take an awesome action film, sprinkle in some comedy and some bizarre yet interesting camera work, a dumb blonde, a fag, and then strip away all the normal bullshit unnecessary crap they always put into action movies to give them 'depth' for no apparent reason, and you've got Crank. 5/5
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Nov 3, 2006 22:07
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Absolutely loving awful. This was one of the most insulting and offensive films I've ever seen, and the editing literally gave me a headache. I love over the top action movies like The Marine and Commando, but this was like watching an MTV video for 90 minutes. 0.5/5
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Jan 18, 2007 11:02
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Interesting movie. It kept me entertained, but it was nothing mindblowing. I would reccomend someone to watch it just for the over the top style. Overall a pretty enjoyable movie, but nothing to write home about. 3/5
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Jan 19, 2007 01:46
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Stealth Ninja posted:I hated this movie. Just watched the DVD version, so I'm not sure if the after credit stuff was in there... but it is overtly hinted that it's an arcade game . I laughed out loud a number of times and was pretty entertained. I think the fact that, as many others have said, the flick doesn't take itself seriously at all is what makes it such a good time. The cheesy effects, the ridiculous subtitles, all of it just adds up to a great movie to appeal to anybody that enjoys carnage and sex riddled video games (Hitman and Duke Nukem, I'm looking at you). 4/5
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Jan 28, 2007 08:14
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