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Stupid_Sexy_Flander
Mar 14, 2007

Is a man not entitled to the haw of his maw?
Grimey Drawer
Iirc those 2 love triangle dudes are Idris Elba and Chris pine so, yea if you gotta be stuck choosing between two dudes, that will not be an easy decision.

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Runcible Cat
May 28, 2007

Ignoring this post

Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:

Iirc those 2 love triangle dudes are Idris Elba and Chris pine so, yea if you gotta be stuck choosing between two dudes, that will not be an easy decision.

Why choose? It's obvious that with the future of the human race at stake you have to make the terrible sacrifice of doing both. Oh the suffering, the horror.

The_Doctor
Mar 29, 2007

"The entire history of this incarnation is one of temporal orbits, retcons, paradoxes, parallel time lines, reiterations, and divergences. How anyone can make head or tail of all this chaos, I don't know."

Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:

Iirc those 2 love triangle dudes are Idris Elba and Chris pine so, yea if you gotta be stuck choosing between two dudes, that will not be an easy decision.

Chiwetel Ejiofor, not Idris Elba. It’s still a hard choice, so I’d just have both. We’re a throuple now.

Rupert Buttermilk
Apr 15, 2007

🚣RowboatMan: ❄️Freezing time🕰️ is an old P.I. 🥧trick...

The_Doctor posted:

Chiwetel Ejiofor, not Idris Elba. It’s still a hard choice, so I’d just have both. We’re a throuple now.

A harder (heh) choice would be between Chiwetel and Idris.

Hughlander
May 11, 2005

Looking for a short story may have just been posted online. Basically about capitalism in the land of automation. An Alexa style app is added to mcdonalds telling you when to cook when to clean when to order. And all of management is laid off. Then the voice is added to the drive through and registers and staff is cut in half. Then automated burger flippers lay off the rest. The rich respond by basic debtors prisons where if you don’t have a job you have to live in dorms and can’t leave unless you can prove you are working.

It ends with Australia had adopted the same as tech but instead with universal income and people were free to do what they wanted instead of the 1% taking everything.

wizzardstaff
Apr 6, 2018

Zorch! Splat! Pow!

Hughlander posted:

Looking for a short story may have just been posted online. Basically about capitalism in the land of automation. An Alexa style app is added to mcdonalds telling you when to cook when to clean when to order. And all of management is laid off. Then the voice is added to the drive through and registers and staff is cut in half. Then automated burger flippers lay off the rest. The rich respond by basic debtors prisons where if you don’t have a job you have to live in dorms and can’t leave unless you can prove you are working.

It ends with Australia had adopted the same as tech but instead with universal income and people were free to do what they wanted instead of the 1% taking everything.

Sounds like Manna by Marshall Brain.

Hughlander
May 11, 2005

wizzardstaff posted:

Sounds like Manna by Marshall Brain.

Got it in one ; thanks

Sjs00
Jun 29, 2013

Yeah Baby Yeah !
I recently read within 5 years ago a book that was very specific.
Takes place in NYC or Chicago, group of young black boys watching out in all 4 directions of a drug den. They all have phones; the drug den gets busted and they all scatter. Despite having phones, MC had stress stay off the phones etc.

Book continues and the MC has a younger brother and other black youth get drafted to deliver a package across the country or something similar. there's a scene where they MC and another character go and buy guns from a gun dealer, they describe the process and how the naive MC gets ripped off. when they return to the younger brother the younger one gets angry gets the money back and a nicer gun. The young kid keeps saying 'Glock or Tec' the whole chapter.
I think the younger brother is constantly playing shooting games on his phone or something

they have a chapter in Vegas and while the headstrong side character wastes tons of time gambling their car begins to get towed and the younger brother pistol whips the towtruck driver and they drive away

eventually they deliver the package and then all go their separate ways, the MC works at a paintball arena for weeks later, his brother comes looking for him and he shoots his younger brother. He takes both of their guns and goes on the run for a while, I dont really remember the rest

I can keep reciting chapters from the book really wish I knew what the name was

Sjs00 fucked around with this message at 05:49 on May 17, 2021

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



I just remembered a book from my childhood, a fantasy story where the main character is a member of some kind of a species of blue-skinned creatures, almost elf-like? Who has to go on some kind of a quest to rescue his people.

On this quest, he encounters an actual human (who I think breaks their leg later in the story?) There's also a wizard of memories, and the antagonist is some kind of a quadraped reptile/amphibian creature.

If anyone can recognize this... I will be astounded. But I can't think of where else to turn to to try to remember it.

Yngwie Mangosteen
Aug 23, 2007

Samovar posted:

I just remembered a book from my childhood, a fantasy story where the main character is a member of some kind of a species of blue-skinned creatures, almost elf-like? Who has to go on some kind of a quest to rescue his people.

On this quest, he encounters an actual human (who I think breaks their leg later in the story?) There's also a wizard of memories, and the antagonist is some kind of a quadraped reptile/amphibian creature.

If anyone can recognize this... I will be astounded. But I can't think of where else to turn to to try to remember it.

You're almost describing Avatar.

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



Captain Monkey posted:

You're almost describing Avatar.

Good point. Yeah, it's a terrible description, but I can barely remember anything else. Other than that there was some kind of divine light trapped under a rock which killed the badguy? Maybe not a rock, but a millstone?

If I couldn't remember the cover of the book I could swear it was a fever dream.

Unkempt
May 24, 2003

...perfect spiral, scientists are still figuring it out...

Samovar posted:

Good point. Yeah, it's a terrible description, but I can barely remember anything else. Other than that there was some kind of divine light trapped under a rock which killed the badguy? Maybe not a rock, but a millstone?

If I couldn't remember the cover of the book I could swear it was a fever dream.

Are there any words at the top of the cover you can remember?

Ripley
Jan 21, 2007

Samovar posted:

I just remembered a book from my childhood, a fantasy story where the main character is a member of some kind of a species of blue-skinned creatures, almost elf-like? Who has to go on some kind of a quest to rescue his people.

On this quest, he encounters an actual human (who I think breaks their leg later in the story?) There's also a wizard of memories, and the antagonist is some kind of a quadraped reptile/amphibian creature.

If anyone can recognize this... I will be astounded. But I can't think of where else to turn to to try to remember it.

Do you know roughly when the book would've been written, or whether it was targeted at adults / YA / children? That might help clue someone in.

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



Ripley posted:

Do you know roughly when the book would've been written, or whether it was targeted at adults / YA / children? That might help clue someone in.

I think it would have been for kids. Maybe Y.A.? It would have been at the latest written in the early 90s.

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



Goddamn, found it. Brog the Stoop.

Hughlander
May 11, 2005

Samovar posted:

Goddamn, found it. Brog the Stoop.

Glad you found it but love how the Amazon description is basically 11th grade fantasy writing.txt:

quote:

The Source of Light is failing...And for the Stoop who inhabit Drabwurld, the encroaching darkness brings a terrible danger. Their mortal enemies the Gork, led by the vicious Redeye, grow ever stronger as the Light fades slowly away. And it is only a matter of time before the Stoop are utterly destroyed...
But there is one Stoop, who will not accept defeat. For Brog has the brave heart needed to find the Source of Light, and restore it to its former glory. And as he sets off on his perilous question, the Stooplord, Klan the Golden, leads the Stoop in a final, and possibly fatal, battle against the Gork...

Sham bam bamina!
Nov 6, 2012

ƨtupid cat
Klan the Golden

Splicer
Oct 16, 2006

from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸
Short story about a member of a resistance against some form of regime. They've captured him and they keep running him through virtual reality sessions trying to trick him into revealing something important about the resistance, with his captor always laughing as he starts to wake up. He escapes or the revolution win or something and he lives a full and happy life only for him to on his death bed wake up to the guy laughing at him again. The last line is something like "The resistance rescued him a few days later but he never believed them" or something to that effect.

Antivehicular
Dec 30, 2011


I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Sham bam bamina! posted:

Klan the Golden

Ruler of Drabwurld!

Selachian
Oct 9, 2012

All that talk of Stoops makes me think it's a fantasy war between different Brooklyn brownstones.

Data Graham
Dec 28, 2009

📈📊🍪😋



ITT, perilous questions

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



Sham bam bamina! posted:

Klan the Golden

mods pls change sham bam baminas name to this

Soonmot
Dec 19, 2002

Entrapta fucking loves robots




Grimey Drawer
Okay, this was a book series in the 1980's, maybe early 90s. There were werewolves on possibly a college campus or some kind of school, but the twist was that the werewolves were actually aliens!

Sham bam bamina!
Nov 6, 2012

ƨtupid cat

Soonmot posted:

Okay, this was a book series in the 1980's, maybe early 90s. There were werewolves on possibly a college campus or some kind of school, but the twist was that the werewolves were actually aliens!
Google pulled up this post on Stack Exchange about the Private School series, by Steven Charles.

regulargonzalez
Aug 18, 2006
UNGH LET ME LICK THOSE BOOTS DADDY HULU ;-* ;-* ;-* YES YES GIVE ME ALL THE CORPORATE CUMMIES :shepspends: :shepspends: :shepspends: ADBLOCK USERS DESERVE THE DEATH PENALTY, DON'T THEY DADDY?
WHEN THE RICH GET RICHER I GET HORNIER :a2m::a2m::a2m::a2m:

Soonmot posted:

Okay, this was a book series in the 1980's, maybe early 90s. There were werewolves on possibly a college campus or some kind of school, but the twist was that the werewolves were actually aliens!

Google says it's the Private School series by Steven Charles and that the werewolves = aliens reveal happens in book 5, The Enemy Within

Efb

Soonmot
Dec 19, 2002

Entrapta fucking loves robots




Grimey Drawer
Yes thank you! That was the only book of the series that I had, hilarious that it was the fifth.

What did you Google? Because I did 80s book werewolves are aliens and got nothing

regulargonzalez
Aug 18, 2006
UNGH LET ME LICK THOSE BOOTS DADDY HULU ;-* ;-* ;-* YES YES GIVE ME ALL THE CORPORATE CUMMIES :shepspends: :shepspends: :shepspends: ADBLOCK USERS DESERVE THE DEATH PENALTY, DON'T THEY DADDY?
WHEN THE RICH GET RICHER I GET HORNIER :a2m::a2m::a2m::a2m:

I searched: college werewolves aliens book and it was the second result

Sham bam bamina!
Nov 6, 2012

ƨtupid cat
I put in "alien werewolves book series" and scrolled past about a page of results for Kindle porn.

Soonmot
Dec 19, 2002

Entrapta fucking loves robots




Grimey Drawer
Yeah that scans

Agents are GO!
Dec 29, 2004

Identify that story/book: scrolled past about a page of results for Kindle porn

Runcible Cat
May 28, 2007

Ignoring this post

Old pulp story: I keep thinking it's Murray Leinster or someone like that, but can't find it.

Random guy, possibly a priest, out in the middle of nowhere when an alien spaceship lands. The aliens are a couple with a baby, and they manage to get across to him that they're starving and desperate. He gives them what food he's got and they can't digest it. Then they somehow figure out they could digest him, nope out and leave because they're desperate but not that desperate.

Anyone know it?

Ed: Food to all Flesh by Zenna Henderson, if anyone else ever comes looking for it

Runcible Cat fucked around with this message at 20:21 on May 30, 2021

happyhippy
Feb 21, 2005

Playing games, watching movies, owning goons. 'sup
Pillbug
Scifi book I once read at random in the 90s from local library.
Humans and an alien race are living together, getting to know each other, and the alien kids go through a 'puberty' of shedding their hands or limbs.
Some human kids end up dying trying to cut their own hands/limbs off in some sort of gang thing, but turns out some were murdered instead.

ploots
Mar 19, 2010
A post apocalyptic story, probably in a book of shorts. A society of people live on the great pacific garbage patch; the garbage has been sorted by generations of people so there are areas like candle town and dead battery village. The main character is a woman, who has been kicked out by her family for ruining something important.

ploots fucked around with this message at 06:02 on Jun 5, 2021

Saerdna
Aug 8, 2004
I read this probably 25 years ago. A young boy is visited by Thor who tells him someone stole Freya's apples that the Aesir eat to stay young, so now they're all growing old. He has to come with Thor to Midgard and help them get the apples back, for some reason. When he gets there he plays football with some local kids, using a dead warrior's head as ball (it grows back) and he gets a sword from the dwarves (elves) which glows and grows longer when there is danger nearby. I remember it was really fun but I can't find it

Biplane
Jul 18, 2005

Saerdna posted:

I read this probably 25 years ago. A young boy is visited by Thor who tells him someone stole Freya's apples that the Aesir eat to stay young, so now they're all growing old. He has to come with Thor to Midgard and help them get the apples back, for some reason. When he gets there he plays football with some local kids, using a dead warrior's head as ball (it grows back) and he gets a sword from the dwarves (elves) which glows and grows longer when there is danger nearby. I remember it was really fun but I can't find it

You sure this is a book and not a comic?
E: this is what your post immediately brought to mind: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valhalla_(comics)

SimonChris
Apr 24, 2008

The Baron's daughter is missing, and you are the man to find her. No problem. With your inexhaustible arsenal of hard-boiled similes, there is nothing you can't handle.
Grimey Drawer

Saerdna posted:

I read this probably 25 years ago. A young boy is visited by Thor who tells him someone stole Freya's apples that the Aesir eat to stay young, so now they're all growing old. He has to come with Thor to Midgard and help them get the apples back, for some reason. When he gets there he plays football with some local kids, using a dead warrior's head as ball (it grows back) and he gets a sword from the dwarves (elves) which glows and grows longer when there is danger nearby. I remember it was really fun but I can't find it

"Erik and the Gods: Journey to Valhalla" ("Erik Menneskesøn" in the original Danish).

There are several sequels, but I don't think they have been translated.

CrayZHorse
Apr 3, 2002
Glue!
I've got one that has had me looking forever:

A ninja and a samurai are battling one another. The only thing I remember is they both have to cross a battlefield. The ninja would fight his way through the battle while the samurai just meditated and calmly walked through.

CrayZHorse fucked around with this message at 04:08 on Jun 6, 2021

Beef Hardcheese
Jan 21, 2003

HOW ABOUT I LASH YOUR SHIT


Watching the lovely preview for "The Tomorrow War" reminded me of this story I've been meaning to find and re-read forever.

A veteran returns home to some vaguely defined point in our past. He had been recruited to fight in a war at the end of time against a parallel timeline, in a universe-spanning war. His side won, which ensures their existence, and survivors get to go home still equipped with their weapons which are basically superpowers they were given. The rule is "go home and live your life but don't use your powers". It's alluded that there are a small handful of people who manage to use their powers but not gently caress things up too bad, like Jesus and the Greek pantheon. The main character finds another veteran who is misusing his powers/weapons, and main character has to kill him. The main character beats him up easily in 3D real world meatspace, but the real damage is in the other dimensions and planes of existence where the "grafted" power weapons exist. The moment he unveils his true form to the bad guy he says "Holy poo poo, Colonel Bone! I had no idea it was you!"* and shits his pants because he realizes he's completely outclassed. The fight is one-sided and over quickly, but because time travel is involved and their weapons/powers involve time travel, this means he erases the bad guy from having ever existed. Which means he never fought in the war at the end of time, and since his absence could Butterfly-effect it's way into making them lose the war, the main character has to go back and re-fight the war because of this guy. And the end implies that this happens a lot because people can't stop being jerks with their powers.

*Half the reason I remember this story is the fact that the main character was named "Colonel Bone" and I was like 12 when I read it.

Edit: Of course I find it immediately after I post this and resume searching http://www.infinityplus.co.uk/stories/quietwar.htm

Edit 2:

Take the plunge! Okay! posted:

TA: rape as plot device in this one

Beef Hardcheese fucked around with this message at 20:40 on Jun 8, 2021

Saerdna
Aug 8, 2004

Biplane posted:

You sure this is a book and not a comic?
E: this is what your post immediately brought to mind: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valhalla_(comics)

No, but it seems interesting!

SimonChris posted:

"Erik and the Gods: Journey to Valhalla" ("Erik Menneskesøn" in the original Danish).

There are several sequels, but I don't think they have been translated.

This is it! Thanks, I've been looking for this for years.

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Jazz Marimba
Jan 4, 2012

Beef Hardcheese posted:

Watching the lovely preview for "The Tomorrow War" reminded me of this story I've been meaning to find and re-read forever.

A veteran returns home to some vaguely defined point in our past. He had been recruited to fight in a war at the end of time against a parallel timeline, in a universe-spanning war. His side won, which ensures their existence, and survivors get to go home still equipped with their weapons which are basically superpowers they were given. The rule is "go home and live your life but don't use your powers". It's alluded that there are a small handful of people who manage to use their powers but not gently caress things up too bad, like Jesus and the Greek pantheon. The main character finds another veteran who is misusing his powers/weapons, and main character has to kill him. The main character beats him up easily in 3D real world meatspace, but the real damage is in the other dimensions and planes of existence where the "grafted" power weapons exist. The moment he unveils his true form to the bad guy he says "Holy poo poo, Colonel Bone! I had no idea it was you!"* and shits his pants because he realizes he's completely outclassed. The fight is one-sided and over quickly, but because time travel is involved and their weapons/powers involve time travel, this means he erases the bad guy from having ever existed. Which means he never fought in the war at the end of time, and since his absence could Butterfly-effect it's way into making them lose the war, the main character has to go back and re-fight the war because of this guy. And the end implies that this happens a lot because people can't stop being jerks with their powers.

*Half the reason I remember this story is the fact that the main character was named "Colonel Bone" and I was like 12 when I read it.

Edit: Of course I find it immediately after I post this and resume searching http://www.infinityplus.co.uk/stories/quietwar.htm

this sounds cool as hell and i’m saving it for later

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