The identify that story/book thread: Home of the gas pump boy

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navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

I think I've tried this one before but didn't get anywhere.

I read it maybe 25 years ago. It's a sci-fi short story about a criminal of some kind who is critically injured when his stolen spaceship crashes on an uncharted planet. As his body, paralyzed except for partial movement of one arm lays there, it becomes an object of worship for a bunch of teeny tiny aliens who live at 100x speed, use the peeled skin from his sunburn as roofing material, his hair for strong rope, etc. At one point he is able to lift his arm and bring it crashing down on the enemies of the tribe that worships him.

At the end, they have evolved to the point of spaceflight and they build a statue to him.

If this isn't a real story, I want to know so I can write it and win a Hugo, cause in my brain it was awesome!

# ¿ Oct 24, 2009 05:41

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 20:44

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Telemaze posted:

I'm looking for a short story I found in an anthology a few years ago. In it, a person meets a stranger on a park bench, and the stranger begins telling the person how he is a refugee who was exiled from his homeland, which he can never return to because it is being run by a tyrant. The tyrant is insane and cruel but since he controls all the propaganda that gets out, he has misled everyone badly. It turns out that the exiled stranger is actually Lucifer.

Anyone know what I am talking about here? I may have some of the details wrong but I remember loving it when I read it.

It sounds similar to a story from "Smoke and Mirrors" by Neil Gaiman about a hobo on a park bench telling a story about being the Angel of Vengeance about the first murder in Heaven, which then causes Lucifer to fall. Maybe you're mixing up that one with something else.

# ¿ Oct 24, 2009 05:49

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

criptozoid posted:

It's Alan Dean Foster's Gift of a Useless Man.

AWESOME!! Thanks!

# ¿ Oct 24, 2009 22:07

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Cortel posted:

Second one was in the same literature book for high school (I think) was about this guy that had surgery to make him really smart, and there was a mouse that had the surgery a little bit before him and he fell in love with the female doctor and the mouse died and he revealed that to the scientific community. I later found out that the entire love sequence was edited out of the story, and I think it was actually a whole book. I think there was a movie too, because I'm remembering the part where he shows the dead mouse at the conference in a black and white film style from the 50s or something.

This would be Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes.

# ¿ Oct 28, 2009 06:06

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Xenix posted:

Heard about a book here in TBB, and cannot remember the title or author for the life of me. It was a sci fi novel about revenge. Guy is the only survivor on a wrecked spaceship, sees another ship from his company and sends a distress call, ship ignores him, and the guy vows revenge. If I remember right from the first chapter, he spoke with a cockney accent or something like that.

The Stars My Destination by Alfred Bester?

# ¿ Nov 17, 2009 02:33

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Well, that last bit IS from Fahrenheit 451. The people Montag meets after running away from the Hound all have memorized books to keep them intact for the future.

# ¿ Nov 24, 2009 21:34

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

PiratePing posted:

Actual historical events

Well, the first part is a narration of the actual events surrounding the disappearance of the Roanoke colony.

# ¿ Nov 27, 2009 20:44

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Pompous Rhombus posted:

Can't remember much of this, I think it was a 19th century epic poem about travel or a long journey of some kind that I was reading online a while ago and have since lost the title/URL of. Pretty sure it was originally in English (could be wrong) and set around Europe/the Mediterranean.

Er...this isn't a lot to go on, but as a WAG, how about The Rime of the Ancient Mariner, by Samuel Taylor Coleridge?

# ¿ Dec 19, 2009 22:08

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

This is an older story (30+ years, probably). The whole thing is a dialogue between two cops who are sitting in a stakeout looking for a plague carrier that they call "Johnny Plague" or something like that.

They go on and on with the exposition about how every few years somebody will pop up with some kind of horrible infectious disease and half the people in the world die from it.

At one point, one cop, to illustrate a point, pulls out a lighter and holds his hand in the flame for 10 seconds before wincing and pulling it away (the upshot being that the plagues have culled the weak from the human race and we are looking at what would be, compared to us, superhumans).

Anyway, if anybody knows title and author, I'd appreciate it.

# ¿ Feb 21, 2010 21:28

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Do Not Resuscitate posted:

Don't know about the other stuff, but the hankie/travel metaphor is the "wrinkle" in A Wrinkle In Time.

EDIT: I think I'm wrong about this -- sorry.

They have used it in half a dozen stories about folding space. Most recent example I can think of is actually a fantasy version. Rand and Egwene use it as a description of Traveling in the Wheel of Time series.

# ¿ May 10, 2012 06:45

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

hyperhazard posted:

I was trying to explain this book to someone the other day, and they just looked puzzled, but hopefully it'll ring a bell for someone here.

Back in high school, one my friends was big into Marvel and reading a lot of books and graphic novels about the X-men. I don't think the book I'm thinking of was about the X-men specifically, but it involved some people (teens maybe?) who were mutants, and all had a different set of powers. One guy in particular was pretty indestructible; I remember they (the bad guys?) had to kill him by strapping him down and suffocating him. Maybe a plastic bag over his head so he couldn't get any air? It was a drawn-out and gruesome death, unless my friend was exaggerating when he described it to me. If it was YA, it was pretty dark.

He offered to lend me the series (I think it was a series, or had a sequel at least), but I turned him down. Now it's driving me crazy.

fe: It's not Runaways, but the idea might have been similar. Also, I'm pretty sure it was a book, not a graphic novel.

Rising Stars, by J. Michael Straczynski. And it's a comic book series.

# ¿ May 26, 2012 06:09

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Phillip K. Dork posted:

There's also I Will Fear No Evil which features the transplant of the old man main character's brain into the body of his young female secretary as a main plot element.

I tried reading this once but couldn't get through it because by then I was aware that the main character in most any Heinlein book was just him and I couldn't stop thinking "you dirty dirty bastard".

Honestly though, it's just a little dull.

One of my favorite books by him, though, is Farnham's Freehold which features some great examples of Heinlein's most loved and hated themes writ large. It's not one of his best but it's a lot of fun and a quick read.

Essentially most of Robert Heinlein's books can be described as creepy to some degree, especially in this day and age.

Ah. Farnham's Freehold. Where the POV character's daughter asks him which she should do, miscegenation or incest...and he has to THINK about it before telling her that, while it's distasteful, she should bang the darkie. Priceless.

# ¿ Aug 11, 2012 18:32

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

brainfizz posted:

There's couple of books I read 20 years ago which amused my teenage self but would probably not be so good now. I'd like to find out what they were anyway:

The first book was about a group of people who got transported from a dungeons and dragons game they were playing to a fantasy world where the wizard blew up all their magic items on the first day and the thief got executed for stealing, and they managed to stay alive by using their knowledge of how to make gunpowder to make guns and carve out a kingdom for themselves.

The second book is another fantasy one but I can only remember that the heroes were hunting for a black and white amulet that altered chance around it so everyone was always incredibly lucky or unlucky as it saw fit.

Any ideas?

OOH! I get to win one! The first one is the Guardians of the Flame by Joel Rosenberg

# ¿ Sep 8, 2012 11:22

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

angelicism posted:

I asked about this in this thread years ago and apparently stumped everyone then, but I figured I'd try again:

I vaguely remember a short story, in a collection of short stories. Basically, it's in the future when mankind has colonized the moon, or Mars, or some other planet's moon (can't recall exactly). And the only bit I remember is that a boy is running home and his mother is waiting in the doorway yelling at him to hurry up because the "hail" (or something) is coming, and he needs to beat it home. He makes it either just in time or one just nicks him as he gets in. The next morning, there are trucks coming by to collect the "hail" on the ground and the mother says something about how she doesn't understand why the earth people want such junk. It's better implied that they're diamonds or precious gems or something.

I read this too. The boy was playing baseball with himself, and there was a button on the bat that recalled the ball to him. I want to say it was by Ben Bova.

# ¿ Dec 13, 2012 13:55

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

angelicism posted:

Really hope someone knows what it is, it's been driving me nuts for years, and it seems to be impossible to Google for.

It's funny because since I've been thinking about it, I remember more and more about it. The baseball glows because he can hit it so far in lower gravity, makes it easier to see. There's a siren that goes off, and he starts hauling rear end for the house. I think one of the diamonds cuts his shirt or his heel, but not his skin before he gets in the house. And he's all pissed at the end because his mom makes him go shovel the diamonds off the walk. I almost feel like it was in a middle school English text. And I would have read it almost 30 years ago, so it's definitely old.

# ¿ Dec 18, 2012 05:06

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Ok, tough one. Story in a super-hero anthology from maybe 15-20 years ago.

The POV is a superhero working with a group and his power is punching things hard by "flexing his arm in a special way only he can." He's a human-looking alien with a superman backstory. A woman obsessed with him discovers his secret identity, and he rejects her because he has no sexual interest in humans because they smell wrong and move wrong and he talks about how he almost starved as an infant before his foster mother found things he could eat. At the end, he says that if she exposes him or won't leave him alone, he'll kill her because he's only a hero to fit in and have something to do.

# ¿ Jan 11, 2013 19:18

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:

One of the Boys by Lawrence Watt-Evans, anthology called Superheroes. Came out in 95.

Wow. Just...wow. Thanks!

# ¿ Jan 12, 2013 00:36

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Benagain posted:

Aright, so there's a book about a second-generation Chinese-Canadian who goes back to China during the 70s and 80s to learn Chinese. It's something of an autobiography. I could've sworn it was called something like Red White and Blue all over but nothing's coming up. Anyone have any ideas?

Is it "Red China Blues" by Jan Wong?

# ¿ Feb 3, 2013 13:15

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

nucleicmaxid posted:

I'm trying to remember a fantasy story where they're in a modern day setting, but they travel through some portal (I want to think?) and end up in a magical-focused fantasy world. I remember there were two or three main characters, all fencers, two guys and a girl, one was dating the girl and the other's last name was Silverstein. The one who was dating the girl's dad was a famous duelist/fencer and there were like Baronies of Fire and maybe some other elements, but I couldn't tell you if they were Classical elements or Eastern ones.

Also they meet Freya? And, because I read it when I was young, I remember the dude who isn't Silverstein ends up loving his girlfriend in the bath, but they had to keep it a secret so people thought they were fighting (I was young and goony so that idea sticks out)?

Also the guy named Silverstein gets called 'Silverstone' a lot, and he uses the epee, so he 'always goes for the kill' or whatever and that lets him win in a fight with some fire-demon who had taken over the Fire Barony which made him King Jew or something. I don't remember. I think it was the first in a series, or a book that was to be made into a series (I have no idea if it was ever made into said series.)

edit: Also, was the series any good if someone has read them? I read the book AGES ago, like mid 90's so around 20 years ago.

The Hidden Ways series by Joel Rosenberg. As to quality, I shan't say. I thought they were boss when I was a teenager.

# ¿ Sep 6, 2013 13:59

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Gorbash posted:

Huh. Did he pull an Eddings on his "Guardians of the Flame" series, or are they sufficiently different?

Yeah, completely different. About the closest you get is some mental voice similarities between Ian Silverstein and Walter Slovotstky.

# ¿ Sep 16, 2013 11:46

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

GuyDudeBroMan posted:

My dad was a huge sci-fi fan his whole life and read pretty much every sci-fi book known to man. He had boxes and boxes of them in his garage. There is one that sticks out clearly in my mind from when I was a kid and I went back home after he died to try and find it, but by then my mom had thrown all the book away. I was hoping someone might be able to identify this book for me.

What I remember very clearly was the cover. It totally fascinated me as a kid. The cover was some big menacing and angry space alien that was basically an elephant looking humanoid and he was holding some kind of ray gun in his trunk. He may have even had two trunks. I think there was also a human man and maybe a woman too, hiding from the alien behind a crumbling wall.

The book was much too long and hard to read for me at the time since I was only like 8 years old, so I just flipped to the end and read the last couple pages. The story ended with the man standing triumphantly on the back of a dead space-elephant, holding the woman in his arms, as he reflects on the victory of planet Earth.

At least that's how I remember things. I could be off by a bit since it was almost 20 years ago when I saw this book. Any ideas what it might be? It was probably from the 80's or early 90's and it may have been a giant piece of poo poo. At least that's how I interpret it now what with its dumb cliche ending and cheesy cover and everything.

Footfall by Larry Niven and Jerry Pournell

# ¿ Sep 18, 2013 18:11

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Adar posted:

This was a short story from the 80's.

A man is trapped in an unhappy marriage. His wife is fat, one of his children committed suicide and the other is a deadbeat punk. He finds his dead son's old computer that he'd put together from a kit and starts typing something. As soon as he finishes a sentence, it comes true, but the computer can't stay on for long. Before it blows up, he uses it to kill off his bad son, resurrect the good one and marry somebody else.

Anyone remember this?

"Word Processor of the Gods" by Stephen King

# ¿ Jan 14, 2014 11:45

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

The Moon Monster posted:

I remember reading a fantasy series as a kid where the author described villains as "swarthy" so often that I thought it was a synonym for villainous. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? Possibly the Belgariad.

Anything by Edgar Rice Burroughs, H.P. Lovecraft, or before 1950?

# ¿ May 8, 2014 04:38

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

meanolmrcloud posted:

I've heard people here talk of a fantasy series that has a main character that is comically perfect and can do no wrong and it just a total bad rear end and it kind of ruins the book in its awfulness. There might have been talk of him owning a tavern in his dotage and he is recollecting the story. Is this book of the new sun? It was recommended to me but the name severian is setting off alarm bells of being warned against it.

If so, Is it really that bad?

If your friends have been warning you off The Book of the New Sun, get different friends.

# ¿ Jul 1, 2015 09:47

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

XBenedict posted:

It's kind of a late response, but I was browsing back in the thread and saw it was unanswered.

Is this the book you were seeking?

Or maybe "The Girl Who Would Be King?"

# ¿ Apr 25, 2016 03:02

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Ok, I read this back in the 80's, probably. This space-thief crash-lands on an alien planet, is thrown from his space-car and is space-paralyzed.

He lands near a colony of bug-sized aliens who end up worshipping him as a god because his bodily fluids end a drought and the peeling skin from his sunburn serve as roofing materials (I swear to god).

At one point, he manages to move his mostly paralyzed arm 6 inches to wipe out an invading bug tribe.

It ends with the bugs blasting off into space and there's a huge monument to him in the background as the founder of their civilization.

I got nothin

# ¿ Apr 26, 2016 20:37

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Captain Monkey posted:

Gift of a Useless Man by Allen Dean Foster.

This is it!! Thanks! Can't believe I didn't remember it was Alan Dean Foster!

# ¿ Apr 28, 2016 10:08

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Sunswipe posted:

Couple of books I've been trying to find the details of for about twenty years. I read both of them either late 80s or early 90s, probably written earlier than that, both sci-fi, both novel length, different authors.

First one I don't remember much about. I think it was the final part of a trilogy. It was set in space, I think the future, had all the usual FTL and lasers trappings. Fairly sure the hero was fighting against an evil empire/federation/something like that. His family had been killed and he'd been left horribly injured. Part of healing him had involved giving him Wolverine-style indestructible metal skeleton. Main thing I remember is that at one point he was captured and placed in a straitjacket-like restraint that tightened a bit each time the person in it struggled. To escape, he kept struggling until the thing tightened so much it would be killing a normal person, then feigned unconsciousness, at which point the guards assumed it was malfunctioning and took it off him.

I don't remember the straitjacket, but that's the Last Legionary series by Douglas Niles.

# ¿ Jul 2, 2016 17:47

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

franco posted:

Here's one that has been bugging me for a very long time. I would have read it in the early-mid 90's when I would binge anything vaguely horror-y from the library. I think it was from some c-list horror author (think Shaun Hutson/Dean Koontz tier) but it may have been a nobody.

The gist: a series of brutal, realistic horror films is proving popular, all produced by a studio that nobody really knows anything about. The main actor or the director (can't quite recall) is called something like Max Shreck or Max Orlok (obviously both after the Nosferatu actor/character). Our hero goes to see one and is either deaf of can just lip-read anyway and realises that these are actual murders on the screen by what one of the women is saying (the original voice track has been removed/over-dubbed). He sets out to investigate and, I think, manages to save the next victim.

Not sure if it was a novel/novella or a short story, but I do remember it being rather good.

Please help, constant readers!

This is ringing a bell. Was it something from the Sonja Blues stories by Nancy Collins? Or was it mission in Vampire the Masquerade video game?

# ¿ Aug 12, 2016 12:24

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Barbe Rouge posted:

One of the Generation V books by M.L. Brennan.

These are actually pretty good

# ¿ Aug 20, 2016 03:52

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Barbe Rouge posted:

Yes they are, IMO.
Too bad the publisher isn't interested in books 5 & 6.

Ugh, is THAT why there's nothing about a 5th book??

# ¿ Aug 22, 2016 20:17

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Pham Nuwen posted:

I seem to remember an older science fiction story about how the existence of 'color' was some sort of... viral or mimetic transmission? So previously everything was black and white but then eventually people started seeing color? I've tried googling it but only get lists of people of color who've written science fiction.

There was a Calvin and Hobbes where Calvin's dad explained that's the way the world worked in the B&W movie era...

# ¿ Dec 14, 2016 10:10

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Meanie posted:

I'm trying to find a book, I think the author posted here some years ago or you guys found him out and it was somewhat popular for a while.
I think it was written (and published) in "installments".

It was a story about a dude who inherited a house/old mansion from an auntie.
It had ghosts, necromancing, super natural lawyers and all kinds of poo poo.
I seem to remember that he "caught" a ghost and imprisoned her inside a hatchet or something like that.
He couldn't go out from the property ground or else.

Well, I know that it's a long shot but I hope someone remembers it.

Thanks!

That is "Pact" by Wildbow. Same guy that did "Worm." It's not a book, but a web-serial.

# ¿ Mar 5, 2017 11:33

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

chernobyl kinsman posted:

i dont know what book you're talking about im just invested in the relationship

I need closure!

# ¿ May 29, 2017 01:58

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Less Fat Luke posted:

Also sounds a bit mixed in with the Eschaton stuff from his earlier Iron Sunrise series - but yes, what a great read.

Any idea where I can find an ebook? Only seeing hard copy on Amazon

# ¿ Jul 8, 2017 04:50

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Poldarn posted:

The Fallout series has ghouls call normal humans "smooth skins", but that's all I got. Their wikia says they use the term "smoothie" as well but that must have been one of the games I didn't play.

The Moreau books by S Andrew Swan had the uplifted animals calling humans "pinks" but I seem to recall them saying smooth or smoothie as an insult too.

# ¿ Aug 2, 2017 21:34

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Sanford posted:

A colleague and I both remember a book with a female character who will only have anal sex, claiming that in her youth she masturbated with a glass bottle which shattered and left her with terrible scars. It transpires she's actually transgender and I think had botched surgery. Don't think this was a key element of the plot, just an aspect we both remember.

Edit: we think it's probably Acid House by Irvine Welsh.

# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 09:17

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Alopex posted:

I'm looking for a sci-fi book that I think recently came out, I read a preview of it and then forgot the title.

The premise was that there was an outer space expedition and the POV character was some kind of killbot around to protect the scientists and who had hacked its typical 3-laws programming, but also wanted to just do its job and protect the humans, only out of free will. I remember it spending its free time downloading movies to watch, and also getting partway melted while saving people and shrugging it off because it could fix itself easily.

Murderbot Diaries by Martha Wells

# ¿ Aug 9, 2017 20:17

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Lemniscate Blue posted:

Steven Barnes practices a whole shitload of martial arts, I'd be surprised if some variety of Kung Fu wasn't among them.

Yeah, this is probably Stephen Barnes. The one where the MC is a null-gee boxer, maybe?

# ¿ Oct 9, 2017 02:18

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# ¿ Apr 26, 2024 20:44

navyjack: Jul 15, 2006

Nebrilos posted:

Wow, that was a fast reply. Thank you!

It�s a genre classic, one of the all-time greats. Read it soon

# ¿ Dec 3, 2017 21:42

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > The Book Barn > The identify that story/book thread: Home of the gas pump boy

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