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Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


I have dealt with my wikipedia article's nomination for deletion (I'll be a monkey's uncle if I let them take my legacy down for nothing!) I think I can handle this Helldump thing.
Every time you bring up a thing I've done, I am going to COUNTER it by casually mentioning something else I've done, or an article written about me, a picture of my grilfriend, or the number of friends I have on facebook. I might even write a song insulting some of you and play it on GBSfm AND the Dr. Demento show. You'll all be sorry.

First of all, I think some of you might be quite embarrassed to know that you've gotten certain aspects of my life factually incorrect. For example, my band (Lemon Demon) now has a drummer and a second guitarist. Secondly, that particular venue is not an old lady's backyard but the backyard of the family of my bassist, my best friend who is also homeschooled. We preform there on a yearly basis with an event called "Lemonic Demonade" followed by the year number, and this year over one hundred people showed up, some from far away states such as Vermont.

Secondly, I did not write my own wikipedia article, and you can clearly see this by checking the history and seeing all the many names of many different men and women who've taken an interest in setting the facts straight on my life.

Moving on, I think some of you might be quite interested to know that I'm not just a celebrity on YouTube and other such comunities, but here on your Something Awful as well. I suppose you all remember Ebaums World Dot Com, a song I wrote in the spirit of Low Tax's vendetta against Eric Bauman, whom if I recall correctly stole some images from Something Awful without permission (much like you are all stealing images from me without premission. (I will be making a note of all of your usernames, by the way.))

It was the flash animation created by forum user Altf4 (now known as Reporter Consumer) for that song that began our friendship and lead to our next creation: The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny, a flash animation and song combo that definitely sent some shockwaves thruogh the Something Awful community-- if I recall correctly, LowTax even made an exception to his recently passed ban on ChuckNorris jokes (this was 2005, which I notice some of you weren't even around for) and the thread went Gold.

I've also had several Photoshops featured in front page articles, and even one or two threads I started featured or gold mined! So as, you can see I'm not just another dime in a dozen goon, I'm a force with whom to be reckoned. If you make any feable attempts at Helldumping me, my bassist, my sister, or my girlfriend, I will just roll with the punches, and then I just might punch back-- hard.

Trapezoid fucked around with this message at Oct 21, 2008 around 12:59

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Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


I'm not sure sure you really do appreciate it

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Ferrule posted:

so what you're saying is that the ultimate showdown thing was where you peaked comedically?

because that thing was sort of funny the first time i saw it but you ain't done squat in 3 years.

also, your band playing in someone's parent's backyard does no make a concert nor a festival. it's just that particular parent letting you crazy kids work through this phase
Not at all, wherein Ultimate Showdown only garnered a handful of millions of hits on Newgrounds.com, the Potter Puppet Pals video "The Mysterious Ticking Noise" has accumulated over 53 million hits on YouTube (not to mention a YouTube award and a trip to New York where I went on a press tour and appeared on Good Morning America and Fox News, alongside Tay Zonday... perhaps you've heard of him?)

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Actually, I would have to say that the pinnacle of my life was at ROFLcon in the middle of my performance when I looked out to the back of the crowd and saw Tron Guy glowing in the darkness.

I have also met Felicia Day, Sgt. Slaughter, Weird Al Yankovic and both Johns from They Might Be Giants. You might say that fame attracts fame!

I also met Colin Mochrie and gave him a tee-shirt featuring an image from Hyakugojyuuichi!!, my hit 2001 flash animation (featured on Fark.com)

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Technically speaking I have been unschooled, which is probably the main reason I have developed the skills and talents I have now. My fame has also netted me two girlfriends, neithre of whom have minded that I live with my family and ten cats (in fact they find the cats rather cute!)

As for my sister, she goes by Bindi on the forums here, and she's a very talented artist often featured on deviantart.com. Sorry but she doesn't regularly attend renaissance faires

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


[would you rather thread die?]

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Okay knock knock

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


banana

edit: orange you glad I didn't say banana

Trapezoid fucked around with this message at Oct 21, 2008 around 14:24

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


My experiences in being famous on the internet have taught me many things, but one of the things they've taught me is how to deal with the haters.
1. Sometimes they're just covering up their own insecurities and it's best to just leave them be, 2. Fight back by keeping a cool and rational head, exhert your superiority, 3. Cold hard numbers and facts are your ammunition in the war against haters and trolls, they can't stand to be told the truth about a target whose objectively a better person than they are, [b]4. Sometimes you gotta play along and throw out some jokes in a similar fashion to the way they talk, such as poor spelling and grammar, lower caps lettering, and the occasional self-afflicting humor.
I told you guys! You can't hurt my feelings no matter how hard you try, because I've dealt with far worse taunting in my every day life.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


I was in public school until approximately 5th gade when my parents took me out, but the taunting and bullying I braved never particularly bothered me and in fact I can scarcely remember much of it at all. Nothing anybody said really got through to me because I had a rich world of art and PC adventure games I could escape into. I impressed quite a few teachers and even had a drawing of a haunted house I drew featured on the wall at the local mall, and with these cold hard facts in my mind at all times I was able to play it cool when people tried to get under my skin.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


raditts posted:

cold hard facts are useless without LOGIC

seriously though, why the gently caress did you make a wikipedia article about yourself, that's just inexcusable
I told you I didn't, in fact my only substantial edit to the Neil Cicierega wikipedia article was to greatly prune the amount of unneccesary detail that my fans had added. While I know that I have created and done many notable things, Wikipedia has standards that must be upheld.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Ferrule posted:

you were taken out of school in the 5th grade because the taunting DID get to you, idiot. Mommy didn't want her poor little shnookums getting picked on anymore.

So they enrolled you in home-school during the most important point in your life for physical, emotional and social development. This is why the internet is your life and you have three friends and think meeting the guy who invented LOLcats is a like having an audience with the pope.


By all accounts I bullying did not particularly upset me, it's said that I was a very quiet child who showed no signs of trauma whatsoever. I would also have to attest to the fact that my greatest moments in life have been in real life, at events such as live performances of my band, movie screenings of my short films, and live performances of my puppet shows. I also have a very fulfilling $20+ dollars an hour job working for Plymouth Rock Studios, a fledging major film studio in Massachusetts. There are many important people here at the office, and I have been instrumental in a pitch for an Animorphs motion picture that is being seriously considered (they've made calls to Scholastic and everything.) I also sell many CDs online, a fact which many of you have surley missed.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Ferrule posted:

If you weren't traumatized as a child by all the bullying then what's with the desperate cries for attention form the internet?

Also: lol @ $20 and hour.
Granted, I only work three days a week, but that's just about all I can bare being out of the house all day. Between maintaing my email inbox, my band's forums, my several MySpace pages, my Wikipedia article, and the Something Awful forums, I barely have time to socialize.

Ninja edit: I forgot to mention working on new songs, videos, and animations! Those eat up a lot of precious time too.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Heh heh jokes on you guys, since this thread went up I've sold a few dozen CD's and t-shirts. You know like they say, there's no such thing as negative attention!

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Look people you aren't going to get through to me no matter how many LIES you spout out of your pathetic trash mouthes. No my mom does not buy any of my CD's or shirts, in fact they are purchased by fans of many different creeds and colors from all across the word. The fact that I am unschooled is merely a testament to the fact that I have been able to overcome my many short comings and obstacles in life. What you people dont understand is that people love me for who I am and that's all a preson can ask for out of life. Perhaps someday in a feat of alcoholism and self-depression you will realize this and appologize.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Ferrule posted:

Post Receipts from the dozens of CDs and Shirts sold since this thread went up.
I refuse to give up the presonal information of my fans so you rear end holes can try to ruin their lives, nice try.

quote:

Dear Lemon Demon:

Once again, cdfreedom has eliminated the middleman and sold one of your products
straight to your fans. The order information was emailed to the customer as
shown below:

Customer Email: paauljkn@yahoo.com.au

Your order has been shipped as follows:

Bill To:
******************
(******************@*******.com.au)
03 9375 2735
******************
Essendon, Victoria
Australia
3040

Ship To:
******************
******************
Essendon Victoria
Australia
3040

===========================================
Quantity: 1 (96 units left in stock)
Artist: Lemon Demon
Title: drat Skippy - CD
Unit Price: $10.00
Subtotal: $10.00

===========================================
Quantity: 1 (118 units left in stock)
Artist: Lemon Demon
Title: Hip to the Javabean - CD
Unit Price: $10.00
Subtotal: $10.00

===========================================
Quantity: 1 (517 units left in stock)
Artist: Lemon Demon
Title: Dinosaurchestra - CD
Unit Price: $11.00
Subtotal: $11.00

===========================================
Quantity: 1 (394 units left in stock)
Artist: Lemon Demon
Title: View-Monster - CD
Unit Price: $11.00
Subtotal: $11.00

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Thanks Zorro

I refer to my animations as surrealist and surealism because that is the attribution they have recieved many times in the past. I am far from the only one to write of my animated works, its well known fact.

Also for the last time I didn not write my own Wikipedia article the simple fact of the matter is that it was written by fans, QED. Stop making use of this line of attack for it' is simply not gonna work bucko. Don't you get it through your thick skull?

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


I don't like to advertize my membership to the Something Awfulforums to my fans, many of them are underage and S.A. is well known for being not for children. I'm sure some of you are also secretely fans playing along because you know of my well known sense of humor.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


ZORRO CRUMB SHOULDER posted:

i'm going to level with you bro i've never seen a single thing you've done like a video or listened to a song or anything... i just know from your pictures on ayb and apparently you got a handjob from some chick or something. thats like all i know about you. but you seem kinda gay.
We were actually just joking around for A.Y.B., she was my long distance relation ship but we visited each other and I'll just say it went a little beyond hangjobs

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Randbrick posted:

you rule, neil! you should socialize with more people your age though!
I do! I've three great friends: Kevin and Ryan who are around my age and we make some great videos and skits together. Perhaps you've heard of "New Kids on the Rock", the web-serious we make for the afore mentioned movie studio. Its very character based humor, BUT the charactures are based on our real personalities!

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


ZORRO CRUMB SHOULDER posted:

do you parents know you have a se x dungeon in the basement
Actually speaking, all that's in my basement is the bandpractice room. Where we are currently practising to gear up for Youmacon 2008, an anime convention (we don't really watch anime but don't tell them that!) in Detroit, MO who flies us out and pays for our hotel rooms just because they enjoy my music so much. It's very VIP treatment, a feeling some of you may never feel.
The other room in my basement is sort of an extented closet full of my many costumes and prop. Most of it is for making my videos, they definitely come in handy alot. It is not for attention like you so repugnancy claim.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Lucius Seianus posted:

how ironic im studying for an abnormal psychology exam while browsing the forums and you fit every goddamn symptom of narcissism i can find in my textbook.
I've been to a doctor and have had no such diseases prescribed to me, so it would seem to me that you're are full of poo poo, no pun in tended. He also said my weight is perfectly normal.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


The cattery business is no more, it was fun while it lasted but the cats are just pets now, no longer "employees"

spacepirate posted:

Do you have any plans for some sort of career? Like becoming an accountant or something?

Or are you just waiting for those internet youtube checks to come rolling in?
Perhaps you've heard of the YouTube Partner program which exchanging ad revenue for cold hard money. Being as i'm one of the top most subscribed channels on YouTube, this translates in to fairly hefty monthly checks streight from YouTube's pockets.

Sorry folks I gotta go to lunch. Working hard here at the studio. Feel free to browse my many videos and songs on eviltrailmix.com while I am gone enjoying the fruits of my laboring.

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


I'm back

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Look I love my parents and siblings very much and I don't mind living with them so stfuckup

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


my mom saw the thread and got pretty mad so I am going to have to stop posting here for a while.



-Neil

Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


Turn left Dale!! Noo posted:

hey this is a dumb and lovely transparent fakepost you robotic chicken armed retard but you really should tell your mom to come in here so i can probe her cunty goodness with my wizard staff
are you saying my other posts weren't transparent

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Trapezoid
Apr 28, 2004

by T. Finn


I have thought long and hard about which direction I am going to take this thread in and I have come to the decision that

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