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The best ticket I've ever seen was escalated to me by on of our completely idiotic support desk people--whom I've since gotten fired. Status: Escalated Technician: monkeybounce Category: Router/Switch SubCategory: VLAN Modification Computer: USERNAME-WS Subject: [] User reports that he can not sit comfortably in chair. Requesting new chair like one in [conference room] Enteredby:SupportMoron Now, when a name is selected in our ticketing software, the Category box populates with those areas in which we are proficient in order to prevent ticket mis-routing. So, not only did someone actually request a new chair from our IT department, but the moron in support escalated it to me as a Router/Switch change? Also, the chairs in the conference room are all high back leather executive chairs... As a quick derail: Do you guys ticket by user or ticket by machine?
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Dec 10, 2008 02:00
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Midelne posted:I pointed out that everyone in the company who has an email address is firstnamelastname@company.com. Now I think she just hates me. Ours is firstname.lastname@company.com For some reason, no one can figure it out. If your email is joe.shmuk@company.com, the guy next to you isn't going to be "sexybabe123@company.com". We used to have it that login names were first.last also, so many people complained about having to type so much that when we migrated domains, we changed it to first name and 7 letters of the last name. Now people complain that their email address isn't the same--and they still try to login with first.last over a year later... 
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Jan 23, 2009 20:59
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Midelne posted:Universal recommendation for all companies everywhere: Universal recommendation for all companies everywhere: If you have to give out a laptop, don't give admin privileges to anyone but IT. (But I do have to agree with you on the no sales thing too. I've ended up ordering more laptops for Sales than the rest of the company combined.)
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Feb 24, 2009 20:18
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Midelne posted:Our Sales department is the only department that doesn't have local admin rights on their laptops. The others run proprietary programs that don't work unless you're a local admin, but Sales has no reason to need it so they don't get it. I've got a theory on this actually. It's because the people in the dirty environment use the computers to get their jobs done. Whereas Sales uses their computers to do their jobs. The guy working with grease and solvents is using his computer for a quick thing and doesn't really care what it's doing so long as it does what he needs it to do. Sales, on the other hand, relies so heavily on their computers that they feel they can "fix" it or "tweak" it to make their lives easier. They don't treat them as tools like the guy in the shop does. Also, even if there are proprietary programs that require admin rights (and the authors of those programs should be shot), there are other ways to work it. Use procmon and regmon to find out what those programs are accessing and provide elevated permissions to only those registry keys,folders,etc. It's a bit of a pain in the rear end, but once you know how the program works, just create a simple batch file and CACLs everything everytime the program is installed. Xenomorph posted:We'd get a LOT more calls if the sales people didn't have admin rights. They'd bitch and whine about not being able to install stuff. What do they need to install that IT hasn't already given them? And no, I will not accept "free smilies screensaver", Skype, or AIM as acceptable. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 21:15 on Feb 24, 2009 |
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Feb 24, 2009 20:50
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go3 posted:client called me with an e-mail problem. i stopped by, and sure enough its prompting for username/password. called him to get his password. These are some of the best tickets. When I was working level 1, they always made me chuckle because you could literally hear the unintentional "oooh" as they draw in the breath of dawning, then the bashful "thanks" before they quickly hang up the phone. I always liked to imagine these kinds of people suddenly "get" why IT can be cranky as gently caress sometimes.
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Apr 3, 2009 15:47
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Nuke posted:
gently caress me. I never knew just Prtscrn worked. I've always used CTRL + Prtscrn. I've only been in it for the greater part of a decade... vvvv Edit: Yeah, I knew about Alt Print Screen. I just never knew Print Screen worked on its own. I think it was one of those things I was told once "Press Ctrl + PrtScr" and never thought twice about it. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 21:16 on Apr 9, 2009 |
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Apr 9, 2009 20:46
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>> Just print screen.
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Keep in mind that the company I work for closed down on 4/3 and everyone was laid off. My boss and I are here to turn everything off, unrack servers, and recycle equipment. Everything is shut off, servers are gone, switches are recycled. (What up direct patch to a gigabit line  )Anyway, I just got this email this morning. loving idiot posted:Hey, why didn't anyone tell us our [company] email was going to go away? I've lost all the contacts on my phone and my calendar. It's imperative that you get these back for me now! I don't even know how to respond. He knew we were closing down. He knew everything was going away. I sent out scads of emails saying "Backup your contacts if you've synced your phone." "Backup all your personal files" etc. Now he wants me to get his contacts from a server that is no longer in the building and even if it were, I swapped disks on all of them to intentionally break the arrays. And it's been 7 loving days since you left. Ninja Edit: I moved email to Google Apps for the last few days just in case and now profoundly regret that decision.
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Apr 10, 2009 18:53
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Variable 5 posted:Fixed? It's not a bug. I think he means the BUSH HID THE FACTS bug not the .LOG trick.
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Apr 22, 2009 04:21
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nullandvoid posted:EDIT: My buddy says a good punishment would be a Simpson's-esque, stand in front of a chalkboard, writing over and over "I will not turn off the DC to make the internet go faster." If this guy has the level of access to shutdown or power off the DC, then a good punishment should be termination. And given the size of the office, I'm assuming there's no secondary DC?
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Aug 12, 2009 20:07
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nullandvoid posted:or VPs and up get those. I see your company doesn't follow the "and IT" rule exception. Every place I've worked has had policies similar to yours--only VPs and up get this or that, but IT has always been the exception. Then again the places I've worked have been pretty cool about acknowledging our need for certain things. Regardless, I bet you'll get a key now.
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Aug 17, 2009 18:44
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IT Administrator here. Not quite sure what it really means, but it entails me taking care of every loving thing. Does some jackass in HR just add IT or System with random other words and make up titles for us? To contribute to the thread... Our new office manager decided that we needed to completely re-record the phone tree messages. I've only been here two months, have 10000 other projects on my hands, and have never dealt with a Nortel system and it had to be done NOW! Since she was new, and it was mentioned by the owner of the company, I figured I'd help her out and try to get her some new-person kudos. Cue me spending three hours trying to figure out which message plays where and what to punch in on the keypad to get to those messages. Charting it out for her, and then sitting with her and pressing the actual keys as she records the messages. Now honestly, I'd say figuring out a system I hadn't touched before and getting everything changed in 3 hours is pretty loving good. The day after I get called into my boss's office.  Bimbo was in here about the phone system ok... She wants you to have a review. She doesn't think you know what you're doing. Um, why? The phone tree is working, right? Everything is good. Yeah, it's fine. She's complaining that you had to look things up in the manual. Essentially, because I needed to look at documentation for poo poo, means I don't know how to do my job.
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Oct 1, 2009 20:29
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rolleyes posted:She sounds like the kind of manager who blazes into an outfit thinking they're hot poo poo and are ready to "cut out the dead wood" using their "outside perspective", only to alienate and/or constructively dismiss all of the good staff (i.e. the ones who call her on her bullshit) and the sit a festering pile of a company wondering what went wrong. That's precisely the kind of manager she is. I've dealt with her lot before. Fortunately, the developers and myself are ruled by the owner/founder. We answer to him. At least that's what he told me when Bimbo complained about me. And considering he already gave me a raise after less than 2 months working here... I think I'm good.
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Oct 1, 2009 20:41
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AlexDeGruven posted:If your boss bought into the BS bimbo fed him, then it's time to flee, quickly. He didn't. Like I said, the tech team answers to the owner of the company. He's a developer and knows that Google (documentation) is your best friend. As an aside, Bimbo came to me this morning because she was getting an error with GoToMeeting. I asked her what the error was and her response was "I don't know, can't you see it?" She's going to be a fun one... monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 16:32 on Oct 2, 2009 |
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Oct 2, 2009 16:29
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m2pt5 posted:If prople are too stupid to use the shift key, how do they type capital letters or even most basic punctuation? You haven't spent much time on the internet, have you? Most of the messages I get are as follows: help the thingy with the whatsit is no longer working. fix it11111 Or just look at standard myspace page/facebook/forum/etc. Wow, that was painful to type. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 23:38 on Oct 6, 2009 |
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Oct 6, 2009 23:34
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ab0z posted:Well it looks like this is now about beer and lube.... That actually sums up IT work pretty well. Take it up the rear end when something goes wrong and get drunk afterward.
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Oct 9, 2009 19:07
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Ensign Expendable posted:There was a log or screenshot a while ago with a 5 answer time. The user responded after an hour. I've set an autoresponder on my messenger to tell people to open a ticket if there's a problem. I'm the lone IT guy in my company. Basically, when I started, there was nothing but a bunch of computers connected to a T3 though one persons computer using ICS.  Needless to say, I've been busy.Unfortunately, I still get messages like this: <user> Hey, you there... <autoresponder> If you're having a tech related problem, please put in a ticket. The ticketing systems whines at me and eventually I'll get annoyed enough to take care of you. If you just want to chat, keep typing. <user> It's not for a ticket, promise. <me> What's up? <user> Hey, real quick, I can't print to the color printer, can you fix that for me? <me> ...
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Oct 12, 2009 16:34
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coyo7e posted:But of course it's not about a ticket, he got you to work around opening one. This is users training you to accept their bad habits. Except I hold my ground and still make them put in a ticket. It does seem silly to have a ticketing system for the tiny number of users I have, but without it, I'd have requests coming to me in all directions.
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Oct 12, 2009 20:30
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Spermy Smurf posted:A salesman working on commission. Actually, that's pretty much EXACTLY what happened. Just change the 7 to a 5. I've only got around 20 some users. Woohoo startup. We've got an office and a datacenter. The datacenter was built out by contractors, but to the specs of a bunch of developers. My first three weeks here were spent running around going "Guys, why is our domain controller for the datacenter on a public IP?" "Why is IIS running under the administrator account with the password "Webacct?" "Why are we allowing all traffic from untrust to trust?" "No, Antivirus 2009 is NOT a good antivirus program." I'm the only person here that has any clue on infrastructure. I don't mean that to be self aggrandizing, but it's true. I had to put the ticketing system in place for the simple fact that between figuring out that X can't print because Y's computer is off, securing the business bread and butter, and getting some semblance of a network in the office, I just don't have time for people to come to me with one offs. I have plenty of time to take care of the issues, but when I'm trying to stop serving "HARRY_pOTTeR_HBP_Team_REleaSe.divx" from the webserver, I can't really deal with the fact that Z can't connect to AIM. It's much easier for me and my sanity to pound out tickets in the morning and evening when no one is here than to do it midday when I'm trying to take care of major issues. It's kind of like the build up/wind down of my day. I do take care of my users during the day, but it's easier to do it on my time--for now--and I think I'm doing a good job of teaching them what accounts for an emergency. Edit: As for ticketing software, I'm using Bugzilla. It's not really designed for trouble tickets, but it got me some major brownie points when my boss realized the developers could use it. I've got it set, and the users know, that if it's an issue for the website to put BUG: in the subject and an issue for me, to put IT: in the subject. Bugzilla automatically filters the IT: ones to me and lets the developers deal with the BUG: ones. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 22:34 on Oct 12, 2009 |
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Oct 12, 2009 22:22
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coyo7e posted:This is why I work 8-4pm, rather than 9-5pm.. Night shi(f)t. Right now, I'm working the 8-7pm shift. 
monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 22:33 on Oct 12, 2009 |
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Oct 12, 2009 22:29
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g3k posted:We use Numara's TrackIT! It is a beast of a system. Thanks for pointing out spiceworks, we're looking into that now instead Christ almighty, I hate Track-IT!. Every loving functionality is an additional license. That stupid inventory agent blows monkey rear end. There's no way to logically sort inventory. The ticketing system defaults to your last selection either Save or Save and Close. Yes, I just closed a ticket. No, I just want to save this one. Not to mention the daily bouncing of the email monitoring service, if it even decides to deliver emails more than once an hour. Getting SLAs and LDAP integration is beyond impossible. I actively try to talk people out of Track-IT! monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 15:38 on Oct 13, 2009 |
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Oct 13, 2009 15:35
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Nybble posted:
Um, who said it isn't? I get ROFL, LOL, PITA, ping, hehe, and afk on a daily basis. One sales guy actually puts an internal OOO reply up everytime he walks away from his computer that says "AFK. BRB." I swear to god I want to cut him.
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Oct 20, 2009 19:24
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porktree posted:I get my fair share of sales calls, and one of my favorite ways to deal with them is to transfer them to someone else. Our phone system lets you check on the hold message and music being played by pressing *86. It will just start playing over the speaker or handset and never end until you disconnect the call. Incidentally, you can also transfer someone to *86.
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Oct 21, 2009 15:50
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Not a ticket per se, but goddamn did it piss me off.bimbo posted:Hey Monkeybounce, And, I'm sure your company of over 400 employees allowed admin access to everything. In her defense, I did forget to remove the regkey for the Adobe updater, but drat woman, the way to loosen the need for so much administrative intervention is to stop loving trying to download "Kittens2009.zip.scr". And as to what she means about not deleting files? <her>There's a folder I want to get rid of. <me> What's it called? <her> <Username\>Documents. I have another folder called documents on my desktop and I keep getting confused. <me> That's part of the operating system. It needs to be there. <her> Oh, well can you change the name? <me> *sigh...* E: For clarification. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 23:45 on Oct 26, 2009 |
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Oct 26, 2009 22:04
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stubblyhead posted:I'm not going to argue that she should be putting those in her My Documents folder in the first place, but it is by no means required to be on the desktop. You misunderstand. She keeps confusing: C:\users\username\Documents - System Folder, replaces My Documents in Vista/2k8/7 with C:\users\username\Desktop\documents - User created folder. And wants me to delete/rename C:\users\username\documents
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Oct 26, 2009 23:43
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stubblyhead posted:No, I understood you the first time. My point is that the My Documents folder is not required to be on the desktop, unless this changed in Vista. Ah, I get what you're saying now. I guess I wasn't clear. She has a folder on her desktop called Documents that she created herself. That's all that's on her desktop. She would get confused when saving from IE or word or something where Vista defaults to <UserProfile> and shows you Music/Pictures/Documents/Desktop/etc. Instead of clicking on Desktop, she would click on Documents and then freak out when she saw the little "This folder is empty". That's where she wanted me to remove the Documents folder from. But this story gets even better as I found out last night. She takes care of a lot of overflow for the different departments. Data-entry and clerical kind of things, so she has access to a couple different team drives so she can take care of things as people ask her to. In this Documents folder, she copies all the files she'll work on for the day to the folder, edit them, then replace them on the drive at the end of the day. I found this out after a frantic call from our accountant swearing he saved the excel file containing all the updated vendor information only to find the original one never changed. Thank god for VSS. I think I'm going to replace her computer with a typewriter. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 16:43 on Oct 27, 2009 |
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Oct 27, 2009 16:38
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Arsten posted:If you know what's good for you, you won't ever bring this up. drat right on that. I've only ever met one Cell phone admin that was actually worth something and she started off as a receptionist. Somehow over the years, she went from supporting the cell phones for about 10 people to over 10,000 different phone numbers, countless handsets, air cards, etc. At any given time, she had two ear pieces on, someone on speaker, and two other active calls sitting on her desk. I swear to god she had a CDMA mind meld. It was always funny to listen in on her calling Sprint. She knew their system better than the tech she was calling.
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Nov 2, 2009 20:14
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Dragyn posted:Not the case at GS at all. I promise. Definitely not the fixing hardware issues part. To contribute: <Dev guy>: Exchange is telling me I'm over my limit. <Me>: Did you clear out your folders per the instructions I sent a couple weeks ago? <Dev guy>: Yeah. Inbox, Sent, deleted are all about 50 megs each. <Me>: How big's your junk? This wasn't done on IM or via Email. This was done by me shouting over my shoulder to the guy behind me. The entire office froze for a second then started laughing hysterically. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 21:42 on Nov 4, 2009 |
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Nov 4, 2009 21:33
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Iron Chef Ricola posted:What industry do you work in? That's hilarious. When I was working at a College, this happened quite frequently, actually. They would cut the cords as retaliation when they found out that the computer/receiver/projector they were trying to steal was locked up or epoxied to something. (Don't ask me why we epoxied poo poo to desks, I'll never be able to give a good answer.)
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Nov 6, 2009 01:08
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Midelne posted:That's actually kind of horrifying that it would consider the username at all when the SID is right there. I seem to recall a TechNet magazine article addressing this at one point. It's actually due to the similarities between Workgroup and AD authentication. Workgroup auth works by allowing User access to PC1 and PC2 so long as the account name and password is the same. If I remember correctly, it's desired functionality. I know it's saved me some headaches a few times. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 19:03 on Nov 9, 2009 |
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Nov 9, 2009 19:00
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Sunblood posted:The Pharmacy POS software we use has a lot of popups that are unnecessary at the cash register stage. As soon as I started working I wrote a tiny AutoIt script to catch certain popups and close them out immediately. Boss loves it because high school age clerks don't keep nagging him when it pops up with all the other prescriptions someone has every time you beep in a new one. Isn't the point of that so the pharmacist/tech can see it and say "You're taking X and the Dr. prescribed you Y. That will cause death/dismemberment/etc". I'm not so sure that's one that should be disabled for convenience. Or is it just disabled on the cash registers?
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Nov 9, 2009 21:48
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Wreckus posted:Luckily I didn't have to call this person. My company is working out a trade deal with a certain software company. The Sales person on our end kept referring to See-quell, asp, and 7 Windows. It was hilarious listening to the reps giggling on the other end.
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Nov 9, 2009 23:19
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Bozworthy 3.0 posted:What kind of poo poo company do you work for that doesn't have Powerpoint installed by default? Seriously. My users would murder me if I somehow managed to exclude Powerpoint from the Office install. Not to mention, isn't powerpoint included in all the suites so you'd have to actively prevent it from installing. Publisher, on the other hand, I understand. Edit: Just got an email. quote:From: User I really want to see what over 100% usage looks like. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 21:36 on Nov 19, 2009 |
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Nov 19, 2009 21:33
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Syano posted:The kind that has OEM installs of office basic? I mean seriously its not that hard to figure out dude... Yep Looks like it to me.... Edit: Ah, looks like office 2003 Basic does not come with powerpoint. I stand corrected. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 21:41 on Nov 19, 2009 |
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Nov 19, 2009 21:37
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meltie posted:Dual core box with it adding up the %CPU counters? I know the Mac does this at least... Nope, just hitting 100% CPU and 100% RAM. Apparently that was 200% for him.  Now, the reason why.... Apparently he got a Norton 2009 3 pack. Installed one on his family computer, one on his son's machine and decided to use the 3rd on his office laptop. Norton and Nod32 were running scans simultaneously. Uninstalling Norton as I type this. Now, just have to figure out how he got local admin rights... VVVV Wow. I honestly don't think I ever realized the basic version existed. And it's only 60 (MSRP) dollars cheaper than Standard. I dunno, to me PowerPoint is one of those things that you get just because you know someone is going to need it. It's so prevalent and over-used that I'm really surprised there's a version without it. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 21:52 on Nov 19, 2009 |
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Nov 19, 2009 21:45
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quote:Hi Monkeybounce, I'm not even sure what this means... All machines have Adobe Reader and the Microsoft Save as PDF plugin installed by default. I checked her install logs from SCCM and they installed successfully. Both of them are free so they don't need licenses. I replied as soon as it came in and I haven't heard anything back yet.
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Nov 24, 2009 16:21
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Midelne posted:Virusmail You, my friend, hit the nail on the head. Thankfully, UAC popped up and that's why I got the email. Now if only it didn't take 20 minutes to explain to her that I didn't send the email, nor did Microsoft of Adobe. We're a small shop, I'm the only IT guy. If it's not from my name or posted on the Sharepoint mainpage, then don't listen to it. Everyone else here understands that.
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Nov 24, 2009 18:01
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Ryouga Inverse posted:hey look, UAC prevented a malware attack. Isn't that something that everyone says doesn't happen? Wait, really? I mean, I know people complain about it all the time, but I thought it was more of a "why does this keep asking me if I want to install Microsoft Office. I've already said yes!" kind of thing. UAC has saved my users quite a few times. I'm not trying to be all Microsoft Fanboy here, but it's definitely one of the more awesome features they've put out. I'll agree that it doesn't stop malware, and there's probably a lot out there that knows how to circumvent it, but in cases like this it seems to be doing exactly what it was designed to do--make people pay attention to/ask questions about what they're doing.
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Nov 24, 2009 19:01
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Casao posted:Yeah, but the whole point is that UAC doesn't really provide security for most users, and Microsoft has come out and say it wasn't really intended to, it was just intended to make it easier to run as a non-admin user and encourage devs to program properly. See, this is what I thought the point of UAC was anyway. It was to stop everyone from running as Administrator accounts and make it easier for Admins to actually run poo poo. Kind of like a gui for code:Edit: vvv One thing I've noticed it does in my office is it stops people from installing poo poo to "Documents". Trillian, Azureus/Vuze/UTorrent etc, MPC-HC, etc could all be "installed" to [My] Documents in the past. Now UAC pops up and stops it. Helps me out a bit. monkeybounce fucked around with this message at 19:43 on Nov 24, 2009 |
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Nov 24, 2009 19:38
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Dick Trauma posted:Wow, that's really not okay. Are you a parachute account of Midelne or is that level of incompetence/laziness/assholery more common than I thought? I think I've been spoiled by Dell's rails. I can't tell you the last time I screwed something in that wasn't a thumbscrew. Though I'm not sure why the new fiber switch we got has full sliding rails...
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Nov 24, 2009 21:57
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psylent posted:I've sumbitted my application, but the job market's pretty competitive so who knows what'll happen. I worked at a small private University. From my experience, the May - August period is the busiest period for IT. Things start to ramp up a few weeks before finals then hit full force the day after students are done. Then it doesn't end again until about three weeks after the students are back. Pretty much any project that required downtime, all the maintenance, new installations, etc would happen in those 3-4 months. One year, we spent the entire summer switching out Cat3 for Cat6 in all 12 buildings, installing new equipment to go along with it, rolling campus wide wireless and VoIP, replaced about 300 workstations, and installed all the tech for a brand new science building. Gotta love multimillion dollar grants. Basically, when the students weren't there we were. Vacations etc were always taken during the academic year. No one really took vacations during the summer.
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Nov 25, 2009 16:57
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