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Boogalo
Jul 8, 2012

Meep Meep






cerious posted:

Thanks for the input. That's kind of what I've been figuring. I figure I can just wait and talk to the vet and see if there are any more surprises as well first too. I don't feel too bad about potentially saying no to this cat since after all none of these medical issues (except maybe the weight, though he didn't look that yuge in the pictures) were disclosed on the initial listing.

Can't exactly meet the cat before unfortunately due to the pandemic - basically no shelters/rescues around here are allowing in-person visits unless it's somewhere like a Petco adoption.

No in person adoption is a bit strict. Pets are a big commitment, potentially 10-20 years, not allowing you to at least interact a bit to see if its a good fit seems like a bit harsh. Our shelter doesn't allow random visitors like me who likes to stop by and pet all of the cats, but they do allow appointments to meet specific cats after pre-adoption paperwork is filled. We're a bit spoiled to have a fantastic spca.

All of that stuff being undisclosed also seems a bit weird.

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Len
Jan 21, 2008

Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!



Mostly joking but have you tried just like opening your front door and then having a nice can of (anything) for dinner? You'll probably get at least a cat that way

cerious
Aug 18, 2010



Boogalo posted:

No in person adoption is a bit strict. Pets are a big commitment, potentially 10-20 years, not allowing you to at least interact a bit to see if its a good fit seems like a bit harsh. Our shelter doesn't allow random visitors like me who likes to stop by and pet all of the cats, but they do allow appointments to meet specific cats after pre-adoption paperwork is filled. We're a bit spoiled to have a fantastic spca.

All of that stuff being undisclosed also seems a bit weird.

Yeah it's been pretty annoying. A lot of places here are only doing virtual adoptions, the ones that aren't are like an hour away and by appointment only. The Petcos here don't even let you interact with the cat, you can only see it through a glass window or something. So at each place I've applied, I've also asked about potential return policies in case it doesn't work out since I can't see them before. Of course, some places either don't have one listed on their website or seem immediately turned off that I've asked. Rescues in particular, I figure these places want to have high permanent placement rates so I'm sure I look skittish as a first-timer asking about potential returns. It's a bit dumb, I think there's one rescue I've looked at that I don't think has adopted a single cat out since I've been looking for the past month or two due to some insane requirements (3 references? and the fact that I might be going back to work and leaving the cat alone for parts of the day is a deal breaker too)

Also yeah the stuff being undisclosed was a bit weird but at least they promptly sent me the pdf vet assessment. Usually they've been good about putting it up on their website before. I figured I'll still do my due diligence and talk to the vet since it doesn't cost me anything though.

I live in a second floor apartment so I can't just get a walk-in cat either. And the strays that I used to see on my walks are in hiding now that it's cold and rainy again.

cerious fucked around with this message at 19:41 on Dec 12, 2020

Boogalo
Jul 8, 2012

Meep Meep






Return policy is a must, really. It's in the animal's best interest too to have a fierce "you must return back to here if things don't work out" policy rather than the new butler being afraid of judgement or punishment and dumping the pet somewhere. Sometimes things just don't work out or its a bad personal and environmental fit.

Oh, one thing you might ask about is foster, programs. You take in and socialize a shy or recovering fro illness/injury kitty, the shelter covers your supplies expenses, then at the end you give them back to the shelter to go up for adoption, and start again, or foster failure and gradually collect former fosters. Most shelters are likely really hurting for foster homes. Some people keep fosters separate in a spare room and some let them roam the whole house, it varies a lot. Some shelters also have "foster to adopt" programs where a foster failure is mostly expected.

cerious
Aug 18, 2010



Boogalo posted:

Return policy is a must, really. It's in the animal's best interest too to have a fierce "you must return back to here if things don't work out" policy rather than the new butler being afraid of judgement or punishment and dumping the pet somewhere. Sometimes things just don't work out or its a bad personal and environmental fit.

Oh, one thing you might ask about is foster, programs. You take in and socialize a shy or recovering fro illness/injury kitty, the shelter covers your supplies expenses, then at the end you give them back to the shelter to go up for adoption, and start again, or foster failure and gradually collect former fosters. Most shelters are likely really hurting for foster homes. Some people keep fosters separate in a spare room and some let them roam the whole house, it varies a lot. Some shelters also have "foster to adopt" programs where a foster failure is mostly expected.

I actually asked some places about foster-to-adopt and only a few had such a program, and even then some were only offering them for kittens or seniors. So my plan was to hear back about a cat first and then ask about possibly foster-to-adopt as well. Maybe I should be asking for that explicitly and seeing if any of them are open to it?

SkyeAuroline
Nov 12, 2020


Boogalo posted:

No in person adoption is a bit strict. Pets are a big commitment, potentially 10-20 years, not allowing you to at least interact a bit to see if its a good fit seems like a bit harsh. Our shelter doesn't allow random visitors like me who likes to stop by and pet all of the cats, but they do allow appointments to meet specific cats after pre-adoption paperwork is filled. We're a bit spoiled to have a fantastic spca.

All of that stuff being undisclosed also seems a bit weird.

Shelter volunteer here, and yeah, this all feels like red flags to me. Safe appointment methods have been figured out for months now (granted, our shelter is generally not as careful as I wish we could be, but we still do a solid job keeping people safe) and they definitely shouldn't be adopting out cats to people who haven't met them in person for the cat's sake if nothing else . Especially if they're initially hiding issues, then there's no way to reliably know about behavior without seeing them.

InvisibleMonkey
Jun 4, 2004


Hey, girl.

We have achieved dual lap cats

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.


Today, I was sitting on the toilet doing normal toilet things when Aleta body-slammed the door open. Usually, this heralds a round of vigorous Toilet Pat's, but today she just stood there, I swear to God with her fists clenched

It was then I realized we were two hours past feeding time.

guys I'm scared

ThatBasqueGuy
Feb 14, 2013

someone introduce jojo to lazyb





Fleta Mcgurn posted:

Today, I was sitting on the toilet doing normal toilet things when Aleta body-slammed the door open. Usually, this heralds a round of vigorous Toilet Pat's, but today she just stood there, I swear to God with her fists clenched

It was then I realized we were two hours past feeding time.

guys I'm scared

Next time don't flex that ur still eating while She's hungry and no one will lose skin

Boogalo
Jul 8, 2012

Meep Meep






Fleta Mcgurn posted:

Today, I was sitting on the toilet doing normal toilet things when Aleta body-slammed the door open. Usually, this heralds a round of vigorous Toilet Pat's, but today she just stood there, I swear to God with her fists clenched

It was then I realized we were two hours past feeding time.

guys I'm scared

I gave up on private poopin long ago.



They'll stop by for attention then cross the hall to nuke the litterbox in solidarity.

InvisibleMonkey posted:

We have achieved dual lap cats



Living the dream.

cerious
Aug 18, 2010



SkyeAuroline posted:

Shelter volunteer here, and yeah, this all feels like red flags to me. Safe appointment methods have been figured out for months now (granted, our shelter is generally not as careful as I wish we could be, but we still do a solid job keeping people safe) and they definitely shouldn't be adopting out cats to people who haven't met them in person for the cat's sake if nothing else . Especially if they're initially hiding issues, then there's no way to reliably know about behavior without seeing them.

That's strange then, it's like the largest cat shelter out in my area. Here's a link to their policy. I basically only have a few pictures and some words to go off of for most cats. It's pretty explicit that there is no in-person meet-and-greet at any stage.

As for return policies this place has the best one, something like 60 days instead. One of the other shelters I was approved for (but the cat I wanted got adopted out before) only has a 3 day trial, which seems crazy to me. Some rescues here only let me do it if the cat is being rehomed directly from the owner, so I have no method of return for cats adopted from foster homes.

I suppose if anyone has any recommendations for shelters/rescues in the PDX area I'd appreciate it as well.

Jayne Doe
Jan 16, 2010


Okay, so, I have a cat problem that I would appreciate any ideas about.

I rent, so I'm very limited in terms of modifications I can make to my living space (i.e., nothing permanent whatsoever). My building is very old and my apartment is particularly weird and hacked together as far as apartments in this building go. My bathroom is the only room in my apartment with a drop ceiling. This drop ceiling has one large gap by the window - it doesn't come out to meet the window and just ends a good ten or so inches away from the window, leaving a large opening that a cat can very easily fit through (there's a very easy path up onto the windowsill, then from there into the drop ceiling). This would be bad enough on its own, but I discovered when getting her out of the drop ceiling that there's a large hole in one of the walls that's hidden by the drop ceiling and leads into some abyss that I don't think she'd be able to get out of on her own.

Okay, whatever, so my solution was to keep my bathroom door shut at all times to prevent my cat getting trapped in the walls. The door does not lock and is very poorly hung / old so she eventually discovered that if she pushed hard enough on the door, it would spring open. So now she can get into the bathroom whenever she wants and is doing so increasingly frequently. Right now she seems to do it solely as an attention-getting method, because she knows I'll drop everything and come running to get her out, but I'm worried that eventually she'll do it when I'm not around and/or in the middle of a meeting that I can't interrupt and will actually end up inside the wall.

I did try building a cardboard wall across the gap, but she was able to pull one of the pieces off because I couldn't attach it that securely without making some sort of permanent modification (and am just overall not that skilled at that sort of thing). Is the only solution to just keep improving my wall building skills until I make something that's impervious to cats? Or is there some easy non-destructive way to improve the door's latching? The other interior door in my apartment doesn't seem to have this problem.

Rotten Red Rod
Mar 5, 2002



Boogalo posted:

I gave up on private poopin long ago.



They'll stop by for attention then cross the hall to nuke the litterbox in solidarity.


Our cats will crowd the bathroom too. One wants to shove his head between your legs to see what you're doing (ew) but also knows you're a captive audience for pets, one jumps on the counter to also whore for pets, and one is just hanging out there because she wants to see what the fuss is about (and because she hopes you'll take a shower so she can drink the leftover shower water, her favorite treat next to chewing plastic).

Hyperlynx
Sep 13, 2015



If I sit on the toilet long enough, lately, this happens

Hyperlynx posted:

Also, look who decided to jump up on my back again and plonk down for some furious purring


cerious
Aug 18, 2010



cerious posted:

That's strange then, it's like the largest cat shelter out in my area. Here's a link to their policy. I basically only have a few pictures and some words to go off of for most cats. It's pretty explicit that there is no in-person meet-and-greet at any stage.

As for return policies this place has the best one, something like 60 days instead. One of the other shelters I was approved for (but the cat I wanted got adopted out before) only has a 3 day trial, which seems crazy to me. Some rescues here only let me do it if the cat is being rehomed directly from the owner, so I have no method of return for cats adopted from foster homes.

I suppose if anyone has any recommendations for shelters/rescues in the PDX area I'd appreciate it as well.

Not quite closure on this but some follow-up. I found a place further out of town that'll actually let me go see the cat that I applied to in person, and they have a really solid policy where they'll always be able to accept a return. Just got off the phone with them about a very cute and friendly 3 year old male cat in good health that I applied to last night. They had answers about questions I had regarding potential separation anxiety when I go back to work, dietary needs, etc. So I'm feeling much more comfortable about going forward with this group.

Thanks yalls for the input, don't think I would've put this cat on my radar if it wasn't for that advice to look at 3-5 year olds.

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003



Jayne Doe posted:

Okay, so, I have a cat problem that I would appreciate any ideas about.

I rent, so I'm very limited in terms of modifications I can make to my living space (i.e., nothing permanent whatsoever). My building is very old and my apartment is particularly weird and hacked together as far as apartments in this building go. My bathroom is the only room in my apartment with a drop ceiling. This drop ceiling has one large gap by the window - it doesn't come out to meet the window and just ends a good ten or so inches away from the window, leaving a large opening that a cat can very easily fit through (there's a very easy path up onto the windowsill, then from there into the drop ceiling). This would be bad enough on its own, but I discovered when getting her out of the drop ceiling that there's a large hole in one of the walls that's hidden by the drop ceiling and leads into some abyss that I don't think she'd be able to get out of on her own.

Okay, whatever, so my solution was to keep my bathroom door shut at all times to prevent my cat getting trapped in the walls. The door does not lock and is very poorly hung / old so she eventually discovered that if she pushed hard enough on the door, it would spring open. So now she can get into the bathroom whenever she wants and is doing so increasingly frequently. Right now she seems to do it solely as an attention-getting method, because she knows I'll drop everything and come running to get her out, but I'm worried that eventually she'll do it when I'm not around and/or in the middle of a meeting that I can't interrupt and will actually end up inside the wall.

I did try building a cardboard wall across the gap, but she was able to pull one of the pieces off because I couldn't attach it that securely without making some sort of permanent modification (and am just overall not that skilled at that sort of thing). Is the only solution to just keep improving my wall building skills until I make something that's impervious to cats? Or is there some easy non-destructive way to improve the door's latching? The other interior door in my apartment doesn't seem to have this problem.
Probably child proof door latches or something. Even in a rental, you're allowed to make small modifications for safety, so drilling a hole to install something like this latch is permitted. And of course you can remove it after you move out and spackle over the tiny hole before you turn in the keys. Alternately yell at your landlord fix the giant hole in your bathroom.

Corte
Jun 28, 2005


Pretty much and my wits' end with my cat with respect to their talkative nature whether you want to call it crying, whining or whatever. I have tried really hard to be patient and understanding but what I'm capable of currently doesn't seem to be enough. I know the problem lies with how I'm reacting to his behaviour and he's not at fault but I shouted at him last night and feel like poo poo. It's not fair to him and he deserves better. At this point I think my options left are:
- move them back to an entirely dry food diet using the automatic feeder
- switch from timed feeding to free feeding of dry food, with or without wet food
- find them a new home

I'll feel guilty as it means compromising on his diet which could negatively impact his physical health but maybe it's the lesser of two evils if it means we can get along and I don't lose my temper.

My parents may be willing to take him but they are regularly away for 2-3 days a week. My experience with their care for cats is that they free feed dry food, no wet food, leave for weekends, sift the litter inconsistently and never play with them. Maybe it was in part due to the behaviour or personality of the cat, I don't know. Suffice to say they would not get the same level of care that I currently provide or understand to be considered acceptable.

I brought him to my parents to spend the holidays. I have already been criticized for not feeding him enough and they have responded to his crying by giving him Temptations.

Corte fucked around with this message at 23:49 on Dec 14, 2020

Hello Sailor
May 3, 2006

we're all mad here


Jayne Doe posted:

Okay, so, I have a cat problem that I would appreciate any ideas about.

Have you already jammed something (like a shirt you don't care about) under the door to make it difficult for a cat to push open?

Rotten Red Rod
Mar 5, 2002



What is the reason you're so hesitant to free-feed him? Does he have a tendency to over-eat and gain weight, or are you just assuming he will do that?

homeless
Jan 2, 2005
not so much

Wanted to stop by and say thanks for the FAQ in the OP, helped tremendously with a cord chewing situation.

edit: snipped

homeless fucked around with this message at 04:11 on Dec 15, 2020

Corte
Jun 28, 2005


Rotten Red Rod posted:

What is the reason you're so hesitant to free-feed him? Does he have a tendency to over-eat and gain weight, or are you just assuming he will do that?

I guess I was just going by what I read about scheduled feeding versus free feeding and the directions on the bag. He's a rescue, devours anything put in front of him and always tries to get at anything left out or I'm eating. I assumed given he lived on the street for some, if not all, of his life that his wiring that tells him to eat as much as possible, because who knows when food will be available again, would be even more exacerbated.

I know our last family cat was free fed weight control dry food and was definitely overweight. Initially I was feeding him a more than what was recommended and the vet identified weight gain from his first visit to his second visit a couple months later. They said he was at a healthy weight and I should reduce his consumption.

Jayne Doe
Jan 16, 2010


kw0134 posted:

Alternately yell at your landlord fix the giant hole in your bathroom.
Ha, this is the real answer, but it took almost a year of me yelling "there's water leaking into my apartment every time it rains! Okay, now it's leaking in a different spot! Guys, really, you have a legal obligation to fix this!" for them to actually effectively fix the issue, so I have very little faith that they'll actually do anything in a reasonable timeframe. Especially because now that Covid cases are spiking in our area again, they've notified us that they're no longer going to do any non-emergency maintenance.

Thanks for the ideas re: child latch and wedging something under the door. I'm a little embarrassed that I hadn't thought to try wedging something!

Buff Hardback
Jun 11, 2019



Jayne Doe posted:

Ha, this is the real answer, but it took almost a year of me yelling "there's water leaking into my apartment every time it rains! Okay, now it's leaking in a different spot! Guys, really, you have a legal obligation to fix this!" for them to actually effectively fix the issue, so I have very little faith that they'll actually do anything in a reasonable timeframe. Especially because now that Covid cases are spiking in our area again, they've notified us that they're no longer going to do any non-emergency maintenance.

Thanks for the ideas re: child latch and wedging something under the door. I'm a little embarrassed that I hadn't thought to try wedging something!

Other option: I guarantee you they're never going to lift a drop ceiling when doing a move out inspection, just get a plywood board and some screws and just patch the hole if it's small enough.

Len
Jan 21, 2008

Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!



Jayne Doe posted:

Ha, this is the real answer, but it took almost a year of me yelling "there's water leaking into my apartment every time it rains! Okay, now it's leaking in a different spot! Guys, really, you have a legal obligation to fix this!" for them to actually effectively fix the issue, so I have very little faith that they'll actually do anything in a reasonable timeframe. Especially because now that Covid cases are spiking in our area again, they've notified us that they're no longer going to do any non-emergency maintenance.

Thanks for the ideas re: child latch and wedging something under the door. I'm a little embarrassed that I hadn't thought to try wedging something!

My apartment complex rebuilt everyone's balcony earlier this year and left my power socket off. Just some wires dangling out of the wall with electrical tape on them. Nothing in my circuit box was turned off so I assume the control is outside somewhere but for all I know they were live.

I tried calling the office, I tried calling their boss, I tried calling the main company and couldn't get anyone to tell me when a fix was going to get done. Then they sent a letter out that due to covid all non-emergency maonten was being postponed indefinitely and I immediately went to Facebook and posted a picture asking if those wires counted as emergency maintenance. Someone was out the next day to give me my power outlet back.

Kitfox88
Aug 20, 2007





Len posted:

My apartment complex rebuilt everyone's balcony earlier this year and left my power socket off. Just some wires dangling out of the wall with electrical tape on them. Nothing in my circuit box was turned off so I assume the control is outside somewhere but for all I know they were live.

I tried calling the office, I tried calling their boss, I tried calling the main company and couldn't get anyone to tell me when a fix was going to get done. Then they sent a letter out that due to covid all non-emergency maonten was being postponed indefinitely and I immediately went to Facebook and posted a picture asking if those wires counted as emergency maintenance. Someone was out the next day to give me my power outlet back.

Legal system won’t do poo poo, shame em on social media and you’ll get an instant response

Elvis_Maximus
Oct 7, 2007

Relaxing AND Refreshing


Read through the OP, and am an idiot, but looking for advice on the later stages of introducing two cats together. In this case, we have an older female cat that's about 12 or so, we adopted her from a shelter when she was somewhere around a year and a half. She had kittens early, so she's very small. The other cat is a kitten that's about 3 - 4 months old. He's currently in a bit of a wrestling phase, but he's gotten a lot better!

We've been slowly introducing the kitten since he was comfortable in our bedroom. We've been following the "Jackson Galaxy" method that we'd found online. So far we've done the following:
  • Slowly moved their food bowls closer at specific feeding times with the door closed. Eventually we were able to get them eating on exact opposite sides of the door without any issue
  • Repeated the same process over another week and a half or so with a pet gate in the door frame. We were able to get them to opposite sides of the door again with no to minor complaints from the elderly cat. Really the only time she complained was when the kitten tried to playfully bop her through the gate, which she didn't like very much!
  • We have been letting them have supervised time in the same room with their feedings now. Again, the kitten likes to wander close and stare at the elderly cat while she's eating, and she doesn't seem to care much at all during the actual feeding. Afterwards she generally just wants to go take a nap and the kitten is content to just observe so we usually just end it after awhile with no hissing. This has been about a week or so. At first there was a little bit of noises from the older cat but now it's mostly a non-event.

We're not sure what to do next however. The guides mostly say that we need to let them comingle now, but any time we bring the baby cat downstairs the older one starts to get hissy and growly.

The other day the kitten tried to play with the older cat. She was actually pretty fine with the kitten getting quite close, but once he tried to touch her she sounded very angry about it. Loud hissing and growling, no poofing or anything but was definitely not enjoying the attempt!

Any ideas on next steps? I saw another recommendation about using a cat carrier or dog crate to keep the new cat safe and in view of the older cat, so we were thinking that maybe seeing the kitten regularly in the "her" territory downstairs might help.

I feel like they're so close to being able to coexist, I just don't want to let them roam free and end up with a big fight. Especially since while the adult cat is very small, she's still bigger than the kitten.

Jayne Doe
Jan 16, 2010


Buff Hardback posted:

Other option: I guarantee you they're never going to lift a drop ceiling when doing a move out inspection, just get a plywood board and some screws and just patch the hole if it's small enough.
Oh man, I'm such a rule-following dweeb that this honestly never occurred to me. They wouldn't even know that it was my doing, because the building changed owners while I was living here and (a) the first owner never did a written condition report and (b) the current owner didn't bother inspecting the occupied units. So they'd just assume it was some hacked together maintenance from the first owner, as usual.

Rotten Red Rod
Mar 5, 2002



Hissing and growling is inevitable - as long as it doesn't devolve into an actual fight you're fine. It's just part of the process of getting used to the new cat and establishing boundries. I think you should keep letting them interact, with your observation, for limited periods of time. Putting one in a carrier doesn't sound like a great idea, as it'll be so focused on the fact it's confined in a carrier that it won't have positive interactions with the other cat.

Elvis_Maximus posted:

The other day the kitten tried to play with the older cat. She was actually pretty fine with the kitten getting quite close, but once he tried to touch her she sounded very angry about it. Loud hissing and growling, no poofing or anything but was definitely not enjoying the attempt!

Again, this was not a bad thing! This was the older cat teaching the younger cat what the boundaries of their interactions were. Keep going, keep letting them interact for longer and longer times.

Elvis_Maximus posted:

I feel like they're so close to being able to coexist, I just don't want to let them roam free and end up with a big fight. Especially since while the adult cat is very small, she's still bigger than the kitten.

Most adult cats do NOT see kittens as a serious threat and won't actually want to hurt them. It's really unlikely that anything bad will happen, and if things get a little rough, remember kittens LOVE playing rough.

Rotten Red Rod fucked around with this message at 17:33 on Dec 15, 2020

Cythereal
Nov 8, 2009



Rotten Red Rod posted:

Hissing and growling is inevitable - as long as it doesn't devolve into an actual fight you're fine. It's just part of the process of getting used to the new cat and establishing boundries. I think you should keep letting them interact, with your observation, for limited periods of time.

This. Everything sounds perfectly normal, and kittens are assholes who are going to get whapped in the face regularly by adult cats.

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003



I have three cats and all three will growl/hiss at any of the other two when they're being jerks. And two of them are siblings who have literally never been apart from each other! There's a lot of space between mortal enemies and cat piles. No blood, no claws, no foul.

explosivo
May 23, 2004

Fueled by Satan

I saw my older cat absolutely whap our other cat on the head hard enough last night that it sounded like hitting a goddamn coconut. He did not try to bite her again.

InvisibleMonkey
Jun 4, 2004


Hey, girl.

Elvis_Maximus posted:

Read through the OP, and am an idiot, but looking for advice on the later stages of introducing two cats together. In this case, we have an older female cat that's about 12 or so, we adopted her from a shelter when she was somewhere around a year and a half. She had kittens early, so she's very small. The other cat is a kitten that's about 3 - 4 months old. He's currently in a bit of a wrestling phase, but he's gotten a lot better!

We've been slowly introducing the kitten since he was comfortable in our bedroom. We've been following the "Jackson Galaxy" method that we'd found online. So far we've done the following:
  • Slowly moved their food bowls closer at specific feeding times with the door closed. Eventually we were able to get them eating on exact opposite sides of the door without any issue
  • Repeated the same process over another week and a half or so with a pet gate in the door frame. We were able to get them to opposite sides of the door again with no to minor complaints from the elderly cat. Really the only time she complained was when the kitten tried to playfully bop her through the gate, which she didn't like very much!
  • We have been letting them have supervised time in the same room with their feedings now. Again, the kitten likes to wander close and stare at the elderly cat while she's eating, and she doesn't seem to care much at all during the actual feeding. Afterwards she generally just wants to go take a nap and the kitten is content to just observe so we usually just end it after awhile with no hissing. This has been about a week or so. At first there was a little bit of noises from the older cat but now it's mostly a non-event.

We're not sure what to do next however. The guides mostly say that we need to let them comingle now, but any time we bring the baby cat downstairs the older one starts to get hissy and growly.

The other day the kitten tried to play with the older cat. She was actually pretty fine with the kitten getting quite close, but once he tried to touch her she sounded very angry about it. Loud hissing and growling, no poofing or anything but was definitely not enjoying the attempt!

Any ideas on next steps? I saw another recommendation about using a cat carrier or dog crate to keep the new cat safe and in view of the older cat, so we were thinking that maybe seeing the kitten regularly in the "her" territory downstairs might help.

I feel like they're so close to being able to coexist, I just don't want to let them roam free and end up with a big fight. Especially since while the adult cat is very small, she's still bigger than the kitten.

Ah, that's where I am at! Our resident kitty is younger (2.5ish) but also a rescue from the mean streets of Romania so she doesn't take any poo poo.
We've been through all of the steps you went through (sans baby-gate but with closed door/opposite ends of the room substitutes) and I think today is the first day they've been together since we let the kitten out for breakfast this morning.
Yes, there's hissing and occasionally we have to break them up because I find it hard to tell wether Katya's often intense pouncing & slapping action is getting out of hand, but they've definitely been testing each other's boundaries which is part of it.
We started the co-mingling by feeding them on opposite ends of the same room and in the beginning watched them very closely so we could separate them before they got too worked up about each other's presence, re-introduction went a little easier each time they ended feeding-time on a positive note. Watch for overly aggressive fighting, some hissing and swatting is normal even though it can be upsetting to see.

Last weekend we had a little bit of a breakthrough and they started to relax more around each other, with one or both of them taking naps in laps without constantly checking for The Intruder. Now they do the little nose-sniff when they pass each other and seem otherwise ok. Baby Kimchi is still spending nights in the bathroom until I feel like Katya's won't pimp-slap her to death by accident, but I feel very confident after the past 2 weeks! Going slow and having patience is def the way to go here.

Elvis_Maximus
Oct 7, 2007

Relaxing AND Refreshing


Rotten Red Rod posted:

Hissing and growling is inevitable - as long as it doesn't devolve into an actual fight you're fine. It's just part of the process of getting used to the new cat and establishing boundries. I think you should keep letting them interact, with your observation, for limited periods of time. Putting one in a carrier doesn't sound like a great idea, as it'll be so focused on the fact it's confined in a carrier that it won't have positive interactions with the other cat.


Again, this was not a bad thing! This was the older cat teaching the younger cat what the boundaries of their interactions were. Keep going, keep letting them interact for longer and longer times.


Most adult cats do NOT see kittens as a serious threat and won't actually want to hurt them. It's really unlikely that anything bad will happen, and if things get a little rough, remember kittens LOVE playing rough.

Hey, thanks for the encouragement here!

Currently when they get to be together in the same room it's in kind of a neutral loft territory but there's not much to do there outside of the toys we've put out. I feel like they should be interacting more often than just for 30 minutes to an hour for feeding, but I'm a little worried that if something does happen it'll move under a bed or somewhere else that'd be hard to get them separated quickly. Maybe it'd be ok to let them both roam between the bedrooms as long as we're strictly observing though. Even with the loud hiss and growl yesterday the older cat was fine coming out from under the bed and getting picked up to leave the room.

Any thoughts here? I guess we could bring the kitten down, but he's not very comfortable on the ground floor quite yet.

InvisibleMonkey posted:

Ah, that's where I am at! Our resident kitty is younger (2.5ish) but also a rescue from the mean streets of Romania so she doesn't take any poo poo.
We've been through all of the steps you went through (sans baby-gate but with closed door/opposite ends of the room substitutes) and I think today is the first day they've been together since we let the kitten out for breakfast this morning.
Yes, there's hissing and occasionally we have to break them up because I find it hard to tell wether Katya's often intense pouncing & slapping action is getting out of hand, but they've definitely been testing each other's boundaries which is part of it.
We started the co-mingling by feeding them on opposite ends of the same room and in the beginning watched them very closely so we could separate them before they got too worked up about each other's presence, re-introduction went a little easier each time they ended feeding-time on a positive note. Watch for overly aggressive fighting, some hissing and swatting is normal even though it can be upsetting to see.

Last weekend we had a little bit of a breakthrough and they started to relax more around each other, with one or both of them taking naps in laps without constantly checking for The Intruder. Now they do the little nose-sniff when they pass each other and seem otherwise ok. Baby Kimchi is still spending nights in the bathroom until I feel like Katya's won't pimp-slap her to death by accident, but I feel very confident after the past 2 weeks! Going slow and having patience is def the way to go here.

We've been feeding them in the same room for a bit over a week now, or maybe it's been a week? Time in 2020 is hard to parse. At first there was a little grumbling, but now it's basically ended as long as the kitten doesn't try to pounce on the older cat.

Were you letting them free roam around your living space after feeding them? Any trouble with them getting into trouble behind/under things?

InvisibleMonkey
Jun 4, 2004


Hey, girl.

Elvis_Maximus posted:

We've been feeding them in the same room for a bit over a week now, or maybe it's been a week? Time in 2020 is hard to parse. At first there was a little grumbling, but now it's basically ended as long as the kitten doesn't try to pounce on the older cat.

Were you letting them free roam around your living space after feeding them? Any trouble with them getting into trouble behind/under things?

We are letting them roam now, but we've building up to it in blocks of time, especially keeping an eye on the resident cat's mood. Katya really enjoys chasing the kitten around and vice versa, but you can tell when she's had enough. We've been trying to solve that by picking up or engaging one of them until the other walks off and chills out, sometimes they definitely needed some alone-time though.
And yeah, we've had to fish a cat out from under the sofa a couple of times but luckily they'll just cry pitifully but allow it. If your cats don't like to be picked up I'd pick an easier room to separate them in, but I think having escape-routes for the cats (furniture, stairs) is more important so ymmv. Then just put them together for longer amounts of time as long as they're doing ok.

Rotten Red Rod
Mar 5, 2002



Elvis_Maximus posted:

Currently when they get to be together in the same room it's in kind of a neutral loft territory but there's not much to do there outside of the toys we've put out. I feel like they should be interacting more often than just for 30 minutes to an hour for feeding, but I'm a little worried that if something does happen it'll move under a bed or somewhere else that'd be hard to get them separated quickly. Maybe it'd be ok to let them both roam between the bedrooms as long as we're strictly observing though. Even with the loud hiss and growl yesterday the older cat was fine coming out from under the bed and getting picked up to leave the room.

Any thoughts here? I guess we could bring the kitten down, but he's not very comfortable on the ground floor quite yet.


We've been feeding them in the same room for a bit over a week now, or maybe it's been a week? Time in 2020 is hard to parse. At first there was a little grumbling, but now it's basically ended as long as the kitten doesn't try to pounce on the older cat.

Were you letting them free roam around your living space after feeding them? Any trouble with them getting into trouble behind/under things?

Two cats existing but not interacting in the same room is exactly what you want. That's how they get used to each other. Give them time, don't try to force interactions.

I think you're worrying too much about being around to separate them. Again, adult cats RARELY perceive kittens as a threat - if they do get into a scuffle, more than likely it'll be more productive to let it play out than to intervene, as it'll just be the older cat establishing boundaries. Unless your older cat has a known history of being aggressive towards other cats you really don't need to worry about her hurting him - after all, have you seen how kittens play? They can take a lot before actually getting hurt. Our most recent kitten (now fully grown) loved to tackle our other two cats when they were twice+ his size, and got pinned to the ground by his throat every time, and he loving loved every second of it.

Rotten Red Rod fucked around with this message at 19:17 on Dec 15, 2020

Len
Jan 21, 2008

Pouches, bandages, shoulderpad, cyber-eye...

Bitchin'!



kw0134 posted:

I have three cats and all three will growl/hiss at any of the other two when they're being jerks. And two of them are siblings who have literally never been apart from each other! There's a lot of space between mortal enemies and cat piles. No blood, no claws, no foul.

rear end in a top hat frequently is an rear end in a top hat to bean and nothing gets him to knock it off until we hear a THUNK and then he scampers away bell jingling in hurt pride.

She puts up a lot but just lays him out and that ends it

Cats gonna cat

pandy fackler
Jun 2, 2020


Hello cat thread

Does anybody have a good brand recommendation for wet wipes that are safe to be around the eyes? Or suggestions for dealing with stubborn crusts from tears.

My small friend has a blocked tear duct in her left eye. It is largely just a cosmetic issue but more prone to mild infection flare-ups. All I can really do is clean the crusties and keep an eye on the discharge, if it starts to increase or change color I give a course of terramycin ointment.

However some of the crusties under her eye are practically baked on. The pet wipes I have don't do much. Some results if I really rub but her patience starts to wear thin and I don't want to risk hurting her. Is there anything else I can try?

friend tax

Rotten Red Rod
Mar 5, 2002



We always just used wet tissue/toilet paper for cleaning the discharge our one-eyed cat had.

Facebook Aunt
Oct 4, 2008

i like cats


Yeah I had that with kittens and we used warm damp paper towel. Warm water is magic.

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HungryMedusa
Apr 27, 2003



There are these things I found at a grocery store, looks like a lot of people use them for pets:

https://www.amazon.com/Boogie-Wipes-Sensitive-Moisturizing-Chamomile/dp/B00G9NG14G

I like them because I can eat in my car like a animal and wipe my hands off without stinky scents. I imagine if they are safe for baby faces, they would be OK on cats. Kind of expensive tho.

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