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Reading this thread made me see a lot of problems I am having currently make sense. I was tested as a kid, but I wasn't diagnosed as having ADD or ADHD, I was diagnosed with just daydreaming too much. I had a lot of the same problems as most people in here describe growing up, homework, school etc. After I turned 18 and I had to rely on myself more, I'm noticing more and more problems and they have been getting progressively worse. I have 'hearing' problems and problems processing what people say. I often find myself grasping for words as well when I'm trying to describe something in varying degrees of actual knowledge of the subject I am trying to describe. I was depressed in middle school and highschool as well as having rage problems, but I was never treated or tested for ADHD (as far as I remember) I kind of "grew" out of the depressed/raging phase as I got older though and I eventually stopped taking physch drugs without much problem. A problem I am often having is focus on hobbies or a particular project. I will obsess about having a hobby one week and then the week after I will obsess about something at work, and then the week after that, I'll be obsessing about eating right, and then I'll go on to obsessing about picking up the trumpet again. It seems to be this never ending cycle of picking things up for a short term, losing my interest and finding something else. For the longest time I figured I was bipolar because my mother is. I have mood swings, but not anything severe like most bipolar people are described to me to be. My mother has OCD as well, and I wonder sometimes if I do. My biggest problem out of all this is that I will get convicted that I need to do something, be enthusiastic about it and then when it comes time to do it, I will make an excuse. People mention showering itt, days I know I have time to shower, I sometimes just don't shower because I don't feel like it. This morning for instance, I got up at 4:30 to go to work at 6 and I had plenty of time to shower, but instead I read Facebook. Trouble grasping words when I'm describing something is a problem because I work in IT and I'm expected to be able to relay information in a professional and comprehensive manner. (at my specific job) What I've tried: Nootropic drugs: anricetam works the best, but it makes me super obsessive. I once stayed at work 6 hours after I needed to be, on maybe 2 hours of sleep and I didn't eat anything at all that day. Meditating: I'll start meditating for a week, and then the cycle will continue again and I'll be back to my habit of picking up and dropping things. Lists: I'll make lists and forget them. I'll leave them lying around, or I'll forget about them, or I'll get obsessed about lists, follow them for a week and then drop lists all together. Though, having lists do help, if I play a more active role in planning my day if I write say, a to-do list first thing in the morning. What I guess I struggle with is that I do not trust doctors and I went for a very long time without health insurance so I became self-reliant and I self medicated for everything. I was also put on varying drugs when I was in therapy and seeing a psychiatrist that made me feel like a zombie and often changed meds to no help. Even now that I have very good health insurance, I rarely go to the doctor if I'm feeling sick. I'm not even sure what I should do to start the process of seeing someone to help with my problems. I guess the question I need to ask is: how do I start the process of getting diagnosed? edit: I function fairly well, I just don't really get a lot done. I'm seen by other people as unmotivated and lazy. sometimes I see myself as that ;/ I'm also very messy. edit2: bah, when I started this, I didn't want it to be so long of a post... I also have problems falling asleep at night because I can't shut off. I did noticed when I played WoW that I was probably in my best setting for escaping all this, but I got obsessive and scared (it ended up being something I did not drop like everything else and the cycle didn't continue while I played WoW, but the rest of my life hosed up) I am actually my best when I am around my close friends and my girlfriend because I feel mentally occupied. I also have a problem with sex too, I run into the problem of thinking about other things often even if I'm so horny it isn't funny. It isn't a problem now because a lack of sex, but it will soon become a problem. In the past, having porn on was the best way to keep me concentrated. (sorry as well for describing things you probably don't want to picture atm) g3k fucked around with this message at 20:31 on Oct 14, 2009 |
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Oct 14, 2009 20:25
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Qu Appelle posted:What type of meditation do you do? Do you have a regular group or sangha that you meet up with? I tried starting out Chakra. It's a good method and it can help me relax, but I'm very easily distracted. I try to do guided meditation while I'm trying to sleep, the basic stuff, start in your feet and move the energy up, etc, describe a serene place in your head and let it just flow. It kind of works and gets me to sleep sometimes, but my mind is alway so drat busy. Some days it feels like I'm hosting Ozzfest in my head. I'd find a group but the only real meditation type stuff is an hour and a half away. I'm stuck with Yoga classes with middle aged cougars, pretensious young girls and guys trying to score. I have a book by some Buddhist leader, started reading it and it sat on my nightstand. I think it's in a box somewhere.
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Oct 15, 2009 00:58
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Qu Appelle posted:Oh, and can I add that Adderall is the biggest mindfuck in the world? I would kill for that. I'm a compulsive eater D:
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Oct 15, 2009 10:26
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Anyone here taking Straterra? My doc decided to put me on it to see how I would react to the meds, but this doesn't mean I'm officially diagnosed as ADHD yet. I've read it takes upwards of a month to start working, I'm coming up on that time and I'm not really seeing/feeling a difference. What is it supposed to feel like?
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Feb 10, 2010 21:49
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