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Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



I've finally done it. Read this entire goddamn thing. Took me 18 months off-and-on. At least most up to 2011-ish was able to be skipped due to broken waffleimages links. My contribution:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ygqNnLeAFM

Him name Artemis.

He came to live with me in 2008. In pure stereotypical cat fashion, I was the chosen one. My local shelter had a satellite location in a shopping center that was cats-only. Most of the cats (a few dozen) free-roamed while staff was present. There were beds and toys and cat trees and hidey-holes everywhere. It was indoor cat heaven, and pretty cool for human cat-ladies as well. One cat, though, was asleep in his closed cage. He was a stray from a local small town, estimated about 2 or 3 years of age, and previously had a URI during his stay in the shelter. His marble tabby colors and handsome face caught my eye, so staff opened the cage door and I sat on the floor as to not scare him. He woke up, stretched, hopped down out of the cage and immediately climbed into my lap to settle down for pets. I'd never seen anything like that before, it was a clear sign. Sir Gallant was his slave name, a fitting one at that - he was absolutely charming.

I picked him up from the cattery on a Saturday morning. At the time I lived alone in a X sq ft apartment without any other pets, but I wasn't sure if he'd be up for exploring right away. Indeed, as soon as I let him out of his carrier, he headed straight for the bedroom and crawled under the bed. I decided to take a nap, and when I woke up 2 hours later, I peered under the dust ruffle to make sure he was still there and to say hello. Astonishingly, he crawled out and jumped up on the bed and made biscuits on my chest. Well, that was easy. From there I showed him around the place. He wasn't skittish at all (even when I ran the dishwasher) and settled in immediately.

Artey was pretty much the perfect cat. He was incredibly lovey and was in my lap 3/4ths of the day. He wasn't really interested in toys or playing most of the time, which was ok because I wanted a chill cat. He greeted me at the door every time I came home from being out and would meow at me. I'd meow back and have conversations with him. He only ate dry food, I couldn't get him interested in canned. He also drank out of his own glass - a short one meant for liquor that'd I'd fill and leave for him on my little dining room table. Taller ones he'd spill once the water level went down enough to where he couldn't reach it. He almost always used his box properly and his poo didn't even stink for some reason. He slept on my legs every night and followed me everywhere when I was awake. He was my best buddy. :3: I had silly names for him like "mister buddy cat", "arteypants mcbuttturds", "boo boo" and the like.

He had some minor health issues probably due to the URI - he was sneezy and snorty, and snored in his sleep, but I didn't think much of it and he was given a clean bill of health during his vet visits. During the 2nd half of 2012, he started losing weight, vomiting often, and most distressingly, coughing. I was having financial difficulties and didn't take him to the vet until November. I wasn't expecting what the vet found - acute heart failure. His chest was full of fluid. They drained the fluid, but I guess the vet visit stressed him out and he went downhill. He became lethargic and no longer greeted me at the door, instead spending nearly all of his time on my bed asleep. I had to give him multiple injections and cream in his ear per day because he was impossible to pill. His kidney function was compromised due to his lack of appetite, and he probably had some fatty liver going on. Still, we both kept at it as best we could, the vet visits and medications basically bankrupting me.

Come April the following year, he had slowly started getting better. He was eating again, greeting me at the door, and spending more time in my lap than on my bed asleep. I thought the worst was over until I had to go out of town for a personal emergency. My neighbor agreed to take care of Artey and give him his shots and stuff, she was a champ and said he did ok with everything. I was gone for a week. When I returned home, Artey was incredibly happy to see me. I gave him lots of love. I wasn't home but for an hour or so, going through my mail, when he suddenly let out this awful meow like he was in pain. He was on my computer desk, I rushed over and sat in the chair and put him in my lap. He pissed on my shirt and clawed into my leg. I started to panic. Even though I had my computer on and running in front of me, my brain decided I needed to get up and get the phone book to call the emergency vet. I set him in the chair and did so, but by the time I came back, his pupils were dialated and he was exhaling for his last time. He was only 8 years old. I bawled for hours.

Turns out my buddycat was the only thing keeping me stable. My own health deteriorated and I had to resign from my job and move into a cheaper apartment with roomates, unable to take care of a cat. I had Artey cremated and I keep his ashes in a box in my closet. I miss him terribly, 2½ years later.

Sorry for the :words:. Because I can't have a cat, post cats

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Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Thanks. I also had a scorpioncat when I was younger. She was the runt of the litter and taken away from her mother too early. She suckled the end of her tail like a pacifier. It was really cute actually. I could hold her in the palm of my hand and I'm not a large human.

SynthOrange posted:

Artey sounded like a great little cat.

He was! He looked a lot like a short-haired Pudding (or Kiska or Minnie or Emilio).

post pudding, kiska, minnie, and emilio

Ofecks fucked around with this message at 04:53 on Sep 29, 2015

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Robert Denby posted:

Sleepy Edith


:3: Why do cats love that cardboard stuff? Artey used to claw the carpet so I got him a Turbo Scratcher to see if he'd take to it and he LOVED it. The last couple weeks he was around, I got him a Scratch Lounge and he was in it whenever he wasn't in my lap. It was hardly used so once Artey had passed I gave it to my neighbor who had two cats. They fought over it. Then I dated a woman who had two cats, and got them one as well. THEY fought over it too.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



PipeRifle posted:

Reuben takes a more active approach to the bucket sock-hunt method

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6DKjcvdUus


I can't be the only one who thought "roobieeeee!" every time he appeared

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




:( Poor Irma. I'm sorry for your loss.

Artey did ok at the vet... as long as I was in the same room. If he was hiding, I trained the doc to sit on the floor and he always crawled in her lap. Once they took him away to get weighed, x-rayed, etc. he flipped the gently caress out and would cause quite a commotion. I distinctly remember the doc referring to him as "a difficult cat to do things to". Sounds about right. He eventually tolerated me picking him up and holding him... for about 15 seconds at most, and only if I was simultaneously providing scritches. After that, total wiggle monster.

Post Moo reaction video to screaming cat video :haw:

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



:cry: I'm sorry, Knubbs was a lovely kitty

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




Best friends forever and ever.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



overdesigned posted:

Moxie trap (not) sprung!


Eeeeeee! :3:

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



SynthOrange posted:

Oh my god shelter kitty, how you face so round?



Get cat

name Cobbler

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Speaking of creamsicles, any news on Peanut? :ohdear:

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



:eyepop:

I hope that's a photoshop, poor baby. :(

Pls post Daev, Bongo, Tara, Talullah, Walt, Pudding, Catblob, Catbot, Leeloo, and Lulu. And Mr. Cat

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Radio! posted:

this is one of my favorite videos and I can't even really explain why

The *boing* sound in the music when the cat winks.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




Pretty kitty marble tabby, much like the late Artey.


It was apparently friday night motherfuckers. That was a difficult picture to take.

ladyweapon posted:


Unironically like this one :3:

I unironically like you and Talullah.

e: Pisska video pro click!

Ofecks fucked around with this message at 15:05 on Nov 5, 2015

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Speaking of cat games, I'm fairly certain this has been posted before, but it comes out Thursday:

http://store.steampowered.com/app/409100/

The trailer is :3: times a lot. Unfortunately I can't play it because I don't have enough RAM (3 dead mobo slots).

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Portals posted:

I love all cats

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Happy Noodle Boy posted:

exhibit a of actual cat:



"we're out of nuggets again"

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Your images seem to be broken.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Grats goon poster Shifty Pony

Josh Lyman posted:

get minnie to celebrate



This is Bob. He belongs to a streamer I watch on occasion. He's really really fat. He's super adorable but it's kinda sad when he tries to roll over and can't do it.

chat yesterday: "do you feed your cat other cats?"

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




This cat is really cute. ty for posting

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




Stuart Drives A Comfortable Car Minnie Is A Beautiful Cat :swoon:


Freudian posted:

Internet cats:





:aaa: So are these. I would name them Twin Famicom Cartridge and Twin Famicom Disk I'm a nerd

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



It's TURKY day!

I am thankful for Walt yospos cattes all cats

Please give Tallulah yospos cattes all cats turky

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Tendai posted:

My mom decided that Kiska needed a cat tree because ????

Because pretty kitty

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Sweet As Sin posted:

Fyodor the 6 month old kitten with a 5'8 girl


:swoon: is this you? Cat am big.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




EEEEEeeeeee Moo with tiger tail :3: :3:

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Deathslushie posted:

Update: Squee is home and well. He more or less had an upset stomach.

However, we discussed the fact that he coughs. We're going to try a round of asthma medication on him, poor little dude.

In the meantime, he's had some very cuddly moments. He's happy to be home.

Did they do chest x-rays? Artey had coughing fits sometimes that I thought was respiratory-related... nope, turns out he was dying of heart failure and his chest was full of fluid. That's like, the worst-case scenario, but I think it's better to know than not know.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Funhilde posted:

Leeloo pretty

Barbershop posted:

He has been named Earl (because he is Grey, love me some terrible work jokes).

His hobbies include getting all up in poo poo he has no business being in, pooping more than you'd think could possibly fit into such a small cat and making sure I get absolutely nothing done when I work from home.

Loaf:


Adorable skinny kitty, pls fatten up.



:3: :3: :3: :3: :3: :3: :3:

Some incredible catposting today.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Sweet As Sin posted:


Babby big. Still needs a name.

Luisfe posted:



And if you don't go to sleep the cucumber will appear

El Pepino

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




:stare: Wanna sit in the middle of that clowder with treats.

Portals posted:



current cat status: confused next to a toilet


Grats on your new cat. Love that cat :3:

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Trig Discipline posted:



whoops, catnip just kicked in

:eyepop: :eyepop: :eyepop:

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



I wish my family had cats I could visit. Nope, they're either petless or *shudder* dog people. :argh:

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Echeveria posted:

Forgive the terrible pics. He's taking advantage of the free pets and absolutely assaults us when we come in the room. He's really sweet, he loves to nuzzle and cuddle, and purrs the whole time. We got him... oh, an hour ago.











I'm called a cow
I'm not about
To throw it now
For all the cows

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXg5bNXmY0k




Every time I see the Aggro Gator ad with OC flicking his ear I always click it just because

Bye 2015, gently caress off pls

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



I saw cinnabun-flavored ice cream at the store today.

I kinda had to buy it.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Beast of Bourbon posted:

so in recent cat development

black esteban has been :siren: on the bed :siren:. before he wouldn't even jump on it or sleep on it when we're not home, but we got a new king size bed and tuft & needle mattress and I guess that was a sign for him to just chill on it all day. it's great, we're turning him back in to a bed cat.

esteban is unchanged.

I like how your cats are named after my favorite 80's superstar siblings Gloria and Emilio Esteban :buddy:

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



ladyweapon posted:

Some nights I'll be sitting on the couch when I start hearing a scraping sound nearby. Without fail, it is always Tallulah licking the living room wall.

I used to live with a cat that enjoyed licking photographs. cats man

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




Human legs = the original Fort Warms.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




I would like to be this cat

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




Poor baby! He's so well-behaved though. What's his story again?

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.




El Estebaño esta muy bueno.

Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Criscodisco please post your cattery. It has been too long.

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Ofecks
May 4, 2009

A portly feline wizard waddles forth, muttering something about conjured food.



Remember this cat? I do.

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